News:

PD.com: We occur at random among your children.

Main Menu

ROGER IS IN CHARGE OF MY LOVE LIFE ITT

Started by Mesozoic Mister Nigel, April 19, 2013, 10:11:07 PM

Previous topic - Next topic
Print
Go Down Pages1 2 3 4 ... 7
User actions

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

April 19, 2013, 10:11:07 PM
Roger, this is my latest OK Cupid exchange with an eligible hottie. What should I say?

Me:
QuoteYour profile is so compellingly existential! We should gaze into the abyss together. To say yes, stand in a hallway. Pick up a shoe, and then drop it. Cry.

Him:
QuoteOk.i did it.yea that felt good

Me:
QuoteI'm all about facilitating catharsis.

Him:
QuoteSounds great.is it nap time yet?

Me:
QuotePotato.

Him:
QuoteI say potato

It's pronounced different

Me:
QuoteHow about the other nightshades?

Him:
QuoteSure.whatever works

NOW WHAT?
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."

The Good Reverend Roger

#1
April 19, 2013, 10:26:34 PM
brb, idiots

I'm gonna have fun with this.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

#2
April 19, 2013, 10:32:25 PM
I had a good one from a guy but he turned out to have MS so I didn't feel right unleashing the wrath upon him.
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."

The Good Reverend Roger

#3
April 19, 2013, 10:37:30 PM
Dear <insert name>,

While I love nothing more than abyss gazing, dadaistic behavior, and crying for no reason other than the monumental load of angst riding across my broken & battered shoulders, I feel that your unorthodox way of pronouncing "potato" is unfortunate and a deal-killer.

You see, way back when we started this company, we decided on some core values that would ensure our position as world leaders in the OKC industry.  One of those values is the use of the English language, which is non-negotiable and most definitely non-subjective.  Your flagrant abuse of the language makes the Queen of England cry, and she seems like such a nice old lady.

No, your willingness to abuse the elderly in such a manner speaks volumes with respect to your character, and I feel that you and I are thus incompatible.  If I may offer some advice, though, for your on-going search for someone emo enough to suit you, perhaps you could go hang out at the local mental hospital, or perhaps the hipster coffee & wine bar of your choice.

So while it may be "nap time", it is not the nap you were expecting.  It is me, sleeping peacefully, while you wank into your happy sock until dawn, weeping miserably because yet another woman has seen you for what you are, and refuses to get on the tallbike with you.

I do hope we can remain friends.  We can talk about the abyss, now and then...But only online.  People like you put me right up a fucking tree in person, and I have enough legal bills as it is.

Love & Nightshades,
NIGEL
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

#4
April 19, 2013, 10:53:55 PM
BRILLIANT

SENT!
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."

Eater of Clowns

#5
April 19, 2013, 10:54:48 PM
This is the most adorable thing ever.
Quote from: Pippa Twiddleton on December 22, 2012, 01:06:36 AM
EoC, you are the bane of my existence.

Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on March 07, 2014, 01:18:23 AM
EoC doesn't make creepy.

EoC makes creepy worse.

Quote
the afflicted persons get hold of and consume carrots even in socially quite unacceptable situations.

Anna Mae Bollocks

#6
April 19, 2013, 11:14:14 PM
"happy sock"  :lulz:

Now I want to make a bad, dabby painting of happy little socks. And Jergens and a couple of battered jack mags.
Scantily-Clad Inspector of Gigantic and Unnecessary Cashews, Texas Division

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

#7
April 19, 2013, 11:22:51 PM
Quote from: stelz on April 19, 2013, 11:14:14 PM
"happy sock"  :lulz:

Now I want to make a bad, dabby painting of happy little socks. And Jergens and a couple of battered jack mags.

You could make a LIVING off that.
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."

Anna Mae Bollocks

#8
April 19, 2013, 11:28:36 PM
Quote from: M. Nigel Salt on April 19, 2013, 11:22:51 PM
Quote from: stelz on April 19, 2013, 11:14:14 PM
"happy sock"  :lulz:

Now I want to make a bad, dabby painting of happy little socks. And Jergens and a couple of battered jack mags.

You could make a LIVING off that.

Nigel, I'm the kind of person who would actually try to do that.  :lol:
*goes to inventory art supplies*
Scantily-Clad Inspector of Gigantic and Unnecessary Cashews, Texas Division

The Good Reverend Roger

#9
April 19, 2013, 11:47:29 PM
Quote from: M. Nigel Salt on April 19, 2013, 10:53:55 PM
BRILLIANT

SENT!

More hipsters, pls.

I've got The Holies™.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

#10
April 20, 2013, 05:03:20 AM
Quote from: stelz on April 19, 2013, 11:28:36 PM
Quote from: M. Nigel Salt on April 19, 2013, 11:22:51 PM
Quote from: stelz on April 19, 2013, 11:14:14 PM
"happy sock"  :lulz:

Now I want to make a bad, dabby painting of happy little socks. And Jergens and a couple of battered jack mags.

You could make a LIVING off that.

Nigel, I'm the kind of person who would actually try to do that.  :lol:
*goes to inventory art supplies*

DO IT DO IT DO IT.
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

#11
April 20, 2013, 05:08:20 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on April 19, 2013, 11:47:29 PM
Quote from: M. Nigel Salt on April 19, 2013, 10:53:55 PM
BRILLIANT

SENT!

More hipsters, pls.

I've got The Holies™.

MrBlueEyes6900 says,

QuoteSup baby
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

#12
April 20, 2013, 05:11:03 AM
nicepeeps says: 4u

Quotehello,

my name is rich..my friends call me rich..and my enemies call me dick ...its all good...smiling..

great pictures..love the energy you have for the beauty of life's simple offerings.. but are you really into outdoors?..love it...

I realize I can be a little over wealming at first glance...my shear size and muscles are amazing...hahaha....just asking for to be a friend first..ok is kissing ok..smiling ...just looking for a partner of friendship that will become a partner of life to explore everything this environment has to offer ... but asking for you to get to really know me and you will see how great my shuffleboard skills are before not considering me.....hahaha

have a great day

cheers
rich
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."

The Good Reverend Roger

#13
April 20, 2013, 05:14:27 AM
I shall be in my office tomorrow, ON SATURDAY.  I shall harness the rage and hate of being in my office ON SATURDAY, and write appropriate responses.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Eater of Clowns

#14
April 20, 2013, 05:25:40 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on April 20, 2013, 05:14:27 AM
I shall be in my office tomorrow, ON SATURDAY.  I shall harness the rage and hate of being in my office ON SATURDAY, and write appropriate responses.

Gee, Roger, you must be a Good American and Truly Dedicated to Your Job to go to work on a Saturday!
Quote from: Pippa Twiddleton on December 22, 2012, 01:06:36 AM
EoC, you are the bane of my existence.

Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on March 07, 2014, 01:18:23 AM
EoC doesn't make creepy.

EoC makes creepy worse.

Quote
the afflicted persons get hold of and consume carrots even in socially quite unacceptable situations.
Print
Go Up Pages1 2 3 4 ... 7
User actions