News:

TESTEMONAIL:  Right and Discordianism allows room for personal interpretation. You have your theories and I have mine. Unlike Christianity, Discordia allows room for ideas and opinions, and mine is well-informed and based on ancient philosophy and theology, so, my neo-Discordian friends, open your minds to my interpretation and I will open my mind to yours. That's fair enough, right? Just claiming to be discordian should mean that your mind is open and willing to learn and share ideas. You guys are fucking bashing me and your laughing at my theologies and my friends know what's up and are laughing at you and honestly this is my last shot at putting a label on my belief structure and your making me lose all hope of ever finding a ideological group I can relate to because you don't even know what the fuck I'm talking about and everything I have said is based on the founding principals of real Discordianism. Expand your mind.

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This fucking country is doomed. DOOMED!

Started by Doktor Howl, May 11, 2010, 01:38:41 AM

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Remington

#15
May 11, 2010, 09:41:27 AM
Is it plugged in?

P3nT4gR4m

#16
May 11, 2010, 12:13:09 PM
QuoteCSR
I'm sorry, sir. Is there anything else I can help you with?

CALLER
Yes there is. You work in a little call center there, right? How many people would you say work there with you on the Comfort Wipe product?

CSR
There's four of us sir, but we handle all sorts of different products...

CALLER
-click-

This guy is a master! A MASTER I TELL YOU!

I'm up to my arse in Brexit Numpties, but I want more.  Target-rich environments are the new sexy.
Not actually a meat product.
Ass-Kicking & Foot-Stomping Ancient Master of SHIT FUCK FUCK FUCK
Awful and Bent Behemothic Results of Last Night's Painful Squat.
High Altitude Haggis-Filled Sex Bucket From Beyond Time and Space.
Internet Monkey Person of Filthy and Immoral Pygmy-Porn Wart Contagion
Octomom Auxillary Heat Exchanger Repairman
walking the fine line line between genius and batshit fucking crazy

"computation is a pattern in the spacetime arrangement of particles, and it's not the particles but the pattern that really matters! Matter doesn't matter." -- Max Tegmark

BadBeast

#17
May 12, 2010, 07:41:39 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on May 11, 2010, 01:55:01 AM
Quote from: Professor Freeky on May 11, 2010, 01:53:33 AM
:vom: :vom: :vom: :vom:

WHY WOULD YOU DO SOMETHING LIKE THAT WITHOUT WARNING A PERSON, DOK? THE HORROR, THE HORROR!!!



This actually makes me kinda sad.

Makes me kinda HUNGRY!!
"We need a plane for Bombing, Strafing, Assault and Battery, Interception, Ground Support, and Reconaissance,
NOT JUST A "FAIR WEATHER FIGHTER"!

"I kinda like him. It's like he sees inside my soul" ~ Nigel


Whoever puts their hand on me to govern me, is a usurper, and a tyrant, and I declare them my enemy!

"And when the clouds obscure the moon, and normal service is resumed. It wont. Mean. A. Thing"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zpkCJDYxH-4

Requia ☣

#18
May 12, 2010, 07:46:02 PM
Every time I look at that picture I see more pretzels. :eek:
Inflatable dolls are not recognized flotation devices.

Adios

#19
May 12, 2010, 07:57:49 PM
Quote from: Requia ☣ on May 12, 2010, 07:46:02 PM
Every time I look at that picture I see more pretzels. :eek:

I see a self cleaning Gene pool.

Jenne

#20
May 12, 2010, 08:13:32 PM
Ogod.  I missed this fread.  Wow.  Just.  No. Yeah.  WOW.

Jasper

#21
May 12, 2010, 08:16:47 PM
YOU GUYS

THERE'S THIS NEW THING

IT'S CALLED A BIDET

LMNO

#22
May 12, 2010, 08:17:44 PM
SHADDAP, COMMIE BASTARD.

Elder Iptuous

#23
May 12, 2010, 08:21:19 PM
srsly.
they have aftermarket toilet integrating bidets...
if i was going for the fatassed thing, i would think that would be the proper investment.

the last yatto

#24
May 12, 2010, 09:07:21 PM
Look, asshole:  Your 'incomprehensible' act, your word-salad, your pinealism...It BORES ME.  I've been incomprehensible for so long, I TEACH IT TO MBA CANDIDATES.  So if you simply MUST talk about your pineal gland or happy children dancing in the wildflowers, go talk to Roger, because he digs that kind of shit

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

#25
May 13, 2010, 01:10:14 AM
If I had room in my bathroom I'd get a bidet. Ohmygod, have you ever used one? Soothing warm-water-on-yer-pucker pleasure!
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."

Elder Iptuous

#26
May 13, 2010, 02:13:50 AM
Quote from: The Lord and Lady Omnibus Fuck on May 13, 2010, 01:10:14 AM
If I had room in my bathroom I'd get a bidet. Ohmygod, have you ever used one? Soothing warm-water-on-yer-pucker pleasure!

they make some pretty fancy toilet integrated units from Japan.
I've considered getting one for my throne....

Doktor Howl

#27
May 13, 2010, 02:34:54 AM
Quote from: The Lord and Lady Omnibus Fuck on May 13, 2010, 01:10:14 AM
If I had room in my bathroom I'd get a bidet. Ohmygod, have you ever used one? Soothing warm-water-on-yer-pucker pleasure!

Insufficiently manly.  I shall continue to wipe my ass with emory cloth.
Molon Lube

Elder Iptuous

#28
May 13, 2010, 03:16:57 AM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on May 13, 2010, 02:34:54 AM
Quote from: The Lord and Lady Omnibus Fuck on May 13, 2010, 01:10:14 AM
If I had room in my bathroom I'd get a bidet. Ohmygod, have you ever used one? Soothing warm-water-on-yer-pucker pleasure!

Insufficiently manly.  I shall continue to wipe my ass with emory cloth.

you could but bead blast media in the bidet....

Jenne

#29
May 13, 2010, 04:29:50 AM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=crfGXmxJ1vM

I had to find this, because my husband thought it was a prank.  I like how in the commercial they make it sound like you can wrench your shoulder wiping your ass...
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