Touching Ancient Objects D'Arte

[Elder Iptuous]

It really would be easy to do, most of the stuff is nearly head-level. It'll be getting photographic evidence that will be difficult.

No cell phones allowed?

[Doktor Howl]

I used to go around pissing on things.

I had a dog that did that.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

WHY ISN'T THIS THREAD ABOUT FONDLING ROGER???

[Doktor Howl]

WHY ISN'T THIS THREAD ABOUT FONDLING ROGER???

At first, I was all like "WHY ISN'T EVERY THREAD ABOUT FONDLING ROGER?"

And then I looked at the title again, and I was like



Revenge will be mine, you latte-slurping Portland Bastiche!

[Cuddlefish]

It really would be easy to do, most of the stuff is nearly head-level. It'll be getting photographic evidence that will be difficult.

No cell phones allowed?

Yeah, they're allowed, we're just gonna have to be slick about it.

WHY ISN'T THIS THREAD ABOUT FONDLING ROGER???

No offense, I don't care how old Rogers balls are, I am not licking them. It's too close to his Holy hate-shitting hole. I'd be too afraid of blow-back.

Plus, I'm a selfish prick that can't be bothered to provide a decent reach-around.

[EK WAFFLR]

Personally, I like to perform acts of frotteurism to Munch paintings and lewd sculptures.

That's cool, and all, but the licking makes for a full-sensory experience. I suggest you integrate it into your non-consensual pelvis-on-art bump n' grinding.

I will definitely try licking Munch's Madonna the next time around!
Thanks!

[Cuddlefish]

Personally, I like to perform acts of frotteurism to Munch paintings and lewd sculptures.

That's cool, and all, but the licking makes for a full-sensory experience. I suggest you integrate it into your non-consensual pelvis-on-art bump n' grinding.

I will definitely try licking Munch's Madonna the next time around!
Thanks!

Hey, whatever turns you on, man.

*waits till no one is looking

*

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

WHY ISN'T THIS THREAD ABOUT FONDLING ROGER???

At first, I was all like "WHY ISN'T EVERY THREAD ABOUT FONDLING ROGER?"

And then I looked at the title again, and I was like



Revenge will be mine, you latte-slurping Portland Bastiche!

[Deepthroat Chopra]

I used to go around pissing on things.

I had a dog that did that.

I stopped when I got a dog. She became my proxy.

[Triple Zero]

Now I am reminded of this Dutch kid that was videoed a few years ago giggling like a hysterical teenager as he slapped his penis against the Taj Mahal (you don't see the penis, so it's probably still on youtube somewhere).

[Cuddlefish]

So, mission accomplished. I licked the Chinese dragon (VERY intimidating, once you're face to face with the thing) and the big toe of Shiva. Sorry, no pics, but Twid and Suu saw me lick the dragon, and Rich provided cover from the security cameras while I licked Shiva's toe. Sure, pics would have been nice, but I have very credible witnesses. (In fact, Rich was so good at witnessing, he could be called an incredible witness).

[Nephew Twiddleton]

So, mission accomplished. I licked the Chinese dragon (VERY intimidating, once you're face to face with the thing) and the big toe of Shiva. Sorry, no pics, but Twid and Suu saw me lick the dragon, and Rich provided cover from the security cameras while I licked Shiva's toe. Sure, pics would have been nice, but I have very credible witnesses. (In fact, Rich was so good at witnessing, he could be called an incredible witness).

The best part of it was just afterward some security guy or docent or something came bolting into the room.



And then he bolted into a completely different one.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

I like the idea of getting thrown out of a museum for licking the antiquities.

[Richter]

So, mission accomplished. I licked the Chinese dragon (VERY intimidating, once you're face to face with the thing) and the big toe of Shiva. Sorry, no pics, but Twid and Suu saw me lick the dragon, and Rich provided cover from the security cameras while I licked Shiva's toe. Sure, pics would have been nice, but I have very credible witnesses. (In fact, Rich was so good at witnessing, he could be called an incredible witness).

The best part of it was just afterward some security guy or docent or something came bolting into the room.



And then he bolted into a completely different one.

I remember there was that one with the Black Sabbath ring tone too. 

Yeah, we looked about as far from trouble makers as possible.