Terrible Ideas that sound awesome

[Jasper]

I am often arrested with gripping visions of things that, in the moment, I am sure are the most excellent thing possible.  Later I rediscover the notes of these ideas scrawled into paper pads and backs of envelopes, and realize that they are only awesome if you abuse drugs.  I will post some of them here, feel free to post yours.

Metal Skeleton Metal:

A genre of metal that is so damned metal that it can only be properly performed by animated skeletons made of steel.

[Jasper]

A rideable robotic t-rex.  Its saddle is actually a cleverly contrived sex apparatus so that I may ride whilst I ride.  There would also be a costume for riding the robotic rex, which includes a crotchless spacesuit and a cape.

[Salty]

Minerature elephants and giraffes as pets. They'd be about knee or thigh high. The problem, of course, is strays. Who wants to put down a l'il giraffe?

[Jasper]

If I had robotic workers at my command, I would make them run guns and drugs for me.  They would use the money and surplus weapons to create a gigantic concrete cube in the middle of the south, where there is nothing but harsh wastes.  This vast cube would house a maze filled with deadly traps, fabulous riches, and CCTV cameras.  The robots would stalk the halls slaying intruders, entertaining untold millions with endless spectacles of greed and violence on live television.  Eventually, perhaps quickly, it would be taken off the air when the violence was discovered to be real, and I would give away a live video stream of it over the internet.  The cube would remain open, and greater riches would fill the chambers attracting ever more to the challenge.  Of course a series of unfair Gygaxian traps would protect the truly valuable loot.  Eventually its politically polarizing influence would assist in causing the next world war, and the fall of mankind.  Over time however, tribes would reemerge, although primitive.  They would one day find my cube, and be driven out by what they could only imagine are demons or gods.  An emissary from these demons would come to them, offering vast riches and magicks in exchange for their reverence to the one true god, Felix.  They would be invited inside, shown my place of burial, and would show obeisance to me with great prose and rituals of worship.  The death cube would form the basis for their creation myth, and the robots would last on as the adepts of my faith.

[NotPublished]

A robot that feels pain?

[rong]

american idol

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

A robot that feels pain?

Isn't that what we are?

[Freeky]

If I had robotic workers at my command, I would make them run guns and drugs for me.  They would use the money and surplus weapons to create a gigantic concrete cube in the middle of the south, where there is nothing but harsh wastes.  This vast cube would house a maze filled with deadly traps, fabulous riches, and CCTV cameras.  The robots would stalk the halls slaying intruders, entertaining untold millions with endless spectacles of greed and violence on live television.  Eventually, perhaps quickly, it would be taken off the air when the violence was discovered to be real, and I would give away a live video stream of it over the internet.  The cube would remain open, and greater riches would fill the chambers attracting ever more to the challenge.  Of course a series of unfair Gygaxian traps would protect the truly valuable loot.  Eventually its politically polarizing influence would assist in causing the next world war, and the fall of mankind.  Over time however, tribes would reemerge, although primitive.  They would one day find my cube, and be driven out by what they could only imagine are demons or gods.  An emissary from these demons would come to them, offering vast riches and magicks in exchange for their reverence to the one true god, Felix.  They would be invited inside, shown my place of burial, and would show obeisance to me with great prose and rituals of worship.  The death cube would form the basis for their creation myth, and the robots would last on as the adepts of my faith.

How can this be an idea of FAIL? SELL THIS IDEA TO YOUR LOCAL TV STATION! MAKE MILLIONS! NAO!

[East Coast Hustle]

Felix, these are some of the most brilliant ideas I've ever seen.

Especially the metal skeleton metal.

ECH,
not currently abusing (many) drugs

[Jasper]

If I had robotic workers at my command, I would make them run guns and drugs for me.  They would use the money and surplus weapons to create a gigantic concrete cube in the middle of the south, where there is nothing but harsh wastes.  This vast cube would house a maze filled with deadly traps, fabulous riches, and CCTV cameras.  The robots would stalk the halls slaying intruders, entertaining untold millions with endless spectacles of greed and violence on live television.  Eventually, perhaps quickly, it would be taken off the air when the violence was discovered to be real, and I would give away a live video stream of it over the internet.  The cube would remain open, and greater riches would fill the chambers attracting ever more to the challenge.  Of course a series of unfair Gygaxian traps would protect the truly valuable loot.  Eventually its politically polarizing influence would assist in causing the next world war, and the fall of mankind.  Over time however, tribes would reemerge, although primitive.  They would one day find my cube, and be driven out by what they could only imagine are demons or gods.  An emissary from these demons would come to them, offering vast riches and magicks in exchange for their reverence to the one true god, Felix.  They would be invited inside, shown my place of burial, and would show obeisance to me with great prose and rituals of worship.  The death cube would form the basis for their creation myth, and the robots would last on as the adepts of my faith.

How can this be an idea of FAIL? SELL THIS IDEA TO YOUR LOCAL TV STATION! MAKE MILLIONS! NAO!

That was actually part of an idea I had to write a novel about this guy who invents robotic workers, gives 20 of them to everybody who helped him in his life, and sets his own robot free.  The book tells the story of each of these people, but they each die at some point near the end of their little tales, of mysterious causes.  Near the end it becomes clear that the freed robot has been killing these people and freeing the robots, leading a heroic robot rights movement behind the scenes of the story all along.

[Richter]

Gun Control
Censorship
Affirmative Action
Eugenics
"Less Lethal" weapons

[Dysnomia]

"well if it's for the children..."

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

"well if it's for the children..."

This. LOL.

[-Kel-]

This has been done by friends....

Skateboard off the roof of a second story house
Wheel barrow off the same roof
Send a car in neutral down a busy residential hill

I'd like to play shipmast, but only with a 1964 Dodge Challenge painted white with a 440 engine.

[President Television]

Step 1: Legally change name to "Ra-Ra-Rasputin, Russia's Greatest Love Machine"

Step 2: Get arrested.

Step 3: Laugh as judge is forced to read your new legal name aloud in court.