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For my part, I've replaced optimism and believing the best of people by default with a grin and the absolute 100% certainty that if they cannot find a pig to fuck, they will buy some bacon and play oinking noises on YouTube.

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Millions of Screaming Yahoos, #19: Goth Fight

Started by The Good Reverend Roger, December 06, 2005, 03:33:43 AM

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The Good Reverend Roger

December 06, 2005, 03:33:43 AM
It was the last perfect day of the season, and we were determined to enjoy it.  The Judge & Amy, and Maria and I had spent the morning shooting, and Amy had done very well...her marksmanship was coming along nicely.  

We decided to celebrate by having some frou-frou coffee at the local bistro (Amy's idea), and had just sat down at a table near some Goth-y high school kids, when the fun began.

An emo boi apparenty took issue with the musical opinions of one of the Goth girls, and called her a bitch.  He then tried to slap her.

Maria sat up a little straighter, but did nothing.  The Goth chick, however, was a different story.  She punched the emo boy in the face twice, and then raked his face with her "nails" ("talons" might be more accurate) hard enough to draw blood.

She apparently tagged his eye(s), as well, because the emo boi started running in circles, screaming "MY EYES!  MY EYES!  THE WHOLE WORLD IS AGAINST ME!  MY EYES!"

We all sat stock-still for about 2 seconds...and then Maria was the first to crack.  She sprayed latte all over me, as I began to laugh and swallow at the same time.  I began to choke, but still couldn't stop laughing.  As I slid off my chair, I saw Amy jet twin streams of her drink out of her nose.  Then I hit the ground, paralyzed with laughter.

We were still giggling, 5 minutes later, as we piled into the jeep, and drove Amy and the Judge back to Tombstone.  And the Rolling Stones were on the radio.  

As I said, a perfect day.  

It is, in fact, days like this that make life worth living.  Kinda like going to heaven.  For a precious few hours, you can forget work, you can forget that your country is run by an idiot, that people are dumber every year...you can forget traffic jams and bill collectors and preachers and telemarketers and the possibility that hideous things slither in the sewers beneath your feet.  You can forget lawyers and writs and...

hehe...whoops.  I started off talking about heaven, and somehow got sidetracked into talking about hell.  I guess that's my cue.

Or kill me.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

BADGE OF HONOR

#1
December 06, 2005, 03:39:47 AM
Quote"MY EYES! MY EYES! THE WHOLE WORLD IS AGAINST ME! MY EYES!"
:lol:
The Jerk On Bike rolled his eyes and tossed the waffle back over his shoulder--before it struck the ground, a stout, disconcertingly monkey-like dog sprang into the air and snatched it, and began to masticate it--literally--for the sound it made was like a homonculus squatting on the floor muttering "masticate masticate masticate".

The Good Reverend Roger

#2
December 06, 2005, 03:48:50 AM
Quote from: Rabid Badger of God
Quote"MY EYES! MY EYES! THE WHOLE WORLD IS AGAINST ME! MY EYES!"
:lol:

You can see why I almost asphyxiated on coffee. :lol:
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Fredfredly ⊂(◉‿◉)つ

#3
December 06, 2005, 03:49:20 AM
:lol:  :lol:  :lol:  :lol:  :lol:
lovely

The Good Reverend Roger

#4
December 06, 2005, 03:54:02 AM
Quote from: mian tiao Fred:lol:  :lol:  :lol:  :lol:  :lol:
lovely

thx!
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Chlorine

#5
December 06, 2005, 05:08:32 AM
Yes.

The Good Reverend Roger

#6
December 06, 2005, 05:10:11 AM
Quote from: ChlorineYes.

Yes, you'll kill me?

TGRR,
Has almost given up hope.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Chlorine

#7
December 06, 2005, 05:19:53 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger
Quote from: ChlorineYes.

Yes, you'll kill me?

TGRR,
Has almost given up hope.
Perhaps.

I was yessing about the described events, which were very...Yes.

The Good Reverend Roger

#8
December 06, 2005, 05:20:35 AM
Quote from: Chlorine
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger
Quote from: ChlorineYes.

Yes, you'll kill me?

TGRR,
Has almost given up hope.
Perhaps.

I was yessing about the described events, which were very...Yes.

Very hello, as BGP would say. :lol:

TGRR,
Still giggling.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Cain

#9
December 06, 2005, 10:26:14 AM
This worries me, as I think I wont be able to stop laughing soon.  After my infiltration of the Conservative Party, I've decided to go totally in the opposite direction, with the tree-huggers crowd who live in the local coffe shops and are mostly emo-ish.  Laughing at people =/= making friends easily.

The seer

#10
December 06, 2005, 05:09:18 PM
It's not so bad man, it's just that you enjoy life too much to act like a dipshit.

The last time I said anything like that I was 8.

The seer: ACTUALLY grew up.

Cain

#11
December 06, 2005, 05:11:04 PM
Its going to be interesting, thats for sure *gone to fetch my mascara and straight razor*

hooplala

#12
December 06, 2005, 05:19:34 PM
What possesses people to dress like the Addam's Family anyway?
"Soon all of us will have special names" — Professor Brian O'Blivion

"Now's not the time to get silly, so wear your big boots and jump on the garbage clowns." — Bob Dylan?

"Do I contradict myself?
Very well then I contradict myself,
(I am large, I contain multitudes.)" — Walt Whitman

The seer

#13
December 06, 2005, 05:20:32 PM
Quote from: Baron von HooplaWhat possesses people to dress like the Addam's Family anyway?

I'm gonna go out on a limb here and say it's not the same reason people dress up like spock and hang around at convention halls.  :lol:

hooplala

#14
December 06, 2005, 05:25:28 PM
Well at the very least MOST of those people know there is a certain time for dress such as that.  The goths walk around like that every freaking day.

I take the subway with a guy who is about 6' 8" tall, and must weigh in at about 70lbs soaking wet.  He has long straight black hair, and wears five inch platform boots.  Leather pants with buckles the whole way up, gloves, nail polish and lipstick.

I'm all for anyone wearing whatever they want, but don't think I won't laugh.
"Soon all of us will have special names" — Professor Brian O'Blivion

"Now's not the time to get silly, so wear your big boots and jump on the garbage clowns." — Bob Dylan?

"Do I contradict myself?
Very well then I contradict myself,
(I am large, I contain multitudes.)" — Walt Whitman
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