okCupid

[Cardinal Pizza Deliverance.]

I don't know, it was mystifying. He didn't ask any questions or say anything about being interested in meeting me, so I just didn't reply.

Weird, man.

[Freeky]

I think he was probably giving you things to ask him about and be interested in, so he wouldn't have to let you be the dominant one in the conversation.  Or something. 

What the hell is it even with people being all "I'M AM DOMENINT."?  Is this supposed to be a way to make yourself seem more attractive and likeable?  And is it just the ones I've met, or does it seem like every single person, on and off the interbutts, who goes around telling people they're dominant are almost universally assholes?  Controlling assholes?

[Cardinal Pizza Deliverance.]

I think he was probably giving you things to ask him about and be interested in, so he wouldn't have to let you be the dominant one in the conversation.  Or something. 

What the hell is it even with people being all "I'M AM DOMENINT."?  Is this supposed to be a way to make yourself seem more attractive and likeable?  And is it just the ones I've met, or does it seem like every single person, on and off the interbutts, who goes around telling people they're dominant are almost universally assholes?  Controlling assholes?

Yeah. Although what 'dominant' means apparently changes from douchebag to douchebag. It can be anything from "I AM A BDSM GURU!!!" to "I CUT FIREWOOD WITH MY PENIS" to "I WILL ORDER YOUR FOOD BECAUSE YOU ARE SUBMISSIVE AND THUS WILL EAT WHAT I PICK OR STARVE". People are weird, yo.

[Left]

I found girlfriendo through POF.

...I found an orgy  through OkC.

*Shrug*  Your mileage may vary.

Thread is now about Hylierandom. Sorry CPD.

What the hell is it even with people being all "I'M AM DOMENINT."?  Is this supposed to be a way to make yourself seem more attractive and likeable?  And is it just the ones I've met, or does it seem like every single person, on and off the interbutts, who goes around telling people they're dominant are almost universally assholes?  Controlling assholes?

Okay...BDSM thing... there are FAR more subs than Doms.
...There are (as far as I can tell) far more wannabe Doms/Dommes than good ones.
So a good Dom/Domme is in demand.

This is because good Dominants have to work at it.  It takes some intelligence.  It also takes training if bondage is involved-it's actually really easy to seriously hurt someone if you do not know what you are doing.

...Put that under the heading: "Never do anything you'd be embarrassed to tell the paramedics about."

I was told the Dominant's job, in part, was to order the sub to do what they wanted to do anyway.

Do keep in mind, I'm a n00b to BDSM, and now working weekends when all the parties go down. 

When I first "separated" with the ex, I kinda was like "YAY! I can have sex now!"  so I went a little nuts...
I did have one guy I met through POF...seemed very nice from the profile.

THEN I got him on the phone, and within five minutes he basically started getting so perverse that I almost swabbed my ear with hand sanitizer after the call.

After that they didn't get my cellphone # until we'd actually met somewhere in public.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

I think he was probably giving you things to ask him about and be interested in, so he wouldn't have to let you be the dominant one in the conversation.  Or something. 

What the hell is it even with people being all "I'M AM DOMENINT."?  Is this supposed to be a way to make yourself seem more attractive and likeable?  And is it just the ones I've met, or does it seem like every single person, on and off the interbutts, who goes around telling people they're dominant are almost universally assholes?  Controlling assholes?

Yeah. Although what 'dominant' means apparently changes from douchebag to douchebag. It can be anything from "I AM A BDSM GURU!!!" to "I CUT FIREWOOD WITH MY PENIS" to "I WILL ORDER YOUR FOOD BECAUSE YOU ARE SUBMISSIVE AND THUS WILL EAT WHAT I PICK OR STARVE". People are weird, yo.

I dunno, but since that's super not my scene it's a good signal for me to not bother with them. Anyone who throws that out there as a part of their core identity is not someone I'm compatible with, and I don't really want to hear about it so I don't talk to them.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

That and the "I'm in a poly relationship" guys.

No, you're not, you're in an open relationship and you're looking  to get laid, and if I go out with you you will subject me to hour upon hour of you explaining how you're just so secure in your relationship that you decided to open it up, followed by hour upon hour of you explaining how  you're totally OK with how into her lover your wife is, followed by hour upon hour of you talking about your impending divorce.

Been around the block a few times, it's totally fucking predictable.

Throw in some ecstatic dance and the people you met through a sex-positive Meetup group, too, because it's Portland.

[Salty]

That and the "I'm in a poly relationship" guys.

No, you're not, you're in an open relationship and you're looking  to get laid, and if I go out with you you will subject me to hour upon hour of you explaining how you're just so secure in your relationship that you decided to open it up, followed by hour upon hour of you explaining how  you're totally OK with how into her lover your wife is, followed by hour upon hour of you talking about your impending divorce.

Been around the block a few times, it's totally fucking predictable.

Throw in some ecstatic dance and the people you met through a sex-positive Meetup group, too, because it's Portland.

There's few things as frustrating than people who assert some of their actions as a core component of their identity. Whether you're a poly/dom/relationship queer* or a stoner or an MBA or what have you, you don't need to wear a giant t-shirt that says so, it doesn't need to make up the whole of your conversation at every conceivable moment.

I mean, sure, do that shit. It's your life. Do your thing, just keep it away from me.

BUT, I would strongly urge people that want to be bipedal to avoid making their SOME of their actions the ENTIRETY of their identity. That's just foolish.




*

[Q. G. Pennyworth]

Wouldn't bringing up the poly/dom/trans* stuff be super relevant to put up front on a dating site? I'm all for those thigs not being the core of your identity and all, but it seems pretty important to get out there with people you might want to bang.

[The Johnny]

Wouldn't bringing up the poly/dom/trans* stuff be super relevant to put up front on a dating site? I'm all for those thigs not being the core of your identity and all, but it seems pretty important to get out there with people you might want to bang.

Depends what you are looking for, i would say.

The things you mention are the things that matter the most to you, so if your rap is mostly revolving around domination and how sensual you are, then one can obviously infer you are only looking for sex.

[Cardinal Pizza Deliverance.]

Wouldn't bringing up the poly/dom/trans* stuff be super relevant to put up front on a dating site? I'm all for those thigs not being the core of your identity and all, but it seems pretty important to get out there with people you might want to bang.

Bring it up? Sure. Have a discussion about it even? Absolutely. Make it the entire focus of a date with several hours of lecturing solely on THAT ONE THING, to the exclusion of any other discussion and/or learning about the other person you're meeting with? No.

[Salty]

Wouldn't bringing up the poly/dom/trans* stuff be super relevant to put up front on a dating site? I'm all for those thigs not being the core of your identity and all, but it seems pretty important to get out there with people you might want to bang.

I dunno, I have an open thingy and I just mention it and go to lengths to makes people aware of how awfully abrasive my personality is. Okcupid has never really worked for me.

[Left]

Wouldn't bringing up the poly/dom/trans* stuff be super relevant to put up front on a dating site? I'm all for those thigs not being the core of your identity and all, but it seems pretty important to get out there with people you might want to bang.

I dunno, I have an open thingy and I just mention it and go to lengths to makes people aware of how awfully abrasive my personality is. Okcupid has never really worked for me.

Funny, you don't come off as exceptionally abrasive on the internet.

...I find it takes out wrinkles and gray hairs too.

...I figured out that if I am dating more than one person, I have no time for anything else. 
I have the option, but I'm not really interested in exercising it at this point.
Girlfriendo's good for me and actually wants more sex than I do...and after the Mr Floppy incident...  
Plus the couple I tried to form a triad with?  I think they just wanted me to spend money on them.
 
I don't have much money to be used for, yanno?

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

That and the "I'm in a poly relationship" guys.

No, you're not, you're in an open relationship and you're looking  to get laid, and if I go out with you you will subject me to hour upon hour of you explaining how you're just so secure in your relationship that you decided to open it up, followed by hour upon hour of you explaining how  you're totally OK with how into her lover your wife is, followed by hour upon hour of you talking about your impending divorce.

Been around the block a few times, it's totally fucking predictable.

Throw in some ecstatic dance and the people you met through a sex-positive Meetup group, too, because it's Portland.

There's few things as frustrating than people who assert some of their actions as a core component of their identity. Whether you're a poly/dom/relationship queer* or a stoner or an MBA or what have you, you don't need to wear a giant t-shirt that says so, it doesn't need to make up the whole of your conversation at every conceivable moment.

I mean, sure, do that shit. It's your life. Do your thing, just keep it away from me.

BUT, I would strongly urge people that want to be bipedal to avoid making their SOME of their actions the ENTIRETY of their identity. That's just foolish.




*

SERIOUSLY.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Alty is like a paragon of sweetness and sunshine.

[Cardinal Pizza Deliverance.]

Alty is like a paragon of sweetness and sunshine.

I feel like there should be more to that statement. "A paragon of sweetness and sunshine . . . ENCASED IN AN ADAMANTIUM MECHA DROID HELL BENT ON DESTROYING ALL THAT LIVES, STARTING WITH PALIN AND PUTIN!!!!1!!!"