Author Topic: Maria's Brag (as dictated to her loyal scribe):  (Read 5932 times)

The Good Reverend Roger

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Maria's Brag (as dictated to her loyal scribe):
« on: December 28, 2006, 07:29:13 am »
Note:  Maria doesn't believe in the internets, but she is a ranter of epic proportions.  I give you The Brag of the UberYetiEss:

HEY, STICKBOY!  I am the uberwoman!  My ovaries are full of ball bearings and my tampons are radioactive!  I shit concertina wire, my vibrator has a kickstart, and I go drinking with Themis and Columbia!  My boogers are made of stainless steel!  You better stand back, little man, because I'm a dead shot and a live wire, with ass-penetrating boots!  I use mascara on all 3 eyes, and I have no king but Elvis!  My legs are 3 miles long, and I can slam a revolving door!  I drink whiskey and puke kerosene!  I got busted by DHS and copped a feel!  YOU CAN RUN, BUT YOU'LL ONLY DIE TIRED!

YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAW!
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

 "Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Hangero

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Re: Maria's Brag (as dictated to her loyal scribe):
« Reply #1 on: December 28, 2006, 08:40:48 am »
That would make a hell of a Personal Section message.

I'd respond to it.

The Good Reverend Roger

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Re: Maria's Brag (as dictated to her loyal scribe):
« Reply #2 on: December 28, 2006, 08:41:52 am »
That would make a hell of a Personal Section message.

I'd respond to it.

Yeah, but I'd have to kill you.  :lol:
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

 "Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Hangero

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Re: Maria's Brag (as dictated to her loyal scribe):
« Reply #3 on: December 28, 2006, 08:46:49 am »
You might have to beat her to it.
I hope that doesn't make it a three way.

The Good Reverend Roger

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Re: Maria's Brag (as dictated to her loyal scribe):
« Reply #4 on: December 28, 2006, 08:53:38 am »
You might have to beat her to it.
I hope that doesn't make it a three way.

We're pretty broad-minded.

We don't care who we kill, or whether anyone gets off.  Well, except for that one dude.  But he puked all over our BIG RED STRAPS, and that killed the mood.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

 "Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

vexaph0d

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Re: Maria's Brag (as dictated to her loyal scribe):
« Reply #5 on: December 28, 2006, 05:38:40 pm »
Note:  Maria doesn't believe in the internets, but she is a ranter of epic proportions.  I give you The Brag of the UberYetiEss:

HEY, STICKBOY!  I am the uberwoman!  My ovaries are full of ball bearings and my tampons are radioactive!  I shit concertina wire, my vibrator has a kickstart, and I go drinking with Themis and Columbia!  My boogers are made of stainless steel!  You better stand back, little man, because I'm a dead shot and a live wire, with ass-penetrating boots!  I use mascara on all 3 eyes, and I have no king but Elvis!  My legs are 3 miles long, and I can slam a revolving door!  I drink whiskey and puke kerosene!  I got busted by DHS and copped a feel!  YOU CAN RUN, BUT YOU'LL ONLY DIE TIRED!

YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAW!

can i have maria when you're done with her?
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The Good Reverend Roger

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Re: Maria's Brag (as dictated to her loyal scribe):
« Reply #6 on: December 28, 2006, 05:39:38 pm »
Note: Maria doesn't believe in the internets, but she is a ranter of epic proportions. I give you The Brag of the UberYetiEss:

HEY, STICKBOY! I am the uberwoman! My ovaries are full of ball bearings and my tampons are radioactive! I shit concertina wire, my vibrator has a kickstart, and I go drinking with Themis and Columbia! My boogers are made of stainless steel! You better stand back, little man, because I'm a dead shot and a live wire, with ass-penetrating boots! I use mascara on all 3 eyes, and I have no king but Elvis! My legs are 3 miles long, and I can slam a revolving door! I drink whiskey and puke kerosene! I got busted by DHS and copped a feel! YOU CAN RUN, BUT YOU'LL ONLY DIE TIRED!

YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAW!

can i have maria when you're done with her?

Um...no.

Get your own.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

 "Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

LHX

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Re: Maria's Brag (as dictated to her loyal scribe):
« Reply #7 on: December 28, 2006, 06:14:43 pm »
holy fuck
neat hell

Jasper

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Re: Maria's Brag (as dictated to her loyal scribe):
« Reply #8 on: December 29, 2006, 06:18:48 am »
LHX!  I can't get on to MSN, but I'll say it ITT because it's at least a bit relevant:

I saw 'Hero' a few days ago, and it ocurred to me how scary a female samurai would really be.

That's pretty much it.  Good movie.

B_M_W

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Re: Maria's Brag (as dictated to her loyal scribe):
« Reply #9 on: December 29, 2006, 04:07:27 pm »
LHX!  I can't get on to MSN, but I'll say it ITT because it's at least a bit relevant:

I saw 'Hero' a few days ago, and it ocurred to me how scary a female samurai would really be.

That's pretty much it.  Good movie.

Fuck yeah. The kind of person you would NEVER want to cross.

Maria is in the same boat.
One by one, we break the sheep from their Iron Bar Prisons and expand their imaginations, make them think for themselves. In turn, they break more from their prisons. Eventually, critical mass is reached. Our key word: Resolve. Evangelize with compassion and determination. And realize that there will be few in the beginning. We are hand picking our successors. They are the future of Discordianism. Let us guide our future with intelligence.

     --Reverse Brainwashing: A Guide http://www.principiadiscordia.com/forum/index.php?topic=9801.0


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Proxy

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Re: Maria's Brag (as dictated to her loyal scribe):
« Reply #10 on: January 02, 2007, 11:37:32 pm »
Note:  Maria doesn't believe in the internets, but she is a ranter of epic proportions.  I give you The Brag of the UberYetiEss:

HEY, STICKBOY!  I am the uberwoman!  My ovaries are full of ball bearings and my tampons are radioactive!  I shit concertina wire, my vibrator has a kickstart, and I go drinking with Themis and Columbia!  My boogers are made of stainless steel!  You better stand back, little man, because I'm a dead shot and a live wire, with ass-penetrating boots!  I use mascara on all 3 eyes, and I have no king but Elvis!  My legs are 3 miles long, and I can slam a revolving door!  I drink whiskey and puke kerosene!  I got busted by DHS and copped a feel!  YOU CAN RUN, BUT YOU'LL ONLY DIE TIRED!

YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAW!

That's good... she's certainly got character. :)

Doktor Howl

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Re: Maria's Brag (as dictated to her loyal scribe):
« Reply #11 on: February 18, 2010, 06:43:50 pm »
Note:  Maria doesn't believe in the internets, but she is a ranter of epic proportions.  I give you The Brag of the UberYetiEss:

HEY, STICKBOY!  I am the uberwoman!  My ovaries are full of ball bearings and my tampons are radioactive!  I shit concertina wire, my vibrator has a kickstart, and I go drinking with Themis and Columbia!  My boogers are made of stainless steel!  You better stand back, little man, because I'm a dead shot and a live wire, with ass-penetrating boots!  I use mascara on all 3 eyes, and I have no king but Elvis!  My legs are 3 miles long, and I can slam a revolving door!  I drink whiskey and puke kerosene!  I got busted by DHS and copped a feel!  YOU CAN RUN, BUT YOU'LL ONLY DIE TIRED!

YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAW!

Bump for teh Maria.   :lulz:  <--- Gonna DIE!
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Jenne

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Re: Maria's Brag (as dictated to her loyal scribe):
« Reply #12 on: February 24, 2010, 08:20:15 pm »
:lulz:  Niiice.  :D

Doktor Howl

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Re: Maria's Brag (as dictated to her loyal scribe):
« Reply #13 on: February 24, 2010, 09:24:12 pm »
:lulz:  Niiice.  :D

She was reading the old brag thread while drunk on Rum.   :lulz:
"It's how we roll,
Dunning-Krueger out of control
(Girl, look at that gross margin)"
- TGRR

Evil doesn't work without good people. Good people will do the most repugnant, nasty shit for what they think are "the right reasons"

Jenne

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Re: Maria's Brag (as dictated to her loyal scribe):
« Reply #14 on: February 24, 2010, 09:25:46 pm »
:lulz:  Niiice.  :D

She was reading the old brag thread while drunk on Rum.   :lulz:

I do not know this thread.  Is it still kickin?