ITT: Best Posts of the Day

[Sir Squid Diddimus]

 

[LMNO]

I fucking love my balls.

My balls are like two mighty quails eggs, held in a wrinkly bag of holding, made from elephant skin. My balls are like two clusters of walnuts, hanging proud from an erect tree branch. The sheer majesty of my nards can only be matched by a chance sighting of the Queen, passing by in all Her Royal finery. My nuts, are worshiped as mighty spunk filled gods by all who behold them.

Often, small children stop and point, and go "mother? what is that?" to which their mother reply's, "hush child. turn your eyes from the GLORY of all that is good and holy. for over there, are Broken AI's magical bollocks of goodness. Like the perfect mean, they represent an underpinning of things that we cannot comprehend..."

My balls have had mighty operas wrote in their name, have caused great wars to churn the dirt assunder and kill legions of men. My scrote is National Trust Heritage site. There are tours from 9am till 3pm on Mondays, Tuesdays and Thursdays (mothers union bake sale Friday).

My dangly jangly sack has been mistook, upon first glance, by many a fair maiden to be a Faberge egg set. The Chinese covet them, as they hear that dried minced BAI balls make a fine aphrodisiac.

All in all, I love my balls. As do others.

They are my gift to the world.

Like jesus or something.

[Thurnez Isa]

*shrug* I'm basically done at this point.

Its all just slinging insults over an argument from someone who fails so hard at getting it. Of course, she barged in here not knowing the context of this rant (which is very different than an essay)  whatsoever. I can take shit out of context and make it mean whatever I want too. Are we amazed yet? No. That's not likely to change either.

I'm new here, I didn't know the context of the rant, and I still got what Nigel was going for.

I guess since DK is the self-proclaimed smartest person here, that means if he reads a post one way and everyone else reads it another, then his understanding is obviously correct and everyone else's understanding, including the author's, is mistaken.  The self-proclaimed smartest person can never be wrong, so if anyone disagrees it must be because we are too stupid to understand that he's right.  Everyone is stupid except DK.

Arguing against him is like arguing against the time cube guy.  -1 x -1 = +1 is stupid and evil.

--
@LMNO 

He has discovered the true hidden meaning of the text through semiotic engagement in its imagery and use of language, which mere peasants such as you and myself could never hope to accomplish.  Roland Barthes is quietly weeping somewhere, but his ilk will suffer the worst, when DK and his structuralist hordes overrun the halls of academia and cast out the post-structuralists from the temple.  Begone, ye defilers!  We shall have no destablization of text here.

[Pariah]

Not everyone is live in Amerikkka like you, motherfuck. I could stab you in face and get rewarded with the medal.

In my country we are kill pompous bbadori like you in front of jubilant crowd at Juche tower.

Try go crying to you capitalist master when KWP secret service is treat you like filthy "intellectual" dog enemy of the invincible Corean people that you are.



Is you on left.

[Sir Squid Diddimus]

damn you beat me to it

[bds]

I fucking love my balls.

My balls are like two mighty quails eggs, held in a wrinkly bag of holding, made from elephant skin. My balls are like two clusters of walnuts, hanging proud from an erect tree branch. The sheer majesty of my nards can only be matched by a chance sighting of the Queen, passing by in all Her Royal finery. My nuts, are worshiped as mighty spunk filled gods by all who behold them.

Often, small children stop and point, and go "mother? what is that?" to which their mother reply's, "hush child. turn your eyes from the GLORY of all that is good and holy. for over there, are Broken AI's magical bollocks of goodness. Like the perfect mean, they represent an underpinning of things that we cannot comprehend..."

My balls have had mighty operas wrote in their name, have caused great wars to churn the dirt assunder and kill legions of men. My scrote is National Trust Heritage site. There are tours from 9am till 3pm on Mondays, Tuesdays and Thursdays (mothers union bake sale Friday).

My dangly jangly sack has been mistook, upon first glance, by many a fair maiden to be a Faberge egg set. The Chinese covet them, as they hear that dried minced BAI balls make a fine aphrodisiac.

All in all, I love my balls. As do others.

They are my gift to the world.

Like jesus or something.

#

I just love the way he just compared testicles to Jesus.

[the last yatto]

You guys will have lost the only person here who seems to have a clue about Discordianism, but alas,

⠓⠔ ⠎

[Thurnez Isa]

holy shit where is that from?

[Idem]

DK, I like fisting men.

Depending on how you feel about it, it might be a beautiful, trusting, intimate interaction.

Or, you might feel terribly violated.

Depending on your mindset.

So you get my point then, right?

Yes; that finding you, physically pinning you and shoving my hand up your ass while you struggle and cry is basically no different an experience for you than consensual fisting, other than being non-consensual.

Oh wait. Is that really your point? Because it's really stupid. Biologically, me sticking my hand in your ass is the same whether it's consensual or non-consensual. The difference lies in whether you WANT me to stick my hand up your ass; in the way you experience it, whether you resist, whether I have to force you, and a plethora of other differences.

Isn't that true of nearly everything we experience in life?

You impotent, overcompensating dipshit.

[Suu]

I'd find it kind of funny if someone had an alt named "alt".

Actually, now that I've typed that out I don't find it very funny at all.

Thank you for share, slow-wit pig fucker.

It's about time you showed up.  How the fuck do I get rid of these fucking worms I caught at your party?  They're sort of burrowing around my flesh like "Tremors" crossed with "Big Busted Butt Babes III".

Get rid of?

Okay, just reduce the fucking population.  The little bastards have starting singing "The Internationalle", and yesterday, a tiny black flag popped out of my penis.

[Triple Zero]

I looked at the thumbnail and said to myself "It appears to be a close-up of a woman inserting something into her vagina" so I clicked on it. 

made me LOL

[Cain]

I seem to only date girls with Bi-polar or Borderline Personality Disorder. Perfectly sane women are boring.

ALL women are nuts. They just come in degrees.

They come in degrees?

Well that explains why all my girlfriends keep telling me "that was a masterful fuck".

If you see yo momma on a road, make space, cuz man that's one fat chick.

[Aufenthatt]

I'd find it kind of funny if someone had an alt named "alt".

Actually, now that I've typed that out I don't find it very funny at all.

Thank you for share, slow-wit pig fucker.

It's about time you showed up.  How the fuck do I get rid of these fucking worms I caught at your party?  They're sort of burrowing around my flesh like "Tremors" crossed with "Big Busted Butt Babes III".

Get rid of?

Okay, just reduce the fucking population.  The little bastards have starting singing "The Internationalle", and yesterday, a tiny black flag popped out of my penis.

[Lies]

                Cause Spags in the Hood, we always Lard. 
                Come trolling that trash and we'll mock you hard.
                Ain't nothing in life but to post legit. 
                Don't quote my post, I ain't said shit.
                                           \


No recollection of what that was about.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

That goes beyond "stupid." Do we even have a word for idiocy of that magnitude?

Government