BP discovers new species of marine mammal.

[Sir Squid Diddimus]

Wait, so, they shouldn't have done any testing or research or even called some nerds or the fucking myth busters at least?
Just spill some oil then try to clean it up?

Huh????

The only technique of theirs that has advanced is the fucking deeper drilling. Not how to cap it or stop it or at least drill some relief wells with it to kill it "just in case"...

I'm not sure what you're getting at.
I mean, if I were to build a car I'd need to figure out how to make it stop as well as go. Right?

[Requia ☣]

Er, no.  Clearly they don't know what their doing down there.  But even if they had been spending huge amounts of resources on figuring out what to do in this kind of scenario, they couldn't have tested any of them at this depth until now.

[P3nT4gR4m]

Wait, so, they shouldn't have done any testing or research or even called some nerds or the fucking myth busters at least?
Just spill some oil then try to clean it up?

Huh????

The only technique of theirs that has advanced is the fucking deeper drilling. Not how to cap it or stop it or at least drill some relief wells with it to kill it "just in case"...

I'm not sure what you're getting at.
I mean, if I were to build a car I'd need to figure out how to make it stop as well as go. Right?

Stop? What the hell are you talking about, this car will run for evar - we'll all be rich. Who the hell would want something like that to stop? Forget about tomorrow, there's no such thing. We're making a metric fuckton of money today. Just look at the happy smiling faces of the shareholders if you don't believe me. Don't worry about the edge of that cliff, it's miles away, anyway we have a contingency plan - we're kinda hoping the car will sprout wings and fly. Don't you feel safer already?

[Kai]

Er, no.  Clearly they don't know what their doing down there.  But even if they had been spending huge amounts of resources on figuring out what to do in this kind of scenario, they couldn't have tested any of them at this depth until now.

HEADLINE: INDUSTRY DON'T KNOA WTF THEY DOIN.

[Sir Squid Diddimus]

Er, no.  Clearly they don't know what their doing down there.  But even if they had been spending huge amounts of resources on figuring out what to do in this kind of scenario, they couldn't have tested any of them at this depth until now.

Sure they couldn't have tested things at that depth, but dude, we can build rockets and shoot men up into space, I'm certain we have science to help figure these things out.
I mean, how did we know it was a vacuum up there?
It just sounds so ridiculously retarded to me that they couldn't use a little.. I dunno, MATH? Or something?

[Shibboleet The Annihilator]

The Gulf Coast Walrus, Odobenus mexicanus.

What, it doesn't exist, you say? And neither do the other experts in BP's Gulf of Mexico Response Plan?

http://www.csmonitor.com/From-the-news-wires/2010/0609/BP-s-gulf-oil-spill-response-plan-lists-the-walrus-as-a-local-species.-Louisiana-Gov.-Bobby-Jindal-is-furious?

Professor Peter Lutz is listed in BP's 2009 response plan for a Gulf of Mexico oil spill as a national wildlife expert. He died in 2005.


Under the heading "sensitive biological resources," the plan lists marine mammals including walruses, sea otters, sea lions and seals. None lives anywhere near the Gulf.

The names and phone numbers of several Texas A&M University marine life specialists are wrong. So are the numbers for marine mammal stranding network offices in Louisiana and Florida, which are no longer in service.

Oh well. Nothing we can do about that now, might as well chalk it up to an honest mistake.

Beyond Petroleum Fucked

[Cramulus]

from urbandictionary...

That's What BP Said
A variant of "that's what she said." Instead of referring to sexual connotations, it is used to refer to spending a lot of money, making a mess, or fucking up very badly. Arose after the 2010 BP oil leak in the Gulf of Mexico.

X: Oh man, I really screwed the pooch on that one.
Y: That's what BP said!

X: It's going to take me all day to clean this mess up.
Y: That's what BP said!

X: I'm paying tonight. The sky is the limit.
Y: That's what BP said!

[Sir Squid Diddimus]

appropriate I suppose

[Requia ☣]

Er, no.  Clearly they don't know what their doing down there.  But even if they had been spending huge amounts of resources on figuring out what to do in this kind of scenario, they couldn't have tested any of them at this depth until now.

Sure they couldn't have tested things at that depth, but dude, we can build rockets and shoot men up into space, I'm certain we have science to help figure these things out.
I mean, how did we know it was a vacuum up there?
It just sounds so ridiculously retarded to me that they couldn't use a little.. I dunno, MATH? Or something?

And the first time we sent a man into space would this woman have been bitching about how this has never been tested before with a human being?

My point is that she's spouting near tautologies.  There are plenty of valid criticisms to go around, that these things have never been tested at the depth isn't one of them, because that's fucking impossible without creating a spill like this on purpose, or waiting for one to actually happen.

[Juana]

Couldn't they have used computer simulations? If we can simulate hurricanes with all their variables, couldn't they have at least given that a shot?

[Doktor Howl]

Er, no.  Clearly they don't know what their doing down there.  But even if they had been spending huge amounts of resources on figuring out what to do in this kind of scenario, they couldn't have tested any of them at this depth until now.

Sure they couldn't have tested things at that depth, but dude, we can build rockets and shoot men up into space, I'm certain we have science to help figure these things out.
I mean, how did we know it was a vacuum up there?
It just sounds so ridiculously retarded to me that they couldn't use a little.. I dunno, MATH? Or something?

And the first time we sent a man into space would this woman have been bitching about how this has never been tested before with a human being?

My point is that she's spouting near tautologies.  There are plenty of valid criticisms to go around, that these things have never been tested at the depth isn't one of them, because that's fucking impossible without creating a spill like this on purpose, or waiting for one to actually happen.

Why do you do this?

[Requia ☣]

Couldn't they have used computer simulations? If we can simulate hurricanes with all their variables, couldn't they have at least given that a shot?

That's not the same as testing the methods at this depth.

Why do you do this?

Flawed logic is flawed logic, even if it leads to the conclusions I want.

[Juana]

Couldn't they have used computer simulations? If we can simulate hurricanes with all their variables, couldn't they have at least given that a shot?

That's not the same as testing the methods at this depth.

But that's the best that could have been done under IRL circumstances and testing via simulation would give them something, right? And something is better than nothing. I'd rather be unhappy that their simulation was wrong than that no testing of any kind was done.

[Requia ☣]

Couldn't they have used computer simulations? If we can simulate hurricanes with all their variables, couldn't they have at least given that a shot?

That's not the same as testing the methods at this depth.

But that's the best that could have been done under IRL circumstances

That's my point, nothing that could have been done in the last 30 years (except you know, not spilling a million barrels of oil into the ocean in the first place), would be able to deflect a criticism that it had never actually been tried before at the depth.

[Kai]

Hey, REQUIA! Your logic is ruining our Hate on Industrial Humanity^TM thread.