Author Topic: Ask Bella  (Read 203429 times)

Bella

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« Reply #795 on: June 15, 2004, 06:37:01 am »
Clowns?!?! :shock:

First of all, one should avoid the circus at all costs.

If one absolutely must attend circus and is attacked by clowns,  then of course it's best to go for the juggler.
 Rip their little clown throats out. Slice and dice them. Wring them out and hang them up to dry.
Stomp them into dust and feed them to the elephants.

I hate to come across as a violent person, but when dealing with clowns, ettiquette is a luxury one cannot afford.
just like in a dream
you'll open your mouth to scream
and you won't make a sound

you can't believe your eyes
you can't believe your ears
you can't believe your friends
you can't believe you're here

The Good Reverend Roger

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« Reply #796 on: June 15, 2004, 06:56:35 am »
Quote from: Some Guy
Dear Bella,

If one was at the circus and was attacked by the clowns, would it be best to go for the juggler?

Unsure about clown ettiquette.



" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

 "Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Den Sorte Dragen

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« Reply #797 on: June 15, 2004, 10:46:50 am »
Quote from: Malaul
:roll:  :roll:  :roll:


OMG


thats was TERRIBLE!!!


someone punish this guy!!!


it wasn¬Ąt me
negative....negative.....negative................;type O negative................negative............;negative

Guido Finucci

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« Reply #798 on: June 15, 2004, 11:21:04 am »
Quote from: Den Sorte Dragen
it wasn¬Ąt me


How do you know it wasn't you? You're the kind of guy that'd want it to be you.

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« Reply #799 on: June 15, 2004, 03:38:43 pm »
Quote from: Some Guy
Quote from: Den Sorte Dragen
it wasn¬Ąt me


How do you know it wasn't you? You're the kind of guy that'd want it to be you.


ask Malaul
negative....negative.....negative................;type O negative................negative............;negative

Malaul

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« Reply #800 on: June 15, 2004, 04:48:33 pm »
Quote from: Den Sorte Dragen
Quote from: Some Guy
Quote from: Den Sorte Dragen
it wasn¬Ąt me


How do you know it wasn't you? You're the kind of guy that'd want it to be you.


ask Malaul
actually, I was thinking the same thing, you know youde love to be punished!!! Even if it WASTN something you did   :twisted:  :twisted:  :twisted:
Coito ergo sum
O! Plus! Perge! Aio! Hui! Hem!
"You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy,the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold the America's Cup, France is accusing the U.S. of arrogance, Germany doesn't want to go to war, and the three most powerful men in America are named Bush, Dick, and Colon.  --Comedian Chris Rock

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« Reply #801 on: June 15, 2004, 06:55:27 pm »
Quote from: Malaul
Quote from: Den Sorte Dragen
Quote from: Some Guy
Quote from: Den Sorte Dragen
it wasn¬Ąt me


How do you know it wasn't you? You're the kind of guy that'd want it to be you.


ask Malaul
actually, I was thinking the same thing, you know youde love to be punished!!! Even if it WASTN something you did   :twisted:  :twisted:  :twisted:


i didn¬Ąt ....i swear....make me confess if you like  :wink:
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Bella

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« Reply #802 on: June 15, 2004, 06:56:17 pm »
Yeah, Malaul......make him confess.


I dare you. :twisted:
just like in a dream
you'll open your mouth to scream
and you won't make a sound

you can't believe your eyes
you can't believe your ears
you can't believe your friends
you can't believe you're here

slothrop23

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« Reply #803 on: June 16, 2004, 01:27:27 pm »
dear bella, i seem to have had my eyes poked out, and the sockets damaged, is there anything i can do to make people think there is nothing wrong with me. i ve tried glasses, ive tried being in a boy band, ive tried passing myself off as hulk hogan. please help
Wind turbines.

I'm a big fan

Bella

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« Reply #804 on: June 16, 2004, 02:24:12 pm »
Quote from: slothrop23
dear bella, i seem to have had my eyes poked out, and the sockets damaged, is there anything i can do to make people think there is nothing wrong with me. i ve tried glasses, ive tried being in a boy band, ive tried passing myself off as hulk hogan. please help

Dear Slothrop,

You've had your poor eyes poked out? How sad.
It sure sounds like you've tried all the conventional methods for healing.
I can't quite believe none of them have worked for you.

In this case, it's obviously going to take extreme measures to fix you up.
You're either going to have to get yourself some of those glasses with the googly eyes or try some serious reiki healing.
I recommend both, actually.

PS: you really have to stop playing knifey/spooney, okay?
just like in a dream
you'll open your mouth to scream
and you won't make a sound

you can't believe your eyes
you can't believe your ears
you can't believe your friends
you can't believe you're here

The Good Reverend Roger

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« Reply #805 on: June 16, 2004, 08:22:24 pm »
Quote from: SssBella, Oracle of Doom
Quote from: slothrop23
dear bella, i seem to have had my eyes poked out, and the sockets damaged, is there anything i can do to make people think there is nothing wrong with me. i ve tried glasses, ive tried being in a boy band, ive tried passing myself off as hulk hogan. please help

Dear Slothrop,

You've had your poor eyes poked out? How sad.
It sure sounds like you've tried all the conventional methods for healing.
I can't quite believe none of them have worked for you.

In this case, it's obviously going to take extreme measures to fix you up.
You're either going to have to get yourself some of those glasses with the googly eyes or try some serious reiki healing.
I recommend both, actually.

PS: you really have to stop playing knifey/spooney, okay?


I think we've still got some eyeballs left in the jar.

Might not have MATCHING ones, though.

Rev Roger,
Should never have told Efrim that they were pickled eggs.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

 "Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Bella

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« Reply #806 on: June 16, 2004, 08:27:24 pm »
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger
Quote from: SssBella, Oracle of Doom
Quote from: slothrop23
dear bella, i seem to have had my eyes poked out, and the sockets damaged, is there anything i can do to make people think there is nothing wrong with me. i ve tried glasses, ive tried being in a boy band, ive tried passing myself off as hulk hogan. please help

Dear Slothrop,

You've had your poor eyes poked out? How sad.
It sure sounds like you've tried all the conventional methods for healing.
I can't quite believe none of them have worked for you.

In this case, it's obviously going to take extreme measures to fix you up.
You're either going to have to get yourself some of those glasses with the googly eyes or try some serious reiki healing.
I recommend both, actually.

PS: you really have to stop playing knifey/spooney, okay?


I think we've still got some eyeballs left in the jar.

Might not have MATCHING ones, though.

Rev Roger,
Should never have told Efrim that they were pickled eggs.

That was downright evil of you, Rev. Shame on you.  :twisted:

I say dig them out and we'll give him the closest matches you're able to come up with.
Hell, if different colored eyes are good enough for David Bowie, then they're good enough for slothrop.
just like in a dream
you'll open your mouth to scream
and you won't make a sound

you can't believe your eyes
you can't believe your ears
you can't believe your friends
you can't believe you're here

The Good Reverend Roger

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« Reply #807 on: June 16, 2004, 08:36:00 pm »
Dear Bella:  The John Wayne Rant keeps bouncing around in my head, getting bigger and bigger, and the fucking thing won't come out.  I now have a dented out forehead, radiation burns, and strange growths on my neck.

Either this one's gonna be a doozy, or my head will explode like in the movie Scanners.  Either way, I'm happy...BUT:

Is it polite to have your head detonate in public?
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

 "Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Bella

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« Reply #808 on: June 16, 2004, 08:42:17 pm »
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger
Dear Bella:  The John Wayne Rant keeps bouncing around in my head, getting bigger and bigger, and the fucking thing won't come out.  I now have a dented out forehead, radiation burns, and strange growths on my neck.

Either this one's gonna be a doozy, or my head will explode like in the movie Scanners.  Either way, I'm happy...BUT:

Is it polite to have your head detonate in public?

Dear Roger,

Not really, but at this point you have bigger things to worry about than being polite.

We gotta get that rant out somehow.
Have you tried dictating it to someone instead of trying to type it out?
My friend dictated her latest channeling session to me today and she said it was a lot easier that way.
just like in a dream
you'll open your mouth to scream
and you won't make a sound

you can't believe your eyes
you can't believe your ears
you can't believe your friends
you can't believe you're here

The Good Reverend Roger

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« Reply #809 on: June 16, 2004, 08:46:28 pm »
Quote from: SssBella, Oracle of Doom
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger
Dear Bella:  The John Wayne Rant keeps bouncing around in my head, getting bigger and bigger, and the fucking thing won't come out.  I now have a dented out forehead, radiation burns, and strange growths on my neck.

Either this one's gonna be a doozy, or my head will explode like in the movie Scanners.  Either way, I'm happy...BUT:

Is it polite to have your head detonate in public?

Dear Roger,

Not really, but at this point you have bigger things to worry about than being polite.

We gotta get that rant out somehow.
Have you tried dictating it to someone instead of trying to type it out?
My friend dictated her latest channeling session to me today and she said it was a lot easier that way.


Nope.  When it's ready, it will come out.  I hope.

Of course, there's always the chance that it will come out like in the movie Alien, but that's the risk you take as a Mad Prophet(tm).
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

 "Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.