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Messages - Prelate Diogenes Shandor

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1
Literate Chaotic / Re: ITT: Original Story Ideas
« on: July 20, 2017, 08:58:22 am »
Some ideas:

*Comedy skit: A televangelist openly calls upon the power of mammon

*Character: A heart failure patient in ancient Greece is kept alive by a retro-futuristic life support device consisting of four copper tubes, two archimedes screws and a rotating team of slaves to turn the cranks (2 apparatuses, one goes: tube from vena cava -> screwpump -> tube to pulmonary arteries, the other goes: tube from pulmonary arteries -> screw pump -> aorta)

*Comedy skit: The Count from Sesame Street ruins Halloween by accusing everyone of cultural appropriation

EDIT:

*satirical comedy skit: a group of birds are watching a news program (possibly based on one of the shows on Fox News Channel, possibly based on a normal local news program of the sort that reports semi-exclusively on murders and other felonies) hosted by scarecrows

EDIT:

*Schoolchildren bring a snowman to life by reciting a passage from the Necronomicon. Mayhem ensues

2
I recommend switching to postimage

3
Literate Chaotic / Re: ITT: Original Story Ideas
« on: July 14, 2017, 06:18:15 pm »
Comedy skit: After correcting a person for referring to a whale as a "fish" a pedant is cornered by an even more pedantic biologist who starts an argument about monophyletic clades

5
Literate Chaotic / Re: Ominous Fortune Cookie
« on: July 10, 2017, 06:16:27 pm »
postimg maybe

6
Literate Chaotic / Re: Ominous Fortune Cookie
« on: July 10, 2017, 08:23:35 am »
Neither can I

7
Literate Chaotic / Re: ITT: Original Story Ideas
« on: July 10, 2017, 08:23:02 am »
I've got a few more assorted ideas:

*A short about a prostitute who through some dubious implausible turn of events somehow winds up delivering a pizza. Like a reversed version of the porn cliche of the pizza delivery person who winds up having sex with a client

*An album of heavy metal covers of songs that have no business being heavy metal (things like Rainbow Connection, I Want It That Way, Pack Up Your Troubles In Your Old Kit Bag, Amazing Grace... not even necessarily a coherent theme to the songs other than they don't belong metal

*A workplace sitcom set somewhere offensive or unpleasant, like a brothel or a slaughterhouse (respectively)

*Skit: The Human Torch becomes a Buddhist monk in Tibet

*Various retellings of the myth of Pandora
---Pandora herself was not as a punishment for humanity (though the stuff in her container still was) but as an additional punishement for Prometheus, whose job of crafting new humans was rendered obsolete
---Pandora represented the introduction of gender roles and identity into a utopian society that, while already male and female, didn't make a big deal of it (and in this sense were not men and women, despite being male and female) until Pandora came along

*Skit about a religious alcoholic who claims he isn't drinking alone because God is with him

EDIT:
Another idea:

*The apocalypse has technically been going on for a very long time but has reached an impasse because when the four horsemen got to sub-saharan africa they liked it so much they decided to stay there forever.

8
Or Kill Me / Re: Look both ways before you cross
« on: July 08, 2017, 06:11:18 pm »
I'm having trouble with the idea that "everyone merges into the same culture, same ethnicity, homogeneous glob" is equivalent to "don't shit on people who date and/or have kids with people of other ethnicities/skin tones."

That is what would happen over time if mixed couples became the norm. If you're not ok with that than you're only ok with mixed couples as long as there's not a lot of them

9
Or Kill Me / Re: Look both ways before you cross
« on: July 07, 2017, 06:16:41 am »
Because they seem to be saying that only white people are the devil. Which needs to be corrected because it's racist.

10
Or Kill Me / Re: Look both ways before you cross
« on: July 07, 2017, 05:56:58 am »
I honestly don't get how this is so hard for people to understand.

I'm starting to believe that the left may be almost as stupid and thickheaded as the right. None of you seem to posess the capacity for any sort of rational thought or dialog, only unthinking knee-jerk responses based on stereotypes that don't even apply to the situation at hand.

What is so hard to understand about the idea that fighting against evil doesn't automatically make you good? Which side were the good guys in the battle of stalingrad? If your answer was "the soviet union" or "the nazis" you are incorrect. The correct answer was "nobody".

Here's another one for you
Q. Who were the bad guys in the Battle of Stalingrad?
A. The Soviet Union and the Nazis

the premise on the left is that white people are the devil and deserve to punished.  since they are the "smart" side, if you refuse to accept their premise, then you are "dumb" and not worth talking to

The thing is that I don;t even disagree with that. I believe that all races are equally the devil.

11
Or Kill Me / Re: Look both ways before you cross
« on: July 07, 2017, 05:23:01 am »
I honestly don't get how this is so hard for people to understand.

I'm starting to believe that the left may be almost as stupid and thickheaded as the right. None of you seem to posess the capacity for any sort of rational thought or dialog, only unthinking knee-jerk responses based on stereotypes that don't even apply to the situation at hand.

What is so hard to understand about the idea that fighting against evil doesn't automatically make you good? Which side were the good guys in the battle of stalingrad? If your answer was "the soviet union" or "the nazis" you are incorrect. The correct answer was "nobody".

Here's another one for you
Q. Who were the bad guys in the Battle of Stalingrad?
A. The Soviet Union and the Nazis

12
Or Kill Me / Re: Look both ways before you cross
« on: July 07, 2017, 05:17:32 am »
If you spend your time worrying about what minorities do and say with respect to white people as if that's where you need to spend your energy, while disregarding the mountain of shit white people continue to do to minorities, you're gonna have a bad time. It's like getting pissed off because some feminists "hate men", as if alleviating that sore spot is somehow going to bring balance to a system that's already heavily weighted against them. It's utterly ignorant.

At no point did I say to disregard the mountain of racist shit that racist whites do, I just said not to disregard the racist shit that racist non-white people do. I can summarize my position as two rules:

1.) When white people say/do stupid racist shit, call them out on it
2.) When non-white people say/do stupid racist shit, call them out on it

These rules are in no way mutually exclusive

And I'm not saying to waste your energy seeking out and correcting bad behavior by the people who aren't in power and aren't in a position to do much harm, but if it happens to be right there in front of you say something. (or at least don't waste your energy criticizing the person who does say something)

Also, just because the group currently in power doesn't deserve it and doesn't use it well that doesn't mean that the group not in power does and will. History is littered with revolutions and regime changes that did no good. The tsardom's out and the soviet union's in, the soviet union;s out and Putin's in; same shit different day. A roman emperor has a vision, the religious landscape of europe changes, no longer will the christians be persecuted by the the pagans, now the pagans will be persecuted by the christians.  And of course there's the endless parade of near interchangable dictators in many parts of the third world

Edit:
To quote Romeo & Juliet, "A plague on both your houses"

That sure is a long-winded way of saying "I'm not racist, but brown people should probably watch their step around me".

That's a strawman.

A less misleading version would go "...everyone should watch their step..." (though I must cede that "brown people" is a proper subset of "everyone" so the statement as written is technically true, albeit no more so that if it had said "...white people had better watch their step..."

13
High Weirdness / Re: ITT Mandela Effect fuckery biblical or otherwise
« on: July 07, 2017, 05:14:23 am »
I remember Obi-Wan cutting someone in half in the cantina but the only bug-like character I remember from ep.4 is Greedo, who appears later in the Cantina scene and is shot by Han Solo

14
Or Kill Me / Re: Look both ways before you cross
« on: July 07, 2017, 05:01:01 am »
If you spend your time worrying about what minorities do and say with respect to white people as if that's where you need to spend your energy, while disregarding the mountain of shit white people continue to do to minorities, you're gonna have a bad time. It's like getting pissed off because some feminists "hate men", as if alleviating that sore spot is somehow going to bring balance to a system that's already heavily weighted against them. It's utterly ignorant.

At no point did I say to disregard the mountain of racist shit that racist whites do, I just said not to disregard the racist shit that racist non-white people do. I can summarize my position as two rules:

1.) When white people say/do stupid racist shit, call them out on it
2.) When non-white people say/do stupid racist shit, call them out on it

These rules are in no way mutually exclusive

And I'm not saying to waste your energy seeking out and correcting bad behavior by the people who aren't in power and aren't in a position to do much harm, but if it happens to be right there in front of you say something. (or at least don't waste your energy criticizing the person who does say something)

Also, just because the group currently in power doesn't deserve it and doesn't use it well that doesn't mean that the group not in power does and will. History is littered with revolutions and regime changes that did no good. The tsardom's out and the soviet union's in, the soviet union;s out and Putin's in; same shit different day. A roman emperor has a vision, the religious landscape of europe changes, no longer will the christians be persecuted by the the pagans, now the pagans will be persecuted by the christians.  And of course there's the endless parade of near interchangable dictators in many parts of the third world

Edit:
To quote Romeo & Juliet, "A plague on both your houses"

15
Or Kill Me / Re: Look both ways before you cross
« on: July 07, 2017, 03:59:45 am »
I'll just go on assuming that you don't have a valid argument then

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