I'm starting a new thread because the old thread is full of fail and OT and needs to be abandoned. Clean me. If I don't get any good stories out of this one I'll send each of you a tube of salve.
So, current status: Still "almost single". Why my fucking husband won't just finish up this divorce is beyond me. The state won't let us get divorced until he has life insurance. I hate you, Oregon. I fucking hate you.
I just started dating an incredibly hot, incredibly nerdy scooter boi. I really can't believe I'm dating a programmer who rides a scooter; a month ago, before I saw this glamorous thing in a short skirt, I would have said ew. I also suspect him of being a trust-fund baby; just something about him, and how he doesn't have a job and isn't in school and has no debt, but has a nice apartment and a new car. But he is damn pretty, Italian, and likes to dress up as a girl. I am sold.
He is also really "down to eather and ok with what's up", which is good, because this is going nowhere and we are both comfortable with that.
In the meantime, my FBF has been trying for no less than two years to set me up with this guy Mr. Language who is one of her other best friends. Unfortunately, during this time I have been completely unable to pay attention, because first, well, I wrote 55 poems about... it, and then Mario (when I started seeing Mario she threw her hands up and said "Well fuck it. No one can compete with THAT"). But chance is sometimes kind, and the other night hanging out with my friend The Impossibly Short Eclectic Artist on her birthday, Mr. Language came into the Red Fox which is my favorite bar (also the only bar where the owner hugs me) and I had a conversation with him, and it was really good, and suddenly I realized that Mr. Language is quite appealing, in a let's-not-be-hasty way. In a seriously, let's not only not be hasty, but if we go there we had best fucking mean it way.
Which does not at all resolve my other problem, which in terms of Mr. Language becomes a pretty major problem, of having been in love with my non-FBF, who I conscientiously rarely mention, for the last three years, which perhaps I will someday just come to terms with and move past, allowing it to become a background hum as I go on with my stupid love life.
Mr. Language just asked me out. W00t!
I was not aware until yesterday that Mr. Language is also the gentleman responsible for The Legendary Best Date Ever which I have heard about from my FBF at least five hundred times. He's a DJ at one of the local radio stations (DJ's, dammit. He was probably a philosophy major too) and for this date, they hung out at the station and talked and drank and he let her play anything she wanted. This probably wouldn't be MY Best Date Ever; in fact it sounds legendarily tedious, but for her it was epic.
Obviously they didn't work out, but they're really good friends now, which seems like a good sign.
He's in the process of opening a foreign-language school for kids and just generally being awesome.
Glad to hear things are going well. I know it may be that early in the relationship rose colored glasses, but you really sound less conflicted and more generally happy about this guy.
I'm looking forward to seeing how it turns out. Although if it turns out too well it may stop satisfying my need to enjoy the misfortunes of others.
fingers crossed Nigel. :D
Thanks!
I'm a little concerned about being hung up on He Whom We Will Not Name, but I'll deal with it when/if it becomes an obstacle. I don't even know if I'm going to have chemistry with Mr. Language yet; no need to worry beyond the first date at this point.
Seems like, yet again, we seem to be leading a parallel love life Nigel. Since that's basically how I feel about Cute Assyrian Nerd.
No matter! Cute boys, flirting, and dates are always fun! Right? :D
Quote from: Sparkley Pink Shit on April 18, 2010, 04:09:58 PM
Seems like, yet again, we seem to be leading a parallel love life Nigel. Since that's basically how I feel about Cute Assyrian Nerd.
No matter! Cute boys, flirting, and dates are always fun! Right? :D
ALWAYS! ESPECIALLY WHEN THEY JAM THEIR FINGER IN YOUR EAR!
(or have a jar full of teeth.)
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 18, 2010, 04:11:49 PM
Quote from: Sparkley Pink Shit on April 18, 2010, 04:09:58 PM
Seems like, yet again, we seem to be leading a parallel love life Nigel. Since that's basically how I feel about Cute Assyrian Nerd.
No matter! Cute boys, flirting, and dates are always fun! Right? :D
ALWAYS! ESPECIALLY WHEN THEY JAM THEIR FINGER IN YOUR EAR!
(or have a jar full of teeth.)
These are the
highlights. :lulz:
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 18, 2010, 04:11:49 PM
Quote from: Sparkley Pink Shit on April 18, 2010, 04:09:58 PM
Seems like, yet again, we seem to be leading a parallel love life Nigel. Since that's basically how I feel about Cute Assyrian Nerd.
No matter! Cute boys, flirting, and dates are always fun! Right? :D
ALWAYS! ESPECIALLY WHEN THEY JAM THEIR FINGER IN YOUR EAR!
(or have a jar full of teeth.)
:lulz:
Where do you people find them? I never have creepy hilarious dates.
OH and good luck with Señor Idiomas!
Ooooh I think I just got some kind of 21st-century Facebook serenaded! He posted a link to this: http://www.youtube.com/user/CoolPomegranate#p/u/16/bKTZhyY5-VM
I gotta get outta the house I can't believe I was checking Facebook at 1:15 on a sunny Sunday afternoon.
So: Scooter Boi texts me at 7:30 on a Sunday night to see if I wanna hang out
Mr. Language emails me a week in advance to see if I might be available next Saturday.
Hello, Mr. Language.
Ah planning...what a concept! Lol
Yeah, it's nice when people assume I might have a life.
HEY NIGEL
ARE YOU BUSY IN LIEK 30 SECONDS FROM NOW? YOU SHOULD TOTALLY COME OVER AND HANG OUT
Quote from: Sparkley Pink Shit on April 20, 2010, 06:40:07 AM
HEY NIGEL
ARE YOU BUSY IN LIEK 30 SECONDS FROM NOW? YOU SHOULD TOTALLY COME OVER AND HANG OUT
:lulz:
I've been reading some of Mr. Language's work on privilege; it almost kind of makes me wish he was on the board, because he has a lot to say that I think most of the people here would find interesting.
I'm not quite ready to be
that naked in front of him, though. He makes me kind of nervous; he's intellectually formidable.
Ohh I know what you mean... But does he talk as if he went to Finishing school or the likes?
See how he goes with the dinner plan :)
No finishing school sort, just talks like a normal college graduate. Kind of rough-and-tumble in some ways, and very handy with building things and whatnot, as well as whatever it is he does... opening schools and making documentaries and radio DJing and generally making the rest of us look like boring chumps. He's from Tuscon originally (should I be afraid, Dok?) and then spent some years in Honduras doing something with poor people. Hopefully not murdering them for organs.
On a completely unrelated subject, I got proposed to by one of my friends, again, and I'm starting to think he might not be kidding. It's a little disturbing. He wants a babby. I don't want any more babbys.
I has pretty Italian boy. :) Ohhh pretty!
So I had my second/third date with Scooter Boi/crossdresser last night. It was great! We discussed important factors, such as that he does not want a girlfriend right now and that I don't want anyone to move into my house, ever. Also his feelings won't be hurt if I suddenly fall in love with someone else.
In honor of Mark Growden I am renaming him Fuck Boy. I wish there was a decent recording of that song because he's stopped performing it. That's one thing about some people when they stop doing drugs; for some reason they become prudes. WTF. Half of what makes Growden great is that he's a lascivious bastard... or was, anyway. :cry:
Mr. Language shaved all of his facial hair and it turns out he is ridiculously handsome. I had no idea!
Last night we agreed that we are dating. This is the weirdest courtship ever; he still hasn't even tried to kiss me. On Sunday we are driving out to Beaverton to do something mysterious that he says I've probably never done before; I'm not sure whether to be afraid, but he is from Tucson.
First impulses are usually best but not always long term best
I thought you kept a fully stocked man stable.
Quote from: Hawk on May 03, 2010, 05:09:55 PM
I thought you kept a fully stocked man stable.
Right now it's only Fuck Boy and Mr. Language. I no longer sleep with Surfer Boy because we became really good friends and decided to just do that instead. I'm really not into the hippie, even though he's really sweet and cute, and the other one isn't really worth mentioning.
I don't really have time for more than two, anyway.
I'm jealous. My junk doesn't work anymore.
That's why I gotta make the most of this while everything's still reasonably young and functional. :lulz:
Quote from: The Lord and Lady Omnibus Fuck on May 03, 2010, 05:32:39 PM
That's why I gotta make the most of this while everything's still reasonably young and functional. :lulz:
Quote from: Hawk on May 03, 2010, 05:22:58 PM
I'm jealous. My junk doesn't work anymore.
:(
Stupid pills
Quote from: Sparkley Pink Shit on May 05, 2010, 05:53:03 AM
Quote from: The Lord and Lady Omnibus Fuck on May 03, 2010, 05:32:39 PM
That's why I gotta make the most of this while everything's still reasonably young and functional. :lulz:
Quote from: Hawk on May 03, 2010, 05:22:58 PM
I'm jealous. My junk doesn't work anymore.
:(
Stupid pills
Lexapro = limp.
No Lexapro = raging asshole.
Either way I loose.
Using my new mad pick-up skills, I texted Fuck Boy "Want to make sandwiches? I mean, watch a movie and drink beer?"
He does. :)
My best pickup text ever was "I just made bread. Come fuck my bread. Er, eat me out."
Quote from: Hawk on May 05, 2010, 02:26:26 PM
Quote from: Sparkley Pink Shit on May 05, 2010, 05:53:03 AM
Quote from: The Lord and Lady Omnibus Fuck on May 03, 2010, 05:32:39 PM
That's why I gotta make the most of this while everything's still reasonably young and functional. :lulz:
Quote from: Hawk on May 03, 2010, 05:22:58 PM
I'm jealous. My junk doesn't work anymore.
:(
Stupid pills
Lexapro = limp.
No Lexapro = raging asshole.
Either way I loose.
Viagra?
Also, my dosage was lowered recently, and I just "experimented" and am finally satisfied with the results. :D
Guess my problem sorta took care of itself!
Other than the fact that the movie we watched (La Moustache, which about five people recommended to me, apparently solely on the basis that it was kind of about a moustache) was a huge steaming pile of French WTF, the date was very good. I learned his middle name (which is every bit as overwhelmingly Italian as his first and last, and which I had already guessed... it was either that or Antonio), and he seems to think that I am the most "interesting" person on the planet. In other words, I think I am a novelty toy again.
I'm OK with that, he's a smokin' hot scooter boy. We can be mutually novel.
Also last night, I learned that my fragile flower, who I will henceforth call Angelo, was in the Navy. He regaled me with stories that belie his seemingly delicate constitution. Go figure!
Quote from: The Lord and Lady Omnibus Fuck on May 03, 2010, 04:57:05 PM
Mr. Language shaved all of his facial hair and it turns out he is ridiculously handsome. I had no idea!
Last night we agreed that we are dating. This is the weirdest courtship ever; he still hasn't even tried to kiss me. On Sunday we are driving out to Beaverton to do something mysterious that he says I've probably never done before; I'm not sure whether to be afraid, but he is from Tucson.
He is a keeper.
Quote from: BADGE OF HONOR on May 05, 2010, 09:56:04 PM
My best pickup text ever was "I just made bread. Come fuck my bread. Er, eat me out."
Ahahahahaaha thats a good one!
Quote from: Professor Freeky on May 07, 2010, 02:07:10 AM
Quote from: The Lord and Lady Omnibus Fuck on May 03, 2010, 04:57:05 PM
Mr. Language shaved all of his facial hair and it turns out he is ridiculously handsome. I had no idea!
Last night we agreed that we are dating. This is the weirdest courtship ever; he still hasn't even tried to kiss me. On Sunday we are driving out to Beaverton to do something mysterious that he says I've probably never done before; I'm not sure whether to be afraid, but he is from Tucson.
He is a keeper.
We shall see!
Quote from: Professor Freeky on May 07, 2010, 02:07:10 AM
Quote from: The Lord and Lady Omnibus Fuck on May 03, 2010, 04:57:05 PM
Mr. Language shaved all of his facial hair and it turns out he is ridiculously handsome. I had no idea!
Last night we agreed that we are dating. This is the weirdest courtship ever; he still hasn't even tried to kiss me. On Sunday we are driving out to Beaverton to do something mysterious that he says I've probably never done before; I'm not sure whether to be afraid, but he is from Tucson.
He is a keeper.
HE'S A HORRIBLE FREAK!
HE'LL WIND UP DRAGGING HER DOWN WITH HIM WHEN THE GRAVITY CATCHES UP!
Quote from: Doktor Howl on May 07, 2010, 02:56:00 AM
Quote from: Professor Freeky on May 07, 2010, 02:07:10 AM
Quote from: The Lord and Lady Omnibus Fuck on May 03, 2010, 04:57:05 PM
Mr. Language shaved all of his facial hair and it turns out he is ridiculously handsome. I had no idea!
Last night we agreed that we are dating. This is the weirdest courtship ever; he still hasn't even tried to kiss me. On Sunday we are driving out to Beaverton to do something mysterious that he says I've probably never done before; I'm not sure whether to be afraid, but he is from Tucson.
He is a keeper.
HE'S A HORRIBLE FREAK!
HE'LL WIND UP DRAGGING HER DOWN WITH HIM WHEN THE GRAVITY CATCHES UP!
I DON'T WANT TO END UP IN TUCSON! :x
Quote from: The Lord and Lady Omnibus Fuck on May 07, 2010, 03:19:08 AM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on May 07, 2010, 02:56:00 AM
Quote from: Professor Freeky on May 07, 2010, 02:07:10 AM
Quote from: The Lord and Lady Omnibus Fuck on May 03, 2010, 04:57:05 PM
Mr. Language shaved all of his facial hair and it turns out he is ridiculously handsome. I had no idea!
Last night we agreed that we are dating. This is the weirdest courtship ever; he still hasn't even tried to kiss me. On Sunday we are driving out to Beaverton to do something mysterious that he says I've probably never done before; I'm not sure whether to be afraid, but he is from Tucson.
He is a keeper.
HE'S A HORRIBLE FREAK!
HE'LL WIND UP DRAGGING HER DOWN WITH HIM WHEN THE GRAVITY CATCHES UP!
I DON'T WANT TO END UP IN TUCSON! :x
YES YOU DO!
Last night a friend took me out for Mother's Day. Last thing I remember we were sitting at the bar laughing at some 24-year-old who thought he was smooth-talking us. This morning I woke up buck nekkid and sore everywhere, with my big black Feeldoe next to me.
Oh dear.
This evening, the supremely chaste Mr. Language and I had our third date, which was Korean food followed by a private karaoke room. At the end of the evening, I got a hug. And we are hanging out again next week. I can't figure out if he is EVER going to kiss me.
Quote from: The Lord and Lady Omnibus Fuck on May 10, 2010, 09:15:32 AM
Last night a friend took me out for Mother's Day. Last thing I remember we were sitting at the bar laughing at some 24-year-old who thought he was smooth-talking us. This morning I woke up buck nekkid and sore everywhere, with my big black Feeldoe next to me.
Oh dear.
This evening, the supremely chaste Mr. Language and I had our third date, which was Korean food followed by a private karaoke room. At the end of the evening, I got a hug. And we are hanging out again next week. I can't figure out if he is EVER going to kiss me.
:lulz:
Sounds like you had a good time!
I had an erection the other day. I held on until pee was coming out my eyes IN REMEMBRANCE OF.
Tonight, he comes to my house for the first time. I'm glad I got all the Goodwill-destined crap off my front porch!
I am shaven, oiled, perfumed, and schminked to within an inch of my life.
Wow. So.
GREAT date, we had an awesome time and blah blah blahed until about two minutes ago. I know I looked pretty, my schmink was subtle yet enhancing, and I'm wearing one of my halter dresses with the cleavage (but not too much cleavage) that makes me look particularly like something out of a Spanish villa. Oh, and the sexy (but not too sexy) green bondage shoes that everybody comments on. He told me I looked great and said he wants to spend more time together, like maybe a whole day out hiking or something.
The good news is that we got past hand-holding.
The bad news is that the next stop past hand-holding seems to be a couple of hugs.
Is this some sort of slowboat seduction technique? I don't know what to do with this guy.
aww hes wooing you
ps does he wear a cape that he takes off so you dont have to step in puddles?
he's gay.
My ex was gay. I am pretty sure this one's not, but, hell, I could make the same mistake twice.
That's what cute assyrian nerd does too. Maybe I can coax more out of him at the Museum on Weds. Prob not though.
What is up with funny boys who are clearly courting but not sexing?
Play along - chianti and poetry on a hill at sunset.
Quote from: The Lord and Lady Omnibus Fuck on May 17, 2010, 05:27:29 PM
What is up with funny boys who are clearly courting but not sexing?
I'm blaming CAN's behavior on it being cultural since he's from Iran, and has only lived in the US for a few years for college. It's not something I'm looking for relationship wise but it's kinda fun to be treated like a delicate lady from time to time. :)
This boy does not treat me like a delicate lady. He is very anti-chivalry or other displays he considers sexist. This is quite disorienting, because I'm used to having doors opened for me, etc.
But opening doors is not sexist. It's just polite...I open doors for other people if I make it first, and if someone beats me it's always nice to have someone hold the door for me rather than to let it fall in my face.
Quote from: Sparkley Pink Shit on May 17, 2010, 05:42:20 PM
But opening doors is not sexist. It's just polite...I open doors for other people if I make it first, and if someone beats me it's always nice to have someone hold the door for me rather than to let it fall in my face.
If he gets to the door first, he opens it and holds it for me. Most men I've been with, though, make a point of ALWAYS opening the door, and opening and closing the car door for me, always doing the driving, etc. so I've gotten used to it.
He APOLOGIZED for opening my car door for me last night. He said "I know this looks like chivalry, but it's just that the locks are funny, I promise" as if I would be offended if I thought he was opening the door for me because I'm a woman, and his date.
Nigel, it sounds like Mr. Language has indeed been Touched by Tucson. I'm afraid this is a life-long condition, and he's not going to get "better," although I doubt he'll get any worse, unless he comes back.
:lol:
In this day and age, it's a potentially lose/lose situation. I've gotten glares for not rushing ahead and opening/holding doors for women, and I've also been scolded for treating women as if they are too weak and incapable of getting their own damn door.
It really is, and I don't understand why some women think it's offensive. I think it's just nice.
But I suppose it's dying the sort of way table manners are. I mean, I hardly see parents who teach their kids not to eat like a slob these days. Which, unfortunately, is one of my MAJOR pet peeves. I just cant take the mouth smacking. Seriously, just CHEW WITH YOUR TRAP SHUT UGH! :argh!:
Quote from: Sparkley Pink Shit on May 17, 2010, 06:20:43 PM
It really is, and I don't understand why some women think it's offensive. I think it's just nice.
But I suppose it's dying the sort of way table manners are. I mean, I hardly see parents who teach their kids not to eat like a slob these days. Which, unfortunately, is one of my MAJOR pet peeves. I just cant take the mouth smacking. Seriously, just CHEW WITH YOUR TRAP SHUT UGH! :argh!:
That's so gross. :vom:
At the same time, while it is a nice courtesy for a guy to hold the door, et al, should a woman be offended if he doesn't? Because the amount of shit guys get for not doing this seems pretty disproportionate. I mean, if it's just common courtesy, why aren't women expected to do it? You know, a general rule: "whoever is first to the door, hold it open for others." Why is it a "men only" rule?
Quote from: LMNO on May 17, 2010, 06:26:24 PM
At the same time, while it is a nice courtesy for a guy to hold the door, et al, should a woman be offended if he doesn't? Because the amount of shit guys get for not doing this seems pretty disproportionate. I mean, if it's just common courtesy, why aren't women expected to do it? You know, a general rule: "whoever is first to the door, hold it open for others. Why is it a "men only" rule?
That's silly. Doors are just doors, and everyone knows how to open them.
Quote from: LMNO on May 17, 2010, 06:26:24 PM
At the same time, while it is a nice courtesy for a guy to hold the door, et al, should a woman be offended if he doesn't? Because the amount of shit guys get for not doing this seems pretty disproportionate. I mean, if it's just common courtesy, why aren't women expected to do it? You know, a general rule: "whoever is first to the door, hold it open for others." Why is it a "men only" rule?
I don't think it should be a men only rule, because that is sexist. Everyone can open a door. IMO it's just good manners for whoever gets there first to open the door for whoever after them.
I'm not offended if my date doesn't open the door for me, I'm just not used to it.
If I'm not on a date, it doesn't matter who gets the door. These are mating rituals I'm talking about.
If a lady acts offended because I hold the door, that's my cue to not stick around. It's like, pardon the fuck out of me, I didn't realize we were at an Ayn Rand convention.
Nigel just rape the fucker.
I'll probably have to. However, there is something kind of exciting about all the suspense.
He may just be afraid that by making a first move he will run you off. Very tenderly place your hand on his lower stomach and ask him if you are ever going to make love.
Alternatively, ask him when he's gonna let you tap dat.
Bend him over, and make him make THAT SOUND.
:x :1fap:
Ya know... women are allowed to make the first move. :wink:
Yes, both I and the musician I raped last night are well aware.
Mr. Language is different. He needs to be treated like a delicate flower; a lady.
Also, we've discussed it and I said I would be patient. I may end up making the first move, but not until he's ready.
Quote from: Hawk on May 03, 2010, 05:09:55 PM
I thought you kept a fully stocked man stable.
Reminds me of the line from Hotel California:
She's got a lot of pretty, pretty boys / she calls friends
Quote from: Kai on May 24, 2010, 09:27:07 PM
Quote from: Hawk on May 03, 2010, 05:09:55 PM
I thought you kept a fully stocked man stable.
Reminds me of the line from Hotel California:
She's got a lot of pretty, pretty boys / she calls friends
I love that song. :)
That song always gave me chills when I was a kid.
Right now my stupid love life isn't really stupid at all. :) I don't know what beautiful providence shook the boy tree while I was standing under it, but three of the most lovely, unique, wonderful men I've ever met have fallen into my life over the last couple of months. Gorgeous, strong, frustrating, delightful, forthright souls, and they couldn't be more different from each other.
It's going to be a great summer.
Quote from: Sigmatic on May 23, 2010, 08:55:46 PM
If a lady acts offended because I hold the door, that's my cue to not stick around. It's like, pardon the fuck out of me, I didn't realize we were at an Ayn Rand convention.
I missed this earlier, and it makes me :lulz:
An update on Mr. Language: the other day he came over, and we drove to my favorite hiking trail. I was not raised Catholic, nor even religious in any way other than my mother's vague interpretation of nature/earth/ancestor spirituality, but I have formed this notion that there are 12 stations on this trail. The first 3 are:
1. A pond
2. A Buddhist shrine on an island in the stream at the trail fork
3. Three rocks inset with plaques, under the power lines, commemorating "Fixing the Hole" which would be too time-consuming to explain here.
I have not yet discovered the other 9 stations, but I am certain I will.
At the pond, we kept having awkward silences, which eventually Mr. Language started making fun of. Essentially, we would be talking, and then there would be a pause, in which I would be looking up at him, offering my face and my eyes and my mouth to him, and he would make a joke about how that would have been a perfect time to kiss me.
And it would have.
We walked on. I am very short and he is very tall, which only matters when we talk, which is all the time.
It is hard to explain how his refusal to kiss me intensifies my interest. Unlike any other man I have been with, he is in complete control of this relationship.
Day of Discord hot dog BBQ in the park, rain falling hard, harder, impossibly hard like sheets of wet assaulting the arched canopy of oak and maple. Little band of revelers laughing, shivering, eating wet hot dogs and corn dogs and pork rinds and artificially-red-flavored sponge-like snack cakes, drinking Pabst Blue Ribbon out of styrofoam cups. Blue-eyed stranger, clearly crazy laughing singing at the end of the table. I saw him when he arrived, hooded mystery goat-beard man. He looks like my He Whom We Will Not Name, except he doesn't; there's just something about him. The hood and the goat-beard, the pale eyes, only these eyes are an unreal shade of light aqua blue.
Aqua.
Decision was made instantly, this pale-eyed stranger.
"I don't know what's happening; all I know is that wherever you're going, I'm following you."
Hours later, drinks later (but not too many drinks) I was just going to kiss his cheek, that spot at the corner of his jaw where I could catch his scent, but he intercepted me with smooth lips and rough stubble and tongue and sweetness.
In the morning, I asked about the scar on his back but he doesn't remember getting it. I suppose that compared to the other scar, eight angry inches bisecting his smooth young perfect belly, a little half-inch gash wouldn't have been memorable.
IF I WASN'T HAPPILY MARRIED AND IMPOTENT YOU COULD STICK YOUR FINGER IN MY EAR AND DAY.
Quote from: Hawk on May 25, 2010, 10:23:46 PM
IF I WASN'T HAPPILY MARRIED AND IMPOTENT YOU COULD STICK YOUR FINGER IN MY EAR AND DAY.
:lulz: Love you too, Hawk.
Quote from: The Lord and Lady Omnibus Fuck on May 25, 2010, 10:26:51 PM
Quote from: Hawk on May 25, 2010, 10:23:46 PM
IF I WASN'T HAPPILY MARRIED AND IMPOTENT YOU COULD STICK YOUR FINGER IN MY EAR AND DAY.
:lulz: Love you too, Hawk.
:lulz:
Mr Language.
We have been on five dates and he refuses to kiss me. I asked him, finally, after the third date, and he said that he is struggling with a barrier.
The barrier is that he is in love with another woman.
She lives in LA and is nearly 20 years younger than him. Than us. This does not bother me, because I am in love with my best friend, and I don't anticipate that changing. He lives in Portland but might as well live in LA. Maybe I can send him there, to live with Mr. Language's beautiful young love.
Everything is changing soon, he says. He has an idea, a plan. Sunday, he says. It will be memorable, and it will be something I've never done before, he says. I am in knots, trying to figure out what it is that he is so certain I've never done before. He will tell me on Friday, he says.
For his plan to work I have to know about it in advance. He says.
He is a tease, this Mr. Language. He barely touches me, won't let me close. He will take my hand at the end of a date, and he will allow a brief hug. He is a handsome man, with mad-professor hair, a Polish nose, and dark-ringed bright blue eyes. A scar extends through his lower lip, and there is a scar on his chin. He says the bone showed through. I am curious to find his other scars, and he knows this.
His great strength is in his words; he is a great crafter of language, a master. He frames seemingly innocent texts to have subtly suggestive subtexts, knowing what will go through my head. He freely admits to baiting me; he says my frustration delights him. He says I am refreshing. His reticence arouses me, and he likes knowing that. This is the shape of our courtship.
For the first time in a long time, I am completely not at all in control of the situation. I am bewildered. Who is driving relationship?
Mr. Language is driving relationship.
Nigel, I'm all "EEEEE!" in delight for you! :D
Thanks Freeky!
MUST
POST
DETAILS
:D
How about a pic?
(http://sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/photos-ak-snc1/v368/111/89/635212921/n635212921_1621325_1183.jpg)
I am sure I will post details... but not TOO many details.
I like Scrabble. A lot. I used to play various versions of Scrabble with a friend, including co-operative Scrabble, swear word Scrabble, made-up-word Scrabble, aesthetically pleasing Scrabble, and story Scrabble, in which we had to write a story using every word on the board. I am not especially good at Scrabble, but I am especially good at having fun, and Scrabble is fun. Other than Scrabble, I hate board games. They fill me with dread.
Talking, Mr. Language and I lowered some barriers, made our way to another level of intimacy. I like this new level. It makes me nervous, but in a pleasant way.
This TED talk has been on my mind a lot lately: http://www.ted.com/talks/lang/eng/helen_fisher_tells_us_why_we_love_cheat.html
This is one by my favorite biophysicist: http://www.ted.com/talks/lang/eng/luca_t...scent.html
I was reading the biography of Luca Turin on the train to Seattle last Spring, on my way to meet a lover. My heart was sore from losing Grendelmouse, and I was about halfway through my Laments. I want to quote Turin, but I can't find the book; he speaks of a perfume called Paradox, and says that it is the scent of beautiful heartbreak.
I am trying to put the parts of this story in the right order. They all have to do with each other.
I did not notice until I read that book that my perfumes are associated with particular lovers, and when we part ways I don't wear that scent anymore. I have a shelf of half-used perfumes, and it is interesting to me to note who gets a perfume, and who doesn't.
In the midst of my own beautiful heartbreak, on the train running away from Portland, I became obsessed with acquiring Paradox, and in Seattle my lover, indulgently, took me to a few perfume counters trying to find it. Finally, on a tip from one of the salesgirls, he called the largest perfume house in Seattle, who told him that the only place to buy Paradox on the West Coast is the perfume house in Portland.
Odor is such a fundamental element in attraction. I played Scrabble once on a first date with a beautiful half-Seminole bartender. I knew I would sleep with him as soon as I shook his hand and got a whiff of his scent. Some people are nearly odorless; others are almost overwhelming, but it's the basic nature of that underlying odor that determines attraction. Mario stinks; he is easily the smelliest man I have ever been with, and if I were to describe his odor it would sound repulsive, but to me it was an aphrodisiac. He said that he didn't have to turn to look when I approached; he could recognize me by my scent. There is a very, very expensive and barely-used bottle of Mitsouko hidden away in a box in my bedside drawer; I bought it and started wearing it instead of Paradox the day I decided to accept that I was falling in love with him.
Very shortly before my first date with Mr. Language, I purchased a bottle of Shalimar. I have not been wearing it.
He asks if I want to play Scrabble.
Holy shit, as if just not kissing me wasn't driving me crazy enough, he's started writing emails with... um... erotic elements.
FFFFFFFUUUUUU... :crankey:
Shalimar is amazing. And Scrabble, too.
Quote from: The Lord and Lady Omnibus Fuck on May 27, 2010, 08:13:00 PM
Holy shit, as if just not kissing me wasn't driving me crazy enough, he's started writing emails with... um... erotic elements.
FFFFFFFUUUUUU... :crankey:
You are in trouble, I think. :D
Quote from: Hover Cat on May 27, 2010, 08:20:58 PM
Shalimar is amazing. And Scrabble, too.
Quote from: The Lord and Lady Omnibus Fuck on May 27, 2010, 08:13:00 PM
Holy shit, as if just not kissing me wasn't driving me crazy enough, he's started writing emails with... um... erotic elements.
FFFFFFFUUUUUU... :crankey:
You are in trouble, I think. :D
Yeah, I think I'm all kinds of fucked-up over this one.
He reminded me that tomorrow he tells me The Plan. :eek:
Quote from: The Lord and Lady Omnibus Fuck on May 26, 2010, 12:57:44 AM
How about a pic?
(http://sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/photos-ak-snc1/v368/111/89/635212921/n635212921_1621325_1183.jpg)
I am sure I will post details... but not TOO many details.
hehe, he looks like a dissipated artist.
How about a couple more where he looks even more like a dissipated artist?
(http://sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc3/hs494.snc3/27005_346131181658_737241658_3752713_8242773_n.jpg)
WITH A STACHE:
(http://sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc3/hs043.snc3/13070_178651221658_737241658_3062226_4113644_n.jpg)
the with a stache pic he looks slightly like a creepy killer. But in a sexy way. Like he loves you so much he has to kill you so that life cannot taint your perfection.
Quote from: BabylonHoruv on May 28, 2010, 03:34:34 AM
the with a stache pic he looks slightly like a creepy killer. But in a sexy way. Like he loves you so much he has to kill you so that life cannot taint your perfection.
Hahahaha oh god.
Aaaaaaaaaaahhh he called me "Earnest", "Guileless", and "Refreshing".
WHAT :crankey:
I have been granted knowledge of "The Plan".
On the evening of Sunday, May 30th, Mr. Salt "Language" McDade and Ms. Lord and Lady Omnibus Fuck will celebrate six weeks of proper courtship by dressing in fancy clothing, going out to a nice dinner, and posting flyers announcing their impending kiss, which will take place upon the stroke of midnight at an as-yet undisclosed destination which is known only to be "a high place". The kiss will take place after consuming an entire bottle of wine, to the accompaniment of a soundtrack preselected by Mr. McDade.
You guys were right. Tucson produces CRAZY PEOPLE.
Quote from: The Lord and Lady Omnibus Fuck on May 28, 2010, 09:46:10 PM
I have been granted knowledge of "The Plan".
On the evening of Sunday, May 30th, Mr. Salt "Language" McDade and Ms. Lord and Lady Omnibus Fuck will celebrate six weeks of proper courtship by dressing in fancy clothing, going out to a nice dinner, and posting flyers announcing their impending kiss, which will take place upon the stroke of midnight at an as-yet undisclosed destination which is known only to be "a high place". The kiss will take place after consuming an entire bottle of wine, to the accompaniment of a soundtrack preselected by Mr. McDade.
You guys were right. Tucson produces CRAZY PEOPLE.
Hot damn, you struck it lucky, woman! Seriously, you could do a lot worse with a Tucson freak. And by worse, I mean creepy. So congrats!
Thanks! I think he's probably a winner... time will tell. I mean, I haven't even kissed him yet!
That's also one of most seriously romantic thing I've ever heard that actually happened, as opposed to it happening in a fiction story or something.
Quote from: Professor Freeky on May 29, 2010, 01:13:11 AM
That's also one of most seriously romantic thing I've ever heard that actually happened, as opposed to it happening in a fiction story or something.
He seems to have a real knack for the romance. He's also adorable and nerdy and a social activist for immigrant rights.
That's awesome. :)
Nigel, I consider this thread a success. Your love life is significantly less stupid than mine, and WAY more interesting to hear about from a third-person perspective.
Thanks! It's a damn sight better than it was when it was completely stupid.
Salt McDade says I scare him a little. Funny, because I am completely at his mercy...
Best. Date. Ever. I can't wait to hear an update with how it goes tonight! :D
It's tomorrow.
Last night and this morning have been full of a really intense combination of simultaneous texting and emailing, allowing us to have several conversations at once. Holy shit. Really, really heavy conversations.
Quote from: The Lord and Lady Omnibus Fuck on May 29, 2010, 08:37:18 PM
It's tomorrow.
Last night and this morning have been full of a really intense combination of simultaneous texting and emailing, allowing us to have several conversations at once. Holy shit. Really, really heavy conversations.
Well, conversation is good. :D
Yes?
Quote from: Professor Freeky on May 29, 2010, 08:52:27 PM
Quote from: The Lord and Lady Omnibus Fuck on May 29, 2010, 08:37:18 PM
It's tomorrow.
Last night and this morning have been full of a really intense combination of simultaneous texting and emailing, allowing us to have several conversations at once. Holy shit. Really, really heavy conversations.
Well, conversation is good. :D
Yes?
God, yes! Also, exhausting.
Also, I realized that I have never spoken with him on the phone. Not even once. I am wondering how long I can keep it that way.
In non-glamour-shots he kind of looks like a geeky professor.
(http://sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/photos-ak-snc1/v799/111/89/635212921/n635212921_1679937_3487.jpg)
I like it.
Also, why is EVERY picture of him grainy and dark?
in this case, because of the backlight of the windows, causing the camera to underexpose. but never mind that :)
Quote from: The Lord and Lady Omnibus Fuck on May 28, 2010, 09:46:10 PM
I have been granted knowledge of "The Plan".
On the evening of Sunday, May 30th, Mr. Salt "Language" McDade and Ms. Lord and Lady Omnibus Fuck will celebrate six weeks of proper courtship by dressing in fancy clothing, going out to a nice dinner, and posting flyers announcing their impending kiss, which will take place upon the stroke of midnight at an as-yet undisclosed destination which is known only to be "a high place". The kiss will take place after consuming an entire bottle of wine, to the accompaniment of a soundtrack preselected by Mr. McDade.
:mittens: to mr Language! that guy is SERIOUS about being romantic!
Quote from: Triple Zero on May 29, 2010, 09:56:12 PM
in this case, because of the backlight of the windows, causing the camera to underexpose. but never mind that :)
Quote from: The Lord and Lady Omnibus Fuck on May 28, 2010, 09:46:10 PM
I have been granted knowledge of "The Plan".
On the evening of Sunday, May 30th, Mr. Salt "Language" McDade and Ms. Lord and Lady Omnibus Fuck will celebrate six weeks of proper courtship by dressing in fancy clothing, going out to a nice dinner, and posting flyers announcing their impending kiss, which will take place upon the stroke of midnight at an as-yet undisclosed destination which is known only to be "a high place". The kiss will take place after consuming an entire bottle of wine, to the accompaniment of a soundtrack preselected by Mr. McDade.
:mittens: to mr Language! that guy is SERIOUS about being romantic!
Yeah, he really really is. :)
Quote from: The Lord and Lady Omnibus Fuck on May 29, 2010, 09:41:03 PM
In non-glamour-shots he kind of looks like a geeky professor.
(http://sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/photos-ak-snc1/v799/111/89/635212921/n635212921_1679937_3487.jpg)
I like it.
Also, why is EVERY picture of him grainy and dark?
BUENO!!! :lulz: Kidding.
The day began with an hourly countdown until midnight. I made the flyers (SICKENINGLY twee!) and went to his house to meet him, then we went to Hawthorne to staple posters to poles. At one point we went into Fred Meyer for a bottle of wine, and I gave the cashier a flyer, which started a dialogue wherein she asked obvious questions, like "Wait, you've been dating for six weeks and you still haven't kissed? Do you WANT to kiss? Why haven't you done it yet?"
Then, he took me to Portland City Grill, where they assumed that "first kiss" meant "anniversary of first kiss", and brought us a little puff pastry dessert as congratulations. Then we went to Pix, and had a framboise float and a chocolate stout float. THEN, up to the Grotto, which we snuck into via a gap in the fence, found a not-too-wet log to sit on, and waited like nervous teenagers until midnight.
It was a nice kiss, is all I'll say about that.
Then we opened the wine and drank and talked and made out until about 2:40, crept out, and went to my house where we cuddled (in pajamas!) until we fell asleep. In the morning, he realized that his phone was missing so we went back to the Grotto, and then, driving around the back, found an amazing, AMAZING place with rocks and cliffs and a cave. We're going to go back when the weather warms up a bit!
Then we went and had sausages at Old Country Sausage, and I took him home. Whew! I'm so tired. But it was the best date I've EVER had.
So awesome. :D
Quote from: The Lord and Lady Omnibus Fuck on June 01, 2010, 12:23:22 AM
The day began with an hourly countdown until midnight. I made the flyers (SICKENINGLY twee!) and went to his house to meet him, then we went to Hawthorne to staple posters to poles. At one point we went into Fred Meyer for a bottle of wine, and I gave the cashier a flyer, which started a dialogue wherein she asked obvious questions, like "Wait, you've been dating for six weeks and you still haven't kissed? Do you WANT to kiss? Why haven't you done it yet?"
Then, he took me to Portland City Grill, where they assumed that "first kiss" meant "anniversary of first kiss", and brought us a little puff pastry dessert as congratulations. Then we went to Pix, and had a framboise float and a chocolate stout float. THEN, up to the Grotto, which we snuck into via a gap in the fence, found a not-too-wet log to sit on, and waited like nervous teenagers until midnight.
It was a nice kiss, is all I'll say about that.
Then we opened the wine and drank and talked and made out until about 2:40, crept out, and went to my house where we cuddled (in pajamas!) until we fell asleep. In the morning, he realized that his phone was missing so we went back to the Grotto, and then, driving around the back, found an amazing, AMAZING place with rocks and cliffs and a cave. We're going to go back when the weather warms up a bit!
Then we went and had sausages at Old Country Sausage, and I took him home. Whew! I'm so tired. But it was the best date I've EVER had.
You know? That would be like the best fucking date evar. I'll die a happy man if I end up on a date half that good :)
It WAS the best date EVAR. I've been on a lot of dates, and that one was hands-down the most epically awesome date I've ever been on.
Totally stealing that date idea.
Dude is a romance guru.
Now I wonder what is going to happen on teh secks date!
Quote from: Hawk on June 03, 2010, 11:22:21 AM
Now I wonder what is going to happen on teh secks date!
Probably something like being taken up in one of those private low-orbit space flight crafts, then being ejected and making love while falling to Earth in a giant reinforced Zorb ball.
(http://blog-imgs-26.fc2.com/b/a/r/barefootgirl/a_zorb-733232.jpg)
Quote from: Cainad on June 03, 2010, 03:38:14 PM
Quote from: Hawk on June 03, 2010, 11:22:21 AM
Now I wonder what is going to happen on teh secks date!
Probably something like being taken up in one of those private low-orbit space flight crafts, then being ejected and making love while falling to Earth in a giant reinforced Zorb ball.
(http://blog-imgs-26.fc2.com/b/a/r/barefootgirl/a_zorb-733232.jpg)
Goddamn, I kind of hope so! But I bet that whatever he comes up with will be WAY weirder than anything any of us mere mortals can think up... he IS from Tucson, after all.
Tonight we went to see Mark Growden and hang out with FBF, who is the person who introduced us (she's been trying for over two years to get us together) and then I got to show my T-shirt to Mark Growden, who shook my hand several times. That was rather lovely.
Quote from: The Lord and Lady Omnibus Fuck on June 04, 2010, 11:12:43 AM
Quote from: Cainad on June 03, 2010, 03:38:14 PM
Quote from: Hawk on June 03, 2010, 11:22:21 AM
Now I wonder what is going to happen on teh secks date!
Probably something like being taken up in one of those private low-orbit space flight crafts, then being ejected and making love while falling to Earth in a giant reinforced Zorb ball.
(http://blog-imgs-26.fc2.com/b/a/r/barefootgirl/a_zorb-733232.jpg)
Goddamn, I kind of hope so! But I bet that whatever he comes up with will be WAY weirder than anything any of us mere mortals can think up... he IS from Tucson, after all.
Even other Tucsonans wouldn't be able to guess. It's to do with his Mark of Tucson, nobody's is the same.
I made out with Mario last night.
Strangely, I feel completely fine about it, and it's not at all infringing on the ridiculous amount of time I spend thinking about Salt.
Oh, and Salt asked me and FBF to be his family. :) I am no longer worried about his attachment to psycho ex-girlfriend.
AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW
I have taken inspiration from Mr. Language and decided how I am going to pull off superawesome date, based on the one really cool thing I know there is to do on Long Island:
Girl has expressed interest in skydiving. There are opportunities for beginner skydiving nearby on this island. Problem solved.
Quote from: Cainad on June 06, 2010, 02:27:11 AM
I have taken inspiration from Mr. Language and decided how I am going to pull off superawesome date, based on the one really cool thing I know there is to do on Long Island:
Girl has expressed interest in skydiving. There are opportunities for beginner skydiving nearby on this island. Problem solved.
OHHHH yeah! You're in like Flint!
Quote from: The Lord and Lady Omnibus Fuck on June 06, 2010, 02:49:05 AM
Quote from: Cainad on June 06, 2010, 02:27:11 AM
I have taken inspiration from Mr. Language and decided how I am going to pull off superawesome date, based on the one really cool thing I know there is to do on Long Island:
Girl has expressed interest in skydiving. There are opportunities for beginner skydiving nearby on this island. Problem solved.
OHHHH yeah! You're in like Flint!
I mean, it's something I've wanted to do for a while anyway. Plus it shows that I remembered/meant it when I said we'd go skydiving some day (we were chatting about stuff we'd like to do before we're out of college and she mentioned how none of her friends were down for skydiving, and I was like "hell yes I'll do that with you!").
My love life has definitely taken a stupid turn this morning. Or maybe I'm just being stupid about it. Either way, my phone is turned off and I'm dreading turning it back on.
Whew. Stupidity over! That was an entire day of suck.
Mr. Language and I now have lovey-dovey nicknames for each other; mine is Snowcap (like the lard) and his is Eater of Souls.
I'd really like you to visualize the guy in my avatar as "Snowcap", for full effect.
And then I broke up with him. The end. :(
I miss him a lot already. He really got under my skin. Still, better now than later; the risk wasn't worth it.
Him at the cave we found near Silver Star:
(http://sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-ash2/hs062.ash2/36476_406775314068_710084068_4482928_5804765_n.jpg)
Farewell, Eater of Souls.
Sadly, this is probably the correct motorcycle. Hell you dated for TWO FUCKING MONTHS and he wouldn't touch you.
I'm two states away, and I wanna :fap: :fap: :fap: :fap: :fap:
Lee, Smith,
FAPFAPFAPFAPFAP
I'm really sorry to hear it, Nigel.
But if it was the right decision, it was the right decision. Hope it works out better next time.
We did get it on a week ago, actually, and it was pretty good.
Part of me is thinking, shit, it's just a slow process and I should hang in there and be patient and wait for him to be really ready to move on from his ex-girl. Another part of me thinks that will never happen as long as they stay in touch and that romance is being fed via ongoing communication.
And yet another part of me just hates the word "should".
Quote from: Nigel on June 25, 2010, 08:08:04 AM
We did get it on a week ago, actually, and it was pretty good.
Part of me is thinking, shit, it's just a slow process and I should hang in there and be patient and wait for him to be really ready to move on from his ex-girl. Another part of me thinks that will never happen as long as they stay in touch and that romance is being fed via ongoing communication.
And yet another part of me just hates the word "should".
Well, he might need more time, and maybe you can keep that avenue open, while in the meantime exploring other options?
If you really like him it might be worth keeping that door open for when he's ready to walk through it.
Edit: within a reasonable timeframe, naturally.
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on June 25, 2010, 08:25:09 AM
Quote from: Nigel on June 25, 2010, 08:08:04 AM
We did get it on a week ago, actually, and it was pretty good.
Part of me is thinking, shit, it's just a slow process and I should hang in there and be patient and wait for him to be really ready to move on from his ex-girl. Another part of me thinks that will never happen as long as they stay in touch and that romance is being fed via ongoing communication.
And yet another part of me just hates the word "should".
Well, he might need more time, and maybe you can keep that avenue open, while in the meantime exploring other options?
If you really like him it might be worth keeping that door open for when he's ready to walk through it.
Edit: within a reasonable timeframe, naturally.
I'm not burning any bridges, but I'm also going to assume that he's a lost cause. He's going to be around in the periphery of my life anyway because he knows a lot of my friends, but I won't be talking to him.
If he wanted to be ready, he'd be ready. He doesn't want to get over her, so he won't. That simple. I knew this going in, but I want more from a relationship than he has to offer, so it's time to walk.
Quote from: Nigel on June 25, 2010, 08:39:15 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on June 25, 2010, 08:25:09 AM
Quote from: Nigel on June 25, 2010, 08:08:04 AM
We did get it on a week ago, actually, and it was pretty good.
Part of me is thinking, shit, it's just a slow process and I should hang in there and be patient and wait for him to be really ready to move on from his ex-girl. Another part of me thinks that will never happen as long as they stay in touch and that romance is being fed via ongoing communication.
And yet another part of me just hates the word "should".
Well, he might need more time, and maybe you can keep that avenue open, while in the meantime exploring other options?
If you really like him it might be worth keeping that door open for when he's ready to walk through it.
Edit: within a reasonable timeframe, naturally.
I'm not burning any bridges, but I'm also going to assume that he's a lost cause. He's going to be around in the periphery of my life anyway because he knows a lot of my friends, but I won't be talking to him.
If he wanted to be ready, he'd be ready. He doesn't want to get over her, so he won't. That simple. I knew this going in, but I want more from a relationship than he has to offer, so it's time to walk.
That sucks. Sorry to hear it.
Thanks. It'll be a hell of a lot better in a couple of weeks, and definitely easier than if I waited six months before doing it.
Quote from: Nigel on June 25, 2010, 08:42:31 AM
Thanks. It'll be a hell of a lot better in a couple of weeks, and definitely easier than if I waited six months before doing it.
Yeah, better to cut it off now before it gets real serious.
In the meantime, you know where to find black metal ukelele for any needed lulz :wink:
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on June 25, 2010, 08:49:02 AM
Quote from: Nigel on June 25, 2010, 08:42:31 AM
Thanks. It'll be a hell of a lot better in a couple of weeks, and definitely easier than if I waited six months before doing it.
Yeah, better to cut it off now before it gets real serious.
In the meantime, you know where to find black metal ukelele for any needed lulz :wink:
Laughing at shit on Youtube has saved my sanity many a time!
Quote from: Nigel on June 25, 2010, 08:52:24 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on June 25, 2010, 08:49:02 AM
Quote from: Nigel on June 25, 2010, 08:42:31 AM
Thanks. It'll be a hell of a lot better in a couple of weeks, and definitely easier than if I waited six months before doing it.
Yeah, better to cut it off now before it gets real serious.
In the meantime, you know where to find black metal ukelele for any needed lulz :wink:
Laughing at shit on Youtube has saved my sanity many a time!
I'll dig them up as needed :)
It is possible that me losing my shit and breaking up with Mr. Language was a good thing on more than one level; we are talking again. Not back together, but talking. He has distanced himself from the ex, and is maybe possibly making some progress toward wanting to move on.
I'm not back in until/unless that happens, though. Not expecting anything. But feeling optimistic about whatever friendship/relationship evolves.
That makkes me :)
Goode luck, Nigel.
Thanks. :)
:) :)
So yesterday I found out that the reason I haven't heard from Angelo for a month is because he thought I had a boyfriend. :roll: I set the record straight and we went out for drinks last night... and then came home and tried on corsets. :)
Annnnd tonight Mr. Language is coming over and we are going for a walk and then watching Deadwood and drinking wine and eating blueberry sorbet! Squeeeeee!
Holy fucking shit this guy is going to be sitting right on my couch in about two hours!
(http://sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-ash1/hs526.ash1/30904_454873081257_782581257_6050343_5891253_n.jpg)
yes, he makes me stupid.
:lulz: Nigel is getting it on with Billie Brewer.
Quote from: Iason Ouabache on July 02, 2010, 05:57:38 AM
:lulz: Nigel is getting it on with Billie Brewer.
Now I have to go look up Billie Brewer...
:? I don't get it.
Here is a not-very-flattering picture of both of us:
(http://sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-ash2/hs070.ash2/36839_401993476658_737241658_4605088_1941022_n.jpg)
What is that face I make all the time? I'm making it in about half my pics. It's a face like I put explosive in the cat & everybody's gonna die in a minute.
Quote from: Nigel on July 07, 2010, 09:11:33 PM
Here is a not-very-flattering picture of both of us:
(http://sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-ash2/hs070.ash2/36839_401993476658_737241658_4605088_1941022_n.jpg)
What is that face I make all the time? I'm making it in about half my pics. It's a face like I put explosive in the cat & everybody's gonna die in a minute. And then I'll laugh my ass off.
Fixed.
Quote from: Mistress Freeky, HRN on July 07, 2010, 10:23:52 PM
Quote from: Nigel on July 07, 2010, 09:11:33 PM
Here is a not-very-flattering picture of both of us:
(http://sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-ash2/hs070.ash2/36839_401993476658_737241658_4605088_1941022_n.jpg)
What is that face I make all the time? I'm making it in about half my pics. It's a face like I put explosive in the cat & everybody's gonna die in a minute. And then I'll laugh my ass off.
Fixed.
Yep, that's EXACTLY it. :lulz:
Aw, I disagree--I think it's a sweet picture.
Thanks Jenne! :)
He's on his way over now. I am going to have the hardest time not dropping hints about the Terrible Thing™ Dok is writing him!
Quote from: Nigel on July 08, 2010, 04:50:02 AM
Thanks Jenne! :)
He's on his way over now. I am going to have the hardest time not dropping hints about the Terrible Thing™ Dok is writing him!
NO HINTS! :crankey:
Quote from: Nigel on July 07, 2010, 09:07:15 PM
Quote from: Iason Ouabache on July 02, 2010, 05:57:38 AM
:lulz: Nigel is getting it on with Billie Brewer.
Now I have to go look up Billie Brewer...
:? I don't get it.
It would help if I didn't fuck the name up. It's Bernie Brewer, the mascot for the Milwaukee Brewers. He's in the foreground of that picture smilling away with his awesome blonde mustache.
Quote from: Nigel on July 07, 2010, 09:11:33 PM
What is that face I make all the time? I'm making it in about half my pics. It's a face like I put explosive in the cat & everybody's gonna die in a minute.
You probably know your face better than most people.
It looks sweet like you're amused by something just off camera.
No really, sweet pic overall. So is there a good chance of things working out with this guy? He sounds great.
To sum it up, if you'd put explosives in the cat, and you make this face, you'd totally get away with it.
I did not drop any hints, though he did walk in while I was reading CC and saw some posts by Dok Howl which attracted his attention, and then he wanted to know if Dok Howl was me. I WAS GOOD, I SWEAR! :lulz:
LMNO, Bernie! I wondered what the hell he was talking about. So, his cousin from Wisconsin, who took that picture, carries that thing EVERYWHERE and when I was over there the other night Mr. Language opened a beer "for Bernie". I don't understand what the hell the deal is, but I think it's that he is crazy.
Thanks, Trip. :) I am actually blissfully unaware of what my face is doing 99.8% of the time because I can't see it unless I'm in front of a mirror, but that expression shows up a lot in pictures... my photographer friends tell me I'm extremely difficult to get candid shots of because my face is very mobile and usually doing something terrible. I can't make that particular face if I try.
Things look pretty good for working out with Mr. Language. :)
:lulz:
Nigel takes awesome pictures, especially because her face is usually doing something terrible.
:lulz:
Today Mr. Language said that he would like to spend more time in bed.
I said nothing, but internally I rejoiced.
Quote from: Nigel on July 10, 2010, 06:28:46 AM
Today Mr. Language said that he would like to spend more time in bed.
I said nothing, but internally I rejoiced.
Victory?
Quote from: Mistress Freeky, HRN on July 10, 2010, 05:05:42 PM
Quote from: Nigel on July 10, 2010, 06:28:46 AM
Today Mr. Language said that he would like to spend more time in bed.
I said nothing, but internally I rejoiced.
Victory?
I'm not planting any flags until it happens.
tie him up and rape him.
HROSIE of DOOM demands it
(http://sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/photos-ak-ash1/v63/84/105/500347095/n500347095_32922_5490.jpg)
Quote from: Nigel on July 07, 2010, 11:34:53 PM
Quote from: Mistress Freeky, HRN on July 07, 2010, 10:23:52 PM
Quote from: Nigel on July 07, 2010, 09:11:33 PM
Here is a not-very-flattering picture of both of us:
(http://sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-ash2/hs070.ash2/36839_401993476658_737241658_4605088_1941022_n.jpg)
What is that face I make all the time? I'm making it in about half my pics. It's a face like I put explosive in the cat & everybody's gonna die in a minute. And then I'll laugh my ass off.
Fixed.
Yep, that's EXACTLY it. :lulz:
EIther way you look really happy. I'm going to have to go with Trip on this one, imminently exploding cat or not :)
Thanks! He does make me happy. Most of the time.
Quote from: Nigel on July 13, 2010, 09:22:47 PM
Thanks! He does make me happy. Most of the time.
Let's hope it continues with the happy and not the less-of-the-time :)
You make a cute couple.
:) I'm late.
...to be continued
...no, really, for the record, not only is that smiley sarcastic, but there is no possible reason I could be late other than random hormonal shifts, stress, or immaculate conception. So I'm not worried, I'm just disturbed.
HE HAS SUPER SPERM AND CAN IMPREGNATE WOMEN FROM CROSS THE ROOM!
Quote from: Mistress Freeky, HRN on July 14, 2010, 02:35:14 PM
HE HAS SUPER SPERM AND CAN IMPREGNATE WOMEN FROM CROSS THE ROOM!
:x
I thought that was LMNO, who has to stay at least 2000 miles away from me at all times, because I am one of the most frighteningly fertile women ever to walk the earth. My eggs actually hunt down sperm outside of my body, knock them unconscious, and drag them back to my uterus.
Quote from: Nigel on July 14, 2010, 05:43:02 PM
Quote from: Mistress Freeky, HRN on July 14, 2010, 02:35:14 PM
HE HAS SUPER SPERM AND CAN IMPREGNATE WOMEN FROM CROSS THE ROOM!
:x
I thought that was LMNO, who has to stay at least 2000 miles away from me at all times, because I am one of the most frighteningly fertile women ever to walk the earth. My eggs actually hunt down sperm outside of my body, knock them unconscious, and drag them back to my uterus.
:lulz: You're fucked.
If only it were that easy.
Quote from: Mistress Freeky, HRN on July 14, 2010, 05:44:06 PM
Quote from: Nigel on July 14, 2010, 05:43:02 PM
Quote from: Mistress Freeky, HRN on July 14, 2010, 02:35:14 PM
HE HAS SUPER SPERM AND CAN IMPREGNATE WOMEN FROM CROSS THE ROOM!
:x
I thought that was LMNO, who has to stay at least 2000 miles away from me at all times, because I am one of the most frighteningly fertile women ever to walk the earth. My eggs actually hunt down sperm outside of my body, knock them unconscious, and drag them back to my uterus.
:lulz: You're fucked.
Actually, I'm not, which is why I'm not worried about being pregnant. :(
And now I'm managed to upset him, and in doing so upset myself and I'm distracted from work and haven't gotten ANYTHING done yet today, not even my morning run.
GREAT.
I can tell this is going to be a bang-up day.
Quote from: Nigel on July 14, 2010, 07:40:58 PM
And now I'm managed to upset him, and in doing so upset myself and I'm distracted from work and haven't gotten ANYTHING done yet today, not even my morning run.
GREAT.
I can tell this is going to be a bang-up day.
1. Go for a walk.
2. Take a few obnoxious pics of the area and send them to me.
3. Get back to work.
Listen to the Doktor.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on July 14, 2010, 07:42:07 PM
Quote from: Nigel on July 14, 2010, 07:40:58 PM
And now I'm managed to upset him, and in doing so upset myself and I'm distracted from work and haven't gotten ANYTHING done yet today, not even my morning run.
GREAT.
I can tell this is going to be a bang-up day.
1. Go for a walk.
2. Take a few obnoxious pics of the area and send them to me.
3. Get back to work.
Listen to the Doktor.
Thy will be done... back in a few. :)
I am currently furious. Furious. I cannot talk about it because I am so absolutely furious. But here are the pictures I took on my walk:
(http://sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc4/hs068.snc4/34745_411897609068_710084068_4604187_3835916_n.jpg)
(http://sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc4/hs076.snc4/35179_411897889068_710084068_4604189_1448581_n.jpg)
(http://sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc4/hs167.snc4/37697_411907219068_710084068_4604477_8198609_n.jpg)
(http://sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-ash2/hs030.ash2/34867_411907514068_710084068_4604483_1177563_n.jpg)
(http://sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc4/hs185.snc4/37565_411907909068_710084068_4604489_3096774_n.jpg)
(http://sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc4/hs179.snc4/38296_411910694068_710084068_4604567_4402223_n.jpg)
(http://sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc4/hs190.snc4/37816_411912519068_710084068_4604626_4337644_n.jpg)
(http://sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-ash2/hs025.ash2/34590_411914294068_710084068_4604688_6576971_n.jpg)
Good pics.
Damn, I can see the line of tension running through your jaw and down your neck......
:x
Nigel's hot when she's pissed.
Of course, I have no survival instincts whatsoever.
Pics saved and are going into the horrible pics file for later hilarity. Nigel's pic excepted.
(http://sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc4/hs185.snc4/37565_411907909068_710084068_4604489_3096774_n.jpg)
Waugh! :scared:
I know exactly one other person who can glare like that. That glare + Hand of Eris? Pretty sure that's legally considered a deadly weapon in most states.
snort
HERE YOU GO, GIRLFRIEND
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iGJgyuAu6eo
Quote from: E.O.T. on July 15, 2010, 01:56:55 AM
HERE YOU GO, GIRLFRIEND
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iGJgyuAu6eo
Oh my god, that was awesome!
So, for mutually-agreed-upon reasons far too complicated to even go into, it is my turn to frustrate Mr. Language.
I'm still frustrated, but at least this is slightly more fun for me. :evil:
I can't even fathom why you would voluntarily torture yourself, but I hope you have fun doing it. :horrormirth: Or something
It's not like I don't have the other boys.
He hates holding still and posing, so I made him hold still and pose:
(http://sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-ash2/hs100.ash2/38314_414269884068_710084068_4665432_943468_n.jpg)
:lol:
He looks happy to oblige.
He's quite the looker!
Isn't he HOT?
I think he likes doing things I ask of him after telling me that he doesn't like to do them.
Funny, I never realized it but I do the same thing! :?
ETA we need an emoticon like above, but smiling.
Quote from: Sigmatic on July 22, 2010, 12:03:08 AM
Funny, I never realized it but I do the same thing! :?
ETA we need an emoticon like above, but smiling.
Haha! Yes, we do!
Weirdly, I think a lot of people like that... it's a sort of gift. "I don't like doing this thing, but doing it for you pleases me because it is a way for me to show you how high my esteem is for you" or somesuch.
I don't really know if I do it because I'm nice, but it reminds me of EoC's sig: Doesn't have to be fun to be fun. :)
I found this 28-year-old surfer 12 blocks away. Nom nom nom! Also Mario's been messaging me a lot. Distractions!
I'm in love! :argh!: :lulz: :eek: :? :x :fap:
Quote from: Nigel on July 29, 2010, 01:11:25 AM
I'm in love! :argh!: :lulz: :eek: :? :x :fap:
Oh, boy.
That can stick to your face, you know.
(Congratulations)
Quote from: Doktor Howl on July 29, 2010, 01:12:34 AM
Quote from: Nigel on July 29, 2010, 01:11:25 AM
I'm in love! :argh!: :lulz: :eek: :? :x :fap:
Oh, boy.
That can stick to your face, you know.
(Congratulations)
:lol: Oh boy, howdy, I know!
I still don't know where it will go, but it seems to be good, and he seems to be a pretty great person. He says "It's just possible that I might not break your heart, you know."
:lulz:
We'll see.
Quote from: Nigel on July 29, 2010, 01:15:45 AM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on July 29, 2010, 01:12:34 AM
Quote from: Nigel on July 29, 2010, 01:11:25 AM
I'm in love! :argh!: :lulz: :eek: :? :x :fap:
Oh, boy.
That can stick to your face, you know.
(Congratulations)
:lol: Oh boy, howdy, I know!
I still don't know where it will go, but it seems to be good, and he seems to be a pretty great person. He says "It's just possible that I might not break your heart, you know."
:lulz:
We'll see.
I really hope this works out for you, after the last 2 years of awful shit.
Congratulations, Nigel! He sounds like a great guy. :)
Quote from: Doktor Howl on July 29, 2010, 01:16:37 AM
Quote from: Nigel on July 29, 2010, 01:15:45 AM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on July 29, 2010, 01:12:34 AM
Quote from: Nigel on July 29, 2010, 01:11:25 AM
I'm in love! :argh!: :lulz: :eek: :? :x :fap:
Oh, boy.
That can stick to your face, you know.
(Congratulations)
:lol: Oh boy, howdy, I know!
I still don't know where it will go, but it seems to be good, and he seems to be a pretty great person. He says "It's just possible that I might not break your heart, you know."
:lulz:
We'll see.
I really hope this works out for you, after the last 2 years of awful shit.
Thanks... goddamn, so do I!
Quote from: Aucoq on July 29, 2010, 01:18:15 AM
Congratulations, Nigel! He sounds like a great guy. :)
Thanks, strange chicken guy!
Quote from: Nigel on July 29, 2010, 01:19:15 AM
Thanks, strange chicken guy!
Strange Chicken Guy. I love it. :lol:
HOOOOORRAAAAAAAAYYYYY FOR NIIIIIIIGEEEEEELLLLLL!!!!!!!
[/shadow][/glow]
There is a 50/50 chance this will not end in tears.
I'm rooting for you two.
Quote from: Doktor Alphapance on July 29, 2010, 03:52:53 PM
There is a 50/50 chance this will not end in tears.
I'm rooting for you two.
Thanks! :lol:
Mario called me today. It is possible that he just wanted to talk and reconnect, especially since he had a really difficult trip to Florida and, as much as E.O.T. is my comfort object, I'm Mario's comfort object. However, if what he wants is to get into my pants, I am fairly certain that my reaction will be along the lines of "YAY!" followed by rapid clothing removal.
This is fine with Eater of Souls, but I am less sure whether it's a good idea in terms of my emotional connection with him, because I loved Mario once and could probably love him again, and if he was the guy with the sex, it's pretty easy to see how that might distract me from Eater of Souls.
Also, Mario and I have amazing chemistry and he is the best lay I have ever experienced, by orders of magnitude. The guy is epic.
Perhaps you should refrain from fucking guys who aren't necessarily the guy you're currently in love with.
I know, I'm an old-fashioned curmudgeon.
Quote from: Doktor Alphapance on July 30, 2010, 01:34:39 PM
Perhaps you should refrain from fucking guys who aren't necessarily the guy you're currently in love with.
I know, I'm an old-fashioned curmudgeon.
You think I should be monogamous? :? Why? Do you think everyone should be monogamous, or just me?
Well, in the most pragmatic and clinical sense, I have personally found that it exponentially complicates relationships.
As far as I have observed, your relationships are already fairly complicated. It seems excessive to further complicate what you and Mr Language may or may not have.
Non-monogamy is a perfectly valid existence. I have not moral qualms about it. I'm just proposing that it may make things simpler if, for now, you focus all your energies on Mr Language.
If monogamy doesn't suit you, and Mr Language is on board, then get your monkey on.
But shoving your head in a known meatgrinder is another thing entirely.
Just saying.
Since I'm not currently fucking the guy I am in love with, and I have a fairly strong sex drive, keeping my energies focused there is not working all that well for me. However, like I've already said, Mario is probably the absolutely worst outlet for that... albeit, the hottest. :fap:
But I've made my decision and will be talking to Eater of Souls about it soon.
I did some textification with EoS... I really need to talk to him in person, but I kind of clued him into where I'm at. I think everything will be fine; he just needs a little incentive to step to. Not that it is my intention (nor am I the instigator!) but maybe the threat of Mario moving in on me is the incentive that I couldn't provide on my own.
PANTS FALL
EVERYONE ORGIES
I never updated this, but as it happens, whether it was the threat of Mario or just coincidental timing, I got so fucking laid that night. And I've been pretty damn happy ever since! :mrgreen:
Quote from: Nigel on August 08, 2010, 01:15:02 AM
I got so fucking laid that night.
and the peanut gallery goes wild!
HUZZAH!!
So like, shit is awesome, and stuff.
Mr. Language and I have been boyfriend and girlfriend for nine whole days, and we had our first fight on Saturday, four months and four days after our first date. :D We were so excited that we wrote it on the calendar.
He says I'm the easiest and most reasonable girlfriend he's ever had, which makes me wonder what kind of psychotic freaks he normally dates? I mean, whoa. Also, he tries to take care of me. I barely remember the last time anyone tried to take care of me! OK, actually I do totally remember, it was one time I was sick and puking my brains out and E.O.T. fed me soup and tea and tucked me into bed. So, this is pretty fucking nice.
This thread is now probably only useful for nauseating comments about how adorable he is and how cute we are together, so I will try to minimize its use. :)
Oh, and the sex ROCKS. :mrgreen:
YAY NIGEL! :D
It is good to see Nigel happy. It's about time.
Huh. if I ever "nicely" tucked you in, it's probably because I was stealing your Oxycoton or sumething. This guy must be a chump! Wait till he and i are fighting over who's is best soup!! HA! YeaAAAh! HAA! No Dong HAHH!!
Quote from: E.O.T. on August 28, 2010, 08:57:02 AM
Huh. if I ever "nicely" tucked you in, it's probably because I was stealing your Oxycoton or sumething. This guy must be a chump! Wait till he and i are fighting over who's is best soup!! HA! YeaAAAh! HAA! No Dong HAHH!!
You were really sweet, and kissed my forehead. So there.
...dam(n)mit!!
So, this morning was perfectly lovely and Mr. Language and I were talking about going to Mexico and Germany in the next two years, and then conversation meandered to the subject of people just disappearing, and I asked whether and how I would find out if something happened to him and he ended up in the hospital, and suddenly he turned into a TOTAL DICK and was all, "That's just how it is, that's how it's always been, I'm a lone wolf; I just drift from girlfriend to girlfriend. I'm two years older than you and I've always been OK, don't worry about me"
WHAT THE FUCK
I just wanted to know if his emergency contacts would call me if something happened. I didn't know that level of inquiry into the logistics of his personal life would turn him into a raging douche. I could tell that it was partly tongue-in-cheek, but what the fuck. Now I'm wondering if this relationship's days are numbered. I'm only willing to take it as seriously as he does, and fuck me if that wasn't a reasonable question if we're taking it seriously.
:( Did you say something to him?
Actually, he showed up here RIGHT AS I WAS POSTING THIS and I told him that I was unhappy about this morning and that he had been kind of a dick, and he apologized and filled out an emergency contact card with my name on it and put it in his wallet. Problem solved! :)
YAY!
Quote from: The Lord and Lady Omnibus Fuck on October 07, 2010, 09:26:11 PM
Actually, he showed up here RIGHT AS I WAS POSTING THIS and I told him that I was unhappy about this morning and that he had been kind of a dick, and he apologized and filled out an emergency contact card with my name on it and put it in his wallet. Problem solved! :)
You should still show him the WRATH.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on October 07, 2010, 09:44:18 PM
Quote from: The Lord and Lady Omnibus Fuck on October 07, 2010, 09:26:11 PM
Actually, he showed up here RIGHT AS I WAS POSTING THIS and I told him that I was unhappy about this morning and that he had been kind of a dick, and he apologized and filled out an emergency contact card with my name on it and put it in his wallet. Problem solved! :)
You should still show him the WRATH.
I will, and
it's going to leave marks.
Quote from: The Lord and Lady Omnibus Fuck on October 08, 2010, 01:16:33 AM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on October 07, 2010, 09:44:18 PM
Quote from: The Lord and Lady Omnibus Fuck on October 07, 2010, 09:26:11 PM
Actually, he showed up here RIGHT AS I WAS POSTING THIS and I told him that I was unhappy about this morning and that he had been kind of a dick, and he apologized and filled out an emergency contact card with my name on it and put it in his wallet. Problem solved! :)
You should still show him the WRATH.
I will, and it's going to leave marks.
Lucky bastard.
Quote from: The Lord and Lady Omnibus Fuck on October 07, 2010, 09:26:11 PM
Actually, he showed up here RIGHT AS I WAS POSTING THIS and I told him that I was unhappy about this morning and that he had been kind of a dick, and he apologized and filled out an emergency contact card with my name on it and put it in his wallet. Problem solved! :)
Isn't it wonderful when they do that after being a total dick? :)
Quote from: BLARFINGARF on October 08, 2010, 05:56:16 AM
Quote from: The Lord and Lady Omnibus Fuck on October 07, 2010, 09:26:11 PM
Actually, he showed up here RIGHT AS I WAS POSTING THIS and I told him that I was unhappy about this morning and that he had been kind of a dick, and he apologized and filled out an emergency contact card with my name on it and put it in his wallet. Problem solved! :)
Isn't it wonderful when they do that after being a total dick? :)
I'm rather proud of myself for having the ability to apologize for being a dick within 1 hour of committing dickery. I like to think of it as a skill that comes with practice.
I APOLOGIZE
with a "...but" clause, therefore never ceasing to be a dick.
Quote from: E.O.T. on October 12, 2010, 05:45:04 AM
I APOLOGIZE
with a "...but" clause, therefore never ceasing to be a dick.
I found that if I refuse to look at or talk to you, you eventually make a proper apology.
Holy crap... AGOD4U messaged me again.
Quote
I like things I make with my hands
but nearly as much as my inspirations
much http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L9tgb1e2evQ
OH MY GOD, DUDE. JUST... NO.
Quote from: The Lord and Lady Omnibus Fuck on October 15, 2010, 10:13:29 PM
Holy crap... AGOD4U messaged me again.
Quote
I like things I make with my hands
but nearly as much as my inspirations
much http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L9tgb1e2evQ
OH MY GOD, DUDE. JUST... NO.
What the hell does that even mean?
I don't know, but the video is of ugly carved rock fountains of naked women, from which I take that he's a sculptor. A terrible sculptor.
also this doesn't really belong in this thread but I forgot where the OK Cupid fun thread went.
Hahaha.
Actually, at first I thought the second one was Cthulu looking, and then it was CTHULU PENIS OMG AWESOME, and then I realized Oh. It's just a naked woman. :|
Quote from: Mistress Freeky, HRN on October 15, 2010, 11:56:28 PM
Hahaha.
Actually, at first I thought the second one was Cthulu looking, and then it was CTHULU PENIS OMG AWESOME, and then I realized Oh. It's just a naked woman. :|
THIS
It looks like she's waterboarding herself because of the water coming out of her mouth...
...and her nipples... :|
eta:
the first one doesn't even look like anything, and WHY are they all bending over backwards (hurts my back just looking at it), and it's obvious he's never seen a naked woman irl before (much less had sex with one) because of how deformed these women all are.
Quote from: BLARFINGARF on October 16, 2010, 05:09:21 PM
Quote from: Mistress Freeky, HRN on October 15, 2010, 11:56:28 PM
Hahaha.
Actually, at first I thought the second one was Cthulu looking, and then it was CTHULU PENIS OMG AWESOME, and then I realized Oh. It's just a naked woman. :|
THIS
It looks like she's waterboarding herself because of the water coming out of her mouth...
...and her nipples... :|
eta:
the first one doesn't even look like anything, and WHY are they all bending over backwards (hurts my back just looking at it), and it's obvious he's never seen a naked woman irl before (much less had sex with one) because of how deformed these women all are.
It's really all explained by the fact that he is a TERRIBLE SCULPTOR. I can't help wondering if he's maybe a little brain-damaged or just mildly retarded.
the sad thing is that he probably sells that shit like its made of gold and dildos.
Quote from: BLARFINGARF on October 16, 2010, 09:38:29 PM
the sad thing is that he probably sells that shit like its made of gold and dildos.
:x The market is supposed to destroy mediocrity, but instead it encourages it.
The fact he calls them goddess fountains suggests to me that he is marketing to pagans. The fact that something marketed to pagans looks rather like a woman being coerced by the inquisition into confessing to witchcraft amuses me to no end.
Quote from: The Lord and Lady Omnibus Fuck on October 17, 2010, 12:37:59 AM
Quote from: BLARFINGARF on October 16, 2010, 09:38:29 PM
the sad thing is that he probably sells that shit like its made of gold and dildos.
:x The market is supposed to destroy mediocrity, but instead it encourages it.
ayup.
hey if you ever really end up travelling to Germany, be sure to let me know. cause if you're in the proper region of Germany, I could totally stop by (especially Cologne, cause my gf's parents live there). (on the other hand, I would suggest you go to BERLIN because IT FUCKING ROCKS and I'm sure you'd love it too. except Berlin is really too far away from here for me to randomly stop by--but let me know anyway cause we went there and I can give tips on fun things to see/do/drink/eat)
Quote from: Triple Zero on October 19, 2010, 09:55:40 AM
hey if you ever really end up travelling to Germany, be sure to let me know. cause if you're in the proper region of Germany, I could totally stop by (especially Cologne, cause my gf's parents live there). (on the other hand, I would suggest you go to BERLIN because IT FUCKING ROCKS and I'm sure you'd love it too. except Berlin is really too far away from here for me to randomly stop by--but let me know anyway cause we went there and I can give tips on fun things to see/do/drink/eat)
That would be SUPER COOL! I will most likely be staying in Lauscha, and I plan to be there for about a month. Probably not 2011, but maybe 2012.
hmm (looking up) 652km (405mi) that's about twice the distance to Cologne :( but then, 2012 is far away (I have to be at a Mexican Maya temple in that year too) so who knows! :)
also, afaik, Verbatim is (often) in, or near, Leipzig, which is much closer.
I miss my Verb :cry:
Quote from: Triple Zero on October 20, 2010, 02:55:23 PM
hmm (looking up) 652km (405mi) that's about twice the distance to Cologne :( but then, 2012 is far away (I have to be at a Mexican Maya temple in that year too) so who knows! :)
also, afaik, Verbatim is (often) in, or near, Leipzig, which is much closer.
I will probably have some opportunity to travel, and 405 miles doesn't sound very far to me... though of course, it depends on the roads and available transportation. The artist in residence at Lauscha glass factory has offered me a guest artist spot, which I would very much like to take. If it goes well, I'll probably return for a month or two here and there.
Not far? Hm, I suppose it's maybe Americans are more used to travelling long distances by car then, lots of empty space, after all? [my gf concurs--when she was travelling in China perception gets different when everything is farther apart]
Cologne is 300km (188mi), and that's 3.5 hours to travel, even though you can go very fast on the German Autobahns (how fast mostly depends on what your car can safely perform, we often go 100-110 mph on the quiet parts).
Or maybe it's got something to do with the prices of gasoline over here:
http://www.google.com/search?q=1.45+euros+per+liter+in+dollar+per+gallon
(for fuel efficiency, my gf's car does http://www.google.com/search?q=8+liter+per+100km+in+gallons+per+100+mile)
aaaanyway I'm sure we can work something out when the time comes :)
Quote from: Triple Zero on October 20, 2010, 09:33:39 PM
Not far? Hm, I suppose it's maybe Americans are more used to travelling long distances by car then, lots of empty space, after all? [my gf concurs--when she was travelling in China perception gets different when everything is farther apart]
Cologne is 300km (188mi), and that's 3.5 hours to travel, even though you can go very fast on the German Autobahns (how fast mostly depends on what your car can safely perform, we often go 100-110 mph on the quiet parts).
Or maybe it's got something to do with the prices of gasoline over here:
http://www.google.com/search?q=1.45+euros+per+liter+in+dollar+per+gallon
(for fuel efficiency, my gf's car does http://www.google.com/search?q=8+liter+per+100km+in+gallons+per+100+mile)
aaaanyway I'm sure we can work something out when the time comes :)
Your gas is very expensive, and I likely won't have a car. I am not unused to weekend trips to Arcata or Victoria; it's about 300 miles to Victoria and 500 miles to Arcata, but faster to go to Arcata because you don't have to take a ferry.
I'm sure that something will work out! :)