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OkCupid: A Guy's Perspective

Started by saturnine, March 03, 2011, 08:33:14 AM

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The Good Reverend Roger

#225
April 11, 2011, 08:14:32 PM
Quote from: PopeTom on April 11, 2011, 08:07:14 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on April 11, 2011, 07:47:26 PM
Quote from: Rip City Hustle on April 11, 2011, 07:46:10 PM
Are there people who use OKCupid who aren't actually looking for sex? :lulz:

Me.

I'm just there to piss people off.

I thought pissing people off was the only way you could reach orgasm?

:mrgreen:

Nonsense.  That's just how I reach headgasm.  I still prefer someone doing things to my bits for orgasms.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Triple Zero

#226
April 29, 2011, 09:32:42 PM
So I wonder, are there also stories about females not being able to find the penis, then?

I mean, the same "in the middle and front is too obvious" reasoning holds, right? :)
Ex-Soviet Bloc Sexual Attack Swede of Tomorrow™
e-prime disclaimer: let it seem fairly unclear I understand the apparent subjectivity of the above statements. maybe.

INFORMATION SO POWERFUL, YOU ACTUALLY NEED LESS.

Luna

#227
April 29, 2011, 09:34:18 PM
Quote from: Triple Zero on April 29, 2011, 09:32:42 PM
So I wonder, are there also stories about females not being able to find the penis, then?

I mean, the same "in the middle and front is too obvious" reasoning holds, right? :)

Only the once.

Never got a chance with that one again, after, "Oh, there!  Looks like a penis, only smaller."

He took significant offense.   :evil:
Death-dealing hormone freak of deliciousness
Pagan-Stomping Valkyrie of the Interbutts™
Rampaging Slayer of Shit-Fountain Habitues

"My father says that almost the whole world is asleep. Everybody you know, everybody you see, everybody you talk to. He says that only a few people are awake, and they live in a state of constant, total amazement."

Quote from: The Payne on November 16, 2011, 07:08:55 PM
If Luna was a furry, she'd sex humans and scream "BEASTIALITY!" at the top of her lungs at inopportune times.

Quote from: Nigel on March 24, 2011, 01:54:48 AM
I like the Luna one. She is a good one.

Quote
"Stop talking to yourself.  You don't like you any better than anyone else who knows you."

*GrumpButt*

#228
April 30, 2011, 12:04:13 AM
Quote from: Luna on April 29, 2011, 09:34:18 PM
Quote from: Triple Zero on April 29, 2011, 09:32:42 PM
So I wonder, are there also stories about females not being able to find the penis, then?

I mean, the same "in the middle and front is too obvious" reasoning holds, right? :)

Only the once.

Never got a chance with that one again, after, "Oh, there!  Looks like a penis, only smaller."

He took significant offense.   :evil:

Oshit. I'm stealing that!
*sigh* You have to be kidding me.

Luna

#229
April 30, 2011, 12:23:45 AM
Quote from: *GrumpButt* on April 30, 2011, 12:04:13 AM
Quote from: Luna on April 29, 2011, 09:34:18 PM
Quote from: Triple Zero on April 29, 2011, 09:32:42 PM
So I wonder, are there also stories about females not being able to find the penis, then?

I mean, the same "in the middle and front is too obvious" reasoning holds, right? :)

Only the once.

Never got a chance with that one again, after, "Oh, there!  Looks like a penis, only smaller."

He took significant offense.   :evil:

Oshit. I'm stealing that!

Use with caution.  The wrong type might use that for an excuse to get violent.
Death-dealing hormone freak of deliciousness
Pagan-Stomping Valkyrie of the Interbutts™
Rampaging Slayer of Shit-Fountain Habitues

"My father says that almost the whole world is asleep. Everybody you know, everybody you see, everybody you talk to. He says that only a few people are awake, and they live in a state of constant, total amazement."

Quote from: The Payne on November 16, 2011, 07:08:55 PM
If Luna was a furry, she'd sex humans and scream "BEASTIALITY!" at the top of her lungs at inopportune times.

Quote from: Nigel on March 24, 2011, 01:54:48 AM
I like the Luna one. She is a good one.

Quote
"Stop talking to yourself.  You don't like you any better than anyone else who knows you."

*GrumpButt*

#230
April 30, 2011, 12:35:13 AM
For sure.

I'm married so there's only one guy I'm going to use that on.....  :evil:
*sigh* You have to be kidding me.

Luna

#231
April 30, 2011, 12:38:56 AM
Quote from: *GrumpButt* on April 30, 2011, 12:35:13 AM
For sure.

I'm married so there's only one guy I'm going to use that on.....  :evil:

:lulz:

Enjoy.
Death-dealing hormone freak of deliciousness
Pagan-Stomping Valkyrie of the Interbutts™
Rampaging Slayer of Shit-Fountain Habitues

"My father says that almost the whole world is asleep. Everybody you know, everybody you see, everybody you talk to. He says that only a few people are awake, and they live in a state of constant, total amazement."

Quote from: The Payne on November 16, 2011, 07:08:55 PM
If Luna was a furry, she'd sex humans and scream "BEASTIALITY!" at the top of her lungs at inopportune times.

Quote from: Nigel on March 24, 2011, 01:54:48 AM
I like the Luna one. She is a good one.

Quote
"Stop talking to yourself.  You don't like you any better than anyone else who knows you."

*GrumpButt*

#232
April 30, 2011, 12:40:55 AM
Oh I will.

The range of facial expressions is going to be FABULOUS.
*sigh* You have to be kidding me.

Telarus

#233
April 30, 2011, 06:44:38 AM
 :lulz:
Telarus, KSC,
.__.  Keeper of the Contradictory Cephalopod, Zenarchist Swordsman,
(0o)  Tender to the Edible Zen Garden, Ratcheting Metallic Sex Doll of The End Times,
/||\   Episkopos of the Amorphous Dreams Cabal

Join the Doll Underground! Experience the Phantasmagorical Safari!

PopeTom

#234
May 01, 2011, 02:54:06 PM
Quote from: Luna on April 29, 2011, 09:34:18 PM
Quote from: Triple Zero on April 29, 2011, 09:32:42 PM
So I wonder, are there also stories about females not being able to find the penis, then?

I mean, the same "in the middle and front is too obvious" reasoning holds, right? :)

Only the once.

Never got a chance with that one again, after, "Oh, there!  Looks like a penis, only smaller."

He took significant offense.   :evil:

The basic rule is:

Point if you have to. 
Laugh if you must. 
Please don't do both at the same time.
-PopeTom

I am the result of 13.75 ± 0.13 billion years of random chance. Now that I exist I see no reason to start planning and organizing everything in my life.

Random dumb luck got me here, random dumb luck will get me to where I'm going.

Hail Eris!

East Coast Hustle

#235
May 05, 2011, 09:22:18 PM
So my new thing is reading someone's profile that sounds sorta douchey, picking out the most irrelevant or casually-presented thing in it, and sending them a one-sentence message (worded as harshly and bluntly as possible) picking apart that thing.
Rabid Colostomy Hole Jammer of the Coming Apocalypse™

The Devil is in the details; God is in the nuance.


Some yahoo yelled at me, saying 'GIVE ME LIBERTY OR GIVE ME DEATH', and I thought, "I'm feeling generous today.  Why not BOTH?"

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

#236
May 05, 2011, 10:09:42 PM
Quote from: Rip City Hustle on May 05, 2011, 09:22:18 PM
So my new thing is reading someone's profile that sounds sorta douchey, picking out the most irrelevant or casually-presented thing in it, and sending them a one-sentence message (worded as harshly and bluntly as possible) picking apart that thing.

:lulz: That sounds like fun!

I disabled my account after one too many creepos thought that my newly-single status and declaration that I'm not actually dating right now was a combination that makes me ripe for initially pretending to be sweet and caring, then trying to bully/guilt trip me into a relationship or sex.
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."

Suu

#237
May 05, 2011, 10:22:59 PM
In a related note, I've had to delete and block several creepers off of Facebook since my status went to single as well. Ugh. However, I don't think you have to deal with the same kind of basement dwellers I do. It's hard to find a nice catch in the geek world.

I got one on the hook right now, now I hope I don't break the line.
Sovereign Episkopos-Princess Kaousuu; Esq., Battle Nun, Bene Gesserit.
Our Lady of Perpetual Confusion; 1st Church of Discordia

"Add a dab of lavender to milk, leave town with an orange, and pretend you're laughing at it."

The Good Reverend Roger

#238
May 05, 2011, 10:40:03 PM
My next account is going to be hyper-abusive.

"Fuck off, I don't WANT to meet anyone.  I hate you all with the fire of a thousand suns."

Betcha I get loads of hits.  Mostly in Kentucky and Tennessee, where many women think their husbands don't love them if they don't beat them up once a month or so.

" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

#239
May 06, 2011, 08:06:14 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on May 05, 2011, 10:40:03 PM
My next account is going to be hyper-abusive.

"Fuck off, I don't WANT to meet anyone.  I hate you all with the fire of a thousand suns."

Betcha I get loads of hits.  Mostly in Kentucky and Tennessee, where many women think their husbands don't love them if they don't beat them up once a month or so.



:lulz: :horrormirth: TRUTH
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."

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