Rant 38: Serious Discordians? (The Jihad is On!)

[Rupert Giles]

There are already well enough teenagers out there to ensure Homo Sapiens Sapiens' survivance anyway, so it's not much of a problem if we recycle the dumbest, cruelest couple of them.

Hah! Homo sapiens are the living species of SNAFU. It's a wonder we have survived this long.

Queue The Really Bad Anthro Jokes...

...

Here.

If Homo Erectus really was Homo Erectus, is that why they're extinct?

No.  They're extinct because they...


LIKED TO RIP IT UP THE BELLY!

[Irreverend Hugh, KSC]

There are already well enough teenagers out there to ensure Homo Sapiens Sapiens' survivance anyway, so it's not much of a problem if we recycle the dumbest, cruelest couple of them.

Hah! Homo sapiens are the living species of SNAFU. It's a wonder we have survived this long.

Queue The Really Bad Anthro Jokes...

...

Here.

If Homo Erectus really was Homo Erectus, is that why they're extinct?

No.  They're extinct because they...


LIKED TO RIP IT UP THE BELLY!

Well, there's a sound explanation. Those bastards probably got what they deserved then. What I want to know is, WTF happened to all the goddamned Neantherthals? And where is Jesus' motorbike?

[Rupert Giles]

There are already well enough teenagers out there to ensure Homo Sapiens Sapiens' survivance anyway, so it's not much of a problem if we recycle the dumbest, cruelest couple of them.

Hah! Homo sapiens are the living species of SNAFU. It's a wonder we have survived this long.

Queue The Really Bad Anthro Jokes...

...

Here.

If Homo Erectus really was Homo Erectus, is that why they're extinct?

No.  They're extinct because they...


LIKED TO RIP IT UP THE BELLY!

Well, there's a sound explanation. Those bastards probably got what they deserved then. What I want to know is, WTF happened to all the goddamned Neantherthals? And where is Jesus' motorbike?

I believe the current consensus on Homo Neanderthalensis (THEM) is that they were displaced from resource rich habitats by the encroachment of Homo Sapiens Sapiens (US) and as we continued to press northward we pushed them into more and more places that were poorer and poorer in resources until we pretty much overwhelmed them with being healthier and more populus.  We weren't smarter -- I'm fairly sure of that.  Aside from having two Anthro Majors in the house who I talk with fairly frequently about this, they had a larger brain than we did, if only marginally.  Also, they had better tools than we did (at the time we first met.)  What probably really did them in was Diseases they'd never been exposed to before We came along, and climate change -- they were suited to a particular environment, and that environment was gradually disappearing.

Of course, they might have just refused to invite Eris to a wedding.

[Irreverend Hugh, KSC]

Well, there's a sound explanation. Those bastards probably got what they deserved then. What I want to know is, WTF happened to all the goddamned Neantherthals? And where is Jesus' motorbike?

I believe the current consensus on Homo Neanderthalensis (THEM) is that they were displaced from resource rich habitats by the encroachment of Homo Sapiens Sapiens (US) and as we continued to press northward we pushed them into more and more places that were poorer and poorer in resources until we pretty much overwhelmed them with being healthier and more populus.  We weren't smarter -- I'm fairly sure of that.  Aside from having two Anthro Majors in the house who I talk with fairly frequently about this, they had a larger brain than we did, if only marginally.  Also, they had better tools than we did (at the time we first met.)  What probably really did them in was Diseases they'd never been exposed to before We came along, and climate change -- they were suited to a particular environment, and that environment was gradually disappearing.

Of course, they might have just refused to invite Eris to a wedding.

I'd say the latter explanation makes the most sense. But who knows? Maybe it had something to do with hairstyles.

[Rupert Giles]

Well, there's a sound explanation. Those bastards probably got what they deserved then. What I want to know is, WTF happened to all the goddamned Neantherthals? And where is Jesus' motorbike?

I believe the current consensus on Homo Neanderthalensis (THEM) is that they were displaced from resource rich habitats by the encroachment of Homo Sapiens Sapiens (US) and as we continued to press northward we pushed them into more and more places that were poorer and poorer in resources until we pretty much overwhelmed them with being healthier and more populus.  We weren't smarter -- I'm fairly sure of that.  Aside from having two Anthro Majors in the house who I talk with fairly frequently about this, they had a larger brain than we did, if only marginally.  Also, they had better tools than we did (at the time we first met.)  What probably really did them in was Diseases they'd never been exposed to before We came along, and climate change -- they were suited to a particular environment, and that environment was gradually disappearing.

Of course, they might have just refused to invite Eris to a wedding.

I'd say the latter explanation makes the most sense. But who knows? Maybe it had something to do with hairstyles.

Just remember:  It's

knee-ANDER-tall-insis

[namu]

Hah! Homo sapiens are the living species of SNAFU. It's a wonder we have survived this long.

Not *that* long, compared to pretty much any other species. They'll probably need some external help to go extinct. You know, them lazy monkeys won't even do this right by themselves.

[Irreverend Hugh, KSC]

Hah! Homo sapiens are the living species of SNAFU. It's a wonder we have survived this long.

Not *that* long, compared to pretty much any other species. They'll probably need some external help to go extinct. You know, them lazy monkeys won't even do this right by themselves.

Bobdamned monkeys and their monkey business!

[Bella]

::shakes her fist at the bobdamned monkeys::

[Irreverend Hugh, KSC]

::shakes her fist at the bobdamned monkeys::

It's time for the squirrels to take over!

[Rupert Giles]

This message brought to you by the Commitee for Obfuscation.

Artwork shamelessly stolen.

[Irreverend Hugh, KSC]

Nah! It only encourages THEM.

[~~~~Closed~~~~]

theif...

[Irreverend Hugh, KSC]

theif...

sheik

[Bella]

Whacko!

[Irreverend Hugh, KSC]

Whacko!

Discordian!