Limericks

[AFK]

There was an old lady from Calais
Who lived in a big palace
She fancied a beau
Who lived down below
And now he is taking Cialis

[Cramulus]

There once was a man from the sticks
who liked to write limericks
but he wrote them too short

[LMNO]

There once was a man from Peru,
Whose limericks stopped at line two.

[Cramulus]

There was a lazy bastard named Cramulus

[LMNO]

THERE ONCE WAS.

[AFK]

There once was a guy named LMNO
He was a very nice fellow
He loves the reverbs
But to many it disturbs
Especially when he says hello-lo-lo-lo-lo

[AFK]

There once was a Prof named Cramulus
Dressed in tweed and teaches Calculus
He is prone to spasms
Especially when he GASMs
Ew, Cram you Damnulus! 

[Cramulus]

There once was a lady from Bude
Who went swimming one day in the lake.
A man in a punt
Stuck his pole in the water
And said "You can't swim here -- it's private."

[Bebek Sincap Ratatosk]

There once was a limerick writer
who was prone to pull an all nighter
He got to line four
then he started to snore
Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

[Cramulus]

There was a young girl who begat

Three triplets named Nat, Pat and Tat.

     ‘twas  fun in the breeding

     But hell in the feeding,

There wasn’t a spare tit for tat.

[Suu]

There once was a man from Nantucket,
who kept all his cash in a bucket.
He had a daughter named Nan
who ran off with a man,
and that was the end of the bucket, Nantucket.




....I'm sorry, were you were expecting some OTHER version of that?

[Bebek Sincap Ratatosk]

I *hic* wonder whence limericks come,
when they're spilling out *hic* over my tongue.
Are the rhymes from my brain *hic*
or would they *hic* still sound the same
if I hadn't have had so much Rum?!
*hic*

[Bebek Sincap Ratatosk]

Anonymous once was a coward,
A chattering fool, Slashdot powered
But now that he's grown,
Scientologists moan,
For with Hot Grits they've all been deflowered!




*note: Anonymous Coward was first used as a posting ID on Slashdot, where trolls often talked about pouring Hot Grits down people's pants.

[Bebek Sincap Ratatosk]

Eight Circuits define who we are,
But then, so does a Black Prison Bar,
Each is a map,
and each is a trap,
if we take the model too far!

[Cramulus]

A lusty young woodsman of Maine
For years with no woman had lain,
     But he found sublimation
     At a high elevation
In the crotch of a pine---God, the pain!