YUO: HOT SHIT OR NOT! (advice to noobs)

[saint aini]

This is me fire breathing at a house party. Yes, that is real fire.  That is not an illusion or photoshop manipulating. Hot shit, you might say?

Yes and no.

I bring you this image because a number of those who shall not be named think they are the greatest thing since sliced bread, the hot shit, the uber true Discordian.  (Ich bilde tote ein "uber true Discordian".)

At the house party, yes. They never seen anyone breathe or eat fire live (and live).

At some of the theatre and fetish events I have gone to, I'm not yet on the radar for being considered for being invited to breathe fire because there are those who are far greater than I in this particular skill.  In different areas, I may be the one who is the cream of the crop, but I must remember always there may be one who is greater than I. 

I'm cool with that.  I know my place.  I know my destination.  I know life is a journey.  I have other skills for the shows, the most important being enjoying the show.

My advice to those who shall not be named is as follows:

In your Mister Rogers^tm Neighborhood, you may be the best of the best, the most creative, coolest kid on the block.  Here, on this caberet-esque stage, you're just an audience member until you prove otherwise.  Tip those on stage, but don't get on stage until you are ready for this stage.  You don't know where the weak floor boards or trap doors are until you have been here for a while.  The only way you can prove otherwise is by repeatedly demonstrating on small levels that we can trust and enjoy you on larger ones.

Your post count will not help you.  Your connections on other boards will not persuade me to alter my opinion of you on this board.  Only by your deeds are you judged worthy of being accepted into the fold as a friend or worthy of being abused until I am smiling again (and you will enjoy the abuse.)

Yes, we're interested in the Principia Discordia, but not so much as to go "ZOMG 23!" every time we see that damned number. 

To breathe fire you must start with breathing water in the same manner.  It's safer and won't kill you.

In similar manner, play conservatively at first.  Convince us you use both hemispheres of your brain by being coherent about the Chao you see.  No one will be enlightened by you saying "MU" or speaking in duckspeak.  Then show us your true creative potential.  If you are not going to listen to any other piece of advice, at least put some effort into your posts.  Make them at least look like you took time to think, reflect, research or create.

I did not start fire breathing over one night.  It's been about a year since I started learning fire in general.  I have been burned by fire breathing, but not in ways that you might expect.  You see, when the fuel gets on you and stays on you for an extended period, it irritates the skin.  Swallow too much and you get pneumonia or the runs.  I have been lucky that I have not had that which shall not be mention happen.

You will get burned on these forums. It's par for the course. Anything worth doing comes at a cost to someone.

[Thurnez Isa]

well I see you got in contact with that photographer

[saint aini]

well I see you got in contact with that photographer

Thanks...

I'm still going through the images to pick out the best of the best.

I should have some posted tomorrow.

[Cramulus]

I support you and agree with you here Aini, but the subtext of your message worries me. I have a gag reflex for the "prove yourself to us" vibe. I don't like it when n00bs feel they have to demonstrate how cool they are to be 'accepted' into our folds.

What you're saying here is that these boards have social rules and norms, and that everyone should pretty much respect them. And I agree, 'cause that's how message boards work. But I think we walk a dangerous path when we say "don't be a weird noob" and at the same time "prove yourself to us".

For the record I've only been around since dec 06, and I've only seen about two ZOMG 23 n00bs. There's another type of n00b that should worry / has worried / will continue to annoy us, and we don't have a good meme to describe that yet.

I'll remind everyone that a certain n00b who won't be mentioned never said 23 or echoed any old PD jokes.


But that's all a big distraction from your main point, "post conservatively at first" which is right on the money. cheers.

[Kimmy Gibbler]

To breathe fire you must start with breathing water in the same manner.  It's safer and won't kill you.

[P3nT4gR4m]

There's another type of n00b that should worry / has worried / will continue to annoy us, and we don't have a good meme to describe that yet.

I'll remind everyone that a certain n00b who won't be mentioned never said 23 or echoed any old PD jokes.

There is always an idiot out there that will annoy. Annoyance is something you do to yourself - don't blame it on teh dickhead. These noobs are sent to test us and therefore the meme to describe might be something along the lines of 'puchbag' or 'crash test dumbass.

Now repeat after me: "punchbags are good. Punchbags test my calm, my stamina and my aim. Always will I give thanks for the punchbag and the opportunity it affords to feel better about myself"

[saint aini]

I support you and agree with you here Aini, but the subtext of your message worries me. I have a gag reflex for the "prove yourself to us" vibe. I don't like it when n00bs feel they have to demonstrate how cool they are to be 'accepted' into our folds.

What you're saying here is that these boards have social rules and norms, and that everyone should pretty much respect them. And I agree, 'cause that's how message boards work. But I think we walk a dangerous path when we say "don't be a weird noob" and at the same time "prove yourself to us".

For the record I've only been around since dec 06, and I've only seen about two ZOMG 23 n00bs. There's another type of n00b that should worry / has worried / will continue to annoy us, and we don't have a good meme to describe that yet.

I'll remind everyone that a certain n00b who won't be mentioned never said 23 or echoed any old PD jokes.


But that's all a big distraction from your main point, "post conservatively at first" which is right on the money. cheers.

ZOMG 23 in my taxonomy covers all of the nuts who think some obscure piece of something is the cat's meow, even if it's their own shit on their knees.

The "audience member until proven otherwise" line is more along the lines of demonstrate you are cool by being cool, not jumping in on the scene and trying to shock and awe with your craziest idea first.  They prove themselves by their restraint from the more dramatic methods until they have mastered the lesser dramatic methods.

I hate the shock and awe type of noob.

Yes, every society, no matter how anarchistic, has a social contract. 

It's okay to be a weird noob, just please don't be a stupid weird noob until after you show us some intelligence so that we know your stupidity is parody and not a general condition of your fucked up life.

What of the path that says "be a weird noob"?  That hasn't worked out too well.  It's increased the post count and shook the baby, but at what cost?

I would rather see noobs told to temper their weirdness until they get a sense of what's going to work rather than using a brute force method in a fatally flawed attempt to find out what will make us lail while we're waiting for the next one to arrive.  A little weirdness can go quite a long way.

[saint aini]

There's another type of n00b that should worry / has worried / will continue to annoy us, and we don't have a good meme to describe that yet.

I'll remind everyone that a certain n00b who won't be mentioned never said 23 or echoed any old PD jokes.

There is always an idiot out there that will annoy. Annoyance is something you do to yourself - don't blame it on teh dickhead. These noobs are sent to test us and therefore the meme to describe might be something along the lines of 'puchbag' or 'crash test dumbass.

Now repeat after me: "punchbags are good. Punchbags test my calm, my stamina and my aim. Always will I give thanks for the punchbag and the opportunity it affords to feel better about myself"

They are not sent... They find us.  That's a good thought channeled from Celine, Silly.

However, I dare say that we know too well about provocation.

[saint aini]

To breathe fire you must start with breathing water in the same manner.  It's safer and won't kill you.

You start by spitting water.  After you master the technique with water, you practice with fuel.  When you are sure of the technique with fuel, you introduce the torch.

[Messier Undertree]

Meh... I don't think there should be any set rules for how a new member should act at first.

You'll notice that most of the members here were quite ZOMGPINEAL23 to begin with.

As long as they get that out of their systems eventually, they'll be just fine.

[saint aini]

Meh... I don't think there should be any set rules for how a new member should act at first.

You'll notice that most of the members here were quite ZOMGPINEAL23 to begin with.

As long as they get that out of their systems eventually, they'll be just fine.

It's only advice.

Advice that can be ignored.

I only point out the way to Hell.

It's your decision to not go that way.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Stickied.

[hunter s.durden]

I saw this as:

Dear n00bs,
You're not special. Noone cares. Good luck.

People either act like ass clowns and get flamed to death, or they just fit in. Look at Payne vs. Bhode. It's natural selection.

[Idem]

I saw this as:

Dear n00bs,
You're not special. Noone cares. Good luck.

People either act like ass clowns and get flamed to death, or they just fit in. Look at Payne vs. Bhode. It's natural selection.

Was Bhode even a 23fnord?  I don't think so.  He was just a fucking idiot.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

I saw this as:

Dear n00bs,
You're not special. Noone cares. Good luck.

People either act like ass clowns and get flamed to death, or they just fit in. Look at Payne vs. Bhode. It's natural selection.

Was Bhode even a 23fnord?  I don't think so.  He was just a fucking idiot.

I prefered the term "murderous-yet-boring psychopath".