Ok, another film about a shopping mall security guard, but with a twist. In this one instead of the real police not respecting the protagonist (as was the case in Paul Blart), they instead respect him too much and he beomes some kind of bizarre Batman-esque figure complete with a "Shopping mall security signal" the the police commissioner shines in the sky
Guy applies for a job at the Apple Store only to be hampered by the fact that the training materials make it look like a suicide cult (including a VHS tape of Steve Jobs doing the Heaven's Gate "humanity will be recycled"/"come with us" thing). When he quits, the entire (matching-Nike-wearing) current set of employees commit suicide in order to "take their souls with him". Twist: it works, and for the rest of his life, he is followed around by the ghosts of thirty Apple suicide cultists who *won't shut up*.
Comedy Skit: Guy goes to buy some gadget at the Apple Store but is hampered by the fact that all of the "Geniuses" are profoundly mentally retarded I've
been told personally experienced how (they form a circle, facing each other, and speak in tounges (Star Trek?)) its actually a hive mind that they share in common.
I'm glad that I'm not the only one who gets a modern cult vibe from the Apple Store (though I always thought of them as more like Scientology)