Post your "American Moments" here.

[Dysnomia]

When I get beyond the age where I'm even slightly salvageable, I'll just lose my shit and be the bitchy old lady who cusses at kids, and everyone thinks is senile.   

Fuck yeah.

GET OFF MY LAWN, YOU HOODLUMS!

Dok,
Doesn't have a lawn.

GODDAMN CROWS ALWAYS BUZZING AROUND MY HOUSE!


THE END OF THE WORLD IS COMING


GODDAMN YOU CROWS

I am currently coloring my hair because I nearly had a heart attack about the couple white hairs that are starting to grow in.

Reason #5 that I shave my head and face.

What about your 'Back, crack, and sack'?

Fuck no.  I'm a goddamn Yeti.  I have people come by once a month to beat the birds and small animals out of my back hair alone.

Everyone should have people.

Lizzay,
nekkid from the neck down.  kthx

[Juana]

The other day, while driving to the bank, I saw a very, very large redneck standing on the side of the busy road, waiting to cross (not at the cross walk a hundred feet up, where he could have had immediate crossing) while holding a gigantic soda in one hand and clutching a case of shitty beer.

Oh, and it was before noon.

You mean to say you have 'good' beer in America? Nice warm Beer? From a wooden barrel?

I have never had a beer I liked. But this was bad beer, even by American standards. Coors light or something, I think.

[Suu]

The other day, while driving to the bank, I saw a very, very large redneck standing on the side of the busy road, waiting to cross (not at the cross walk a hundred feet up, where he could have had immediate crossing) while holding a gigantic soda in one hand and clutching a case of shitty beer.

Oh, and it was before noon.

You mean to say you have 'good' beer in America? Nice warm Beer? From a wooden barrel?

We do, but you have to know where to get it. In fact, MOST American beer IS good, but nothing you can buy in your neck of the woods or in a run of the mill grocery or liquor store is.

-Suu
Has totally had American-made beer on cask. There is hope for us yet.

[Suu]

The other day, while driving to the bank, I saw a very, very large redneck standing on the side of the busy road, waiting to cross (not at the cross walk a hundred feet up, where he could have had immediate crossing) while holding a gigantic soda in one hand and clutching a case of shitty beer.

Oh, and it was before noon.

You mean to say you have 'good' beer in America? Nice warm Beer? From a wooden barrel?

I have never had a beer I liked. But this was bad beer, even by American standards. Coors light or something, I think.

Coors Light is not beer.

[Juana]

Ok. Piss in a can some idiot called beer. Either way, dumb ass redneck was clutching a case of it while trying to cross a busy road.

[Sir Squid Diddimus]

The other day, while driving to the bank, I saw a very, very large redneck standing on the side of the busy road, waiting to cross (not at the cross walk a hundred feet up, where he could have had immediate crossing) while holding a gigantic soda in one hand and clutching a case of shitty beer.

Oh, and it was before noon.

You mean to say you have 'good' beer in America? Nice warm Beer? From a wooden barrel?

Quit acting like we can't make beer.  You just have to go to the right places. Or homebrew meetings.

[PopeTom]

I worry and complain about how BP has caused a major environmental disaster in the gulf.

I then engage in in a variety of entertainment options powered by electricity.   Where does this electricity come from?  Coal burning power plants that, most likely, get their coal from mining companies that excavate it out of the top of mountains.  AFTER they have blown them off the tops of mountains and down into river valleys.

[Dysnomia]

while I was on vacation I saw earrings for sale that were made out of starbucks cards.


It's capitalism, and recycling all in one!

[Suu]

I worry and complain about how BP has caused a major environmental disaster in the gulf.

I then engage in in a variety of entertainment options powered by electricity.   Where does this electricity come from?  Coal burning power plants that, most likely, get their coal from mining companies that excavate it out of the top of mountains.  AFTER they have blown them off the tops of mountains and down into river valleys.

THIS. FUCKING THIS.

[tyrannosaurus vex]

What what?

[Freeky]

What what?

Damn.

[Juana]

While fiddling with my stepdad's camera, I noticed it has a self portrait setting. MySpace generation consumers ftw.

[Dysnomia]

What what?

DONT YOU WORRY


I WON'T BITE (NOT THAT HARD)

[Jenne]

I have the day off with no 1) kids 2) work 3) husband, and so I sleep the fuck in and don't do anything even though my house looks like someone set off a bomb in several rooms. 

I have every INTENT on getting the fuck out of the house, walking the dogs, and buying a book I'm supposed to have read by THURSDAY for a book club meeting...but right now the only pressing things I'm going to take care of is 1) taking a pee and 2) having a coffee break.

It's NOON and I'm still in my PJ's.  On a motherfucking TUESDAY. (whataworld)

[Jenne]

What what?

Yeah, I got introduced to this song about 3 years ago, and now I sing it, just that catchy part, to my kids.

I'm a bad mom.    (one of these days they're gonna catch on to what that part of the song means)