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Messages - Prelate Diogenes Shandor

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1
Literate Chaotic / Re: ITT: Original Story Ideas
« on: January 21, 2015, 04:34:47 am »
The Aztecs were right about blood sacrifice being needed for the sun to rise, and the crops to grow, and the earth to exist (etc). The only reason the sun still rises and the crops still grow (etc) is because the Aztecs' mass sacrifices built up such a large extra positive balance.

2
Literate Chaotic / Re: ITT: Original Story Ideas
« on: January 19, 2015, 01:05:18 am »
Those shootings in France yesterday gave me an idea:

A scatological porno movie about mohammed.  I'm not sure of the details, but possibly it includes a scene with Mohammed and either Jesus or Abraham reenacting "Two Girls One Cup", occuring some time after mohammed's wives leave him and become lesbians because his penis is too small.
Hmm, I like the idea but it is not quite funny enough. Your anger is showing through, and getting angry at a provocative act is letting the terrorists win.

Maybe something more like this?
[TRIGGER WARNING, ARISTOCRAT JOKE WARNING]
http://www.aristocratsjokes.com/

I prefer to tell a version 0f the Aristocrats Joke that ends with the guy getting sued for plagarism by the producers of Jackass

3
Literate Chaotic / Re: ITT: Original Story Ideas
« on: January 19, 2015, 12:32:07 am »
-A sci-fi retelling of Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs, set on Pluto. The entire thing somehow turns into an allegory for the controversy that surrounded Pluto's demotion to a dwarf planet, and from there turns into a parody of heavyhanded political allegories.

-After the second coming, Jesus demands royalties on biblically based movies.

EDIT:

-The reason why there haven't been miracles since biblical times is that god has withdrawn from the world like John Galt. Contrary to both his expectations and those of the early Christians, this did not bring about the end of the world within the lifetimes of the first Christians.

4
Oh, my idea was just speculation on another possibility for before the big bang

5
Techmology and Scientism / Re: KAI! INSECT DONGS!
« on: January 14, 2015, 07:32:53 am »
Also, the female spotted hyena copulates and urinates through it's enlarged, penis-like clitoris.

Although unlike this fly it doesn't use it for penetration, it pulls it back and stretches the opening to allow penetration by the male, sort of like extreme sounding.

6
When I first saw this thread's title for some reason I read it as "penectomy" instead of "petroconomy". I wonder what Freud would have to say about that.

7
Homeopathish?

No, that's for a hypothesis which is demonstrably incorrect, but still gets trotted out anyway

A hypothesis that can't be tested is called "unfalsifiable"

"What can go wrong" most of the time isn't some sort of horrible 100 meter tall spider. Usually it results in something that just can't survive.

As a huge nerd I feel compelled to point out that the 100 meter spider probably couldn't survive either. It's weight would scale up disproportionally to the strength of it's muscles or the structural integrity of it's exoskeleton.

EDIT:
Also, going back to big bang related stuff, has anybody else thought about the possibility that the big bang was the result of a Big Rip in a previous universe, or rather from the effect of the big rip on a hadron in that universe?
When the repulsive force of dark energy began to rip its component quarks apart it would instead be converted into a prodigious quantity of matter due to Color Confinement

8
Literate Chaotic / Re: ITT: Original Story Ideas
« on: January 12, 2015, 11:20:17 pm »
Workers at a science museum foil burglars with Home Alone style traps devised from the science demonstrations, after security is incapacitated.

9
Infinite Jukebox this thing is simply wonderful...

Quote from: from the faq
What is this? - For when your favorite song just isn't long enough. This web app lets you upload a favorite MP3 and will then generate a never-ending and ever changing version of the song. It does what Infinite Gangnam Style did but for any song.
It never stops? - That's right. It will play forever.
How does it work? - We use the Echo Nest analyzer to break the song into beats. We play the song beat by beat, but at every beat there's a chance that we will jump to a different part of song that happens to sound very similar to the current beat. For beat similarity we look at pitch, timbre, loudness, duration and the position of the beat within a bar. There's a nifty visualization that shows all the possible transitions that can occur at any beat.

That song doesn't have very many pathways through the song. Try this one

http://labs.echonest.com/Uploader/index.html?trid=TRJZVBV14AD699E5F0

10
Literate Chaotic / Re: ITT: Original Story Ideas
« on: January 08, 2015, 09:09:32 pm »
Those shootings in France yesterday gave me an idea:

A scatological porno movie about mohammed.  I'm not sure of the details, but possibly it includes a scene with Mohammed and either Jesus or Abraham reenacting "Two Girls One Cup", occuring some time after mohammed's wives leave him and become lesbians because his penis is too small.

11
Literate Chaotic / Re: Unofficial What are you Reading Thread?
« on: January 08, 2015, 06:46:25 am »
Erratically alternating between Terry Pratchett's The Long Earth, books of Dilbert and Pearls Before Swine comics, and rulebooks from old editions of Dungeons and Dragons

Edit:
Also Wikipedia articles, especially (for the time being) ones on the topics of grammar, particle physics, B-movies, and historical comedic art forms

EDIT:
What I've read so far of The Long Earth seems very good.

EDIT:
Also got some good leads on b-movies to check out from the wikipedia articles. "The Conquerer" and "Caligula" seem especially promising.

12
Literate Chaotic / Re: ITT: Original Story Ideas
« on: January 08, 2015, 05:40:15 am »
*Syndicated cartoonists fight some kind of a deadly battle royale over the increasingly limited space available on modern newspaper comics pages.

13
Literate Chaotic / Re: ITT: Original Story Ideas
« on: January 03, 2015, 10:48:20 pm »
*How about a story about a guy who uses an Ouija board to produce the autobiographies of dead historical figures

*Murder and Suicide are adopted as Olympic sports

*It's 100 years in the future and the combination of a growing global sense of ennui and nihilism, along with an ever increasingly tolerant society has driven transgressive artists to have to resort to lives of rape, murder, cannibalism, and necrophilia in order to remain edgy and transgressive.

14
Principia Discussion / Re: What is the Principia's "John 3:16"?
« on: December 29, 2014, 09:30:29 pm »
If we expand beyond the Principia to include the SubGenius canon, I'd suggest"

Quote
we know that "...any inanity spouted by a SubGenius at any given time automatically becomes part of orthodox SubGenius Liturgy." It is one of the single greatest Tenets, for by its own very token one can also deny it later. It is erasable. For instance, a guilty SubGenius speaks an Inanity which later proves anti-nonprofit. He can then insist, "No, I didn't say that. It was merely my 'image'...my 'id' took over temporarily." Logically, then, nothing that a SubGenius says is any more or less true and consecrable than any other thing he just happens to utter - even (and especially) if they are contradictory

EDIT:
Actually, strike that, the Principia said it better:

Quote
All statements are true in some sense, false in some sense, meaningless in some sense, true and false in some sense, true and meaningless in some sense, false and meaningless in some sense, and true and false and meaningless in some sense.

15
Literate Chaotic / Re: Lovecraft for Squids: Scifi Religion Creation
« on: December 27, 2014, 11:01:45 pm »
Cephalopods lack proprioception entirely, if I'm not mistaken. Behaviorally, it's very interesting.

You are not only mistaken, but you are so very mistaken that I am wondering if you know what proprioception means.

It's possible they're taking wikipedia's article on proprioception overly literally where it states that the proprioceptors responsible for it are located in joints and in "skeletal striated muscles". If taken completely literally this would imply that a squid has little or no proprioception since a squid's skeleton has only one "bone" - and therefore no joints - and the muscles in its tentacles/arms aren't attached to it.

EDIT:
Also, regarding the Great Race of Yith, if I recall correctly the cones were only one of many forms that the Great Race had taken during its long existence.

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