Ask Bella

[Zurtok Khan]

I needed to move out once, too. You're right - it's probably the only thing that can cure you. But in the meantime you can do more than just whine about it. I recommend walking. Lots and lots of walks and/or swimming, biking, etc. Anything to get you moving and keep you ahead of the mosquito cloud - cuz trust me. Everybody has their own cloud that follows them and the secret is to outrun it. Seriously, it's about the best thing there is for that nervous breakdown feeling. If you hate the outdoors, an exercise bike is always good.

On second thought, what I really recommend is yoga. It's good for the body and for the mind. Very soothing, healthy and peace of mind promoting activity. I think you can take lessons and look at videos and stuff for free online.

Don't forget to lay around the house in between walks and exercising and drive your parents up the wall with your whining. I did and my folks were happy to help me move when the time came.  

You are my new prophet.  Go do some cartwheels.

[Zurtok Khan]

Bella, when I quit my job, will it be best to draw kinky pictures of the manager making ugly-bald-middlemanagement-sex with one of the assistant managers?

[Bella]

I don't know. What are you planning to do with the pictures?
And will they be signed or not?

Seriously, you could find yourself in some sort of legal mess if you try that in Utah.

[Burning Trees]

Bella, how can I get rid of Turd (ECH), Roger (for failing his CotSG constituents), and Hugh (for not flouncing)?

[Zurtok Khan]

Bella, how can I get rid of Turd (ECH), Roger (for failing his CotSG constituents), and Hugh (for not flouncing)?

You can't.  Like TeH Gnimbly once said, "This place is like the Hotel California - You can check out any time you like, but you can never leave."

[Malaul]

Bella, how can I get rid of Turd (ECH), Roger (for failing his CotSG constituents), and Hugh (for not flouncing)?

You can't.  Like TeH Gnimbly once said, "This place is like the Hotel California - You can check out any time you like, but you can never leave."

::applaudes::

[East Coast Hustle]

Bella, how can I get rid of Turd (ECH)?

buy my business. $175K gets rid of me forever.

[Bella]

Bella, how can I get rid of Turd (ECH)?

buy my business. $175K gets rid of me forever.

Dear Burning Trees,

I was going to say "Ask Turd". But he already answered.
And you could get rid of me for a measly $100K.

[Cain]

Would I get away with burning down the factory I work at? Not that I'm planning to or anything, um...I just wondered, hypothetically, could I?

[Bella]

Would I get away with burning down the factory I work at? Not that I'm planning to or anything, um...I just wondered, hypothetically, could I?

Dear Cain,

Are your clothes still pink? And do you own a natural looking woman's wig? Not that you would actually burn down the factory or anything, so you probably wouldn't have to dress up like a woman to throw off suspicion, right?

[Cain]

Would I get away with burning down the factory I work at? Not that I'm planning to or anything, um...I just wondered, hypothetically, could I?

Dear Cain,

Are your clothes still pink? And do you own a natural looking woman's wig? Not that you would actually burn down the factory or anything, so you probably wouldn't have to dress up like a woman to throw off suspicion, right?

Not at all.  besides, I have "people" for that.  or would, if I had any intent to harm the factory in any way.  Which I dont.

[Bella]

Not at all.  besides, I have "people" for that.  or would, if I had any intent to harm the factory in any way.  Which I dont.

I'm so glad you clarified that for me. Sounds to me like you'd be good to go - supposing you had any harmful intent in the first place - which you obviously don't.

[Guido Finucci]

Dear Bella,

Your colour of the day is 'kumquat'. Is that even a real colour? I thought it was a fruit.

Anyway -- what colou is it?

Guido.

[Bella]

Dear Bella,

Your colour of the day is 'kumquat'. Is that even a real colour? I thought it was a fruit.

Anyway -- what colou is it?

Guido.

Dear Guido,

Yeah, kumquats are a fruit - one of my favorites, in fact. They're kind of orange colored, but not quite - more like a cross between an orange and a peach. So I figured that since tangerines had their own color and oranges had their own color, then kumquats should too.

So basically, kumquat is probably only a real color to me. But I like it.

[gnimbley]

Q: What month is the best time to pick kumquats?
A: Kumquat May.