Stupid luck

[Nephew Twiddleton]

So, since Villager and I were concert hungover from Rammstein last night, she and I hunted around the internet for apartments together. Well, she came across a posting in Chinese that I ran through google and got this:

Single room occupancy in the three-bedroom, large living room, large kitchen, quiet, tidy and clean, room size is about 15 square, a bed, desk and wardrobe. 5 minutes walk to the red line subway station of Wollaston station to UMASS the Boston.The surrounding park, tennis courts and supermarket. Leased to a single Chinese scholar or student, no alcohol, no smoking, no bad habits, hygiene. 450 knife price, including water and a short rental or long-term lease can be.

So, me, deciding to be a bit of a smart as, typed up a response into google and put in this (retranslated back into English, reconstructed from poor translation where needed):

Hello, I apologize if the translation is poor. I use Google. You can tell I am not a Chinese scholar, but can also be, then maybe I can be in a better way to write this message. Since you are fluent, perhaps you can help me with my homework, if I decided to become a Chinese scholar. I think your condition(s), you do not want smoking, drinking, bad habits or health hygeine. I can meet most, although I might have trouble with not born bathing. If I think I need a shower other place to go for two days. With alcohol, I will do the same, because I'm Irish, we need to survive not seriousbecause, the water is toxic [to us].Please let me know if you are interested, I hope you have a great day.

Well, I'll be damned I got this reply in English:

Hi Kevin,
>
> we still have one bedroom available now .
>
> when do you want to move in ? How long will you stay here?
>
> Can you intruduce some about yourself?  Student or work?
>
> Thanks!
>
> We understant your Chinese after google translating to English 。。。
>
> Andy

To which I responded:

Hi Andy,

Well, I'm a bit of a joker, as should be obvious. I work part time at
Brigham and Women's Hospital, and I'm also a gigging musician. I'm 30
years old, and I often stay over at my girlfriend's apartment in
Dorchester over the weekends. I'm a little shy at first but get along
well with most people. I would hope to find a place to live by the end
of the month but would be able to move in as soon as next week. I
would stay as long as I can. My girlfriend and I are in a pretty
stable long-term relationship, and she doesn't want to move out of her
place until she's ready to buy a house, and I hate moving, so I'm on
board with that. I probably won't actually learn Chinese. Well, I
might like to pick up some phrases here and there!

To be honest, I didn't think you would actually respond, but if you
like we can set up a time for me to come by and check the place out,
introduce myself and see where it goes.

Thanks!
-Kevin

I guess being a smart ass pays off sometimes.

Aside from that, I'm checking out two other places this weekend.

[Triple Zero]

Not familiar with it?

It's actually a rather short novel. I read it for my English literature list in high school. I quite enjoyed it, actually.

The main character is a slightly retarded person, who keeps quiet most of the time because he usually doesn't quite understand what's exactly going on. People around him mistake this confusion for extreme thoughtfulness, so that the few times he does open his mouth, they interpret it as a brilliant insight. This takes upon a life of its own and he becomes famous and/or advisor to a powerful political figure, or something like that (I forgot what exactly) and the simplest things, when they make no sense, are assumed to either be joking or probably too cryptic and intelligent for them to truly understand, because after all, don't you know who this guy is??! Cruising upwards in society, while all he's doing is just Being There.

I believe it's told in first person perspective, IIRC.

[Triple Zero]

Single room occupancy in the three-bedroom, large living room, large kitchen, quiet, tidy and clean, room size is about 15 square, a bed, desk and wardrobe. 5 minutes walk to the red line subway station of Wollaston station to UMASS the Boston.The surrounding park, tennis courts and supermarket. Leased to a single Chinese scholar or student, no alcohol, no smoking, no bad habits, hygiene. 450 knife price, including water and a short rental or long-term lease can be.

But it's 15 square what? Feet? Meter? Yard? Femtolightyear?

[Nephew Twiddleton]

I think (hope) they mean its 15x15ft and not actually 15sqft. Otherwise im going to say no.

[Nephew Twiddleton]

So ive been thinking about the implications of cian being the god of stupid luck. And ive come to the conclusion that while you get a free ride on the bus something unpleasant awaits you at the last stop. I think im going to get off the bus now.