ATTN: FRIENDS OF EARTHA

[Cain]

I never get crazy PMs 

[Doktor Howl]

Here's the part she was pleading with me to share...When I didn't, she started PMing to others.

A Real Wanker's Lament:

I ken the unrelenting Arizona sun hath rotted
Brain function till he thinks we all have plotted
Nefarious ways in which to usurp his power.
Sad really -  he's a legend only in his own lunch hour.

Roger faps his sad and empty days away.
He needs his postings at pd so he can play
Wise man to socially awkward preppies.
Their mindless admiration gives him big stiff happies.

A bitter man and twisted sore
He likes to lay down his so called Law
Which really amounts to "Look at me -
I've been this nasty since I was three!

And my mummy took her teats away
With them she now lets rough bikers play"
He's hated all the world ere since
(Apart from a few erotic prints)

Yet his preggo porn keeps him warm at night.
Oh his mummy issues are quite a sight
He even diapers himself - it's true
Though sure - receptive anal sex had much to do

With needing to stem the awful leakage
Of the bile that fills him. But as to why there's seepage
Out of every saggy prolapsed orifice of his.
It's mostly the shit he talks - mixed with his fapping jizz.

I don't think Rudyard Kipling is in any danger. 

(Also, "preggo porn"?  )

[Doktor Howl]

I never get crazy PMs 

Well, then YOU should annoy a barfly from Australia.  Catch her when she isn't out back giving rimjobs for gin money, and you should do fine.

[Doktor Howl]

She also stated that Nigel is a bad person for trying to get a degree.

[Salty]

I never get crazy PMs 

This can be arranged, I can even get good and drunk so you get the full experience.

[Doktor Howl]

I never get crazy PMs 

This can be arranged, I can even get good and drunk so you get the full experience.

Well, given Eartha's opinion of the entire board - as stated above - I think this is sort of like being in the men's room of the bars she goes too...Everyone gets a share, if you can wait in line long enough.

[Cain]

I found the poem kinda amusing, I'll admit.

I certainly hope she wasn't intending to insult you with it.  I'd laugh if someone wrote hate-poetry about me.  I mean, the jokes just write themselves.

[Doktor Howl]

I found the poem kinda amusing, I'll admit.

I certainly hope she wasn't intending to insult you with it.  I'd laugh if someone wrote hate-poetry about me.  I mean, the jokes just write themselves.

I've printed it off and taped it above my computer, in my office.   

The best part is her broad-brush drunken slurs against, well, everyone.  (verse 2, and she has some interesting ideas about gays, verse 5)

[Cain]

Well, you know, finding the right place in a verse to slip in "mind-control lazors" is a very difficult thing to accomplish....

[Doktor Howl]

Well, you know, finding the right place in a verse to slip in "mind-control lazors" is a very difficult thing to accomplish....

...Especially when you're stewed to the fucking gills on gin.

[Doktor Howl]

Come to think of it, she never DID explain the whole "North coast of India" thing.   

[Cain]

Clearly she was drunk.

"I'll show them....I'll show all those preppy middle class, Americo-centrist elitists"...she thought, as she stumbled to get up, knocking several gin bottles flying.  As she staggered to the bookshelf, she stumbled, but managed to grab an atlas as she fell.

"I'll show them all" she muttered, as she opened the page to a map of South Asia, not realizing she was opening the atlas upside down.

[Doktor Howl]

Clearly she was drunk.

"I'll show them....I'll show all those preppy middle class, Americo-centrist elitists"...she thought, as she stumbled to get up, knocking several gin bottles flying.  As she staggered to the bookshelf, she stumbled, but managed to grab an atlas as she fell.

"I'll show them all" she muttered, as she opened the page to a map of South Asia, not realizing she was opening the atlas upside down.

Apparently, she had her vindaloo recipe upside down, too.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Also, you have to love how she goes from zero to Chris Brown in less than a second, and then jabbers some shit about how we are easily trolled.

Oh, that was my favorite part. 

Me: "What's up with you spending hours looking at my profile and posts?"

ED:

[Q. G. Pennyworth]

Why is Ben Affleck mad at his arm?