When Pixie PIllaged My Village - What Kind Of First Date Is This?

Started by Payne, December 30, 2009, 10:11:21 AM

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Dysnomia

#15
December 31, 2009, 07:22:51 PM
PIX



DID PAYNE PUT OUT?
It's all fun and games, till someone gets herpes.

http://cdn.smosh.com/smosh-pit/122010/mow-the-lawn.gif

The Good Reverend Roger

#16
December 31, 2009, 07:34:28 PM
Quote from: Sparkley Pink Shit on December 31, 2009, 07:22:51 PM
PIX



DID PAYNE PUT OUT?

She said something about him having a 9" tongue and being able to breathe through his ears.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

LMNO

#17
December 31, 2009, 07:37:23 PM
EDIT: Roger's was funnier.

Payne

#18
January 01, 2010, 01:41:03 AM
I am quite drunk, and yes ladies he does put out on a first date.
We have just return'd from our new years celebrations somewhat quite drunk.

pics when i can find my phone cable, i had to wear my wellies, luckily they match the dress i am as of yet still wearing.

i accidentally ordered a £4 shot of whiskey. Payne agreed that it was soem VERY fine Irish whiskey.

No one has attempted to punch me but some dude in the pub tried to troll me by speaking french at me. I was stoned and therefore not caring. also being able ito instantly translate and answer in english.

on the way back we did get a burger. I'm not entirely sure if it counts as a true monstrosity of scottish cuisine cos i had canned pineapple chunks on it and anyway you look at it it's still fruit.

I still eyed the doner kebab with temptation.

and scottish rosebushes assaulted my white dress with rose pattern on it.

Payne

#19
January 01, 2010, 11:04:11 PM
Is me, Payne: I have for you pictures-

A Fire Ball is essentially a Ball of Fire. This is what it looks like:



Here are what more balls of fire look like:


(I bet you loved that shit you dirty slags)

After watching the balls and the fire, we walked home, past the official Stonehaven Residence of His Ever Lasting Gloryholeness, The Imperial Lord And Mastur of Scotland, P3nT4gR4m:



Pixie roused the entire (and terribly loyal) town of Stonehaven with the mighty and patriotic cries of "Who's House?! P3NT'S HOUSE!". We later were forced to take refuge in the Station Hotel which, on reflection, was probably not a step in the right direction (it's just..... it's just so terrible and orange). There were also Purple Mittens reported at the scene.

Moar pictures, but they are destined for higher duties and callings.

Payne

#20
January 03, 2010, 02:37:19 PM
Well, that's Pixie back off to Southampton now  :cry:.

I learned several things about her while she was up:

She has a birthmark on her belleh that looks suspiciously like a golden apple.

She appears to have some form of influence on local weather patterns, particularly when grumpy.

Scientific tests have appeared to completely confirm that she is in fact a soft Englisher and also very much female.

It is possible to recover from a disastrous first "date" at the dentist, as long as there is Drambuie involved.

She has discovered the perfect way to say the word "Mittens" that will cover ANY meatspace eventuality. It's kinda like miiiiTTTUUNNS, a cross between pleading and demanding thereof.

Pope Pixie Pickle

#22
January 04, 2010, 12:51:23 AM
The way home-

Said goodbye to a payne @ Stonehaven station, it was sad.   :cry: also I was kind of tired as did not sleep very well last night.

Then went south on a train with not enough luggage racks toward Edinburgh. This yet again resulted in me being on a sardine like train with some cunts backpack trying to suffocate me or wedge my headphones into my neck or chin until i finally got off at said station,  swearing and yelling "FUCKmittuUNNSSS." struggling with the excessively heavy pack late onto the station, so less time for grabbing food or ciggies on my epic 11.5 hour trip.  So I prioritise by grabbing a chai latte and a bagel at the Edithburgh Waverley bagely place me Payne and Trip got coffe from in August (i stole extra sticks too Trip) half a ciggie and found my train. the latte NEEDED MOAR SPICED RUM! Eve has been to said bagel kiosk also.

Scotland was all covered in snow, but it really got bad just south of Edinburgh where it was thick fog and sunshine on snow, just pretty much sky to ground white wth shades of grey and the sign that that might be a plant or a fencepost, from Cumbria to Penrith the North of England looked like a big fluffy duvet. At Penrith I was overcome with the urge to call Payne and shout "MONTY YOU TERRIBLE CUNT" as we had watched Withnail and I a couple of days previously, and yanno, any excuse to shout obscene things on a train!

Seeing as how all the trains were stupidly fucking crowded I decided to take my reservations from Birmingham, instead of risking it in Wolverhampton the stop before. Im not doing THAT again. it was basically the same train. But by Birmingham all the large luggage racks were full and finding space for the pack was nigh on impossible.

the train was late again to that connection and I had no time to eat , so got some fresh air and a cig there, got the pack into a spare seat and settled in for teh last leg, My train was late into Southampton Central, where my mum was waiting for me, she took me to get calzone and some cash before coming back to my cold flat and Bisc, the guy who lives downstairs and provides me with Internets gave me a joint and heled me up the stairs with the epic heavy backpack.

Then I took off my nail polish for work tomorrow and am about to dig out clean clothes, I think i will sleep well tonight, if only because of exhaustion.

Captain Utopia

#23
January 04, 2010, 02:36:23 AM
Sounds like a crappy journey home. I'm just going to go ahead and rerecommend the living in the same town suggestion.

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

#24
January 04, 2010, 05:10:05 AM
There can be nothing cuter in the whole fucking world than Payne and Pixie... holy crap the cuteness just made me shit myself. BRB
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."

Triple Zero

#25
January 04, 2010, 07:13:07 AM
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on January 04, 2010, 05:10:05 AM
There can be nothing cuter in the whole fucking world than Payne and Pixie... holy crap the cuteness just made me shit myself. BRB

Absofuckinglutely, I thought it was cholera at first!
Ex-Soviet Bloc Sexual Attack Swede of Tomorrow™
e-prime disclaimer: let it seem fairly unclear I understand the apparent subjectivity of the above statements. maybe.

INFORMATION SO POWERFUL, YOU ACTUALLY NEED LESS.

Dysnomia

#26
January 04, 2010, 08:30:32 AM
I cannot stand how cute Payne and Pix are.  I think I might melt into a puddle.  Aw fuck...someone get a bucket!
It's all fun and games, till someone gets herpes.

http://cdn.smosh.com/smosh-pit/122010/mow-the-lawn.gif

Pope Pixie Pickle

#27
January 04, 2010, 09:19:03 PM
Quote from: FP on January 04, 2010, 02:36:23 AM
Sounds like a crappy journey home. I'm just going to go ahead and rerecommend the living in the same town suggestion.

might be a long term aim, but seeing as I'm planning top go to Uni within the next 2 years it makes it a little tricky deciding who is moving where.  :sad:

The Good Reverend Roger

#28
January 04, 2010, 09:35:40 PM
Quote from: Pixie O'Fubar on January 04, 2010, 09:19:03 PM
Quote from: FP on January 04, 2010, 02:36:23 AM
Sounds like a crappy journey home. I'm just going to go ahead and rerecommend the living in the same town suggestion.

might be a long term aim, but seeing as I'm planning top go to Uni within the next 2 years it makes it a little tricky deciding who is moving where.  :sad:



Make him move.  Scotland's air is too thin and full of heroin, anyway.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

-Kel-

#29
January 04, 2010, 10:57:43 PM
uber cuteness going on here and in irc.....PAYNE MOVE TO LONDON.
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