Author Topic: Let's start our own newsfeed, without blackjack or hookers  (Read 2623 times)

LMNO

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Re: Let's start our own newsfeed, without blackjack or hookers
« Reply #15 on: October 24, 2018, 05:29:19 pm »
The most recent economic forecast for New Scotland (formerly Britain) is surprisingly upbeat.

Re: Let's start our own newsfeed, without blackjack or hookers
« Reply #16 on: October 24, 2018, 09:40:23 pm »
Plant placed under tension when growing yields fruit that tastes like bacon.
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Brother Mythos

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Re: Let's start our own newsfeed, without blackjack or hookers
« Reply #17 on: October 26, 2018, 07:59:33 pm »
Unicorn Interrupts Political Rally

A flatulent unicorn horned in on a political rally in Redneckville, Redstate today. The initially rowdy crowd switched from screaming loud choruses of “lock her up,” to singing “Kumbaya” as the unicorn walked among them.

Later, rally participants were seen smiling and waving peace signs as they exited the rally venue.

nullified

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Re: Let's start our own newsfeed, without blackjack or hookers
« Reply #18 on: October 27, 2018, 12:02:13 am »
Unicorn Interrupts Political Rally

A flatulent unicorn horned in on a political rally in Redneckville, Redstate today. The initially rowdy crowd switched from screaming loud choruses of “lock her up,” to singing “Kumbaya” as the unicorn walked among them.

Later, rally participants were seen smiling and waving peace signs as they exited the rally venue.

My sources say it was a Pegasus, not a unicorn. No one captured photographs though, and unicorns are historically more likely to spread peace via violent gut wind. Maybe an expert on the matter like Professor Cramulus could weigh in?
“I am that worst of all type of criminal...I cannot bring myself to do what you tell me, because you told me.”

Brother Mythos

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Re: Let's start our own newsfeed, without blackjack or hookers
« Reply #19 on: October 27, 2018, 12:55:30 am »
NEWS UPDATE

As reported earlier, a flatulent unicorn horned in on a political rally in Redneckville, Redstate today.

This Just In:

Upon exiting the rally venue, participants were greeted by the sight of multiple rainbows. In addition, many in the crowd told our reporter that unicorn farts smell like fried bacon.

Brother Mythos

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Re: Let's start our own newsfeed, without blackjack or hookers
« Reply #20 on: October 27, 2018, 09:39:55 pm »
Suspicious Package Intercepted at White House

A suspicious package addressed to Donald J. Trump was intercepted by Secret Service agents today.

Upon X-raying the package, Public Safety Bomb Technicians determined it contained a dictionary and a copy of the U.S. Constitution.

Brother Mythos

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Re: Let's start our own newsfeed, without blackjack or hookers
« Reply #21 on: October 29, 2018, 02:02:53 am »
Eco-friendly Pizza Box Unfolds Into Solar Panel

A Silicon Valley tech startup company has developed an economical, eco-friendly pizza box that unfolds into a high efficiency electric solar panel.

And, as an added bonus, the designers guarantee, with no batteries required, that the high tech box will keep your pizza “oven hot,” until meal time.

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Brother Mythos

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Re: Let's start our own newsfeed, without blackjack or hookers
« Reply #23 on: October 29, 2018, 04:45:29 am »
Prague's Kafka International Named Most Alienating Airport

That was funny, rong. But, couldn't you, at least, make the effort to plagiarize the ONION®, rather than just copying and pasting their YouTube hyperlink? Is that really too much to ask?

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Re: Let's start our own newsfeed, without blackjack or hookers
« Reply #24 on: October 29, 2018, 05:25:46 am »
Prague's Kafka International Named Most Alienating Airport
"he was a smart feller who felt smart"

Emo Howard

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Re: Let's start our own newsfeed, without blackjack or hookers
« Reply #25 on: October 29, 2018, 06:15:59 am »
and on a lighter note... clowns!

Brother Mythos

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Re: Let's start our own newsfeed, without blackjack or hookers
« Reply #26 on: October 29, 2018, 04:42:08 pm »
Prague's Kafka International Named Most Alienating Airport

That's much better.

LMNO

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Brother Mythos

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Re: Let's start our own newsfeed, without blackjack or hookers
« Reply #28 on: October 29, 2018, 07:24:02 pm »
Just make a bunch of light, harmless, fun posts in this thread as if you're posting status updates from a non-fucked world.


not true

What do you mean NOT TRUE?! How is THAT in keeping with the spirit of this thread?! There's a reason it's called Floriduh!

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Re: Let's start our own newsfeed, without blackjack or hookers
« Reply #29 on: November 01, 2018, 07:35:14 pm »