OPEN BAR: it rubs the lotion on the skin or it gets the hose again

[Cain]

So long as their level of incompetence matches mine or is slightly less obvious, it's all good.

[Suu]

I think on Thursday during this fucking Nor'easter, I'm going to run outside with a bottle of bourbon and preach the word of the Ice Giants as part of my farewell tour of Providence. What's the WORST that could happen?

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

It is so hard to work on homework when kids are around.

[Suu]

So, this is an actual commission request I just received.

This is my job, kids.

"oh my god yayyyy!!!
Ok, so for colors, I would like a brown for the skirt part and the jacket, I'd like a brown that's a bit darker than the brown in the attached image. I want the shirt part to be a light baby blue. The tie and the suspenders would be the same color. I'd want them to be a deep red, but not like the cartoonish cherry red, you know? I'm so very terrible at describing things I apologize -_- Now, the suspenders don't have to actually be suspenders or anything, they can be made onto the dress. I would like for the bowtie to be a bit bigger than an actual bowtie(maybe like six r seven inches across?) and I'd like it to be an actual bow (like, I don't want it to be 2 dimensional, you know?) I'd prefer for it NOT to be detachable, though.
As for the skirt and shirt thing, you can do whichever would be easier for you! But if you do make two separate pieces, please make sure that the shirt can be tucked in! I'm not allergic to any materials so that shouldn't be a problem.
I would like the skirt to be high waisted (like a few inches above my belly button) and for it to go to my ankle. As for the jacket, I'd like the sleeves to cut off at my elbow. Also the flappy bits on the side should be like, really minimal because I want the suspenders to be visible. I don't want the shirt to be low cut. It can come down a little bit, but I'd prefer for no cleavage to be showing.
my measurements are:
***

So, in total, how much do you think this project will cost?
Sorry for the super lengthy message! Thank you sososososo much for everything!"

I've finishing this bottle of wine tonight.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Were there... ANY pictures or anything to go along with this insane request?

[Cardinal Pizza Deliverance.]

A crayon drawing, a sketch on a napkin . . . SOMETHING?

Jesus fuck.

[Telarus]

  Wow, good luck on that one...

[Cain]

Dishonored Part 5 is up.  Our first target, High Overseer Campbell, gets snuffed in what I believe to be a truly ironic manner.

[LMNO]

On it.

[Suu]

That's it. I quit.

http://fashionablygeek.com/costumes/with-over-100000-rhinestones-this-elsa-costume-is-beyond-dazzling/?_escaped_fragment_=vd4SK#!vrZ5k

[Cain]

On it.

I like to thinK I performed a public service.  Now people know, "don't leave poison in public places".  Because you'll end up like Campbell otherwise.  See?  Educational examples for the masses.

[LMNO]

Or at the very least, build up an immunity to Iocane powder.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

I am having this somewhat surreal Etsy conversation with a customer who doesn't seem to understand that "I'm not taking custom orders because I have returned to school full-time and I don't know when I will have a chance to torch again, but I will keep these styles in mind when I do eventually get back into the studio" means literally what it says. She has been sending me exhaustive lists of beads she wants me to make, and she just sent me this:

"Hi Nigel
Could you please put these beads at the top of the list I sent you to make for me. I love these, they are beautiful. Also could you please make only 2 sets for me at a time due to the cost. I can handle 2. Please let me know when you could possibly get them to me, I do know that you are very busy with school."   

She actually thinks that I'm keeping a list of things to make for her. Does she not understand that "I'll keep it in mind" is not a commitment to actually make anything? C'mon.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Also the pic she sent me is of something I made like ten years ago out of a glass that has long since been discontinued.

[Suu]

I've had to tell a girl no 3 times this week about making a corset for her.



For Valentine's Day.


And yes, the previous request did send me a bad pencil sketch. I think it actually MAY have been on a napkin.