The First Church of the Wrath of Baby Jesus and Open Bar™

[Q. G. Pennyworth]

Never too old to look 

[Nephew Twiddleton]

Never too old to look 

Eh, true but it I feel creepy for them if they were born after the collapse of the Soviet Union.

[Nephew Twiddleton]

Oh, other highlight:
-Finding tub of hummus in the conference room fridge with the words "You can use it" written on it.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

So, I've decided to raise my rates, substantially.

This means I have to vacuum the floor and make, blech, pretty.

I've always left a thin layer of dust, oil, and passive indignation in my office that serves to seperate the wheat from the obnoxious wheat.  Vacuuming is like a slow, not torture exactly...

We ought to just grow grass indoors. Lawns become gardens, carpets become lawns.

It's just natural, man.
         /

Make it beautiful, make it expensive, and you will also attract fewer pain-in-the-ass clients! It will be awesome!

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Oh, other highlight:
-Finding tub of hummus in the conference room fridge with the words "You can use it" written on it.

I don't know why this made me laugh, but it did.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Another kid dropped chemistry today.

At the end of the class, the instructor started being really nice. I get the impression that he freaked out enough people into dropping, now he's happy, and can start treating the rest of us like his Chosen Ones.

I seriously hate that dynamic.

[Nephew Twiddleton]

Oh, other highlight:
-Finding tub of hummus in the conference room fridge with the words "You can use it" written on it.

I don't know why this made me laugh, but it did.

It made me laugh, too. I think that it's non-obvious awkward use of English. It's correct, but that's not what someone would write, normally, which would be "free to use" or "up for grabs." It's less awkward than "make sex" but just as funny.

ETA: I also had my own near moldy bread on my desk, so I definitely can use it.

[Salty]

On my first day of middle school, for which I was not prepared in any way whatsoever, PE was the first class of the day.

I cant remember what we were doing, but we were standing well apart from one another, but there was this girl behind me. The second i saw her I realized she was the most beautiful thinf I had seen in my life up to that point.

She said, "What are you looking at?" In a way that conveyed the thought "You are a disgusting little toad and your eyeballs make me want to puke."

This etched itself into my brain something FIERCE.

Anyhow, I saw her today, she's a teller at my bank.

"Did you go to Mears middle school?" I say.
"Yeah," she said.
"I remember you. We had gym together."
"You say that like I was mean to you."
"You were, but it's okay. Kids are mean. It's not easy for girls in our culture, there's no support. It's easy to use hostility as a defense."
"I'm sorry" she said.

It's been a weird week.

[Suu]

On my first day of middle school, for which I was not prepared in any way whatsoever, PE was the first class of the day.

I cant remember what we were doing, but we were standing well apart from one another, but there was this girl behind me. The second i saw her I realized she was the most beautiful thinf I had seen in my life up to that point.

She said, "What are you looking at?" In a way that conveyed the thought "You are a disgusting little toad and your eyeballs make me want to puke."

This etched itself into my brain something FIERCE.

Anyhow, I saw her today, she's a teller at my bank.

"Did you go to Mears middle school?" I say.
"Yeah," she said.
"I remember you. We had gym together."
"You say that like I was mean to you."
"You were, but it's okay. Kids are mean. It's not easy for girls in our culture, there's no support. It's easy to use hostility as a defense."
"I'm sorry" she said.

It's been a weird week.

You probably made her feel really weird.

[Salty]

On my first day of middle school, for which I was not prepared in any way whatsoever, PE was the first class of the day.

I cant remember what we were doing, but we were standing well apart from one another, but there was this girl behind me. The second i saw her I realized she was the most beautiful thinf I had seen in my life up to that point.

She said, "What are you looking at?" In a way that conveyed the thought "You are a disgusting little toad and your eyeballs make me want to puke."

This etched itself into my brain something FIERCE.

Anyhow, I saw her today, she's a teller at my bank.

"Did you go to Mears middle school?" I say.
"Yeah," she said.
"I remember you. We had gym together."
"You say that like I was mean to you."
"You were, but it's okay. Kids are mean. It's not easy for girls in our culture, there's no support. It's easy to use hostility as a defense."
"I'm sorry" she said.

It's been a weird week.

You probably made her feel really weird.

Thank fuck.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

On my first day of middle school, for which I was not prepared in any way whatsoever, PE was the first class of the day.

I cant remember what we were doing, but we were standing well apart from one another, but there was this girl behind me. The second i saw her I realized she was the most beautiful thinf I had seen in my life up to that point.

She said, "What are you looking at?" In a way that conveyed the thought "You are a disgusting little toad and your eyeballs make me want to puke."

This etched itself into my brain something FIERCE.

Anyhow, I saw her today, she's a teller at my bank.

"Did you go to Mears middle school?" I say.
"Yeah," she said.
"I remember you. We had gym together."
"You say that like I was mean to you."
"You were, but it's okay. Kids are mean. It's not easy for girls in our culture, there's no support. It's easy to use hostility as a defense."
"I'm sorry" she said.

It's been a weird week.

Very weird!

[Salty]

I also said, "it's okay, I'm pretty mean now."

She said, "Oh I was mean to you then and made you mean now."

I said, "it's all right."

I didn't say, "You were one of many that contributed to the horror show of spite, aggression, bitterness, and subtle cruelty that is now my terrible.personality as seen by the average jerkoff."

Because i have tact and shit.

[Q. G. Pennyworth]

I also said, "it's okay, I'm pretty mean now."

She said, "Oh I was mean to you then and made you mean now."

I said, "it's all right."

I didn't say, "You were one of many that contributed to the horror show of spite, aggression, bitterness, and subtle cruelty that is now my terrible.personality as seen by the average jerkoff."

Because i have tact and shit.

Alty, I have a hug here for you.

It's in Boston, but... you know.

[Nephew Twiddleton]

I also said, "it's okay, I'm pretty mean now."

She said, "Oh I was mean to you then and made you mean now."

I said, "it's all right."

I didn't say, "You were one of many that contributed to the horror show of spite, aggression, bitterness, and subtle cruelty that is now my terrible.personality as seen by the average jerkoff."

Because i have tact and shit.

"You were one of the many who taught me that hostility is an easy way of defense" might have put some perspective into it.

I applaud you for your tact.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Got some good sleep last night, but I'm still paying for the rest of the week.

SO TIRED.