ITT: SUU WILL FIX YOUR HISTORY

[Suu]

ASK A QUESTION ABOUT A HISTORICAL EVENT FOR IT TO BE MADE ACCURATE BY A GODDAMN INDUSTRY PROFESSIONAL.

GO!

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Albert Einstien:  Boffed Marilyn Monroe or not?

[Suu]

Albert Einstien:  Boffed Marilyn Monroe or not?

You bet your fucking ass he did. Twice.

The first time was in Berlin in 1933. After that, they both emigrated to the United States to run from Hitler and his army of MechaHitlers to the promised land of dirty old men boinking young women. Then she ran off with that cocksucker Joe DiMaggio. The end.


/
Marilyn, Aufwiedersehen!

[Cramulus]

What was Alan Turing's favorite position?

[Suu]

What was Alan Turing's favorite position?

Reverse Cowgirl.

[Q. G. Pennyworth]

Who was the first man to jerk off on the moon?

[Cramulus]

Who was the first man to jerk off to the moon?

[EK WAFFLR]

Who was the first man/woman to jerk off the moon?


Also, Marie Curie. Genius? Party girl? Both?

[Cramulus]

What are some examples of kinky fun time in different historical cultures? I mean, I hear that flogging has pretty much always been popular. What are some kinks that we'd find really bizarre?

[Suu]

Who was the first man to jerk off on the moon?

You would think it was Buzz Aldrin, but in actuality, it was a monkey named Zimbo that was rocked up there in 1939 by the Nazis. Ever see "Iron Sky"? That moon base is the real deal, they colonized the moon with apes first to ensure that humans could handle it. That and Lithuanians.

[Suu]

Who was the first man to jerk off to the moon?

Queen Hatshepsut. Remember that beard on all of her statues? Yeahhhhh...

[Suu]

Who was the first man/woman to jerk off the moon?

Roger Waters.

Also, Marie Curie. Genius? Party girl? Both?

Marie Curie was a member of the Chi Upsilon Nu Tau sorority at the University of Indiana at Perdue in 1989. She was notorious for entering wet t-shirt contests on Sink or Swim Tuesdays, and was known for that thing she did with her tongue, so says the Brother Fraternity members from Eta Epsilon Alpha Delta.

[Q. G. Pennyworth]

Which medieval ruler was the biggest dick?

[Suu]

What are some examples of kinky fun time in different historical cultures? I mean, I hear that flogging has pretty much always been popular. What are some kinks that we'd find really bizarre?

Some cultures enjoyed piercing their genitalia with stingray spines. I'm not making that shit up.

[Suu]

Which medieval ruler was the biggest dick?

Pope Boniface VIII.

I could name a bazillion medieval assholes, but that guy...THAT FUCKING GUY. Nepotism like whoa, and would excommunicate anyone who looked at him funny in attempt to be Pope-Emperor. This failed, and he died after getting beaten half to death by the King of France's cronies, and the result was the Avignon Papacy. That's actually true also. Sometimes, the truth is funnier than fiction.