Why you think the world is shittier than it really is.

[AFK]

Read a book.  Interact with other real humans in your domicile.  Take up stamp collecting.

Your bucket list? I mean, you're doing the same thing we are.

That's different.  For reasons that do not concern you or I.   

The worst thing about severe alcohol abuse is that it might not kill you.

It might turn you into RWHN.

RWHN doing substance abuse prevention in his spare time, ironically.

You can believe that, if you so choose.  I think he's been out of work for a while.  Just a guess, mind you.

Ha ha.  Nope.  Your federal tax dollars are still paying me a salary.

Well, here's the thing.  You're a boozer, and boozers ALWAYS lie.

So I don't believe you.

So?

So, while you're still getting a government cheque, I'm assuming it's unemployment.

Sure, okay, if that brings joy to your life.  Appropriate post given the thread subject. 

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Read a book.  Interact with other real humans in your domicile.  Take up stamp collecting.

Your bucket list? I mean, you're doing the same thing we are.

That's different.  For reasons that do not concern you or I.   

The worst thing about severe alcohol abuse is that it might not kill you.

It might turn you into RWHN.

RWHN doing substance abuse prevention in his spare time, ironically.

You can believe that, if you so choose.  I think he's been out of work for a while.  Just a guess, mind you.

Ha ha.  Nope.  Your federal tax dollars are still paying me a salary.

Well, here's the thing.  You're a boozer, and boozers ALWAYS lie.

So I don't believe you.

So?

So, while you're still getting a government cheque, I'm assuming it's unemployment.

Sure, okay, if that brings joy to your life.  Appropriate post given the thread subject. 

Naw.  What brings joy to my life is your wet-brained insistence that we're all doom freaks because we look at the bad along with the good...And your crowing of superiority over the issue.

You hilarious fucking drunkard.

[AFK]

Anyway, a better use of this thread is to get back to the original spirit of the thread.  So I will instead be posting content from the Good Vibes Generator, starting with this one:

A 10-year-old English boy successfully performed the Heimlich maneuver on a choking classmate. He learned the lifesaving move from a background joke poster in the Season 3 Simpsons episode "Homer at the Bat." Read More

Read more: http://www.cracked.com/photoplasty/#ixzz2cWjs5Pd5

[AFK]

On Christmas Eve during World War II, a German woman and her 12-year-old son sheltered a group of wounded American soldiers. Soon after, a group of lost and hungry Nazis also knocked on her door. The woman took everyone's weapons and sat them all down to share a holiday meal. Read More

Read more: http://www.cracked.com/photoplasty/#ixzz2cWk9ODnO

[AFK]

When John Resig, co-owner of TheCHIVE.com, asked readers to help raise $30,000 so an Iraq War vet and quadruple amputee could build his dream log cabin in the woods, they instead raised $250,000, which funded that cabin and helped him meet the president and get fitted with prosthetic limbs.

[Nephew Twiddleton]

Read a book.  Interact with other real humans in your domicile.  Take up stamp collecting.

Your bucket list? I mean, you're doing the same thing we are.

That's different.  For reasons that do not concern you or I.   

The worst thing about severe alcohol abuse is that it might not kill you.

It might turn you into RWHN.

RWHN doing substance abuse prevention in his spare time, ironically.

You can believe that, if you so choose.  I think he's been out of work for a while.  Just a guess, mind you.

Well, I dunno. He was shopping for a ring for his girlfriend today.

A move I was considering suggesting to him to maybe wait on for a little bit since his divorce is still recent history until he called me assface (open hostility=/=hatred).

He is a human being after all and I don't want him to get too entangled too quickly if he might not be thinking through the neurochemical rush that is new love.

I'm 38 years old.  She is 39.  We didn't just fall off the turnip truck.

Still seems a bit quick. Just saying.

[trippinprincezz13]

Finally, we've found a reputable source that RWHN can agree on!

http://www.cracked.com/article_18595_6-slacker-behaviors-that-science-says-are-good-you.html "Smoking Weed May Fight Alzheimer's and Cancer"

http://www.cracked.com/funny-6678-why-cannibis-nessesary....for-everyone/  "The best evidence of how long we have been using cannibis though is contained within our own brains. We have Canniboid receptors in our brains. Not receptors for pears, or or flax, or chickpeas. We have used this plant so long we have a special structure in our brain cells just to interact with it."

http://www.cracked.com/article_19372_5-ways-your-bad-habits-might-just-save-your-life_p2.html "Marijuana Helps People With Alzheimer's" "LSD and Psilocybin Mushrooms Cure Headaches and Fear of Death Itself "

Drug Threads Over! Thanks Cracked!

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

My ex did something really similar; got engaged not long after the divorce, just a few months after starting to date someone. It didn't work out and it put a ton of stress on the kids, which of course he refused to see.

The parenting class Oregon makes you take when you get a divorce here tells you specifically not to do that and to just give it a couple of years before bringing home a replacement spouse, for the sake of the kids, but of course he thought he was special.

[AFK]

Finally, we've found a reputable source that RWHN can agree on!

http://www.cracked.com/article_18595_6-slacker-behaviors-that-science-says-are-good-you.html "Smoking Weed May Fight Alzheimer's and Cancer"

http://www.cracked.com/funny-6678-why-cannibis-nessesary....for-everyone/  "The best evidence of how long we have been using cannibis though is contained within our own brains. We have Canniboid receptors in our brains. Not receptors for pears, or or flax, or chickpeas. We have used this plant so long we have a special structure in our brain cells just to interact with it."

http://www.cracked.com/article_19372_5-ways-your-bad-habits-might-just-save-your-life_p2.html "Marijuana Helps People With Alzheimer's" "LSD and Psilocybin Mushrooms Cure Headaches and Fear of Death Itself "

Drug Threads Over! Thanks Cracked!

http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-pro-marijuana-arguments-that-arent-helping/

[AFK]

"If the argument is that pot is the safer choice, then by that rationale, it's also safer than deep-throating a cactus or mouth-fucking a rattlesnake. Is someone obligating you to choose between the two? There's not a third option of just not doing either of them? That has baffled me for years, and I still don't understand it. But I've heard it. A lot. As if the legalization of one unhealthy activity obligates us to legalize every single thing that's less lethal than that."

Read more: http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-pro-marijuana-arguments-that-arent-helping_p2/#ixzz2cWsUJsaX

Yes, thank you Cracked!

[AFK]

Read a book.  Interact with other real humans in your domicile.  Take up stamp collecting.

Your bucket list? I mean, you're doing the same thing we are.

That's different.  For reasons that do not concern you or I.   

The worst thing about severe alcohol abuse is that it might not kill you.

It might turn you into RWHN.

RWHN doing substance abuse prevention in his spare time, ironically.

You can believe that, if you so choose.  I think he's been out of work for a while.  Just a guess, mind you.

Well, I dunno. He was shopping for a ring for his girlfriend today.

A move I was considering suggesting to him to maybe wait on for a little bit since his divorce is still recent history until he called me assface (open hostility=/=hatred).

He is a human being after all and I don't want him to get too entangled too quickly if he might not be thinking through the neurochemical rush that is new love.

I'm 38 years old.  She is 39.  We didn't just fall off the turnip truck.

Still seems a bit quick. Just saying.

Seeing how the actual wedding will be, at the earliest, next summer, it's really not that quick at all.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Anyway, a better use of this thread is to get back to the original spirit of the thread.

I disagree.

A better use of this thread is speculating on which came first, your booze problem or your wife leaving you.

[AFK]

Baltimore businessman Lenny B. Robinson spends $25,000 a year on a Batman costume, gear, and a black Lamborghini decked out with bat symbols. Why? Because it lets him entertain sick kids in the coolest way ever.

[Nephew Twiddleton]

My ex did something really similar; got engaged not long after the divorce, just a few months after starting to date someone. It didn't work out and it put a ton of stress on the kids, which of course he refused to see.

The parenting class Oregon makes you take when you get a divorce here tells you specifically not to do that and to just give it a couple of years before bringing home a replacement spouse, for the sake of the kids, but of course he thought he was special.

That's probably why 2nd, 3rd, and 4th marriages have a progressively higher divorce rate.

Which of course is what's screwing up the stats to say 50% of all marriages end in divorce.

[trippinprincezz13]

"If the argument is that pot is the safer choice, then by that rationale, it's also safer than deep-throating a cactus or mouth-fucking a rattlesnake. Is someone obligating you to choose between the two? There's not a third option of just not doing either of them? That has baffled me for years, and I still don't understand it. But I've heard it. A lot. As if the legalization of one unhealthy activity obligates us to legalize every single thing that's less lethal than that."

Read more: http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-pro-marijuana-arguments-that-arent-helping_p2/#ixzz2cWsUJsaX

Yes, thank you Cracked!

Cracked.com is SRS BZNS  ITT