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OPEN BAR: it rubs the lotion on the skin or it gets the hose again

Started by Salty, February 02, 2014, 03:49:04 AM

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Salty

 :lulz:

Shit, i needed that. I feel awful. I got some in my own face, a tiny bit in my bad eye, but she got it square in the middle.
The world is a car and you're the crash test dummy.

Eater of Clowns

Quote from: Alty on February 05, 2014, 07:52:41 PM
As I sat down at the back of a bus, I unshouldered by bag and sat down, the bag caught the release on my bear mace. I started shouting GO GO GO, and some poor woman caught a bunch in the face.  :sad:

Eveyone got off, and I got a lot of nasty looks as I apologized. Called a cab and took the lady to.the ER. The only reason I wont pay for it is she is Native Alaskan and it's free.

:horrormirth:

Quote from: Cain on February 05, 2014, 07:55:10 PM
You can mace Alaskan Natives at no charge whatsoever?  Truly, America is the land of the free.

:lulz:
Quote from: Pippa Twiddleton on December 22, 2012, 01:06:36 AM
EoC, you are the bane of my existence.

Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on March 07, 2014, 01:18:23 AM
EoC doesn't make creepy.

EoC makes creepy worse.

Quote
the afflicted persons get hold of and consume carrots even in socially quite unacceptable situations.

Salty

I am just leaving that shit home from now on.

Im lucky it didnt happen with my son. And that it only got one person. And that she was god natured about the whole thing.
The world is a car and you're the crash test dummy.

Eater of Clowns

Quote from: Alty on February 05, 2014, 08:17:40 PM
I am just leaving that shit home from now on.

Im lucky it didnt happen with my son. And that it only got one person. And that she was god natured about the whole thing.

Nonsense, Alty, you're doing the work you were born to do.

Goddamn bears think they can parade around in the skins of Alaskan Native ladies, or hide under bus seats preparing to strike and there YOU are, with your bear mace, screeching and spraying a hellish arc of pepper at them for their presumptions. Alaska needs you, Alty. It needs you and your bear mace.

You're like the motherfucking bear mace Punisher.
Quote from: Pippa Twiddleton on December 22, 2012, 01:06:36 AM
EoC, you are the bane of my existence.

Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on March 07, 2014, 01:18:23 AM
EoC doesn't make creepy.

EoC makes creepy worse.

Quote
the afflicted persons get hold of and consume carrots even in socially quite unacceptable situations.

Eater of Clowns

Quite frankly, I'm confused and relieved that I myself wasn't bear maced at our meeting. Those in your presence not being bear maced at any given point in time is an anomaly. While near you, bear maced is the natural order of a person's existence.
Quote from: Pippa Twiddleton on December 22, 2012, 01:06:36 AM
EoC, you are the bane of my existence.

Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on March 07, 2014, 01:18:23 AM
EoC doesn't make creepy.

EoC makes creepy worse.

Quote
the afflicted persons get hold of and consume carrots even in socially quite unacceptable situations.

Suu

My parents' kitten officially has no balls. He came home and asked for my brother to catch him a lizard. (Florida cats, it's a thing.) So, so much for him being calm for a few days. He does keep checking for his missing parts, but that's about it.

So. Mom went to Michael's as planned and got two black puffballs and sewed them together. Then my brother decided he also needed a part in this, and used some of his fly tying materials to add an extra tuft of fur. They're at the neighbors house now to see if they have a small mason jar. My sister will be over for dinner. This is going to be a thing of LEGEND.   :lulz:

(For those that missed the previous post: In summary, my sister was obsessed with the kitten's fuzzy nutsack, so my mom is giving it to her as a present. :) )
Sovereign Episkopos-Princess Kaousuu; Esq., Battle Nun, Bene Gesserit.
Our Lady of Perpetual Confusion; 1st Church of Discordia

"Add a dab of lavender to milk, leave town with an orange, and pretend you're laughing at it."

Cainad (dec.)

Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on February 05, 2014, 01:36:24 PM
So, yeah, I got shingles.  In my left eye.  Who the fuck gets shingles in their EYE?  It's the one place this shit can do real damage.

In any case, I'm on a stack of antvirals, and they're about 95% sure I'll keep my vision in that eye.

YEOWCH. Murphy and Finagle are on a fucking blitz.

EK WAFFLR

"At first I lifted weights.  But then I asked myself, 'why not people?'  Now everyone runs for the fjord when they see me."


Horribly Oscillating Assbasket of Deliciousness
[/b]

EK WAFFLR

ALso, had to google shingles. Fuckin' 'ell, DOUR. Be a 95%er.
"At first I lifted weights.  But then I asked myself, 'why not people?'  Now everyone runs for the fjord when they see me."


Horribly Oscillating Assbasket of Deliciousness
[/b]

Salty

Quote from: Waffleman on February 06, 2014, 01:20:17 AM
I have become boring. :(

That's excellent!
I have feared becoming so, or feeling bored for a long time. It hasn't really happened to me much until recently. Now the sheer pain of it forces me to find new and different ways to do things, things I was previously afraid to do.

Boredom rocks.
The world is a car and you're the crash test dummy.

Ben Shapiro

You think mace is going to stop me? HHAHAHAAAHHAAHAHAAHAH!!!!!! When was the last time someone saw a dead bear on the road due to mace? NEVER!

You puny humans will suffer for oppressing my white, snow bretheren up North. The Revolution is now!

Fredfredly ⊂(◉‿◉)つ

One of my tires got shredded up by ice shards while trying to escape my snow/ice parking lot  :mad:

Telarus

Telarus, KSC,
.__.  Keeper of the Contradictory Cephalopod, Zenarchist Swordsman,
(0o)  Tender to the Edible Zen Garden, Ratcheting Metallic Sex Doll of The End Times,
/||\   Episkopos of the Amorphous Dreams Cabal

Join the Doll Underground! Experience the Phantasmagorical Safari!

Nephew Twiddleton

Quote from: Waffleman on February 06, 2014, 01:20:17 AM
I have become boring. :(

I feel pretty boring myself. It's probably a bit of restlessness though, for both of us. It's winter. We had moderate snow, moderate enough for school cancellations. I started doing my math homework because I didn't know what else to do. Then I got bored with that and went to work. Then I went home and did school work.

I did get into a snowball fight with Northeastern University students who built snow forts on the route I take to work (the station I use closest to work is on Northeastern's campus). That was fun. That was, however the only interesting thing I've done all week outside of lab.
Strange and Terrible Organ Laminator of Yesterday's Heavy Scene
Sentence or sentence fragment pending

Soy El Vaquero Peludo de Oro

TIM AM I, PRIMARY OF THE EXTRA-ATMOSPHERIC SIMIANS

Nephew Twiddleton

Quote from: Alty on February 06, 2014, 01:23:01 AM
Quote from: Waffleman on February 06, 2014, 01:20:17 AM
I have become boring. :(

That's excellent!
I have feared becoming so, or feeling bored for a long time. It hasn't really happened to me much until recently. Now the sheer pain of it forces me to find new and different ways to do things, things I was previously afraid to do.

Boredom rocks.

Boredom is the father of invention.
Strange and Terrible Organ Laminator of Yesterday's Heavy Scene
Sentence or sentence fragment pending

Soy El Vaquero Peludo de Oro

TIM AM I, PRIMARY OF THE EXTRA-ATMOSPHERIC SIMIANS