The Kitchen Chronicles

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Simple things for Roger to boost cooking morale:

Fluffy Eggs:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TGyb7uBXe9E

Chinese American:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v_dkYNq8G9Y

Mc' Chicken Homemade. This guy teaches you how to make fast food stuff at home. I tend to experiment with the recipes etc..
Like no MSG,Asparteme, no HFC etc..

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bbUcq5fWgJc

I'll be happy when I can make the eggs stop ablating in the pan.

I don't even know what to say to that.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Simple things for Roger to boost cooking morale:

Fluffy Eggs:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TGyb7uBXe9E

Chinese American:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v_dkYNq8G9Y

Mc' Chicken Homemade. This guy teaches you how to make fast food stuff at home. I tend to experiment with the recipes etc..
Like no MSG,Asparteme, no HFC etc..

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bbUcq5fWgJc

I'll be happy when I can make the eggs stop ablating in the pan.

I don't even know what to say to that.

When you try to scramble a hard boiled egg, it heats at different rates.  The white tries to get away from yolk, because it HATES yolk.  It then sticks to the ceiling like Goddamn Spiderman.

[Ben Shapiro]

Simple things for Roger to boost cooking morale:

Fluffy Eggs:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TGyb7uBXe9E

Chinese American:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v_dkYNq8G9Y

Mc' Chicken Homemade. This guy teaches you how to make fast food stuff at home. I tend to experiment with the recipes etc..
Like no MSG,Asparteme, no HFC etc..

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bbUcq5fWgJc

I'll be happy when I can make the eggs stop ablating in the pan.

When I learned to make eggs with this video. I decided  to hold the pan away from the heat while he "scrambles" them. So you don't get a lot of egg still stuck on pan. It's all about heat control the pan is still hot and it still cooks the eggs even away from the heat.

So far I'm working on making simple noodle soups for the Binks,Jorge, and the wife. If Binks loves it then I consider it a victory.
We don't have a oven here so we use a conventional oven. I improvise a lot when I cook.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Simple things for Roger to boost cooking morale:

Fluffy Eggs:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TGyb7uBXe9E

Chinese American:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v_dkYNq8G9Y

Mc' Chicken Homemade. This guy teaches you how to make fast food stuff at home. I tend to experiment with the recipes etc..
Like no MSG,Asparteme, no HFC etc..

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bbUcq5fWgJc

I'll be happy when I can make the eggs stop ablating in the pan.

When I learned to make eggs with this video. I decided  to hold the pan away from the heat while he "scrambles" them. So you don't get a lot of egg still stuck on pan. It's all about heat control the pan is still hot and it still cooks the eggs even away from the heat.

So far I'm working on making simple noodle soups for the Binks,Jorge, and the wife. If Binks loves it then I consider it a victory.
We don't have a oven here so we use a conventional oven. I improvise a lot when I cook.

I shall give it a try, sir.

[Ben Shapiro]

Simple things for Roger to boost cooking morale:

Fluffy Eggs:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TGyb7uBXe9E

Chinese American:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v_dkYNq8G9Y

Mc' Chicken Homemade. This guy teaches you how to make fast food stuff at home. I tend to experiment with the recipes etc..
Like no MSG,Asparteme, no HFC etc..

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bbUcq5fWgJc

I'll be happy when I can make the eggs stop ablating in the pan.

When I learned to make eggs with this video. I decided  to hold the pan away from the heat while he "scrambles" them. So you don't get a lot of egg still stuck on pan. It's all about heat control the pan is still hot and it still cooks the eggs even away from the heat.

So far I'm working on making simple noodle soups for the Binks,Jorge, and the wife. If Binks loves it then I consider it a victory.
We don't have a oven here so we use a conventional oven. I improvise a lot when I cook.

I shall give it a try, sir.

When you succeed I expect pics of your face in the plate. Victory is god damn delicious.

[Pope Pixie Pickle]

Have You People ever heard of "timers"?

Yes. I recently got one. It is weird though, you are supposed to put it in the water and the color changes depending on time spent at boiling temperature. So it give you a clear signal when to take the eggs out if you want them either soft/hard boiled/green/exploding. I don't really understand how that would help me since i tend to be in a different part of the house by then.

STAY IN THE KITCHEN. If you are bored clean something. keep an eye on your food damnit.

[Q. G. Pennyworth]

Pancakes are NOT EASY FOOD. Try punch chicken instead.

[Pope Pixie Pickle]

and do you food burning people not have phones with timers on them? I don't have a kitchen timer but I do use my phone.

Never leave pasta, rice, potatoes, or anything that is being boiled or grilled/broiled unattended. DO NEVAR.  Same goes for your grilled cheese or toasted sammich.

if you want to leave shit unattended, use a timer and roast stuff, Like meat, and vegetables.

I like risottos. They need constant attention, stirring and I can't let myself get distracted if it's going to work.

Pancakes are NOT EASY FOOD. Try punch chicken instead.

I can imagine the thicker American style pancakes being a compete arseache. British ones (thicker than crepes but you can still roll em) are one of the first things I learned to cook. Before that it was stir frying vegetables stood on a stool at 6 with parental supervision.

[Pope Pixie Pickle]

ROGER I THINK YOU SHOULD MAKE POACHED EGGS!   

[Kai]

and do you food burning people not have phones with timers on them? I don't have a kitchen timer but I do use my phone.

Never leave pasta, rice, potatoes, or anything that is being boiled or grilled/broiled unattended. DO NEVAR.  Same goes for your grilled cheese or toasted sammich.

if you want to leave shit unattended, use a timer and roast stuff, Like meat, and vegetables.

Seriously. Out of every mistake from people who claim to not be able to cook, burning something because they fail the simple task of /keeping an eye on their food/ is the number one reason. It's not goddamn rocket science. It's not even /biology/. It's kindergarten skills.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

OK, if you people are really simply wandering away while you cook, I have a better grasp on why your cookery is not working out so well.  Don't do that.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

OK, if you people are really simply wandering away while you cook, I have a better grasp on why your cookery is not working out so well.  Don't do that.

I didn't do that.  I never even hinted that I do that.  Someone else said that shit, and now I am somehow guilty of food neglect.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

OK, if you people are really simply wandering away while you cook, I have a better grasp on why your cookery is not working out so well.  Don't do that.

I didn't do that.  I never even hinted that I do that.  Someone else said that shit, and now I am somehow guilty of food neglect.

OK. I absolve you of suspicion of food neglect. However, my advice to use a timer stands!

[Pope Pixie Pickle]

and do you food burning people not have phones with timers on them? I don't have a kitchen timer but I do use my phone.

Never leave pasta, rice, potatoes, or anything that is being boiled or grilled/broiled unattended. DO NEVAR.  Same goes for your grilled cheese or toasted sammich.

if you want to leave shit unattended, use a timer and roast stuff, Like meat, and vegetables.

Seriously. Out of every mistake from people who claim to not be able to cook, burning something because they fail the simple task of /keeping an eye on their food/ is the number one reason. It's not goddamn rocket science. It's not even /biology/. It's kindergarten skills.

oh and frying pans. DO NEVAR LEAVE SOMETHING WITH HOT OIL IN UNATTENDED.


It seems Rog is not leaving things unattended, and it is the finer details rather than uber-rookie fuckups.

For Regret though. this advice stands.

[Pope Pixie Pickle]

Roger, are you trying to SCIENCE your food too hard with excessive heat?