The (Not a Fucking Rant) Jihad Sermon #4: Yeah, You!

[Irreverend Hugh, KSC]

Sermon on Eristicism 4: Yeah, You!

"...each individual is sacred. Each of us has our own direct line to the truth; each of us is her/his own Pope, so nobody can be invested with authority over us."
-Starhawk (from Dreaming the Dark, pgs. 35-36)

"Cuirfidh siad ruaig ar Ghalla!"
-Irish folksong

"I want you to know that enlightenment is just a light switch away, but make sure the bulb is screwed in all the way and that you have enough toothpaste for the night."
-Irreverend Hugh

Since the dominance of the Church with its story of "the Fall" at the Garden of Eden, we have trapped by the pernicious lie that all those who try hard enough will make it into the circles of the elite. They will become 'saved'. It says that, with enough hard work, people can 'make it' and become something of value, as opposed to the rest of society which is said to be worthless. These people will then be discovered by the elite and welcomed in back to heaven with open arms.
In our secular world, with the Church thankfully disarmed, the story is now a financial story of getting rich, or of becoming someone who matters, someone who moves and shakes the world, someone who has power over others. This is now called 'the American Dream' as opposed to 'the Garden of Eden' or 'Salvation.'

Sounds good? Too bad it's a line of bullshit which gets you to believe that there are two sorts of humans: one who now has no merit or value; and another that has all the content and meaning. It's the same lie that gets the working class to become myopic and small minded, while distracting them from the fact that they are acquiescent instead of rising up and taking that which they have produced as their own hard earned fruits.

What does this have to do with you Discordians?

This same lie is used by some of you who believe yourselves to be so much more freer or smarter than all the rest, who you then call greyfaces...or the no-good-shits, or worthless. And then you go around imagining that what you are doing in your pretense of O.M. is much more important to the world somehow than both what Bubba does on the factory floor or what Bubba does on her weekends. Really? Do you really believe that spurious imitations of surrealist pranking have more value or importance than what someone like Bubba does with her time?

You then go on ahead and believe yourselves to be saved from mental drudgery by becoming a supposed follower of Eris and/or the Discordian Society (even when we shout at you that we want no followers). Yeah, you've made it now. You are one of the free people as opposed to the worthless sheeple. You are smarter and faster and better and shinier than all those other inferior brands of certifiably grade A individuals that the factory of society produces. You have a superior marketability because of your assumed weirdness. You are part of something now. Yeah.

Wipe that snot from your face this instant. The DJ is vehemently opposed to such crap. We will find it, wherever it is, and flush it down the toilets in our Erisian temples. And if your weirdness is simply an attempt at trying to make yourself seem like one who has 'made it' or one who is 'better' than all the rest of humanity, we will destroy it by possibly handing you over to the 'normals' you so often complain about. You would be surprised who the real freaks are. And the walking glitches don't go around believing themselves to have 'made it' anywhere. They are too busy to do so. They don't buy the American Dream or Salvation or entrance to the Garden of Eden, although they may sell it to others at special holiday sale prices. Nor do they believe in all that bullshit about how stupid the so-called normals and averages are.

If you, as an individual are most important, why would you assume that someone else on this Earth is less important? If you are a Pope then everyone else you meet is a Pope, too. Or did that old Erisian joke not register in your brain?

If you have fallen victim to this vile lie, you should report at once to one of our field agents who will be glad tell you everything you wanted to hear. But do it now, this special onetime offer is going fast.

Even better, just forget you even heard this. It's funnier that way.

(12.6.2004)

[Horab Fibslager]

strive for normality, and seek in simplicity the average.

alot less noise that way. and you get twice the kicks for half the work.

[Ben]

Bahhhhhhhh!

[chaosgraves:agentoferis]

Alright but if I'm going to tell you eberything you want to hear you have to file form 2468STFU-NUb in exactlicate in sector WTFRUT- Pepsicon 8.

and I'll get right on that.

there is of coure the small matter of a fileing fee.

[Zurtok Khan]

I had a great post typed up here, and then the internet eat it...so I have to try and type it again.

flush it down the toilets in our Erisian temples

OMG!  Our Temples have toilets?  I knew I wasn't supposed to pee in the Holy Water...

Hugh, as usual I think your post is full of Shit.  But I like Shit, so I like you (being also full of Shit) and your post.  *Hugs the Shit*  I hope you like me too, even though I have an Ah. D. (Doctorate of Asshattery).

Now, I agree with you completely.  There is an ancient oriental text (I believe Taoist, but my brain is toasted as its Finals Week), that says "Doctrines are for pointing to the mind, once one sees the mind, why pay attention to doctrines?"  Actually I'm sure it doesn't say that, I'm sure it's in some ancient Dialect, but thats close enough.

The Pope Joke is for pointing at the PROBLEM, once one sees the PROBLEM, what good is the Pope Joke?

It's shit.  It's there to point us in the right direction, and then let us run free like 9 year old girl in a feild of daisies.  Well, that or an Ogre assdeep in mud chasing a peice of chocolate cake (bad EQ/EQ2 joke).

I once told a friend of mine to read the PD, and then forget it.  She missed the point, and wondered why she was supposed to read it, if she was supposed to forget it afterward.  Ohh well.

Greyfaces are not any different then us.  They have a different outlook on life.  They (fairly uniformly) do not see the world as being a pretty place with lots of flowers.  Not that I see the world as having lots of flowers (really, it's more black top then flowers...).  But, most Discordians, as I far as I can see (and I need glasses so it's not very far), look at the world from a different perspective then a "Greyface."

We think no special thoughts, do no special deed that has not been done before.  We're all Popes, and they're all Popes.  Eris has no problem saying that EVERYONE is her people.  For some reason Yahweh (or at least how he's been interpreted...) wants only people who believe in him to be his people...we all know thats full of shit (thats wonderful mental conditioning, isn't it?  Ohh fuck, I like shit don't I?  I geuss it's full of Mushrooms, I HATE mushrooms).

The Buddha said, "Everything Distinct, Everything the Same."  We would only be us if there was a them.

[Horab Fibslager]

We would only be us if there was a them.

i'm stealing that.

[Zurtok Khan]

I feel special now =)

[Wishfarple]

Too bad it's a line of bullshit which gets you to believe that there are two sorts of humans: one who now has no merit or value; and another that has all the content and meaning.

. . .

You would be surprised who the real freaks are. And the walking glitches don't go around believing themselves to have 'made it' anywhere. They are too busy to do so. They don't buy the American Dream or Salvation or entrance to the Garden of Eden, although they may sell it to others at special holiday sale prices. Nor do they believe in all that bullshit about how stupid the so-called normals and averages are.

I agree with you!  It's BAAAAD to differentiate between "normals" and Discordians, and any REAL Discordian would KNOW that!  Any TRUE Erisian would understand how wrong it is to divide the world into different categories of people!

[/o\]

thanks for keeping some of us sharp

[fluffy]

::drunk on "special" eggnog::

...and a discordian in a pope tree...

[agent compassion]

Geez. So much wisdom in one thread. My head asplode!

Political parties are especially rife with that shit you're talking, Hugh. Worse than us even. I think they wouldn't survive without the groupthink of "us and them."

Granted, everybody is somebody else's They. But the sheer magnitude in which that ploy is used to cause emnity and cessation of rational thought - it's mindboggling!

[Zurtok Khan]

But the sheer magnitude in which that ploy is used to cause emnity and cessation of rational thought - it's mindboggling!

First, you're talking politics, and we all know that politics has already caused the cesation of the rational mind.

I agree with you! It's BAAAAD to differentiate between "normals" and Discordians, and any REAL Discordian would KNOW that! Any TRUE Erisian would understand how wrong it is to divide the world into different categories of people!

Is that capital R real?  Is that capital T true?

(Btw, why don't we capitalize capital?)

[agent compassion]

But the sheer magnitude in which that ploy is used to cause emnity and cessation of rational thought - it's mindboggling!


First, you're talking politics, and we all know that politics has already caused the cesation of the rational mind.

And yet...politics is a structure wherein people spend a lot of their time relating and working, and its products have a greater than average impact on things, which is WHY the loss of rationality there is so much more dangerous - I can decide to eat this pair of scissors right now, and it only harms me, but if I go join a PAC that decides to, say, ban headlights on cars, and the efforts are successful, that's a lot of cars wrapped around trees. But we ALWAYS have the opportunity to turn our brains on, even in politics. Just sayin'.

[Horab Fibslager]

politics is an artifical us and them situation. worse so than games like cs, wher its; ct's vs t's/




no seriously.

[agent compassion]

politics is an artifical us and them situation. worse so than games like cs, wher its; ct's vs t's/

You're not allowed to play with the glue anymore.

Artificial or not, the politicians still show up for work. And the problem is, they leave their brains at home.