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ITT: The New American Dream

Started by Cramulus, August 31, 2011, 06:38:17 PM

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Cramulus

#15
August 31, 2011, 06:55:56 PM
To give all my money to an rich white guy who "earned" it by virtue of having a rich white guy for a dad.

That's my American dream.

Eater of Clowns

#16
August 31, 2011, 06:56:26 PM
To eat some salmonella contaminated vegetable and puke my way through a lawsuit to a big payday.

That's my American dream.
Quote from: Pippa Twiddleton on December 22, 2012, 01:06:36 AM
EoC, you are the bane of my existence.

Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on March 07, 2014, 01:18:23 AM
EoC doesn't make creepy.

EoC makes creepy worse.

Quote
the afflicted persons get hold of and consume carrots even in socially quite unacceptable situations.

Cramulus

#17
August 31, 2011, 06:58:12 PM
I want to be shot out of a burrito-shaped cannon into a swimming pool full of undocumented immigrants.

That's my American dream.

Doktor Howl

#18
August 31, 2011, 06:58:58 PM
To wear my heathen neighbor's skin as a cape and dance around the hibachi while reciting from the book of psalms.

That's my American dream.

Molon Lube

Cramulus

#19
August 31, 2011, 07:00:36 PM
I want to make a Rorschach ink blot from blood that came from my ass, discover that it looks like Jesus, and then spend the next thirty years following its commands that only I can hear.

That's my American dream.

Eater of Clowns

#20
August 31, 2011, 07:01:32 PM
I want to cash in on Cramulus' ass blood Rorschach Jesus by acting as his manager.

That's my American dream.

Quote from: Pippa Twiddleton on December 22, 2012, 01:06:36 AM
EoC, you are the bane of my existence.

Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on March 07, 2014, 01:18:23 AM
EoC doesn't make creepy.

EoC makes creepy worse.

Quote
the afflicted persons get hold of and consume carrots even in socially quite unacceptable situations.

Cramulus

#21
August 31, 2011, 07:02:04 PM
I want to sing the National Anthem to fish.

That's my American dream.

Luna

#22
August 31, 2011, 07:02:39 PM
To, some day, have the cash to buy my very own Senator.

That's my American dream.
Death-dealing hormone freak of deliciousness
Pagan-Stomping Valkyrie of the Interbutts™
Rampaging Slayer of Shit-Fountain Habitues

"My father says that almost the whole world is asleep. Everybody you know, everybody you see, everybody you talk to. He says that only a few people are awake, and they live in a state of constant, total amazement."

Quote from: The Payne on November 16, 2011, 07:08:55 PM
If Luna was a furry, she'd sex humans and scream "BEASTIALITY!" at the top of her lungs at inopportune times.

Quote from: Nigel on March 24, 2011, 01:54:48 AM
I like the Luna one. She is a good one.

Quote
"Stop talking to yourself.  You don't like you any better than anyone else who knows you."

Adios

#23
August 31, 2011, 07:02:56 PM
I want to force my religious morals on every single person in the country.

That's my American dream.


Doktor Howl

#24
August 31, 2011, 07:03:05 PM
I want to make the wearing of anything other than woad a felony.

That's my American dream.


Molon Lube

Salty

#25
August 31, 2011, 07:05:23 PM
To buy the entire contents of a Costco Wholesaler, put it in a big heap and set it on fire in front of homeless people so they'll learn what they too can accomplish if they put their minds to it.

That's my American dream.
The world is a car and you're the crash test dummy.

Eater of Clowns

#26
August 31, 2011, 07:07:19 PM
I want to start a BDSM themed eco-village and set up subscription based webcams in the composting toilets.


That's my American dream.

Quote from: Pippa Twiddleton on December 22, 2012, 01:06:36 AM
EoC, you are the bane of my existence.

Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on March 07, 2014, 01:18:23 AM
EoC doesn't make creepy.

EoC makes creepy worse.

Quote
the afflicted persons get hold of and consume carrots even in socially quite unacceptable situations.

Luna

#27
August 31, 2011, 07:08:35 PM
To impliment a weight limit on spandex.

That's my American dream.

(What just walked by my office window...  I want to poke my eyes out with a pen...)
Death-dealing hormone freak of deliciousness
Pagan-Stomping Valkyrie of the Interbutts™
Rampaging Slayer of Shit-Fountain Habitues

"My father says that almost the whole world is asleep. Everybody you know, everybody you see, everybody you talk to. He says that only a few people are awake, and they live in a state of constant, total amazement."

Quote from: The Payne on November 16, 2011, 07:08:55 PM
If Luna was a furry, she'd sex humans and scream "BEASTIALITY!" at the top of her lungs at inopportune times.

Quote from: Nigel on March 24, 2011, 01:54:48 AM
I like the Luna one. She is a good one.

Quote
"Stop talking to yourself.  You don't like you any better than anyone else who knows you."

Fractalbeard

#28
August 31, 2011, 07:12:56 PM
Quote from: Cramulus on August 31, 2011, 07:00:36 PM
I want to make a Rorschach ink blot from blood that came from my ass, discover that it looks like Jesus, and then spend the next thirty years following its commands that only I can hear.

That's my American dream.


Not to hijack, but you reminded me of this: (PROBABLY NSFW)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q824g9dBlQk
Any technology distinguishable from magic is insuficiently advanced.

Triple Zero

#29
August 31, 2011, 07:46:16 PM
I want to sell holy blessed anus-blenders to cash in on Cram's newfound religion.

That's my American dream.
Ex-Soviet Bloc Sexual Attack Swede of Tomorrow™
e-prime disclaimer: let it seem fairly unclear I understand the apparent subjectivity of the above statements. maybe.

INFORMATION SO POWERFUL, YOU ACTUALLY NEED LESS.
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