FUCKING ORANGE EATING CONTEST

[The Wizard Joseph]

Say goodbye to your lower intestine

I will when my soul exits stage left.

BUT I'M NOT DEAD YET!!

[Cain]

Say goodbye to your lower intestine

I will when my soul exits stage left.

BUT I'M NOT DEAD YET!!

Your soul will no doubt exit your body alongside your bowels and a copious amount of blood.

Cain,
has seen this sort of thing before

[The Wizard Joseph]

Say goodbye to your lower intestine

I will when my soul exits stage left.

BUT I'M NOT DEAD YET!!

Your soul will no doubt exit your body alongside your bowels and a copious amount of blood.

Cain,
has seen this sort of thing before

Well if you have sincere concern for me I appreciate it. I don't intend to fuck myself up and believe I have a workable gastric techne in mind. It's likely to ease the acid and fiberous factors but the trade-off will likely be... olfactory. If I see blood in either puke or feces I will stop. If it persists I'll go to a hospital.


BUT SUCH CONSIDERATIONS ARE NOT HOW A JOB BEGINS!! I WILL EAT ORANGES AMD SHIT SOLID GOLD THAT WILL WITHSTAND THE TEST OF ETERNITY!!!

[The Wizard Joseph]

Came to chill with some of my friends and told them what's going down, as it were. They believe in me and just so happened to have a very suspicious looking organic orange and gave it to me in approval. This one doesn't count. I begin my countdown at midnight Central time. About 2 hours from now. On my way home I shall pick up the oranges. On a scouting mission this morning I discovered that oranges, seedless navels, are on sale!  I brought some in to work and gave them away to my co-workers explaining that a friend had suffered a tragic death. They're well used to my oddities and some sincerely expressed their sympathies.

The oranges are reportedly nice and sweet.  Excellent. I brought 5 bags and they ate all of them. Circumstances are favorable for my task.


Supply acquired, and there's nobody in heaven and earth that can or will stop me.


THIS ONE IS JUST MY FIRST AS A WARM UP.

There will be pics as needed for proof.

[The Wizard Joseph]

Well it's been a good night. I bought THREE WHOLE BAGS

THAT'S 36 BEAUTIFUL, SEEDLESS AND DELICIOUS INDIVIDUAL PIECES OF GLORY AND I'VE ALREADY CONSUMED 6!

THAT'S 6 MOTHERFUCKERS EATEN BY 2AM AND A HAVE 18 HRS TO GO!!! I'M ALREADY PASSING THEM SMOOTH AS FUCK!!! WHAT WAS ALL THIS FUSS ABOUT?! I'M GONNA EAT 6 MORE AND GET A FEW HOURS OF SLEEP!! THAT TOTAL WILL BE 12 BEFORE I COME BACK AFTER I WAKE UP!!!!!


The smell isn't so bad yet, but this is including what I had for supper before midnight. The 2 small containers of Oikos "triple zero" Greek yoghurt I had with them did the trick. I'll have to up the ante...


I THINK I'LL MAKE IT 8 MORE BEFORE I SNORE!!!!!!!!
That's going to be 14 before half the day passes.

[Vanadium Gryllz]

RIP in pieces

[Trivial]

The vitamin C will  make up for it I'm sure.

[Q. G. Pennyworth]

The first orange is away.

This is delicious, I regret nothing. Pics forthcoming once my phone charges.

[Q. G. Pennyworth]

I am halfway orange #3 and it doesn't look like food anymore.

[Cain]

It looks like unprocessed poop, and blood.

Which is a funny coincidence, because...

[Q. G. Pennyworth]

It looks like unprocessed poop, and blood.

Which is a funny coincidence, because...

I am a poop and blood processor?

[Junkenstein]

In about 12-18 hours, depending on quantity and sleeping, yes.

[LMNO]

I really can't believe this is happening again.

Best reboot of Groundhog Day ever.

[Pope Pixie Pickle]

I ate 18 sanguinello blood oranges. Apparently you need bigger oranges to induce intestinal distress. I have notoriously irritable bowels as well.

[Q. G. Pennyworth]

I'm still on orange #5

I'm so hungry and full at the same time. Something smells bad and I don't know if it's me. There's still 12 left just in the first bag.