Rev Roger, MSY35: Horrible Bastards

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Here in the Badlands, we have many Good People.  You know them...they have 2.5 kids, a bright shiny car, they were voted most likely to succeed, yada yada.  They do wholesome family things on weekends and vacations (camping, fishing, church, etc), and only beat their families in the privacy of their own homes.  They voted for proposition 8, not because they hate homosexuals (that's SO 1980), but to "preserve the definition of marriage" (Which is something else, altogether.  No, really.).

But their ways are not my ways.

No, with the relocation of Sister Gothique, I am the last Horrible Bastard in Tucson.  Like the last of the Mohicans, I alone man the barricades against The Good People and all the horrors they stand for.  It's a heavy burden, having to single-handedly "upper deck" the toilet at the PTA meeting, or puke up 9 cappuccinos at the Pentacostal picnic and revival.  If I didn't know that my fellow Horrible Bastards were out there (Cain, ECH, etc), I'd have given up long before now.

Are YOU a Horrible Bastard?  Do you have what it takes?  Are you YETI enough to PUNISH the humans?  Whether you're Cain, making life miserable for God-fearing British nationalists; or ECH, "accidentally" knocking tourists off the restaurant wharf into 40F water, it is your DUTY to teach the Good People a lesson they'll never forget.   

After all, it isn't us Horrible Bastards that have made such a mess of the world, is it?  No, it was the Good People who vote for very un-Godly people who CLAIM to be Godly, because they're in the "conservative" party (AND WE ALL KNOW JESUS HATES FAGS AND MUSLIMS, RIGHT?)...Who then blame "liberals" for all the fuck-ups the people they voted for commit.  They still believe that the GOP is conservative, that democrats are liberals, and that America is still great, simply by virtue of being America.  Of course, these same people would have the founders sent to Gitmo for being dangerous radicals, given a time machine and a pistol to whip Jefferson with.

No, THEY did it, and you have every right - nay, an obligation - to brutally chastise them for it.  After all, when the Great Scorer writes your name on the board, do you want to go down as a "good German" who stood by while these jackasses "redecorated" the free world?  You might not STOP them, but you can at least be able to KNEEL TALL in your tiger cage and tell your fellow inmates "I HIT THOSE FUCKERS IN THE NADS!  IN THE NADS!"

Think about it.  99% of what you do for "fun" these days is designed simply to keep you busy until you die.  Neat, isn't it?  Just roll that thought around in your head for a little while, and then pretend it doesn't apply to you, as you log off to go play another 50 straight hours or World of Warcraft, drink yourself silly, or both.  And when you come right down to it, you really haven't got a lot of time to waste, do you?  One moment you're 18 and you own the world, the next you're 40, older and uglier, with the full knowledge that you have to make what's left of your body last another 35 years or so.

So what the HELL are you waiting for?  Why are you reading this, instead of GETTING YOUR MUTANT ON, at the expense of the Good People around you?  GET OFF YOUR ASS! 

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

HORRIBLE BASTARDISM:  IT ISN'T A JOB, IT'S MANKIND'S LAST HOPE!

Or Kill Me. 

[Payne]

I'm liking the hate in this Roger.

My own has been weak and ineffectual lately. I need to do something to sort that shit out, god damn.

If I could, I would actually come to Tucson to fight the good fight, seriously.

[Kai]

Payne: Fight the good fight where you are.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

I'm liking the hate in this Roger.

My own has been weak and ineffectual lately. I need to do something to sort that shit out, god damn.

If I could, I would actually come to Tucson to fight the good fight, seriously.

I am sure your town has some Good People, too.  You can't swing a dead cat without hitting one here, and I am reasonably certain that this is not just an American thing.

[bds]

Good stuff Roger.

Tomorrow, my first day back at college, will be full of hate, I have decided.
Thanks for inspiring me



(Reason for Editing: Forget the Mittens-age)

[Payne]

You are correct.

There are LOTS of Good People here.

And other assorted morons.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

You are correct.

There are LOTS of Good People here.

And other assorted morons.

HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU HATE PATSY CLINE?

TGRR,
Just noticed your sig.

[Reginald Ret]

I kick every church i pass.... does that count?

[The Good Reverend Roger]

I kick every church i pass.... does that count?

What did the building do?

[bds]

I keep noticing new people/things in Payne's sig.

[Payne]

I wrote that in a fit of pique.

It was petty and insensitive of me.

I will fix it when I can think of something that I really do detest that I can fit in there without going over the maximum character limit.

[Reginald Ret]

I kick every church i pass.... does that count?

What did the building do?

Its a billboard for dogma, it helps remind people of bad memes.

but the real reason i do it is because it is futile and it might offend some people, this entertains me.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

I am the brand of Horrible Bastard™ that is referred to, most often, as a Total Dick™.

I consider it my duty and my honor.

[Adios]

I exercise my title of Minister by marrying gay people in Kansas.

Although I sadly also used it to perform a Memorial for Mrs. Asshats little sister who passed on xmas eve. I fucking hate drugs. I really fucking hate drugs.

[Richter]

I exercise my title of Minister by marrying gay people in Kansas.

Although I sadly also used it to perform a Memorial for Mrs. Asshats little sister who passed on xmas eve. I fucking hate drugs. I really fucking hate drugs.

Shit.  Sorry to hear. Hope you and the rest of the family are doing ok.