Official TGRR Stories/Facts for Young Discordians and Other Brats Thread.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Gather, children, and I shall tell you about 1986. 

Reagan was president and Thatcher was PM in two countries that are supposed to be sovereign with respect to each other.  It rained day and night, and nobody could smile without bleeding.  Boy George was on A Team.  Voyager 2 had it's first encounter with Uranus, leading to non-stop stale jokes amidst the death of the manned space program.  The first computer virus, "Brain", was released.  The Challenger exploded.

Hands Across America led the way in useless attention-whore-y gestures that don't change shit.  Did I mentioned that it never stopped raining?  Mookie Wilson shamed himself and effectively killed baseball as a sport that anyone cares about outside of Boston.  Oliver North shredded a bunch of documents, effectively killing government as a sport that anyone cares about outside of Washington, DC.

It rained some more.  12.9" in ONE NIGHT in Sydney, Australia.  Richter invented the earthquake.  Some bastard gives birth to Megan Fox.  Some other bastard spawns Shia LaBeouf.  L Ron Hubbard croaks.  James Cagney dies.  Madonna releases True Blue.  The Moody Blues shame themselves forever with The Other Side of Life.

We've talked about the rain, right? 

Anyway, 1986 was my last year of being a kid, as I went in the army in 1987.  Marijuana was $30/quarter and acid was $4/hit.  It was also the last year I watched TV with anything resembling regularity, and was in fact the reason I stopped watching TV (I am not required to put up with shit like ALF). 

Religion was bigger than it is today, but was a little more inclusive (women were not considered cattle).  You could always count on Jerry Falwell and Pat Robertson to say something incredibly stupid on television once a week, and the only way any of us made it through that year was by staying drunk on shitty American beer and smoking pot grown in a window box in Toledo by some scrawny shits that needed the cash to support their heroin habits.

If anyone ever invents a time machine, kick his ass before he tries bringing any bullshit back from 1986.  You've been warned.

[hooplala]

In 1986 I was eleven years old.  All I remember is Small Wonder, a tv show about a republican trying to pretend it's human. 

That, and the rain.

[The Johnny]

I was born in 1986. 

[The Good Reverend Roger]

I was born in 1986. 

So was Shia LaBeouf.  So you have that going for you.   

[Aucoq]

I probably would've been born in 1986, but I had to hold out another year until my life's theme song came out: Gloria Estefan's "Rhythm Is Gonna Get You."  It sounds like I dodged a bullet.

In 1986 I was eleven years old.  All I remember is Small Wonder, a tv show about a republican trying to pretend it's human. 

[Ben Shapiro]

I was a wee bear being born.

[Faust]

I was born in 1986. 

So was Shia LaBeouf.  So you have that going for you.   

When was the last time you saw The Johnny and Shia in the same place at the same time?

[P3nT4gR4m]

1986 was a fucking riot. I wont hear a word against it 

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

I don't remember 1986.

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

I don't remember 1986.

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

and the only way any of us made it through that year was by staying drunk on shitty American beer and smoking pot grown in a window box in Toledo by some scrawny shits that needed the cash to support their heroin habits.

[Sita]

I was 5 for most of that year (yay for november birthdays, always making me have to think what age I actually was during events).

The most I remember is watching cartoons like Transformers and He-Man and anxiously waiting for the end of Kindergarten and the start of 1st grade. Vaguely remember being in school and watching the Challenger take off. Adults act oddly around kids when something bad happens but they don't want to try and explain it, but instead just move on with the day like nothing happened.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Crowd around, you little bastards, and let me tell you why your life is so fucked up.  You little fucking zygotes were dumped out of the soup bucket of box-wine and also-ran sperm that passed for a womb, sometime at the end of the 20th century.  And those of us crusty and gnarled enough to remember a good-sized chunk of the 20th century can tell you that it wasn't a very good century for people.  Good for TECH, but not particularly good for Arminians, Jews, Rwandans, and anyone else who happened to get in the way.  And that fastest-yet-least-sexy of all centuries will continue to haunt the world until everyone involved in it is safely nailed into our coffins and covered over with concrete.

So it isn't your fault, but that doesn't really matter.