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I WILL KILL A MOTHERFUCKER.

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Started by The Good Reverend Roger, August 04, 2012, 03:33:09 PM

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The Good Reverend Roger

...I am once again the oldest member of PD.  As such, I demand the respect and veneration that my advanced age merits.  I demand that the white hairs in my beard and scattered around my head receive the proper respect which is their due.  Why, if this was 5 hundred years ago, I would be a marvel of longevity, and my lecherous ways would be excused as eccentricity and not the sort of thing that makes everyone crowd over to the other side of the bus.

I have made my wisdom available; you have not listened.  I have shown great restraint in the way in which I react to your youthful shenanigans, and have beaten hardly anyone with my cane.  And they deserved it.  I'm talking to YOU, Remington. 

Anyways, let's get on with the respecting and the veneration already.  And shut up while you're doing it, because I cannot understand the jibber jabber that comes out of your mouth and is obviously caused by brain damage induced by drugs and the rock and the roll.  Why, in my day, the hardest drug we did was HARD WORK and the rowdiest music we listened to was The Little River Band, and we wore PROPER RESTRAINTS while we listened!

So get off my lawn.  Or, as the British would say, GEROFF MY RUBBISH HEAP. 

Damn kids.

Or Kill Me Again.

" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Anna Mae Bollocks

Scantily-Clad Inspector of Gigantic and Unnecessary Cashews, Texas Division

Juana

I've never even heard of them, old man. :lulz:
"I dispose of obsolete meat machines.  Not because I hate them (I do) and not because they deserve it (they do), but because they are in the way and those older ones don't meet emissions codes.  They emit too much.  You don't like them and I don't like them, so spare me the hysteria."

The Good Reverend Roger

Quote from: Secret Agent GARBO on August 04, 2012, 07:58:58 PM
I've never even heard of them, old man. :lulz:

Of course you haven't.

Just like the phrase "Oh, THAT will happen...when Glenn Miller crawls back out of the channel." wouldn't be funny to you kids, either.

But pull up a chair and let Dirty Old Uncle Roger explain it to you:  The Little River Band was sort of like Air Supply (google it, kid), only even more sappy, and with less talent.  It was the sort of shit we had to experiment with so that you kids today could have REAL music, by learning from our horrible mistakes.

The other day I saw a My Chemical Romance video, and it clued me in to the fact that we WASTED all that SCIENCE, because you fuckers didn't learn ANYTHING from our sacrifice, and in fact have even WORSE TASTE on PURPOSE than we did by ACCIDENT. 

So everybody shut up and turn on your crap iphones or whatever the hell they call them, and listen to your crap music until you LEARN.  And THEN shut up, because I already KNOW.

" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

The Good Reverend Roger

Him.

Dirty Old Uncle Roger = DOUR.  I like that.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

Quote from: The Dead Reverend Roger on August 04, 2012, 03:33:09 PM
...I am once again the oldest member of PD.  As such, I demand the respect and veneration that my advanced age merits.  I demand that the white hairs in my beard and scattered around my head receive the proper respect which is their due.  Why, if this was 5 hundred years ago, I would be a marvel of longevity, and my lecherous ways would be excused as eccentricity and not the sort of thing that makes everyone crowd over to the other side of the bus.

I have made my wisdom available; you have not listened.  I have shown great restraint in the way in which I react to your youthful shenanigans, and have beaten hardly anyone with my cane.  And they deserved it.  I'm talking to YOU, Remington. 

Anyways, let's get on with the respecting and the veneration already.  And shut up while you're doing it, because I cannot understand the jibber jabber that comes out of your mouth and is obviously caused by brain damage induced by drugs and the rock and the roll.  Why, in my day, the hardest drug we did was HARD WORK and the rowdiest music we listened to was The Little River Band, and we wore PROPER RESTRAINTS while we listened!

So get off my lawn.  Or, as the British would say, GEROFF MY RUBBISH HEAP. 

Damn kids.

Or Kill Me Again.

:lulz: :lulz: :lulz:
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."


Anna Mae Bollocks

The Doobie Brothers sucked goat penis once they started making money, too.
Scantily-Clad Inspector of Gigantic and Unnecessary Cashews, Texas Division

The Good Reverend Roger

Quote from: TEXAS FAIRIES FOR ALL YOU SPAGS on August 04, 2012, 08:36:32 PM
The Doobie Brothers sucked goat penis once they started making money gestating, too.

Fixed that for you.

No charge.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

I hate to break it to you, but you MIGHT not be the oldest member of PD. Of course, I can't remember exactly how old you are, but that E.O.T. chap is at the very least giving you a run for your money.

Also, I am in favor of changing your name to Dirty Old Uncle Roger. As my white hair grows in, I've been embracing my inner Uncle Nigel.

You could also go with Dirty Uncle Roger, which gives you DUR, of which I have a high amount of envy.
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."


Anna Mae Bollocks

Quote from: The Dead Reverend Roger on August 04, 2012, 08:38:10 PM
Quote from: TEXAS FAIRIES FOR ALL YOU SPAGS on August 04, 2012, 08:36:32 PM
The Doobie Brothers sucked goat penis once they started making money gestating, too.

Fixed that for you.

No charge.

Very generous of you.  :lulz:
Scantily-Clad Inspector of Gigantic and Unnecessary Cashews, Texas Division

The Good Reverend Roger

Quote from: PROFOUNDLY RETARDED CHARLIE MANSON on August 04, 2012, 08:40:31 PM
I hate to break it to you, but you MIGHT not be the oldest member of PD. Of course, I can't remember exactly how old you are, but that E.O.T. chap is at the very least giving you a run for your money.

Also, I am in favor of changing your name to Dirty Old Uncle Roger. As my white hair grows in, I've been embracing my inner Uncle Nigel.

You could also go with Dirty Uncle Roger, which gives you DUR, of which I have a high amount of envy.

1.  I will be 44 on Halloween.

2.  On it.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

The Good Reverend Roger

" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Anna Mae Bollocks

Quote from: PROFOUNDLY RETARDED CHARLIE MANSON on August 04, 2012, 08:40:31 PM
I hate to break it to you, but you MIGHT not be the oldest member of PD. Of course, I can't remember exactly how old you are, but that E.O.T. chap is at the very least giving you a run for your money.

Also, I am in favor of changing your name to Dirty Old Uncle Roger. As my white hair grows in, I've been embracing my inner Uncle Nigel.

You could also go with Dirty Uncle Roger, which gives you DUR, of which I have a high amount of envy.

Are we talking about older in the chronological sense, or old in the sense of "SEEN THIS SHIT 1000 TIMES ALREADY"?
Scantily-Clad Inspector of Gigantic and Unnecessary Cashews, Texas Division

The Good Reverend Roger

And as far as being old, there was a fly in my office about a minute ago.  You know, house flies, fast little bastards, right?  Obviously too fast for an old bastard like me, right?  RIGHT RIGHT RIGHT?

It landed on my nose.  So I moved in ninja-like fashion to grab it off my nose and crush it.

I now have a mildly bloody nose, and I poked myself in the eye.  And the fly?

I missed that fucking fly by a mile.

So, yeah.  Old.  And DUMB.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Anna Mae Bollocks

Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on August 04, 2012, 08:45:16 PM
And as far as being old, there was a fly in my office about a minute ago.  You know, house flies, fast little bastards, right?  Obviously too fast for an old bastard like me, right?  RIGHT RIGHT RIGHT?

It landed on my nose.  So I moved in ninja-like fashion to grab it off my nose and crush it.

I now have a mildly bloody nose, and I poked myself in the eye.  And the fly?

I missed that fucking fly by a mile.

So, yeah.  Old.  And DUMB.

The secret of killing flies is to come from their blind spot, which is directly above them.
I don't know anybody who can manage that on their nose. I don't think Bruce Lee could do it.
Scantily-Clad Inspector of Gigantic and Unnecessary Cashews, Texas Division