Stupid luck

[The Wizard Joseph]

From the content of this post I see a lot of similarity between us Twid.  In the earlier parts of my life I found myself consistently influenced by others.  I had lots of vision, but almost no initiative for my own ideas. It also so happens that we are nearly the same age.  I just turned 30 a month and odd days ago.  I'll post about my crap another day in another thread.

I may have more to say later, but am unsure that I can say anything useful.  I sincerely wish you the best in you endeavors, and hope your "Stupid Luck" continues to hold out! 

BTW, what would be a proper name suitable to a kinda benevolent god of stupid luck?

[Nephew Twiddleton]

My inclinations is to say Just Kidding or Gotcha. But ill ponder if there is apreexisting god that fits the bill

[Nephew Twiddleton]

Manannan mac lir which i will explain in about trn min when i get home from my guitarists other bands show (on foot now)

[Nephew Twiddleton]

DISCLAIMER: Yeah, I'm a semi-theistic polytheist. Pretty sure this is established but in context of thread I feel it bears repeating for the sake of the metaphor. Also, I have no set theology (except on one matter), so where the semi comes in is up to my mood, except on Wednesdays when I am most definitely and atheist, or occasionally, a cacotheist. The thing I'm about to relate refers to the birth of my primary deity, Lugh Lamhfada/Lugh Ioldanach (He is my primary due to the fact that he is a musician. His Greco-Roman equivalent is Hermes/Mercurius). This is an Irish god, as is Manannan (Greco-Roman equivalent is Neptunus), but Lugh is not the point here. Manannan is. I also deliberately chose a non-Greco-Roman deity for this purpose for reasons I can't really figure out. I will also use (possibly poor) Greco-Roman cognates where appropriate for more accessible mythological context

So, ok, a long time ago in an Ireland far, far away, there was there was this blacksmith dude named Cian (no cognate. Pronounced KEE-uhn) and his two triplet brothers. They're not important here. Anyway, Balor (cognate: some weird cross between a Titan and Cyclops in the X-Men sense, since one of his eyes was poisoned. Spelling is archaic, so as far as I can tell it's pronounced as on the label) had some sort of blacksmithy dealing with the three brothers. A cow was stolen from them by Balor and taken back to Tory Island. Now it should be noted that Balor's Druids once predicted that he would be killed by his grandson like Oedipus or Jason or some shit like that so he locked up his daughter on Tory Island (which is off the coast of Donegal. Also, the Titans here belong to a race called the Fomorians, which loosely translates to "under-sea people" who oppress the Tuatha De Danann, who are the gods proper of Ireland). So of course he locks up his daughter Eithne (pronounced EN-ya. Yes. Enya. translation, I believe is kernel) like any mythological spag would do in such a situation.

Well, Cian has a stolen cow, and Balor has a hidden daughter. Cian just wants his fucking cow back, because, I don't know, it's an expensive cow. I'm a city dude. I don't know about the value of cows. How's he going to get his cow back? Oh hey, I'm Manannan mac Lir (MAH-nah-nawn mahk LEER). I have a magic boat. I also have a Druidess who will magic you up some cross-dressing (yes, magical cross-dressing). Let's go to Tory Island, since I have a boat and I have no reason to go there other than to bring you there because why not?


Well, good old Cian gets a makeover from the Druidess Birog (BEER-ogue) and hey, there's this virgin chick in the tower who's kinda hot. I'm going to see what happens if I reveal to this woman who has never seen a man my manliness. Oh, also, she's apparently ovulating at the exact same time. Ok, Manannan, I fucked Enya and got my cow back, oh and I gave Enya a ring in the likely even that she gets pregnant so that my child, most likely a son considering these kinds of stories, will be recognizable to me when I meet up with him again as is probably 100% going to happen.

Well, Enya had an abortion. No just kidding. She had triplets. Because triplets run in the father's side of the family. Balor thinks to himself, "I'm definitely going to die now... unless we kill the babies." (spoiler alert. Balor gets killed by his grandson, but we've seen this story before, so it's not really news). "yo, henchmen, I want you to literally throw the babies out with the bathwater. Take those fuckers out to the shore and chuck them in." Well, don't you know, on the way one baby fell out. This baby was rescued by Aphrodite Thor Amaterasu Manannan mac Lir. Oh by the way, Manannan is Tuatha, just like Cian. But Manannan has no opinion on the Fomorian oppression. Anyway, he sees this baby with the ring (don't ask me how this one triplet got the ring. It's a fucking myth) is brought up and instructed by Manannan, who apparently can't be bothered with hanging out with other Dananns or telling them about this mystery kid until he makes his triumphant debut (this kid of course is: Lugh Lamhada [LOO LAW-watha (Lugh Long Hand)] and Lugh Ioldanach [LOO ILL-dawn-ukh (Lugh, skilled at everything)], my primary deity, who being skilled at everything is also an accomplished guitarist who has played with the likes of Joe Satriani, Carlos Santana, and that guy playing at the bar who is the tits but will never go anywhere).

Also, who do you think taught him everything? The Man, Emcee Lir. Where did Lugh get that totally awesome yacht whose helm is telepathically linked to its captain? Oh yeah, that guy. Totally awesome sword for slicing through armor like butter? M to the Lizzle. When Lugh was an adolescent  destined to free the Tuatha De Danann from those Fomorian bastards? Some sort of seafarer needed to get him to the Irish mainland so that he could show off his schmancy ring and go "hey motherfuckers, I'm good at everything, make me your king."

It should also be worth noting that I also revere Manannan as a tertiary deity, not because of any of this, but rather because I see him as a psychopomp and expect him to be the first face I see when I kick off and get chucked into the ground. Also, he has three legs and the Isle of Man is named after him (also I love parentheses).

[Phox]

Perseus. You were thinking of Perseus as the dude was s'posed to kill his grand daddy... and then got rescued by.... Poseidon.

[Nephew Twiddleton]

Perseus. You were thinking of Perseus as the dude was s'posed to kill his grand daddy... and then got rescued by.... Poseidon.

It seems that European sea gods have some sort of orphanage in place.

[Phox]

Perseus. You were thinking of Perseus as the dude was s'posed to kill his grand daddy... and then got rescued by.... Poseidon.

It seems that European sea gods have some sort of orphanage in place.

I know, right? But anyway, that's a pretty cool story, though I'm not so sure that Manannan is quite the god of stupid luck. He seems, to me, more like the god of deus ex machina. Which, while similar, is not quite the same, follow?

[Nephew Twiddleton]

Perseus. You were thinking of Perseus as the dude was s'posed to kill his grand daddy... and then got rescued by.... Poseidon.

It seems that European sea gods have some sort of orphanage in place.

I know, right? But anyway, that's a pretty cool story, though I'm not so sure that Manannan is quite the god of stupid luck. He seems, to me, more like the god of deus ex machina. Which, while similar, is not quite the same, follow?

Hmmm. Possibly. I might have to rethink.

[Nephew Twiddleton]

Maybe Cian's the god of stupid luck since stuff just happens to him. He comes to a rather unfortunate end though, which allows for a nifty bit of revenge for Lugh and more magical goodies to kill the Fomorians.

Also, I realize now that the ring bit wasn't Lugh, it was Bres. An easy mistake to make- both are half Fomorian and half Tuatha, and I consider them to be opposites- Lugh can be said to represent summer and Bres winter.

[Don Coyote]

M to the lizzle......

[Phox]

Maybe Cian's the god of stupid luck since stuff just happens to him. He comes to a rather unfortunate end though, which allows for a nifty bit of revenge for Lugh and more magical goodies to kill the Fomorians.

Also, I realize now that the ring bit wasn't Lugh, it was Bres. An easy mistake to make- both are half Fomorian and half Tuatha, and I consider them to be opposites- Lugh can be said to represent summer and Bres winter.

Cian might work, yes, though seems more like a patron saint of stupid luck than a full on god. Which might even be better, though. 

[Triple Zero]

How about the main character in Being There?

[Nephew Twiddleton]

Not familiar with it?

[Doktor Howl]

I wouldn't wish the Irish pantheon on anyone.

[The Wizard Joseph]

Maybe Cian's the god of stupid luck since stuff just happens to him. He comes to a rather unfortunate end though, which allows for a nifty bit of revenge for Lugh and more magical goodies to kill the Fomorians.

Very neat story Twid!

Maybe this Cian's right for the stupid luck bit.  Maybe he's just living on credit though.  Hmm... makes me think that the stupid part of stupid luck might be more like getting a karma loan.  Get all your nice, happy, auspicious events early in life, and only have to pay up by having a truly horrible end.  I think there could be a real market there if there was some way to make it happen! 

Charmed Life Ensurence Agency.  "Don't pay 'till your last day"

Please sign here, prick index finger and press here for print, and please allow up to ten days to process the hair sample from your eldest child or next of kin.

If I could get someone like Loki to underwrite this it would be awesome.  Damn my agnosticism!  It makes it almost impossible to know who to Call and whether or not I dialed the right Number.