The Parlor Problem

[Salty]

It doesn't really take much for people to make jokes about happy endings.

It's the default position most of your friends will take when the subject comes up. Not decent people's friends, people that would associate with you argumentative freaks and perverts.

Some therapists get very upset thinking about the parlors, some don't give a damn, and none-too-few engage of shaming of their own. I don't have any hard feelings toward those people. As far as I can see it's one of the safest forms of prostitution. These women are in from cold, they have a building where men are much less likely to get rough, and the whole ordeal very nearly a victimless ordeal.

Until you come along stuff like this:

http://anchorage.craigslist.org/thp/3145663310.html
http://anchorage.craigslist.org/thp/3145441959.html

Or, even better:

http://www.rubmaps.com/

The last one always leaves me a bit sick. These assholes are reviewing these women like motherfucking books on amazon.

Places like these most definitely engage in sex trafficking, mostly from Asia as far as I can tell.

In contrast you have stuff like this:
http://happyendingz.blogspot.com/

Now she definitely does not like the word prostitution. And when you put your hands all over another persons body it really can seem like it's not. It seems like the most natural thing to do, really. In fact, a lot of what goes into sex DOES happen in a massage. But I think that's based on the perspective of a sexually repressed culture. Touch is a funny thing, and it does things to your brain you can't actually have a conversation with yourself about.

What is your view on low-level prostitution like this? Is there such a thing as less-harmless prostitution?

[Suu]

Indoor prostitution was legal in RI up until last year I think, but, obviously, after checking out the Rubmaps site and seeing about 10 Providence "spas" pop right up, as well as the listings in the Phoenix, it's no surprise that, once again, a loophole was found.

Some get busted, some don't. Stuff like that here is lucrative business for the guidos running the state, so I do what the rest of the citizens do, and that's ignore their existence. Rhode Island is a state of KYFMS on such things.

[Phox]

I knew a woman with a private massage practice that got busted for that sort of thing and walked away with a slap on the wrist.

To be honest, I'm not sure how I feel about that sort of thing. On one level, it's a matter of personal choice, if the people giving these massages want to cater to those sorts of folks, then well, they can deal with it, as was the case with my acquaintance. On the other hand, if there's trafficking involved, I have to wonder if those girls have that choice at all? I'm okay with selling sex, but not okay with selling other people, if that makes sense.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

I think that if the power dynamic was altogether different, and no human trafficking was involved, I would have a very different perspective on it. Being in that line of work could be seen as a compassionate act, but the way things are right now, it really just isn't, usually.

[Anna Mae Bollocks]

I dunno...even without the trafficking angle, it would take an unreal amount of compassion to give an erotic massage to whatever creep happened to wander in off the street and swipe a credit card. 

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

A lot of people have a calling to compassionate careers that deal with the creeps off the street... it's just that in the current paradigm, it's almost impossible for sex worker to be that kind of compassionate career, rather than an exploited one.

[Placid Dingo]

Pragmatically, the main priority should be protecting the practitioners and I honestly suspect, and have said as much before, that a regulated industry is the best way to do that.

Human trafficking is the main concern.

[Anna Mae Bollocks]

A lot of people have a calling to compassionate careers that deal with the creeps off the street... it's just that in the current paradigm, it's almost impossible for sex worker to be that kind of compassionate career, rather than an exploited one.

Well, yeah, and I can see the non-sexual stuff. Everybody should have access to food, housing, medical care, legal aid, etc.
I just don't see how doing sexual stuff with guys who make your skin crawl in that situation isn't exploitation.

[Phox]

A lot of people have a calling to compassionate careers that deal with the creeps off the street... it's just that in the current paradigm, it's almost impossible for sex worker to be that kind of compassionate career, rather than an exploited one.

Well, yeah, and I can see the non-sexual stuff. Everybody should have access to food, housing, medical care, legal aid, etc.
I just don't see how doing sexual stuff with guys who make your skin crawl in that situation isn't exploitation.

If the person being paid is the one who is making the decision as to whether or not they perform a sex act, then it's not. A person is making a choice as to what they, personally, are willing to do. Given that this situation is probably all but non-existent in the sex industry, it's kind of moot, but hypothetically, it  could be non-exploitative.

[Faust]

As someone who goes into a catatonic state of bliss when having a massage I feel a happy ending would ruin the experience for me.
I've never gotten a massage from a stranger though so I don't have any frame of reference.

As a prostitution act, in principle it seems safer than others but it is bound to attract the same problems as regular prostitution such as the issue of safety of the girls, is a pimp involved and as soon as you get to that level you get the drugs and human trafficking problems.

I guess I have no problem with this as it is independent and the girl is in charge with no one above her making her feel obliged to do it.

[Anna Mae Bollocks]

A lot of people have a calling to compassionate careers that deal with the creeps off the street... it's just that in the current paradigm, it's almost impossible for sex worker to be that kind of compassionate career, rather than an exploited one.

Well, yeah, and I can see the non-sexual stuff. Everybody should have access to food, housing, medical care, legal aid, etc.
I just don't see how doing sexual stuff with guys who make your skin crawl in that situation isn't exploitation.

If the person being paid is the one who is making the decision as to whether or not they perform a sex act, then it's not. A person is making a choice as to what they, personally, are willing to do. Given that this situation is probably all but non-existent in the sex industry, it's kind of moot, but hypothetically, it  could be non-exploitative.

Well yeah, but it comes back to that whole issue of performing sex acts because the alternative is being homeless or dope sick or whatever.

[Placid Dingo]

Some quotes from a PDF I stumbled accross (honest, I swear!); It's from an 'adult massage parlor', and made for would be patrons. Remember, this is Aus, therefor legal.

"10 Tips to Guarantee a Great Massage"

Herp Derp is famous for the explorer's lounge and fresh new ladies!

We attract many guys who have never been anywhere before and lots of new
girls who've never done anything naughty!

We are not looking for "experienced people" in either category!

The point of view of a brand new Massage Girl?

She wants to please and has been trained to please.

She expects the client to have a good shower and be all clean, fresh and pink for
his rub down.

She has been told to expect the client to touch her breasts, but only gently.

She expects that some clients will attempt to push her personal boundaries and
she knows how to give a series of warnings to the adventurous client who may
continuously ask her out.

She wants to learn about how different men will react to her touch and to try out
the hot oil. She will massage for about half of the period of time on the client's
back and then roll him over to do some of the front and then proceed to do the
last part. She expects he will give her some guidance with how he likes it but she
doesn't like bad language.

She expects the client to have a good opinion of her efforts and be so thrilled that
he will come back another day.

When ladies apply for a start with us they quite often say they would NOT go to
another place. They come to us because the advertising says "NO SEX" or
because someone has told them we do not push the ladies to do more.

Some ladies don't mind if their friends and family know they work at Herp
because they are happy within the bounds of the No Sex reputation. All our ladies
become friends and share this ethic. If a new lady starts with us and she wants to
offer more she is soon moved along to protect the reputation of the others.

Most brothels go to a lot of trouble to make sure that clients do not run into each
other in the hallways. Having the big lounge area at Herp is different. The Herp Derp visitor is usually not uncomfortable. Anyway, it's harmless fun for grownups, so who cares, it's only A NAKED MASSAGE with A HAPPY ENDING!

After a few weeks at Herp Derp our ladies become good little talkers when
sitting in the spas, even though many of them are rather quiet in the club area.
Men on the loose and out of touch with relationships find that talking in the spas
is good therapy and frees up the tongue.

Some guys just want the talk to be "nothing of much consequence" and then give
themselves over to the massage - they say it is a good way to step back from
their busy daily life and relax. It's certainly a great boost to your business.

How to "Make the best impression with a Lady"

If your friend came to you and said "I have a date with a nice lady - tell me, how
I should act?" You would say to him "Be yourself, don't be a goose, don't pretend
to be something you are not!"

Well, take your own advice. - don't pretend.

Often the massage lady says, "that guy was really nice, he was just natural."

She likes to talk about the normal things that happen in life, at the movies, or
what's on TV.

The whole point of this is that you don't have to be a superstar - just act naturally
and give the odd genuine compliment. I mean genuine. Australians have the best
bullshit meters in the World. If it is a bullshit compliment you are being a GOOSE.
So just be yourself, and be nice!

You have to prove you are NORMAL!

From time to time men put on an act and really misbehave or make degrading
remarks. There is always a guy like this at a strip show. Most women have seen
men at their worst at some time.

It is good to be aware that even when the ladies are happy serving you and being
polite they are at the same time on the lookout to see if you are going to turn out
to be okay or not.

It is best to set their minds at rest early and prove you are normal by being
polite. They will be relieved when they realize you really are okay.

Most meetings have a hospitality ritual, which centers around the offering of a
drink or beverage. Take this opportunity to be grateful and friendly. It is the
moment, which leads to regular conversation. It's a getting to know you time.

Believe me, it is the moment ignorant men cannot get past. Often a lady walks
back to the bar saying "You should have heard what he just said!"

So, what I'm saying here is that because of the bad behavior of men in general,
you have a great opportunity to be loved by women! All you have to do is some
small talk while she has time to decide if you have a dark side. You can mention
that you heard we serve a nice chocolate drink or perhaps ask for a juice in a
glass. If she is appealing, why not ask her to join you in a drink.

Tips

If you should wish to tip, don't tip early as there is an implication that she is
expected to do extra. This actually distracts the lady and minimizes any extra
effort, which might happen on her part. Ladies do try hard to make your stay
most memorable, as they would like to have repeats from men they get to know.
Not many men tip or are expected to. It is a big thrill for a massage lady to get a
tip at the end!

"Buyers Remorse" is a real condition. For most men is a dreadful feeling that you
have wasted the rent money yet again and that the lady is at fault. After the end
bit this results in clients being curt and rude to a beautiful woman who has
knocked herself out for them. Some men at this point are asked to not come back
so - bear in mind you have just been chucked out of the best place and there is
no return as the ladies all talk to each other. Be nice and if you intend to tip make
sure you follow through - especially if you even hinted at it.

How to "Not act stupid with a Herp lady"
The first thing a new lady learns is "The customer is not a friend of the boss!"
Let me put that another way: If "Stupid" was an extreme sport "I'm a friend of
the boss" would be way out there, on a long bungee, not tied on.
The most frequently said stupid thing is "I'M A FRIEND OF THE BOSS."
Almost as stupid:
My friend got sex here.
I got sex with your friend here.
I go out with girls from here all the time.
I can't come if you don't have sex with me.
It doesn't count if I put it in just a little bit.
It's your fault I'm sad for not having sex with me.
I don't want a massage, just play with my dick all the time.
I will be unhappy if I can't go down on you.
Everyone else does it.
Now, even though there is a little humour in this, you and I have gone to all kinds
of places in our lives and said stupid things or asked the stupid questions. Hire
car drivers say the most frequently asked stupid question is "Have you got a TV
in there." This doesn't seem stupid to anyone else except a hire car driver.

What if you run into a lady away from Herp?

She will be hoping you are discreet and that you don't even make eye contact.

She is terrified that her two Worlds will collide. Ladies do, from time to time go
out with clients but there are enough disaster stories around to put them off.
Just do her a big favour and give her space.

It follows that clients who pursue working ladies will often end up with regrets and of
course the last thing you want is to have Big John and the Police drop over to discuss
your stalking.

When things go wrong - it's your fault!
If she is upset in any way - it's your fault.
This is the whole point of it. The massage lady is sweet and delicate and happy to
enjoy your company and willingly do the happy ending!
You have to do your part. Be nice!
There is no other ending other than the happy one.
It's a NAKED MASSAGE WITH A HAPPY ENDING!

Obviously it's not actually called Herp Derp. I just wasn't out to advertise the place.

I just wanted to post this to show there are some places which seem sincere in making an effort to look after the workers, etc. I just found the PDF interesting; not going to try to put a spin on it either way.

[Freeky]

I've never seen any kind of advertisment that says if their emplyee is upset, it is the customer's fault.  That seems pretty cool.

[Anna Mae Bollocks]

I saw it as a veneer of faux concern for women who are expected to sell hand jobs and let these guys grope their tits.
Maybe they're esteemed slightly more than street hookers who sell blow jobs, but not quite as much as the girls dancing in the tittie flops. 
In any case, I wouldn't wish that job on anybody.

[Salty]

No.

I mean, feel free to view that in any way you wish.
But there is clearly a large difference between random street walkers and what those women are doing.
Did you read that blog I posted?

Because there are some pretty good, real life examples of that difference. For one thing, I think there's a huge difference between a hand-job of a dude who is inert and, you know, any other sex act.

So, you seem to be of the mind that anyone who engages in sex work is at the same level of a random street walker, that there is no difference anywhere along those lines?