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Today, for a brief second, I thought of a life without Roger. It was much like my current life, except that this forum was a bit nicer.

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Things I expect on a date.

Started by Fujikoma, April 04, 2019, 12:05:59 AM

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Al Qədic

#15
April 04, 2019, 04:13:59 AM
There is no reason to,
Be ashamed of poetry. It,
Is natural. But you should,
Still do it in private,
And wash your hands afterward.

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#16
April 04, 2019, 04:16:01 AM
Horses have the worst sweat ever and are horrible in every other way too.

Exhibits:

Horse teeth are like dentures but natural.


Horse hooves are just fucking horrible. As in they are literally giant middle finger nails.


And they get to looking genuinely unsettling in certain special breeds.
Look at this hellbeast!

Oh, not horrible enough? Let's aim for maximum phallic symbolism this time.


Horses are terrible
"I am that worst of all type of criminal...I cannot bring myself to do what you tell me, because you told me."

There's over 100 of us in this meat-suit. You'd think it runs like a ship, but it's more like a hundred and ten angry ghosts having an old-school QuakeWorld tournament, three people desperately trying to make sure the gamers don't go hungry or soil themselves, and the Facilities manager weeping in the corner as the garbage piles high.

Fujikoma

#17
April 04, 2019, 04:17:42 AM
You're seriously harshing on my fursona.

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#18
April 04, 2019, 04:21:23 AM
It isn't my fault your fursona is an emissary of hell itself, bucko. You should pick something nice and wholesome next time, like an anteater.

"I am that worst of all type of criminal...I cannot bring myself to do what you tell me, because you told me."

There's over 100 of us in this meat-suit. You'd think it runs like a ship, but it's more like a hundred and ten angry ghosts having an old-school QuakeWorld tournament, three people desperately trying to make sure the gamers don't go hungry or soil themselves, and the Facilities manager weeping in the corner as the garbage piles high.

Fujikoma

#19
April 04, 2019, 04:22:44 AM
Yep, this place has still got it, I love you guys.

The Johnny

#20
April 04, 2019, 04:32:55 AM
Quote from: nullified on April 04, 2019, 04:16:01 AM




Why is that Pug wearing a wig and why does it have such a long neck?
<<My image in some places, is of a monster of some kind who wants to pull a string and manipulate people. Nothing could be further from the truth. People are manipulated; I just want them to be manipulated more effectively.>>

-B.F. Skinner

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#21
April 04, 2019, 04:36:33 AM
That's what happens when you let horses and dogs breed, the way the liberals want.
"I am that worst of all type of criminal...I cannot bring myself to do what you tell me, because you told me."

There's over 100 of us in this meat-suit. You'd think it runs like a ship, but it's more like a hundred and ten angry ghosts having an old-school QuakeWorld tournament, three people desperately trying to make sure the gamers don't go hungry or soil themselves, and the Facilities manager weeping in the corner as the garbage piles high.

Doktor Howl

#22
April 04, 2019, 05:44:26 AM
Quote from: Fujikoma on April 04, 2019, 02:36:00 AM
NOOO, not the barrel, for real, someone else post because I don't want to find out what the "barrel" is.

How could anyone make it past age 10 without knowing that joke?  It's as old as Caesar.
Molon Lube

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#23
April 04, 2019, 05:47:54 AM
Truth be told, I don't know it either.
"I am that worst of all type of criminal...I cannot bring myself to do what you tell me, because you told me."

There's over 100 of us in this meat-suit. You'd think it runs like a ship, but it's more like a hundred and ten angry ghosts having an old-school QuakeWorld tournament, three people desperately trying to make sure the gamers don't go hungry or soil themselves, and the Facilities manager weeping in the corner as the garbage piles high.

Doktor Howl

#24
April 04, 2019, 05:49:57 AM
Quote from: nullified on April 04, 2019, 05:47:54 AM
Truth be told, I don't know it either.

Sergeant is showing the new recruit around the foreign legion post. 

"So we're pretty isolated here, so when you get anxious, you can stick your dick in that barrel - any day except Friday - and you'll be taken care of."

"Why not Friday?"

"Because Friday is your day in the barrel."
Molon Lube

altered

#25
April 04, 2019, 05:51:44 AM
Ah.
"I am that worst of all type of criminal...I cannot bring myself to do what you tell me, because you told me."

There's over 100 of us in this meat-suit. You'd think it runs like a ship, but it's more like a hundred and ten angry ghosts having an old-school QuakeWorld tournament, three people desperately trying to make sure the gamers don't go hungry or soil themselves, and the Facilities manager weeping in the corner as the garbage piles high.

Doktor Howl

#26
April 04, 2019, 06:08:16 AM
Quote from: nullified on April 04, 2019, 05:51:44 AM
Ah.

This is the kind of thing we did before humor was invented.
Molon Lube

Doktor Howl

#27
April 04, 2019, 06:08:42 AM
But that is in fact where the expression "your turn in the barrel" comes from.
Molon Lube

altered

#28
April 04, 2019, 06:14:30 AM
Oh, I believe you. I just don't have much to reply to that with, because it answers every question I might have had and is not offensive, boring, hilarious, or stupid enough to demand more from me.

It is probably the first time in a year that I have had no emotional reaction to something I read at all. I'm not sure if that say more about me or old people, but I'm okay with a complete lack of reaction to new information. I need less excitement.
"I am that worst of all type of criminal...I cannot bring myself to do what you tell me, because you told me."

There's over 100 of us in this meat-suit. You'd think it runs like a ship, but it's more like a hundred and ten angry ghosts having an old-school QuakeWorld tournament, three people desperately trying to make sure the gamers don't go hungry or soil themselves, and the Facilities manager weeping in the corner as the garbage piles high.

Fujikoma

#29
April 04, 2019, 06:16:04 AM
AHAHAHA! OMFG, yeah, that's good. "Why not friday?" "Because that's your day in the barrel."
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