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ITT: TGRR helps you with your personals ads.

Started by The Good Reverend Roger, November 08, 2011, 06:09:42 PM

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Juana

#255
November 15, 2011, 02:05:06 AM
Did! He wanted to hang out tonight, but I unfortunately can't, so I offered a weekend hang out instead. Haven't heard back yet, though.
"I dispose of obsolete meat machines.  Not because I hate them (I do) and not because they deserve it (they do), but because they are in the way and those older ones don't meet emissions codes.  They emit too much.  You don't like them and I don't like them, so spare me the hysteria."

Pæs

#256
November 15, 2011, 03:46:22 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on November 14, 2011, 05:03:22 PM
Quote from: Beardman Meow on November 12, 2011, 09:33:01 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on November 09, 2011, 06:42:53 PM
If you need more, I can rip off another Joe Walsh song.
I AM HAVING TROUBLE PULLING FREAKS WITH THIS.

CAN I REROLL MY CHARACTER?

Okay.

Are we filling out a form, or just putting up a regular ad?

Same form as Nigel's.  :D

Freeky

#257
November 15, 2011, 04:08:26 AM
Quote from: Secret Agent GARBO on November 15, 2011, 02:05:06 AM
Did! He wanted to hang out tonight, but I unfortunately can't, so I offered a weekend hang out instead. Haven't heard back yet, though.

Oh, man, chicka, I'm hoping for you! 

Juana

#258
November 15, 2011, 04:29:53 AM Last Edit: November 15, 2011, 05:17:09 AM by Secret Agent GARBO
Replying to him right now. :D

Edit: and he's showing the first signs of disenchantment with the city already (do I tell him EVERYONE will ask him why he picked here? And he's from LA - he should know why no one wants to work here!). Maybe SCIENCE! sooner than I thought...
"I dispose of obsolete meat machines.  Not because I hate them (I do) and not because they deserve it (they do), but because they are in the way and those older ones don't meet emissions codes.  They emit too much.  You don't like them and I don't like them, so spare me the hysteria."

ShoeEars

#259
November 15, 2011, 04:35:47 PM
I saw what you did with HoverCats ad, it's fucking fantastic.
Can you make me an ad, I feel like having some fun.
*Brohoof*  /)(\

‎"Every atom in your body came from a star that exploded.
And all the atoms in your left hand probably came from a different star than your right hand.
It really is the most poetic thing I know about physics: You are all stardust."
-- Lawrence Krauss

BabylonHoruv

#260
November 15, 2011, 07:01:22 PM
Quote from: Secret Agent GARBO on November 13, 2011, 09:56:03 PM
Lulz, YES. On my real account (which very specifically says "not looking for dating/sex), I just got a message from a fifty one year old man asking to be my sugar daddy.

Could always go the financial domination route and tell him he is free to buy you presents and in exchance you'll say "thank you daddy" and smile, but he is not to expect anything more than that, including any more of your time than it takes to pick out what he is buying you.
You're a special case, Babylon.  You are offensive even when you don't post.

Merely by being alive, you make everyone just a little more miserable

-Dok Howl

EK WAFFLR

#261
November 16, 2011, 12:25:01 AM
Ok. I want one.
"At first I lifted weights.  But then I asked myself, 'why not people?'  Now everyone runs for the fjord when they see me."


Horribly Oscillating Assbasket of Deliciousness
[/b]

Juana

#262
November 16, 2011, 12:30:57 AM
Quote from: BabylonHoruv on November 15, 2011, 07:01:22 PM
Quote from: Secret Agent GARBO on November 13, 2011, 09:56:03 PM
Lulz, YES. On my real account (which very specifically says "not looking for dating/sex), I just got a message from a fifty one year old man asking to be my sugar daddy.

Could always go the financial domination route and tell him he is free to buy you presents and in exchance you'll say "thank you daddy" and smile, but he is not to expect anything more than that, including any more of your time than it takes to pick out what he is buying you.
I was going to raise demands higher and higher with every message, but he's not responded back to the first one.
"I dispose of obsolete meat machines.  Not because I hate them (I do) and not because they deserve it (they do), but because they are in the way and those older ones don't meet emissions codes.  They emit too much.  You don't like them and I don't like them, so spare me the hysteria."

The Good Reverend Roger

#263
November 16, 2011, 12:37:55 AM
Quote from: ShoeEars on November 15, 2011, 04:35:47 PM
I saw what you did with HoverCats ad, it's fucking fantastic.
Can you make me an ad, I feel like having some fun.

Okay, Check in tomorrow.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

The Good Reverend Roger

#264
November 16, 2011, 07:47:53 PM
Quote from: ShoeEars on November 15, 2011, 04:35:47 PM
I saw what you did with HoverCats ad, it's fucking fantastic.
Can you make me an ad, I feel like having some fun.

QuoteFresno Girl Looking For Steady Abuse Monkey

Let's face it, guys...I hate you all, and you know it.  Yet some of you insist on hitting on me anyway, which tells me that you're a pack of masochists.  It occurs to me that we can make this work...You dote on me, and I will shit on you.  Not literally, mind you, so you scat freaks can just fuck off right now.  No, I mean I will treat you like you obviously want to be treated, because none of you seem to either a) understand how to talk to a woman like she's a human being, or b) think you have what it takes to date someone who doesn't weigh 300 pounds and look like she's slept under a bridge.

Just so you know, I am NOT here to address your mommy issues, or your feelings of inadequacy.  I AM here, however, to dump on you BECAUSE of those issues, rather than IN SPITE of them.

Ever wonder why so many women hate men?  It's because we've never met one.

Get the hell off of my planet, you useless retards.  Christ, I hate you all.  Drink arsenic.

Serious inquiries only.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Juana

#265
November 16, 2011, 07:49:46 PM
:lulz: :lulz: :lulz: YES
"I dispose of obsolete meat machines.  Not because I hate them (I do) and not because they deserve it (they do), but because they are in the way and those older ones don't meet emissions codes.  They emit too much.  You don't like them and I don't like them, so spare me the hysteria."

The Good Reverend Roger

#266
November 16, 2011, 07:55:47 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on November 16, 2011, 12:25:01 AM
Ok. I want one.

QuoteNORWAY - Cuban Superman Seeks Gullible Woman For Obvious Reasons

30s/M/Not Picky - I am an Albino Cuban, currently living in Oslo.  Every woman wants a Cuban, admit it...We're like weasels on speed in bed, and we have no other purpose in life, so there's no hassles in between bouts of frenzied bed-wrecking.  That's right, it's like having a boyfriend, except without the relationship hassles.  I realize this objectifies me, and makes me into something like an appliance, but I'm comfortable with that.

My perfect woman would be a) female and b) female.  I don't care if you're a mess of bad wiring and substance abuse issues, as I honestly have no opinions outside of the sack.  It's almost like I cease existing when the lights are on.  Isn't this what you've always dreamed of?  Of course it is.  Reply today.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

#267
November 16, 2011, 07:59:02 PM
That is BEAUTIFUL.  :lulz:
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."

The Good Reverend Roger

#268
November 16, 2011, 08:08:05 PM
Quote from: Beardman Meow on November 15, 2011, 03:46:22 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on November 14, 2011, 05:03:22 PM
Quote from: Beardman Meow on November 12, 2011, 09:33:01 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on November 09, 2011, 06:42:53 PM
If you need more, I can rip off another Joe Walsh song.
I AM HAVING TROUBLE PULLING FREAKS WITH THIS.

CAN I REROLL MY CHARACTER?

Okay.

Are we filling out a form, or just putting up a regular ad?

Same form as Nigel's.  :D

Okay, here goes.

QuoteMy self-summary 20s/M/Straight/Single/looking

What I'm doing with my life Collecting Bay City Rollers albums and converting them to digital.  No, seriously.  This is the sort of shit I do for a living.  FML.  

I'm really good at Backrubs, cooking, and playing whack-a-mole with the rats in my apartment.  

The first things people usually notice about me rat stains on the shins of my jeans, my nice smile, and my missing right ear.  I'm kind of sensitive about that last one, so please don't stare.  It happened in Tampico, and I really don't want to talk about it.

Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food How to Win Friends and Influence People, The Power of Positive Thinking, anything by Albert Camus (I still get chills up my spine when I watch the film adaptation of My Dinner With Andre).

The six things I could never do without pulse, respiration, hormone balance, electrolytes, food, water, and sleep.

I spend a lot of time thinking about Why I am still single.  This is an utter mystery to me.

On a typical Friday night I am in my apartment, making sure the upside down people don't steal my stuff.

The most private thing I'm willing to admit sometimes I get all fucked up on diarrhea medication.

You should message me if you have no common sense.

" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Anna Mae Bollocks

#269
November 16, 2011, 08:25:14 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on November 16, 2011, 07:47:53 PM
Quote from: ShoeEars on November 15, 2011, 04:35:47 PM
I saw what you did with HoverCats ad, it's fucking fantastic.
Can you make me an ad, I feel like having some fun.

QuoteFresno Girl Looking For Steady Abuse Monkey

Let's face it, guys...I hate you all, and you know it.  Yet some of you insist on hitting on me anyway, which tells me that you're a pack of masochists.  It occurs to me that we can make this work...You dote on me, and I will shit on you.  Not literally, mind you, so you scat freaks can just fuck off right now.  No, I mean I will treat you like you obviously want to be treated, because none of you seem to either a) understand how to talk to a woman like she's a human being, or b) think you have what it takes to date someone who doesn't weigh 300 pounds and look like she's slept under a bridge.

Just so you know, I am NOT here to address your mommy issues, or your feelings of inadequacy.  I AM here, however, to dump on you BECAUSE of those issues, rather than IN SPITE of them.

Ever wonder why so many women hate men?  It's because we've never met one.

Get the hell off of my planet, you useless retards.  Christ, I hate you all.  Drink arsenic.

Serious inquiries only.

This should be committed to memory for IRL use. :mittens:
Scantily-Clad Inspector of Gigantic and Unnecessary Cashews, Texas Division
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