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All Right, Assholes, it's PENANCE TIME.

Started by The Good Reverend Roger, December 06, 2012, 04:20:47 PM

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The Good Reverend Roger

#16
December 06, 2012, 07:19:49 PM
Quote from: Junkenstein on December 06, 2012, 07:18:28 PM
I spent the entire day in an open plan office reading through the past week of FARK. I'm not even sorry.

I've spent the past week calling an obnoxious Auditor "Bilbo". He is paying me for this privilege. 

I spent my lunch hitting a car with a crowbar.

THREAD IS FOR SINS.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Junkenstein

#17
December 06, 2012, 07:20:59 PM
OR LACK THEREOF.

YOU MISERABLE BASTARD!
Nine naked Men just walking down the road will cause a heap of trouble for all concerned.

The Good Reverend Roger

#18
December 06, 2012, 07:21:32 PM
Quote from: Junkenstein on December 06, 2012, 07:20:59 PM
OR LACK THEREOF.

YOU MISERABLE BASTARD!

GIVE ME A SIN TO ABSOLVE OR I'LL SHOW YOU A THING OR TWO.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Don Coyote

#19
December 06, 2012, 07:23:54 PM
OH GREAT AND HAIRIVLE TYRANT I FORGIVE YOUR FOR MY SINS NOW I BESEECH EAT THOU TO  PENANACIFATE ME. I HAVE INDULGED IN HIPSTERISM BEHAVIOR. I HAVE WRITTEN PAPERS THAT INVOLVE IRONY AND DANGEROUS AMOUNTS OF META. I HAVE NOT TROLLELLED MY AMERICAN HISTORY CLASS.

Junkenstein

#20
December 06, 2012, 07:24:08 PM
To give you a sin, I'd have to be sorry.


Have you seen the people round here? Fuck 'em. They deserve it and worse. I'm doing the good work reverend I'm sure of it.
Nine naked Men just walking down the road will cause a heap of trouble for all concerned.

The Good Reverend Roger

#21
December 06, 2012, 07:25:12 PM
Quote from: H0list on December 06, 2012, 07:23:54 PM
OH GREAT AND HAIRIVLE TYRANT I FORGIVE YOUR FOR MY SINS NOW I BESEECH EAT THOU TO  PENANACIFATE ME. I HAVE INDULGED IN HIPSTERISM BEHAVIOR. I HAVE WRITTEN PAPERS THAT INVOLVE IRONY AND DANGEROUS AMOUNTS OF META. I HAVE NOT TROLLELLED MY AMERICAN HISTORY CLASS.

You will bring up the "Phillipine-American War"  (Wiki/google it.  Bring a barf bag) in your history class, right after the most jingoistic member of the class gets done smarming.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

The Good Reverend Roger

#22
December 06, 2012, 07:25:48 PM
Quote from: Junkenstein on December 06, 2012, 07:24:08 PM
To give you a sin, I'd have to be sorry.


Have you seen the people round here? Fuck 'em. They deserve it and worse. I'm doing the good work reverend I'm sure of it.

Yes, which is why I'm telling you to CHANGE THE SUBJECT and talk about BAD SHIT you did.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

P3nT4gR4m

#23
December 06, 2012, 07:27:32 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on December 06, 2012, 07:12:17 PM
Quote from: P3nT4gR4m on December 06, 2012, 07:08:56 PM
BLESS ME FUHRER FOR I HAZ SINNED!

It's been my whole life since my last confession (perhaps even longer - I wasn't there)

DO NOT MAKE THE CONFESSOR LAUGH.  :crankey:

QuoteI've had impure thoughts. Exclusively. I have no intention of changing this anytime soon.
I have lusted. Again, pretty much constantly, ever since my junk started getting fuzzy.
I have nicked stuff, often when legal means of acquisition would have been less hassle. Just as a matter of principle.
I have borne false witness.
I have taken pretty much everyone's name in vain.
I've checked off most of the deadly sins, on a daily basis, except the thing with the ox, which I'm planning on getting round to but, y'know, gloth and sluttony...

I await my penance with a raging hardon, in the back of a stolen Audi, snorting coke off a strippers ass and singing the national anthem, backwards

For what?  That's an exemplary life right there.

Have you perchance prank-called Maggie Thatcher?

Well, when I said "I await my penance" what I actually meant was "I'm close to blacking out"

Prank called Thatcher? I'll go one better. I was Thatcher, for about two years, as a result of a drunken coup, which was the culmination of my cousins stag week and seemed like a good idea at the time. We felt guilty after a while and let her out the basement and returned her wig. She never mentioned it on account of we still have the video of what she did with the St Bernard. Of her own volition, I might add. The look on that dogs face will haunt me til the day I've drank enough to forget.

Remember when Britain and the US were getting all cosy when Maggie and Reagan were spending a lot of time together? Yeah, well, all I'm saying is - I still have those Y-fronts  :wink:

I'm up to my arse in Brexit Numpties, but I want more.  Target-rich environments are the new sexy.
Not actually a meat product.
Ass-Kicking & Foot-Stomping Ancient Master of SHIT FUCK FUCK FUCK
Awful and Bent Behemothic Results of Last Night's Painful Squat.
High Altitude Haggis-Filled Sex Bucket From Beyond Time and Space.
Internet Monkey Person of Filthy and Immoral Pygmy-Porn Wart Contagion
Octomom Auxillary Heat Exchanger Repairman
walking the fine line line between genius and batshit fucking crazy

"computation is a pattern in the spacetime arrangement of particles, and it's not the particles but the pattern that really matters! Matter doesn't matter." -- Max Tegmark

Don Coyote

#24
December 06, 2012, 07:29:49 PM Last Edit: December 06, 2012, 07:32:03 PM by H0list
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on December 06, 2012, 07:25:12 PM
Quote from: H0list on December 06, 2012, 07:23:54 PM
OH GREAT AND HAIRIVLE TYRANT I FORGIVE YOUR FOR MY SINS NOW I BESEECH EAT THOU TO  PENANACIFATE ME. I HAVE INDULGED IN HIPSTERISM BEHAVIOR. I HAVE WRITTEN PAPERS THAT INVOLVE IRONY AND DANGEROUS AMOUNTS OF META. I HAVE NOT TROLLELLED MY AMERICAN HISTORY CLASS.

You will bring up the "Phillipine-American War"  (Wiki/google it.  Bring a barf bag) in your history class, right after the most jingoistic member of the class gets done smarming.

CLAS IS OVER. NO MORE HISTORY FOR ME. EVER EVER AGAIN.

There also were no jingos in my class.

Junkenstein

#25
December 06, 2012, 07:32:58 PM
I was just here for the penance really. What does a guy have to do to get some good old time hosewhipping in the streets with bells and placards handed out?

I held up my end. Get to it.

I'm expecting some BIBLICAL shit. None of the naughty step bullshit give me an old testament smiting now
Nine naked Men just walking down the road will cause a heap of trouble for all concerned.

The Good Reverend Roger

#26
December 06, 2012, 07:33:21 PM
Quote from: H0list on December 06, 2012, 07:29:49 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on December 06, 2012, 07:25:12 PM
Quote from: H0list on December 06, 2012, 07:23:54 PM
OH GREAT AND HAIRIVLE TYRANT I FORGIVE YOUR FOR MY SINS NOW I BESEECH EAT THOU TO  PENANACIFATE ME. I HAVE INDULGED IN HIPSTERISM BEHAVIOR. I HAVE WRITTEN PAPERS THAT INVOLVE IRONY AND DANGEROUS AMOUNTS OF META. I HAVE NOT TROLLELLED MY AMERICAN HISTORY CLASS.

You will bring up the "Phillipine-American War"  (Wiki/google it.  Bring a barf bag) in your history class, right after the most jingoistic member of the class gets done smarming.

CLAS IS OVER. NO MORE HISTORY FOR ME. EVER EVER AGAIN.

There also were no jingos in my class.

Oh.  Then you're fucked.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

The Good Reverend Roger

#27
December 06, 2012, 07:34:02 PM
Quote from: Junkenstein on December 06, 2012, 07:32:58 PM
I was just here for the penance really. What does a guy have to do to get some good old time hosewhipping in the streets with bells and placards handed out?

I held up my end. Get to it.

I'm expecting some BIBLICAL shit. None of the naughty step bullshit give me an old testament smiting now

You will duel holist (the real one) to the DEATH, using nothing but passive-aggressive behavior.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Junkenstein

#28
December 06, 2012, 07:38:12 PM
I accept.


I'm going to be so passive-aggressive, I'm not even going to look at the pathetic shitbag.

Reverend, please inform Holist I'm not talking to him. Her. It. Whatever.
Nine naked Men just walking down the road will cause a heap of trouble for all concerned.

The Good Reverend Roger

#29
December 06, 2012, 07:39:12 PM
Quote from: Junkenstein on December 06, 2012, 07:38:12 PM
I accept.


I'm going to be so passive, I'm not even going to look at the pathetic shitbag.

You need to use the other stuff, too?
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.
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