You Want Your Country Back? Sure, here, take the fucking thing.....

[AFK]

....because it's broken anyway.

Good fucking lord, this place is going insane.  And it looks like the pretenses are just about melted away.  America sold itself for quite awhile as this great melting pot of cultures and peoples.  We had warm and fuzzy cartoons about Russian Mice risking their lives to emigrate to the U.S. to get a piece of the American Dream.  The Scorpions were singing about the Winds of Change and we were all a nice big happy global family.  Well, I guess not really, but at least the window dressing was pretty.

But fuck that noise now.  Are you Hispanic?  Get the fuck out of here!  Gay?  No marriage for you!  Muslim?  OH MY FUCKING GOD GET OUT OF NEW YORK CITY WITH YOUR COMMUNITY CENTER YOU JUST WANT TO BLOW UP MORE BUILDINGS WITH WOMMINZ AND CHILDRENZEZ AND I HATE YOU HATE YOU HATE YOU!!!!!

Jesus H. Christ.  People are simultaneously stuck in 2001 and 1940.  Civil fucking liberties?  Get that shit out of here!  If you don't bleed American Christian Red you aren't our kind and are probably trying to destroy America or something.  Yeah, that 9/11 thing fucking sucked.  You lost your brother, mother, father, cousin, best friend in the attacks?  I'm sorry.  But listen, let me give you some advice.  It's time to move the fuck on.  The bastards who killed your loved one pretty much evaporated when those planes hit those buildings.  The other masterminds are yucking it up right now in some mountain desert land on the other side of the Atlantic.  The people who want to build this community center don't want to get you again.  They just want to have a shiny building with a museum and coffee shop and other touristy-type things.  They're going to want you to come buy a set of coasters or something.  They aren't going to kill you!

But no, this country is fucking broken, and I don't know if it can be fixed or not.  So all of you dipshits out here screaming and crying and moaning about wanting your country back from the dirty hispanics, evil Muslims, blasphemous gays, and sooper sekret Kenyan Muslim Man Obama, take the goddamn thing!  It looks like shit and smells worse.  

[MMIX]

Hell yeah! This should be graffitied in 10 foot high letters on every public building in the States










eta Mittens

[Adios]

Damn Fine Rant!

[Dysfunctional Cunt]

WOW RWHN!  That was awesome!  You should write a lot more!!

[Cramulus]

fuck yeah!

Yo it makes me want to create a fake platform of some sort
one which captures this spirit

AMERICA is for STRAIGHT WHITE MEN

It would be like: just take the subtext of the prop8 folks, the anti-muslim folks, the irrationally anti-obama folks (as opposed to the guys that dislike him for more well-grounded reasons), the entire fox news contingent, etc etc etc, just take all that subtext and state it really straight up in a way which doesn't disguise the racism, the paranoid nationalism, and the hegemony fetishism.

[Adios]

You don't have to be white and straight these days, just rich and well connected, but the same principles still function. If you are rich enough and have the right friends, then your 'flaws' will be, not forgotten, but temporarily overlooked.

[AFK]

WOW RWHN!  That was awesome!  You should write a lot more!!

Yeah, I've been too fat and complacent for the past 2 to 3 years.  

This stuff has just really been eating at me.  Ever since the birther stuff emerged, there has been this subtext that's been slogging along.  It used to be we would point and laugh at the right-wingers like David Duke who hated everyone who wasn't white.  "Aww, ha ha ha!!!  Look at that crazy David Duke.  Ain't he a riot?"

Now, it's mainstream.  The average joe is out in the street hollaring about the brown people and the gay people and the brown guy who is our President but really some sekret Muslim who wants to introduce socialist sharia law.

I think this mosque thing is really getting to me on a personal level because I work very closely with 4 individuals who are Muslims from Somalia.  They are the nicest people you could ever meet.  They love America and love being in America.  They want to be like the rest of us.  They want to wear jeans, they want to become adept at speaking English, they want to shop at Wal-Mart (poor souls).

And I've seen the rejection and hate first hand.  The fucking Mayor here at one point actually publicly announced that he didn't want any more Somalis moving into town.  They were some big huge catastrophic drain on resources when the actual facts showed the percentage of resources they use compared to others was in the single digits.  

I'm just done.  I'm an American still, but it's really just a technicality now.  This place is broken in ways that I can't even find words to express.  

[Chairman Risus]

Way to put words to what I'm sure too many of us are feeling. I hope more writing is in the future for you.

[Doktor Howl]

I don't believe any of it, anymore.  The BP spill?  Teabaggers?  Terrorist Babies?  For fucking real?  Either they're having us on, or they're the dumbest motherfuckers ever born.

Either way, I'm not. Having. It.

It's all bullshit, RWHN.  It's all a gag, a fucking joke, there's no possible way this country can be as fucking stupid and hateful as it is without immediately falling to pieces.  I'm now 169% sure we're being had.

Know what I mean?

[Nephew Twiddleton]

WOW RWHN!  That was awesome!  You should write a lot more!!

Yeah, I've been too fat and complacent for the past 2 to 3 years.  

This stuff has just really been eating at me.  Ever since the birther stuff emerged, there has been this subtext that's been slogging along.  It used to be we would point and laugh at the right-wingers like David Duke who hated everyone who wasn't white.  "Aww, ha ha ha!!!  Look at that crazy David Duke.  Ain't he a riot?"

Now, it's mainstream.  The average joe is out in the street hollaring about the brown people and the gay people and the brown guy who is our President but really some sekret Muslim who wants to introduce socialist sharia law.

I think this mosque thing is really getting to me on a personal level because I work very closely with 4 individuals who are Muslims from Somalia.  They are the nicest people you could ever meet.  They love America and love being in America.  They want to be like the rest of us.  They want to wear jeans, they want to become adept at speaking English, they want to shop at Wal-Mart (poor souls).

And I've seen the rejection and hate first hand.  The fucking Mayor here at one point actually publicly announced that he didn't want any more Somalis moving into town.  They were some big huge catastrophic drain on resources when the actual facts showed the percentage of resources they use compared to others was in the single digits.  

I'm just done.  I'm an American still, but it's really just a technicality now.  This place is broken in ways that I can't even find words to express.  

In response to this, I might make up some posters or flyers to put around town that say something like "LETS TAKE OUR COUNTRY BACK! Racist Homophobes against the Islamic Socialist Agenda Rally at [insert location and date]"

[AFK]

I don't believe any of it, anymore.  The BP spill?  Teabaggers?  Terrorist Babies?  For fucking real?  Either they're having us on, or they're the dumbest motherfuckers ever born.

Either way, I'm not. Having. It.

It's all bullshit, RWHN.  It's all a gag, a fucking joke, there's no possible way this country can be as fucking stupid and hateful as it is without immediately falling to pieces.  I'm now 169% sure we're being had.

Know what I mean?

Yep.  It's like we're living in the middle of a spoof-film about present-day America.  But I think even this would be too far-fetched and out there for Mel Brooks. 

And it's really bad because even the foils are wilting.  I mean, I'm not terribly shocked that Harry Reid decided to sell out in order to beat the paper bag that is Sharron Angle in his re-election bid.  But man, he didn't even try to nuance it.  And Obama?  I thought he had actually grown a pair there for a minute on Friday.  But then comes Saturday and we discover they are attached by velcro. 

So who's fighting for the little guys now?  Right now I only see people fighting against the little guys.  I certainly hope you are right, that this is a big have-on and we'll find out the man behind the curtain is Bugs Bunny in a Newt Gingrich get-up. 

Because this gag reel is making me gag for real. 

[Doktor Howl]

So who's fighting for the little guys now?  Right now I only see people fighting against the little guys.  I certainly hope you are right, that this is a big have-on and we'll find out the man behind the curtain is Bugs Bunny in a Newt Gingrich get-up. 

30 bikers against one server room geek isn't a fight.  Especially if the other server room geeks are cheering the bikers on.

Because this gag reel is making me gag for real. 

It makes me laugh.  Until I can't stop screaming.

[Cain]

You know, I'm starting to believe that they're doing this on purpose.  It's not that they're so stupid as they don't understand an empire needs ethnic and religious plurality to survive more than 10 years without going all Nazi on everyone, it's that they really do want to violate Godwin's Law and fuck the corpse.  Well, the wingnuts, anyway.  The Dems will equivocate and then reluctantly go along with the GOP program, so long as they can occasionally elect someone who sticks to the program but doesn't use nasty racist language to support it (ie Obama).

[Doktor Howl]

You know, I'm starting to believe that they're doing this on purpose.  It's not that they're so stupid as they don't understand an empire needs ethnic and religious plurality to survive more than 10 years without going all Nazi on everyone, it's that they really do want to violate Godwin's Law and fuck the corpse.  Well, the wingnuts, anyway.  The Dems will equivocate and then reluctantly go along with the GOP program, so long as they can occasionally elect someone who sticks to the program but doesn't use nasty racist language to support it (ie Obama).

I still think they're trolling us, though.

I mean, terrorist babies?  FFS.  Yank the other one, it has bells.

[Prince Glittersnatch III]

I want to make a T-Shirt that says

"Sodomy is between a MAN AND A WOMAN"

Goddamn gays stealin buttsecks from us good christian folk.