Requesting Ideas

[Nast]

Bone dust maybe?  As long as it's ground slow, so it doesn't burn, it has enough of a biological smell to make you wonder.  It'd also add a bit of grainy cloudiness.

So...rob a grave, grind the remains, and make fake semen out of it?








(I know, I know, they sell prepackaged bone meal, but the thought tickled me.)

[Richter]

Dude, working with bone is as perverse as you want to get with it. 
Buying a dog bone from a pet store works, boiling and drying a bone from a ham works, harvesting the skulls os your enemies or robbing graves works too 

[Hoser McRhizzy]

Cook a 1:20 ratio of guar gum powder and water.  Store in a jar.

Label: Penis butter.

[Jasper]

After some more 'authenticity research', I think it definitely needs the grainy white clouds.   Will try bone powder.

[AFK]

Yes, I went after a fat porn star with a scalpel in hopes of obtaining an endless supply of jizz.

I do this sort of thing all the time.

OK, I might as well post the recipe.  Maybe someone will try it and improve on it in the interest of better fake jizz.

Cook a 1:20 ratio of guar gum powder and water.  Store in a jar.  That simple.

Now try it.  It's fun!

Well, it was funny when it was in MY head.

[Jasper]

Hmm, sarcasm fell flat. 

Yeah, it was funny.  I lol'd.