Female sexual dysfunction

[ñͤͣ̄ͦ̌̑͗͊͛͂͗ ̸̨̨̣̺̼̣̜͙͈͕̮̊̈́̈͂͛̽͊ͭ̓͆ͅé ̰̓̓́ͯ́́͞]

When a woman is aroused her entire vulva becomes engorged with blood, her vagina changes shape, and her cervix moves to a different position.  So it is entirely possible for a woman to have erectile dysfunction, it's just not as visible.  And yeah, having sex before one is aroused enough can be really painful.  I think they're comparable.

Yes, but a vagina is not a penis. They are fundamentally different organs. Would you also compare your vagina to someone who is intersex?

There are fundamentally different arousal patterns between men and women.

We place more stock in the visual and the sight of limpdick creates a vicious cycle.

Women tend to place more stock in the context and if you can't perform, you don't have this glaringly obvious visual evidence of it that both of you can see and feel.

When women can't perform there is no obvious visual reminder of it, which lessens the blow.

[BADGE OF HONOR]

You're weirdly vehement about this.  Having to tell someone no or suffer pain (ie not being able to perform) is pretty fucking rough.  You, as a male, might think not having a visual cue isn't as bad, but it is.  Having to say "this isn't happening right now" without any obvious proof when your partner is ready to go is an unpleasant conversation.  The other option, gritting your teeth and hoping it'll be over fast, is even worse.  Having a limp dick hurts your ego.  Having unaroused sex hurts your vagina.

[ñͤͣ̄ͦ̌̑͗͊͛͂͗ ̸̨̨̣̺̼̣̜͙͈͕̮̊̈́̈͂͛̽͊ͭ̓͆ͅé ̰̓̓́ͯ́́͞]

You're weirdly vehement about this.  Having to tell someone no or suffer pain (ie not being able to perform) is pretty fucking rough.  You, as a male, might think not having a visual cue isn't as bad, but it is.  Having to say "this isn't happening right now" without any obvious proof when your partner is ready to go is an unpleasant conversation.  The other option, gritting your teeth and hoping it'll be over fast, is even worse.  Having a limp dick hurts your ego.  Having unaroused sex hurts your vagina.

It's an unpleasant conversation for both sexes, sure, but only one has the sad dangling little softie to reinforce the failure—a symbol incarnate of the powerless male.

If I were able to have sex with horrible pain when my penis wouldn't cooperate, I would have made that sacrifice. But there is no way to do that. That isn't even an option with limpdick. You can't just stuff it in anyway.

That's a hole in your argument that just won't be filled.

There is some commonality, I acknowledge that, but what I find strange is that even though you just posted a major difference, you're not acknowledging a major difference in experience.

It was never traumatic for me, because it happened only a few times and could be attributed to drugs. But if that was a chronic condition, it could be very deflating in particular ways that more than likely do not translate to a female's experience with sexual dysfunction.

"Yeah, there are some things about the opposite sex that I can't fully understand, and that's ok." I don't see what's so hard about saying that.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

I feel like Dimo and Badge have a pretty good handle on the matter. I struggled with female sexual arousal dysfunction for over ten years, to the point of being suicidal, so it is a very personal issue for me. I have taken part in many conversations in which the concept that having a hole should be enough (you have a hole, as well, gentlemen... if you can't get hard, clearly you should simply just succumb to penetration, so you can be whole)  but there is a very pervasive idea, even in the medical field, that female sexual dysfunction simply lacks emotional and psychological repurcussion.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

There is also the question of whether sex without female arousal is rape, which has certainly been proposed many times.

[memy]

The female genitalia changes shape multiple times and in multiple places during intercourse.

The clitoris can become more stiff, especially when directly aroused as in the case of masturbation, fingering, or oral sex. If the clitoris cannot become aroused at all even when it should be stimulated, this makes the possibility for female orgasm very remote as this seems to be considered a (usually) necessary component of climaxing.

By the way, hyenas have a matriarchal society. The female queen has a clitoris that, when stiff, is as large as a penis, which the queen uses to rape its subjects. If the clitoris could not become stiff this way, preventing the queen from raping, well...the female wouldn't be queen in the first place.

The walls of the uterus at first moisten and loosen to allow the penis inside, but then as stimulation increases the walls close around the head of the penis to help prevent the penis from slipping out during the all-important ejaculation. This trait arose as an evolutionary necessity - the better the vagina is at letting a penis in and then keeping it in, the better it was at producing children.

So yeah, a female can still ENDURE sex even if it hurts, but if it's just enduring sex, how can you be so sure you would want it so badly? Reproduction, after all, is the first body processes that the body lets go in times of crisis. If you're feeling pain, if you're feeling sick, your body is just not going to be all that interested in making babies. It's only natural that at first you'll say "yes, I want sex, I have the sex drive" and then when you go at it and your dick feels like it's splitting open forcibly with each thrust, change your mind and say "this doesn't seem appealing anymore".

If we were to feel the exact same thing, we wouldn't want to make that sacrifice, because it just wouldn't be sex, just painful humping. When I have one of my several sexual dysfunctions (in this case, and rarely, delayed ejaculation) I end up just not wanting to have sex, even while I'm in the middle of having sex, even if I really do want sex, even if I do have an erection, because it is just not feeling good at all. I end up getting frustrated and sweaty and mad at myself.

So, the hole in the other side of the argument is that, as a guy with sexual dysfunctions, I am able to have sex without horrible pain when my penis doesn't cooperate, and I'm NEVER in the mood to make that sacrifice because it leaves me trembling and hot and tired and unsatisfied from taking so goddamn long.

But that's just me.

[ñͤͣ̄ͦ̌̑͗͊͛͂͗ ̸̨̨̣̺̼̣̜͙͈͕̮̊̈́̈͂͛̽͊ͭ̓͆ͅé ̰̓̓́ͯ́́͞]

I feel like Dimo and Badge have a pretty good handle on the matter. I struggled with female sexual arousal dysfunction for over ten years, to the point of being suicidal, so it is a very personal issue for me. I have taken part in many conversations in which the concept that having a hole should be enough (you have a hole, as well, gentlemen... if you can't get hard, clearly you should simply just succumb to penetration, so you can be whole)  but there is a very pervasive idea, even in the medical field, that female sexual dysfunction simply lacks emotional and psychological repurcussion.

I'm certainly not trying to invalidate your experience either. Isn't it possible that sexual dysfunction can be horrible in different ways between the sexes? I think trying to compare very personal experiences like this is a fruitless pursuit.

I definitely don't think, "having a hole is enough." But I do think that having recourse to allowing sex even if it is painful serves as a kind of panic button. A shitty, shitty panic button sure, but it is an option a woman could choose. You may never press it, but knowing that you have that option could offer some relief. (I wouldn't call that rape, by the way)

For men, there is no panic button.* You're SOL. And you can't help but look at the pitiful thing. She can't help but look at it. He can't help but look at you looking at it. But, apparently there is pretty good treatment.

For women, it sounds like treatment isn't very good and you have to suffer with insulting medical types. I have no reference for that. There is no comparison, they are too different and too personal.

*I have offered my hindquarters on many occasions but my girlfriends were not interested. I'm not particularly interested, but I've always been game to doing whatever gets off the women I've been with.

[Adios]

I have limp dick. My wife has had all her parts removed. We both suffer from loss of sex drive and inability to perform. Once in a while we are able to have sex and sometimes it ends in climax and sometimes it doesn't. We were both very sexual people at one time and I will tell you all now that male or female it has an impact emotionally.

Whether it's a limp dick or a dry hole, there is no difference. I have seen my wife cry because of the loss of her sexuality.

So put your male ego back on the shelf for this topic.

edit; this came across as arrogant and rude, that is not the way I meant it to. My wife and I went from up to 10 times a day to 0. It's a rough ride.

[Reginald Ret]

If sex is making you panic, don't have sex.

[ñͤͣ̄ͦ̌̑͗͊͛͂͗ ̸̨̨̣̺̼̣̜͙͈͕̮̊̈́̈͂͛̽͊ͭ̓͆ͅé ̰̓̓́ͯ́́͞]

If sex is making you panic, don't have sex.

[Adios]

If sex is making you panic, don't have sex.

Yeah, nice downplay. What Mrs. Hawk and I miss the most is the intimacy. We have found placebos for that but we still miss it.

[Reginald Ret]

?
I may not have a lot of sex experience, but i do know panic.
Panic is traumatizing.
Nothing is worth being in a constant state of panic over.

[Nephew Twiddleton]

I feel like Dimo and Badge have a pretty good handle on the matter. I struggled with female sexual arousal dysfunction for over ten years, to the point of being suicidal, so it is a very personal issue for me. I have taken part in many conversations in which the concept that having a hole should be enough (you have a hole, as well, gentlemen... if you can't get hard, clearly you should simply just succumb to penetration, so you can be whole)  but there is a very pervasive idea, even in the medical field, that female sexual dysfunction simply lacks emotional and psychological repurcussion.

I'm certainly not trying to invalidate your experience either. Isn't it possible that sexual dysfunction can be horrible in different ways between the sexes? I think trying to compare very personal experiences like this is a fruitless pursuit.

I definitely don't think, "having a hole is enough." But I do think that having recourse to allowing sex even if it is painful serves as a kind of panic button. A shitty, shitty panic button sure, but it is an option a woman could choose. You may never press it, but knowing that you have that option could offer some relief. (I wouldn't call that rape, by the way)

For men, there is no panic button.* You're SOL. And you can't help but look at the pitiful thing. She can't help but look at it. He can't help but look at you looking at it. But, apparently there is pretty good treatment.

For women, it sounds like treatment isn't very good and you have to suffer with insulting medical types. I have no reference for that. There is no comparison, they are too different and too personal.

*I have offered my hindquarters on many occasions but my girlfriends were not interested. I'm not particularly interested, but I've always been game to doing whatever gets off the women I've been with.

I agree with the "there's no way to fully understand someone else/difference between male and female problems" angle. I'm not going to understand menstruation and child birth. The mechanics, yes, the experience, nope.

The rest of it not so much. Nigel's not saying that female sexual dysfunction is worse. She's just saying that ED is not worse. This might be an extreme example, but it's kinda the same as a guy saying him being raped in the butt is more psychologically damaging and traumatic than a woman being raped. Well, no, both parties got raped. End of story. I think that's the sort of mentality that Nigel is arguing against. Bringing in her own experiences, I would be inclined to say that female sexual dysfunction is probably the worse of the two, since it's basically not taken seriously.

[East Coast Hustle]

I may not have a lot of sex experience

you make that abundantly clear almost every time you post.

[East Coast Hustle]

I feel like Dimo and Badge have a pretty good handle on the matter. I struggled with female sexual arousal dysfunction for over ten years, to the point of being suicidal, so it is a very personal issue for me. I have taken part in many conversations in which the concept that having a hole should be enough (you have a hole, as well, gentlemen... if you can't get hard, clearly you should simply just succumb to penetration, so you can be whole)  but there is a very pervasive idea, even in the medical field, that female sexual dysfunction simply lacks emotional and psychological repurcussion.

I'm certainly not trying to invalidate your experience either. Isn't it possible that sexual dysfunction can be horrible in different ways between the sexes? I think trying to compare very personal experiences like this is a fruitless pursuit.

I definitely don't think, "having a hole is enough." But I do think that having recourse to allowing sex even if it is painful serves as a kind of panic button. A shitty, shitty panic button sure, but it is an option a woman could choose. You may never press it, but knowing that you have that option could offer some relief. (I wouldn't call that rape, by the way)

For men, there is no panic button.* You're SOL. And you can't help but look at the pitiful thing. She can't help but look at it. He can't help but look at you looking at it. But, apparently there is pretty good treatment.

For women, it sounds like treatment isn't very good and you have to suffer with insulting medical types. I have no reference for that. There is no comparison, they are too different and too personal.

*I have offered my hindquarters on many occasions but my girlfriends were not interested. I'm not particularly interested, but I've always been game to doing whatever gets off the women I've been with.

having no personal experience or reference point on this subject (thank fucking god), my initial instinct is to agree with Net that while both are undoubtedly horrible and personally traumatizing, trying to compare them seems utterly pointless unless you're trolling someplace where this type of discussion is almost certain to devolve into mysogynist/misandrist idiocy. But since my agreement on the point is strictly academic, I'm reserving judgement until such time as I end up getting limpdick.