Dear Filthy Assistant

[Doktor Howl]

Incidentally, the problem became self-evident today on startup, when the 200 pound baffle broke loose and ricocheted around the tank, denting the 1/5" thick double hull in 25 places.  The reactor is a total loss.

Had we been dumb enough to follow Larry's line of thinking, the person inside the reactor would have been turned into a red greasy spot. 

[Luna]

Incidentally, the problem became self-evident today on startup, when the 200 pound baffle broke loose and ricocheted around the tank, denting the 1/5" thick double hull in 25 places.  The reactor is a total loss.

Had we been dumb enough to follow Larry's line of thinking, the person inside the reactor would have been turned into a red greasy spot.

Jesus fuck.

Point out to anybody with a fucking brain that if people hadn't had to spend hours convincing Filthy Fucking Stupid Assistant not to fucking murder somebody, maybe that time could have been spent on figuring out the fucking problem and MAYBE avoided totaling the reactor.

Glad nobody got hurt.

[Doktor Howl]

Naw.  This was so weird and unpredictable that my boss isn't even pissed off.  Just sort of stunned.

Me, I expect this shit because I am a rationalist, and therefore believe in gremlins.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Incidentally, the problem became self-evident today on startup, when the 200 pound baffle broke loose and ricocheted around the tank, denting the 1/5" thick double hull in 25 places.  The reactor is a total loss.

Had we been dumb enough to follow Larry's line of thinking, the person inside the reactor would have been turned into a red greasy spot.

Wowwww...

[Anna Mae Bollocks]

Yep. Dok had a hand in keeping someone from being squeegeed off the wall into a closed casket.

I hope they fucking appreciate that.

[navkat]

I don't undersand what would ever have been up for debate when someone goes "Hey, let's put a dude in there!"

I am continually shocked by the fact that the people who say these types of things don't spend their downtime with a sack of birdseed and an anvil, chasing a roadrunner around the desert.

[Bruno]

Incidentally, the problem became self-evident today on startup, when the 200 pound baffle broke loose and ricocheted around the tank, denting the 1/5" thick double hull in 25 places.  The reactor is a total loss.

Had we been dumb enough to follow Larry's line of thinking, the person inside the reactor would have been turned into a red greasy spot.

I'm sure he would have argued that they weren't actually dead, just very lazy.

[Freeky]

I don't undersand what would ever have been up for debate when someone goes "Hey, let's put a dude in there!"

I am continually shocked by the fact that the people who say these types of things don't spend their downtime with a sack of birdseed and an anvil, chasing a roadrunner around the desert.

Roadrunner was a dick, and coyote was a genius who was hungry and had horrendous luck.

[Cardinal Pizza Deliverance.]

Holy shit, Roger. Please tell me you are documenting this shit and have hopes of getting this guy fired and or reduced to mop jockey?

[Reginald Ret]

This reminds me of Paolo Bacigalupi's short story Pump six. Where a mediocre sewage pump maintenance engineer slowly comes to the conclusion that he is the smartest man on earth because everyone else somehow became retarded. He has the kind of colleagues that think the proper response to a total failure of one of the 10 sewage pumps failing is to have a toiletpaper fight in the cafeteria.
He later tries to contact the manufacturers of the pumps for parts but they went bankrupt 30 years ago, they had made their pumps too good, no one who bought one needed any repair or replacements for the next 60 years. (Pump 6 is now over 100 years old)
So he does what any man out of his depth does, he tries to delegate. Sadly, noone at the university is answering and when he goes there in person he sees all students fucking on the lawn, half the buildings are boarded up and there is a lock on the library. No one is teaching, no one is studying and there is only one professors widow left guarding the library against students looking for stuff to burn.

His other short stories are even more shocking and or depressing. Great writer.