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Messages - Prelate Diogenes Shandor

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Literate Chaotic / Re: ITT: Original Story Ideas
« on: April 24, 2017, 01:09:19 am »
A method of reanimating the dead is discovered, but it is prohibitively expensive due to the fact that not only does it require a great deal of expertise and equipment, but it also can only be done in zero G (by analogy, consider reassembling a VHS cassette: the tape must go through three rollers as it goes between the reels, two of these rollers go around spindles attached from one side of the case, the other goes around a spingle attached from the other side. The cassette must be put back together deftly; whichever side is put on on top risks having its rollers fall off their spindle, or it it is turned on edge instead then the spools may fall out, but in zero gravity this operation would be trivial), this exacerbates the gap between rich and poor. But mostly it's an exploration of that thing I said about it being easier to fix things in zero gravity.

Literate Chaotic / Re: ITT: Original Story Ideas
« on: April 23, 2017, 07:17:13 am »
There are a bunch of cursed objects (of all different varieties, and many of them old), but they're only mildly cursed, causing things like hangnails and itchy watery eyes. The curses aren't even noticed or realized by most of the objects' owners until eventually a single antiquities collector coincidentally manages to accumulate 20 or thirty of them and the combined effects of the curses aggregate into a proper curse

Another idea:

A retelling of "Flowers For Algernon" goes off the rails halfway through and turns into something similar to the "ex-leper" vignette from "Monty Python's Life of Brian"

Literate Chaotic / Re: ITT: Original Story Ideas
« on: April 23, 2017, 06:29:40 am »
Subtly satirical skit about a professor giving a lecture about how vision works by an image being formed by the retina, passed by the retina to the optic nerve as nerve impulses, passed from the optic nerve to the visual cortex for processing and interpretation, and then passed to the rest of the brain - while at the same time deriding homonculus arguments, without realising that the valid explanation he just gave is isomorphic to a homonculus argument regressed three times (unless of course we take the homonculus argument as totally literal, but that would obviously be a strawman (I hope. I mean you'd have to be pretty demented to take that literally or even semi-literally (unless the wikipedia article is just very poorly explained, to the point of the introduction being completely different from/unrelated to the concept it's trying to explain)))

Literate Chaotic / Re: ITT: Original Story Ideas
« on: April 22, 2017, 02:09:15 am »
Some sci-fi ideas

*Sort of a more serious, harder sci-fi version of the premise of Futurama. The story of the employees of an interstellar courier service. The successful construction of an alcubierre drive has made transport ships the fastest form of interplanetary communication. The drive is dangerous and expensive due to using absurdly high energy pulses of squeezed light as its negative energy density source. The ephemeral nature of this method means that artificial wormholes are not practical and that the ship must advance in a rapid series of hops.
The alcubierre ships are unfavored however for many types of/reasons for passenger travel because they take significantly longer to reach their destination from the perspective of passengers than a conventional ship traveling at near light speed

*a slightly softer sci-fi about the creation (for whatever reason) of a non-rotatable object by using some kind of perfectly rigid unobtanium to create very very very long bars extending in all three directions of length such that any rotation would require infinite energy due to relativistic effects of the mass of the endpoints

Literate Chaotic / Re: ITT: Original Story Ideas
« on: April 21, 2017, 05:50:07 pm »
Two more ideas

*An unofficial "Flatland" sequel exploring what things would be like if there were a second dimension of time.

*A musical based on the Hellraiser movie series. ♪"Oh There's a secret song at the center of the world, and its sound is like razors through flesh."♪

Literate Chaotic / Re: ITT: Original Story Ideas
« on: April 19, 2017, 07:34:25 am »
I think it was in Kino's Journey

Also, wasn't there also a vignette like this in Let's Visit the World of the Future?

Literate Chaotic / Re: ITT: Original Story Ideas
« on: April 19, 2017, 02:04:15 am »
Two ideas:

*The question of whether it is qualitatively different to nuke an area vs to destroy an equal area with a lot of smaller bombs explored through a conflation of the biblical conflicts between Israel and Moab and "Beneath the Planet of the Apes". With the faction corresponding to Israel worshipping a single nuclear bomb, and the pagan faction worshipping several high yield conventional bombs. Basically the whole thing is a "Moab" pun.

*Parody of "Charlie & the Chocolate Factory" in which a Vladimir Putin expy runs some sort of shady business staffed by bright orange "Trumpa Lumpas"

Literate Chaotic / Re: Ominous Fortune Cookie
« on: April 16, 2017, 09:14:37 pm »
"The light at the end of the tunnel is an oncoming vehicle"

"Retribution is on it's way"

"All troubles that you have end quickly when you pass away"

"In the eyes of drunkards everythig is beautiful"

"Charles Manson say: 'how do communicate to a whole group of people? You stand up and take the worst fear symbol and say "There, now I've got your fear. Now I've got your fear." And your fear is your power and your power is your control'"

"Resist the temptation to let your instincts guide you"

"Make a budget or lose your house"

"You know where you want to go, but you cannot get there from here"

"[The Sith say:] 'Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to power. Power leads to victory. Through victory one's chains are broken. [The force will set you free.]'"

"Enthisiastic leadership gets you a promotion when you least deserve it"

"Others enjoy your money"

"A tearful message is on it's way to you"

"Don't get caught"

"You will be selected for a promotion due to an underling's accomplishments"

Literate Chaotic / Re: ITT: Original Story Ideas
« on: April 16, 2017, 06:48:28 am »
Comedy skit: The mad scientist from Human Centipede demonstrates how to make a tandem bicydle out of two regular bicycles

Literate Chaotic / Re: Ominous Fortune Cookie
« on: April 15, 2017, 07:24:31 am »
"Rarely do great beauty and great virtue dwell together and you are no exception"

"there are lessons to be learned by eavesdropping on others"

"Love takes practice. Sleep around.

"You'll pay to inow what you really think"

"You are a fluke of the universe"

"You will be rewarded for your ignorance and brutality"

"Self-esteem and self-delusion are one and the same"

"Benefit by doing things that are forbidden"

"Hope is wasted on the hopeless"

"Qoheleth say" 'Everything is meaningless'"

"Sartre say: 'Hell is other people'"

"You will live in interesting times"

"People are things"

"You will discover your hidden weaknesses"

"Failure comes from within"

"You have the incompetence within you"

"Lord NHGH gazes upon you"


"Qoheleth say: 'The living know that they shall die: but the dead know not any thing'"

"Qoheleth say: 'As the fishes that are taken in an evil net, and as the birds that are caught in the snare; so are the sons of men snared in an evil time, when it falleth suddenly upon them.'"


"Kill yourself"


"[Starkweather say] 'Dead people are all on the same level'"

"Ted Bundy say: 'Guilt. It's this mechanism we use to control people. It's an illusion. It's a kind of social control mechanism and it's very unhealthy.'"

"Ted Bundy say: 'When you feel the last bit of breath leaving their body, you're looking into their eyes. A person in that situation is God.""

Aneristic Illusions / Re: General Trump hilarity free-for-all thread
« on: April 12, 2017, 02:09:16 am »
*eta: Does this mean there are now a couple of dozen top secret missile guidance systems currently just lying around in the syrian desert?

Presumably they're only classified so that people won't know how bad they are.

Literate Chaotic / Re: The Monkey Experiment
« on: April 09, 2017, 03:09:02 pm »
This is great!

Literate Chaotic / Re: ITT: Original Story Ideas
« on: April 09, 2017, 03:06:58 pm »
Werewolves are real and have fallen unwillingly under the control of a supervillain who has stolen a bunch of moon rocks for the purpose of triggering lycanthropes to transform out of season

Another idea:
A bunch of punk wizards have spraypainted magical runes of power on walls and street signs all over the city. These wreck havoc with all who look at or pass by them. Some are cursed with ill-fortune, some are blinded, some are unable to pass, that sort of thing

Literate Chaotic / Re: ITT: Original Story Ideas
« on: April 09, 2017, 02:43:29 pm »
That sounds a bit like the plot of In the Mouth of Madness

Literate Chaotic / Re: ITT: Original Story Ideas
« on: April 09, 2017, 08:51:32 am »
A comedy skit about a professor who has chosen to represent the variables in a particular equation as B, Beta, and Eszett, apparently oblivious to the fact that these three letters are all represented by the same glyph

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