The Smile Sermon

[Payne]

being an impromptu sermon in open bar that I was originally loathe to remove from it's context. Having reflected on it more I decided to give it a new home. Enjoy.

Happy Wednesday.
Today will be better or I will kick it in the FUNT! THE FUNT!
I'm going to make my coffee and then sit on my butt some more. Yeah.
This Friday is Mr Squid's b-day. We're gonna go see the Edward Gorey exhibit at the art museum and eat frozen yogurt. Later, dinner at a Pho place with our friends.

I will not let my job get to me today. I will smile and ignore the fact that I want to kill everyone I work with. I will smile. I will smile.

I've seen your smile.

I have seen your smile. I've seen it before on many faces and in many places.

It's the kind of smile that involves mostly teeth. The lips, usually more given to a plump and fleshy arch, resemble a rictus. Hold firm, that you do not allow movement to cause irreprable damage to your facade.

It's the kind of smile that never truly reaches the eyes, at least not in the unconscious sense of muscles arranging themselves like so many eels over the orb of hardened and largely dead bone we entrust the day to day safety of our brains to. No. If it reaches the eyes, it's by more malevolent and rationalised ways.

It's that kind of expression you will see on the hedge fund manager's secretary as her boss opens the windown, 24 floors up, and prepares himself for the final crash. And she wills the bastard tyrant on with a will bordering on the physical. It's the kind of shit Goya used to paint on his walls, but seen from the other side.

People will see it and hurry by. They will take the superficial politeness and avoid looking deeper. There are things, Squiddy, things under that rippled surface that man was not supposed to have knowledge of. And sure, you can hold that smile for a day. For a week. For a month. But it will end. Something will crack it, and the sheer horror of the collapse will unleash something terrible and dark from behind your brain cage. From behind even your brain. From somewhere so deep that imagination is enough to cause you vertigo.

The witnesses will talk e'ermore about the laughter, Squiddy. And they will shudder as they contemplate the depths from which it rose. They'll buy a ticket to anywhere. Perhaps to Tucson...

[Dysfunctional Cunt]

Wow Payne.  That was great!! 

I have to wonder, is there a way to see the cracks in time to save yourself, or is it a crapshoot every day?  And I answer myself with my own question right?

I see that smile every day. 

The anchor of the morning news, she has that smile as she tells us the latest over night tragedy.  Who is dead, who isn't.  Who is homeless from the latest arson.  What businesses will be closing because they were robbed for the 10th time this year.

The lady next door who is living in the ghetto with 4 kids and a nowhere job.  So overweight she is in and out of the hospital monthly.  No where to go and no way to get there.

The UPS man, now he scares me, because he's not only smiling, he hums.  It makes the hair on the back of your neck stand on end.  When he looks directly at you, you can hear him screaming in his brain.

And there is who really scares me, those people who have gone so long just smiling away and trying to survive and then they shoot the people they have worked with for 30 years because they were laid off today.  It isn't coincidence they had the gun in there trunk.

Is it?

[The Good Reverend Roger]

I love this shit.

[Juana]

Ditto. , Payne.