Author Topic: off on the wrong foot  (Read 2286 times)

Dildo Argentino

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off on the wrong foot
« on: January 15, 2012, 10:47:13 pm »
you know, it's weird

i am now, in just a few days of intermittent furious activity, in the majority of voiced opinion here, let's see

a racist
a sexist
a poor communicator
poorly educated in a crap school,
a dodger of criticism
intellectually challenged
a lame attempt at a bully

and it has been a trying few days, because i thought hard about those accusations, although at times i tried the strategy of being flippant about it, which didn't really work, either, but at least it helped me disengage

and see that i am none of those things, i know that, i've known myself for 43 fucking years, and increasingly, so i don't need a bunch of complete strangers to help me see myself as i really am

(in your terminology, of course, sticking my head back in the sand, well, you are welcome to that opinion)

so i am going to persevere, but i will be very busy for the next two weeks, so perhaps i'll just read whatever floats to the top and occasionally offer comment that is unlikely to offend

and i will be relentlessly chased down for a while by people still wishing me to eat more humble pie, but eventually they will give up if i just ignore them

and then we will see what happens

one thing is for sure, and this came to me when someone used that metaphor of "moving the goalposts" for the umpteenth time - i am not here to win

or lose
Not too keen on rigor, myself - reminds me of mortis

Don Coyote

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Re: off on the wrong foot
« Reply #1 on: January 15, 2012, 10:48:35 pm »
Sounds good to me.
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Demolition_Squid

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Re: off on the wrong foot
« Reply #2 on: January 15, 2012, 10:55:27 pm »
you know, it's weird

i am now, in just a few days of intermittent furious activity, in the majority of voiced opinion here, let's see

a racist
a sexist
a poor communicator
poorly educated in a crap school,
a dodger of criticism
intellectually challenged
a lame attempt at a bully

and it has been a trying few days, because i thought hard about those accusations, although at times i tried the strategy of being flippant about it, which didn't really work, either, but at least it helped me disengage

and see that i am none of those things, i know that, i've known myself for 43 fucking years, and increasingly, so i don't need a bunch of complete strangers to help me see myself as i really am

(in your terminology, of course, sticking my head back in the sand, well, you are welcome to that opinion)

so i am going to persevere, but i will be very busy for the next two weeks, so perhaps i'll just read whatever floats to the top and occasionally offer comment that is unlikely to offend

and i will be relentlessly chased down for a while by people still wishing me to eat more humble pie, but eventually they will give up if i just ignore them

and then we will see what happens

one thing is for sure, and this came to me when someone used that metaphor of "moving the goalposts" for the umpteenth time - i am not here to win

or lose

For what it is worth, I think the bolded is a large part of the problem.

Writing isn't easy. It is a medium which relies on precision of language, because even a small slip in grammar can radically change the interpretation taken away by the reader. Readers also inevitably read their own interpretation into the choice of words you use and style of what you write.

As you don't use conventional grammar (for good reasons or bad) you need to select your words even more carefully than normal. Unfortunately, conversation and debate online also encourages quick responses and you can feel pressured to respond before really making sure what you've written is exactly what you meant to say. This is especially true when a lot of people are disagreeing with you, because what you've said appears to be mindless drivel.

I would encourage you to take the break you need. You're at a busy time IRL if you are preparing to move to Bristol. I'd also respectfully say that whilst you may think of yourself as a fantastic communicator due to 43 years of positive reinforcement of this part of your personality, it has not manifested itself as a defining trait in your interactions here to date.

People's opinions around here are generally pretty fluid, though. If you just join in the conversations in future and have interesting, non-stupid things to say, the labels you don't like won't stick for long.
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By acting differently, we could have kept it so.

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Faust

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Re: off on the wrong foot
« Reply #3 on: January 15, 2012, 11:01:28 pm »
a racist - No, at least not consciously, then again no one is every fully free of latent racial prejudice
a sexist - See above, but more strongly
a poor communicator - Yes
poorly educated in a crap school, No idea, don't care
a dodger of criticism 100% yes you are
intellectually challenged No, but unwilling to entertain the possibility that you might be wrong
a lame attempt at a bully I don't think so, at least I haven't seen so.

feel free to add to the list

a windbag
an attention whore
condescending

Personally I want you to stay just so you might show signs of being willing to question your beliefs. It doesn't mean you have to come to other conclusions in all cases, but you really need to be willing to change your way of thinking if proven wrong.
Narrator: In time you will know the tragic extent of my failings

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navkat

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Re: off on the wrong foot
« Reply #4 on: January 15, 2012, 11:04:56 pm »
I think you're self-victimizing a bit. No one believes all those things as intrinsic parts of your identity, just that you may have come accross as such at times.

You should chill out, stop preaching and get the joke. Join the fun.

Phox

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Re: off on the wrong foot
« Reply #5 on: January 15, 2012, 11:06:24 pm »
and i will be relentlessly chased down for a while by people still wishing me to eat more humble pie, but eventually they will give up if i just ignore them
You know, it's funny. I am torn between actually giving you yet another chance to say something with depth and critical thought, and saying "That's not how it works." For one, I am a might picky about people who decide it's okay to throw out patently false information to people who know better, and then cry foul when asked to back up their claims and demand that they be refuted instead. I also dislike backpedaling, ignoring arguments in favor back-biting, down talking to people who have offered legitimate, non-condescending viewpoints, and general rhetorical chicanery being passed off as "debate". For two, we have long memories and hold grudges like motherfuckers. See point one.

On the other hand, I am legitimately a nice person, who foolishly believes that people are smarter than I sometimes give them credit, and despite the evidence to the contrary, continue to hold out hope that you MIGHT actually be worth talking to, if you didn't have baseless, ridiculous ideas in your head that escape out of your fingers.

navkat

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Re: off on the wrong foot
« Reply #6 on: January 15, 2012, 11:39:27 pm »
There's a lot of pressure here to be clever. I empathize. But the way you were going about it was preachy and contrived.

The only thing pretty constant in this crowd is that we have a pretty consistent reaction to any theory that requires any sort of "faith." If you can't prove what you're presenting with a double-blind, citation, or solid evidence then you'd better be prepared to present yourself with a rational argument and a healthy dose of self-skepticism. I've had my ass handed to me a *lot* on this board...especially when I went through my Glenn Beck phase.

If you take everything in stride, be prepared to admit when you're wrong and either laugh at yourself or LET IT GO, this board will make you better. People need opposition and challenge to grow up mentally and these folks will get you into practice of mentally screaming "CITATION NEEDED" to yourSELF everytime you start to open your mouth about something cracked. And laughing absurdly about the rest

That's a pretty good place to be.

Shelve the homeopathy for a while, read the stuff on Literate Chaotic, lower your post count rate and listen for a while. You'll know when to jump in.

Welcome aboard.
« Last Edit: January 15, 2012, 11:42:23 pm by navkat »

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

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Re: off on the wrong foot
« Reply #7 on: January 16, 2012, 12:08:23 am »
May I suggest that if someone says "what do you mean by that?" that you simply explain what you mean? Because if you don't explain what you mean, people have nothing to go on but assumptions based on your initial, unclear statement.

It seems as if you really, really have some resistance to being questioned or clarifying your statements, because you have gotten extremely defensive when asked to clarify. You might want to think about that.
« Last Edit: January 16, 2012, 12:14:23 am by Nigel »
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Iron Sulfide

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Re: off on the wrong foot
« Reply #8 on: January 16, 2012, 12:12:29 am »
FWIW, this holist reminds me a little of myself when I first joined here. I wasn't, er, Pinealist, per se. Pretty damn close, though.

which led me to re-examining my older posts, even (embarassingly) in Literate Chaotic (pages 20-23 make me cringe now).

Of course, I was 17-18 at the time, and holist says he's 43. While some of his behavior, to me, indicates a troll, I've many times ended up in the same situation here, making the same choices, with no troll intended. And it's rather easy to fall into a reactionary state and become defensive, particularly when defending an unpopular idea. So I'll reserve my judgement for something more conclusive.

holist: my experience in talking about the absurd/paranormal/alternative/etc... in the particular region of the interweb is that you're best off if you can discuss the topic at hand in plain, direct language that says what it means and means what it says. If you claim something that isn't generally accepted, be prepared to offer evidence more than eye witness and anecdotes, or prepare to be laughed at.
Ya' stupid Yank.

The Good Reverend Roger

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Re: off on the wrong foot
« Reply #9 on: January 16, 2012, 01:03:26 am »
Life's tough.  Wear a hat.

YOU are worrying too much about what WE say.  You also came here to preach, which is kind of like bringing coals to Newcastle, but you are preaching bad signal.  You are preaching how you'd LIKE the universe to be, not the way it ACTUALLY IS.

But why bother examining these things, when you can just fill your head full of bullshit and pretend it's some sort of knowledge?

Our bullshit filters are effective, but we never advertised them as pleasant.
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Iron Sulfide

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Re: off on the wrong foot
« Reply #10 on: January 16, 2012, 01:35:55 am »
I just finished reading his entire post count.

Definitely leaning more towards troll, now. But we'll see.
Ya' stupid Yank.

East Coast Hustle

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Re: off on the wrong foot
« Reply #11 on: January 16, 2012, 03:13:28 am »
I'm still willing to give him the benefit of the doubt and hoping he can see where he went wrong in his first go-round here.

I've written his buddy off, though. Holist seems sincere, if misguided. Subsymbolic just seems like a pointless jerk.
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Epimetheus

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Re: off on the wrong foot
« Reply #12 on: January 16, 2012, 03:17:15 am »
I'm down for further intelligent discussion and (mutual) laughter. Wish it would generally be more peaceful / less noisy, although I have no desire for anyone to communicate in any way other than genuinely.
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East Coast Hustle

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Re: off on the wrong foot
« Reply #13 on: January 16, 2012, 03:19:19 am »
One thing, holist, that you should probably be aware of is that this place is both incredibly critical and incredibly forgiving and that insulting personal attacks are rarely actually meant personally.
Rabid Colostomy Hole Jammer of the Coming Apocalypse™

The Devil is in the details; God is in the nuance.


Some yahoo yelled at me, saying 'GIVE ME LIBERTY OR GIVE ME DEATH', and I thought, "I'm feeling generous today.  Why not BOTH?"

Thurnez Isa

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Re: off on the wrong foot
« Reply #14 on: January 16, 2012, 03:54:08 am »
you know, it's weird

i am now, in just a few days of intermittent furious activity, in the majority of voiced opinion here, let's see

a racist
a sexist
a poor communicator
poorly educated in a crap school,
a dodger of criticism
intellectually challenged
a lame attempt at a bully


and you smell
 :)
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Abandon all hope, you who enter here.

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