Author Topic: Who's Who on PD.com  (Read 42845 times)

The Good Reverend Roger

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Re: Who's Who on PD.com
« Reply #240 on: July 12, 2017, 04:52:50 am »
And garrison isnt on it anymore, which is a shame. Except for his singing. Dont miss that a bit.
Im now 39 and divorced, so i guess mid life hits square.
Still not as old as tgrr though. :D

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- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Goddess Eris

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Who's Who on PD.com
« Reply #241 on: June 08, 2018, 08:29:51 pm »
« Last Edit: June 09, 2018, 04:14:48 am by Goddess Eris »

Hoopla!

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Re: Who's Who on PD.com
« Reply #242 on: August 27, 2018, 11:57:21 pm »
PD's Criminal Element and Other Unsavory Characters

Hoopla
Picture:  No known photographs exist.
AKA:  The Baron

Hoopla is a porn adjuster in Toronto.  It's a little known field, but a crucial one, at least to Some People.  What he does bears a little explanation.

Suppose you're driving to work, and you have a pornography.  You're okay, but the other driver is a mess.  Both vehicles are hopelessy tangled together, still making odd noises.  The police stand around weeping and gnashing their teeth in rage because there's nothing they can charge you with.  50 years ago, you would have been fucking NICKED, my son, but this is a more enlightened time, you see.

You've already called your agent, and due to the extreme nature of the pornography, they say they're sending an adjuster out to look things over on the spot.  Afraid?  You should be. 

10 minutes later, a Smartcar pulls up, and an enormous bald freak unfolds out of it like a time-lapse flim of a prolapse.  Your brain locks with fear.  The man walks up and looks over the pornography.  "Yep", he says, "This definitely needs the air brush."

Your family never hears from you again.

Net
Photo:  Pending
AKA: The White Weasel, Frank Luke, Ron Jeremy

Net is an action hero.  He saves the children, in 30 minutes minus this little word from our sponsors.  Net is faster than a speeding building.  He can jump over bullets with a single bound.  He was a member of the JLA, but there was this little accident, see, where the Invisible Man was doing Wonder Woman on the roof.  Net got a little anxious...He couldn't see the Invisible Man, of course, and he mistook Wonder Woman's flailing as a sort of a "come hither" thing.  Net isn't a man to waste time, so he flew down there at the speed of sound and got busy.  Still not seeing the Invisible Man.  Who is expected to fully recover in due time.

Telarus
Photo:  Pending
AKA:  No known aliases.

Telarus is a tractor porn fiend from Hawaii.  Having been asked to leave, he settled in Portland, where his vices are not considered too spectacular.  By day, he is a mild-mannered barista with a Brad Pitt hat and a sweater vest...But by night, he is TELARUS, KING OF THE PAINT HUFFERS.  His people follow him fanatically for reasons unknown, and do whatever he says.  WHATEVER he says.  He himself does not huff paint.  No.  His urges are stronger and more atavistic.  He is a bestial man, and nobody walks the streets at night.  At least not twice.

His turn ons include Pavarati and tulip cultivation.  His turn offs include vice detectives and the Comstock Act.

“a Smartcar pulls up, and an enormous bald freak unfolds out of it like a time-lapse flim of a prolapse.”

That’s poetry.
“Soon all of us will have special names” — Professor Brian O’Blivion

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Doktor Howl

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Re: Who's Who on PD.com
« Reply #243 on: August 28, 2018, 01:25:11 am »
PD's Criminal Element and Other Unsavory Characters

Hoopla
Picture:  No known photographs exist.
AKA:  The Baron

Hoopla is a porn adjuster in Toronto.  It's a little known field, but a crucial one, at least to Some People.  What he does bears a little explanation.

Suppose you're driving to work, and you have a pornography.  You're okay, but the other driver is a mess.  Both vehicles are hopelessy tangled together, still making odd noises.  The police stand around weeping and gnashing their teeth in rage because there's nothing they can charge you with.  50 years ago, you would have been fucking NICKED, my son, but this is a more enlightened time, you see.

You've already called your agent, and due to the extreme nature of the pornography, they say they're sending an adjuster out to look things over on the spot.  Afraid?  You should be. 

10 minutes later, a Smartcar pulls up, and an enormous bald freak unfolds out of it like a time-lapse flim of a prolapse.  Your brain locks with fear.  The man walks up and looks over the pornography.  "Yep", he says, "This definitely needs the air brush."

Your family never hears from you again.

Net
Photo:  Pending
AKA: The White Weasel, Frank Luke, Ron Jeremy

Net is an action hero.  He saves the children, in 30 minutes minus this little word from our sponsors.  Net is faster than a speeding building.  He can jump over bullets with a single bound.  He was a member of the JLA, but there was this little accident, see, where the Invisible Man was doing Wonder Woman on the roof.  Net got a little anxious...He couldn't see the Invisible Man, of course, and he mistook Wonder Woman's flailing as a sort of a "come hither" thing.  Net isn't a man to waste time, so he flew down there at the speed of sound and got busy.  Still not seeing the Invisible Man.  Who is expected to fully recover in due time.

Telarus
Photo:  Pending
AKA:  No known aliases.

Telarus is a tractor porn fiend from Hawaii.  Having been asked to leave, he settled in Portland, where his vices are not considered too spectacular.  By day, he is a mild-mannered barista with a Brad Pitt hat and a sweater vest...But by night, he is TELARUS, KING OF THE PAINT HUFFERS.  His people follow him fanatically for reasons unknown, and do whatever he says.  WHATEVER he says.  He himself does not huff paint.  No.  His urges are stronger and more atavistic.  He is a bestial man, and nobody walks the streets at night.  At least not twice.

His turn ons include Pavarati and tulip cultivation.  His turn offs include vice detectives and the Comstock Act.

“a Smartcar pulls up, and an enormous bald freak unfolds out of it like a time-lapse flim of a prolapse.”

That’s poetry.

I write the world I want to live in.   :lulz:
Well, that's hardly my fault.  I was just doing what I do, doing my little dance, singing my little song, you know?  And then Hirley0 got on the dance floor and said

SHAKE THAT
First ^  Then V

And I did.  I didn't feel like I had any choice.  Between P-Funk and Hirley0, I became the man reptillian menace I am today.

Bootsy Collins did this to me.

Capeditiea

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Re: Who's Who on PD.com
« Reply #244 on: September 02, 2018, 05:12:05 pm »
...i wonder if i will get a part in Dok's world. :D
The Goddess of Discord = 67 = Eris Kallisti Discordja = 67 = Gnosis Goddess of Art and Creativity = 67 = Capeditiea = 67 = Goddess of Enigma
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It was fucking horrible.  Do not trust your younger self.

Doktor Howl

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Re: Who's Who on PD.com
« Reply #245 on: September 02, 2018, 10:08:50 pm »
...i wonder if i will get a part in Dok's world. :D

I suppose I should do some more.

Perhaps later tonight.
Well, that's hardly my fault.  I was just doing what I do, doing my little dance, singing my little song, you know?  And then Hirley0 got on the dance floor and said

SHAKE THAT
First ^  Then V

And I did.  I didn't feel like I had any choice.  Between P-Funk and Hirley0, I became the man reptillian menace I am today.

Bootsy Collins did this to me.

Doktor Howl

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Re: Who's Who on PD.com
« Reply #246 on: September 03, 2018, 07:31:11 am »
Capeditiea
Picture:  Capeditiea cannot be filmed, for technical reasons.
AKA: The Rabbi

We call Capeditiea "The Rabbi", because she keeps us right with The Law.  No, you will not exceed 299,792,458 m/s in a vacuum.  Yes, you will move forward in time.  You will leave those impossible futures and pasts that never happened alone.  That's just garbage left over from being this close to something as big as the sun.  You warp the mass, you warp the time, and there is nothing that's good for you in all that mess.  It's bad physics.  Sin.  Capeditiea's job is to strip that sin off of you, and given the sheer amount of that sin, she can hardly be blamed if she occasionally strips the real past off of someone.  Someone like you.

But she isn't going to just throw you back out into the world without a past, so she finds a past that's not too egregiously wrong/impossible, and staples it right onto you.  So that's why you're living in a reality where Donald Trump is president and Nazis are running around.  Don't get mad at her, it was the only thing left in the bin.
Well, that's hardly my fault.  I was just doing what I do, doing my little dance, singing my little song, you know?  And then Hirley0 got on the dance floor and said

SHAKE THAT
First ^  Then V

And I did.  I didn't feel like I had any choice.  Between P-Funk and Hirley0, I became the man reptillian menace I am today.

Bootsy Collins did this to me.

Capeditiea

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Re: Who's Who on PD.com
« Reply #247 on: September 03, 2018, 08:25:46 am »
Capeditiea
Picture:  Capeditiea cannot be filmed, for technical reasons.
AKA: The Rabbi

We call Capeditiea "The Rabbi", because she keeps us right with The Law.  No, you will not exceed 299,792,458 m/s in a vacuum.  Yes, you will move forward in time.  You will leave those impossible futures and pasts that never happened alone.  That's just garbage left over from being this close to something as big as the sun.  You warp the mass, you warp the time, and there is nothing that's good for you in all that mess.  It's bad physics.  Sin.  Capeditiea's job is to strip that sin off of you, and given the sheer amount of that sin, she can hardly be blamed if she occasionally strips the real past off of someone.  Someone like you.

But she isn't going to just throw you back out into the world without a past, so she finds a past that's not too egregiously wrong/impossible, and staples it right onto you.  So that's why you're living in a reality where Donald Trump is president and Nazis are running around.  Don't get mad at her, it was the only thing left in the bin.


:O you know me so well. :O
The Goddess of Discord = 67 = Eris Kallisti Discordja = 67 = Gnosis Goddess of Art and Creativity = 67 = Capeditiea = 67 = Goddess of Enigma
[GoN]

It was fucking horrible.  Do not trust your younger self.

Doktor Howl

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Re: Who's Who on PD.com
« Reply #248 on: September 04, 2018, 09:47:43 pm »
Capeditiea
Picture:  Capeditiea cannot be filmed, for technical reasons.
AKA: The Rabbi

We call Capeditiea "The Rabbi", because she keeps us right with The Law.  No, you will not exceed 299,792,458 m/s in a vacuum.  Yes, you will move forward in time.  You will leave those impossible futures and pasts that never happened alone.  That's just garbage left over from being this close to something as big as the sun.  You warp the mass, you warp the time, and there is nothing that's good for you in all that mess.  It's bad physics.  Sin.  Capeditiea's job is to strip that sin off of you, and given the sheer amount of that sin, she can hardly be blamed if she occasionally strips the real past off of someone.  Someone like you.

But she isn't going to just throw you back out into the world without a past, so she finds a past that's not too egregiously wrong/impossible, and staples it right onto you.  So that's why you're living in a reality where Donald Trump is president and Nazis are running around.  Don't get mad at her, it was the only thing left in the bin.


:O you know me so well. :O

I am the last Holy Man™ in this country.  It's my job to know these things.

Well, that's hardly my fault.  I was just doing what I do, doing my little dance, singing my little song, you know?  And then Hirley0 got on the dance floor and said

SHAKE THAT
First ^  Then V

And I did.  I didn't feel like I had any choice.  Between P-Funk and Hirley0, I became the man reptillian menace I am today.

Bootsy Collins did this to me.

Capeditiea

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Re: Who's Who on PD.com
« Reply #249 on: September 05, 2018, 07:50:53 pm »
Capeditiea
Picture:  Capeditiea cannot be filmed, for technical reasons.
AKA: The Rabbi

We call Capeditiea "The Rabbi", because she keeps us right with The Law.  No, you will not exceed 299,792,458 m/s in a vacuum.  Yes, you will move forward in time.  You will leave those impossible futures and pasts that never happened alone.  That's just garbage left over from being this close to something as big as the sun.  You warp the mass, you warp the time, and there is nothing that's good for you in all that mess.  It's bad physics.  Sin.  Capeditiea's job is to strip that sin off of you, and given the sheer amount of that sin, she can hardly be blamed if she occasionally strips the real past off of someone.  Someone like you.

But she isn't going to just throw you back out into the world without a past, so she finds a past that's not too egregiously wrong/impossible, and staples it right onto you.  So that's why you're living in a reality where Donald Trump is president and Nazis are running around.  Don't get mad at her, it was the only thing left in the bin.


:O you know me so well. :O

I am the last Holy Man™ in this country.  It's my job to know these things.

you do a damn well great job at it. :D
The Goddess of Discord = 67 = Eris Kallisti Discordja = 67 = Gnosis Goddess of Art and Creativity = 67 = Capeditiea = 67 = Goddess of Enigma
[GoN]

It was fucking horrible.  Do not trust your younger self.

Fujikoma

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Re: Who's Who on PD.com
« Reply #250 on: September 28, 2018, 07:20:29 am »
Only read this page for now but it seems like you folks are still being creative, I need to catch up on recent happenings before I start trolling again, maybe I won't. Still trying to figure out which thread I say "Well..." (sighs, the stubs out a cig, continuing in a deep, gravely voice) "This is what happened, kid... see, your mom, had a thing for birthday cakes... no, not the good kind, the kind that blow up for no goddamn reason."

*long pause, as he inhales deeply, then coughs a spatter of blood on the dimly lit table*

"You see, Chucky Cheese, he likes his privacy, you dig? And when a few of his establishments go boom, he starts to get paranoid, starts to wonder who to cut... I kin tell ya, kiddo, ya don't want that freak cyborg tryin'a shove a knife up yer ass, seen it happen too many times. What we wanna know is, where's the rest of tha bombs?"

Doktor Howl

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Re: Who's Who on PD.com
« Reply #251 on: September 28, 2018, 04:56:24 pm »
Only read this page for now but it seems like you folks are still being creative, I need to catch up on recent happenings before I start trolling again, maybe I won't.

It won't matter.  The reason the last few of us don't bother posting creative work here anymore, is that poptard-style trolling makes it tiresome.

So just go ahead and go nuts.  This is finally the Discordia you wanted.
Well, that's hardly my fault.  I was just doing what I do, doing my little dance, singing my little song, you know?  And then Hirley0 got on the dance floor and said

SHAKE THAT
First ^  Then V

And I did.  I didn't feel like I had any choice.  Between P-Funk and Hirley0, I became the man reptillian menace I am today.

Bootsy Collins did this to me.

Fujikoma

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Re: Who's Who on PD.com
« Reply #252 on: September 28, 2018, 05:49:07 pm »
Only read this page for now but it seems like you folks are still being creative, I need to catch up on recent happenings before I start trolling again, maybe I won't.

It won't matter.  The reason the last few of us don't bother posting creative work here anymore, is that poptard-style trolling makes it tiresome.

So just go ahead and go nuts.  This is finally the Discordia you wanted.


Oh shit, really? Also, what's a poptard? Sounds delicious. The Discordia I wanted was one where people could have open discussion. I remember you, Doctor, very glad you're still alive, even if you are a dick. I left because some of you were far to easy to poke and get a gush of hatred out of, not because I disliked any of you as a person.

During that time, well, there have been some, significant setbacks and changes. I won a court case, representing myself, the judge was like, "Omg, les ipsa loquitor!"... except, well, it was a disability case I didn't even want to be filing in the first place, but, it doesn't make me a terrible person to have done so. Quite humbled me to have found myself in that situation, zero regrets though, I learned quite a lot from other persons who quite often get demonized.

EDIT: I should have said "fellow persons" instead of "other persons"... alas.

EDIT again: maybe it sounds odd, but I finally felt at home for once, and as usual, fled it before any possibility of persecution because past trauma. It's like, ok, you're crazy and have learning disabilities, finally, someone I have something in common with. Can't form attachments because past trauma turns me into a weeping, shiverring heap constantly and leaves me with anxiety wondering when the other shoe is gonna drop. Lot easier when you don't give a shit about the person that's going to inevitably and horribly betray your trust, which is quite difficult to arrange with any shred of empathy.
« Last Edit: September 28, 2018, 06:12:03 pm by Fujikoma »

Doktor Howl

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Re: Who's Who on PD.com
« Reply #253 on: September 29, 2018, 01:19:26 am »
Only read this page for now but it seems like you folks are still being creative, I need to catch up on recent happenings before I start trolling again, maybe I won't.

It won't matter.  The reason the last few of us don't bother posting creative work here anymore, is that poptard-style trolling makes it tiresome.

So just go ahead and go nuts.  This is finally the Discordia you wanted.


Oh shit, really? Also, what's a poptard? Sounds delicious. The Discordia I wanted was one where people could have open discussion. I remember you, Doctor, very glad you're still alive, even if you are a dick. I left because some of you were far to easy to poke and get a gush of hatred out of, not because I disliked any of you as a person.

During that time, well, there have been some, significant setbacks and changes. I won a court case, representing myself, the judge was like, "Omg, les ipsa loquitor!"... except, well, it was a disability case I didn't even want to be filing in the first place, but, it doesn't make me a terrible person to have done so. Quite humbled me to have found myself in that situation, zero regrets though, I learned quite a lot from other persons who quite often get demonized.

EDIT: I should have said "fellow persons" instead of "other persons"... alas.

EDIT again: maybe it sounds odd, but I finally felt at home for once, and as usual, fled it before any possibility of persecution because past trauma. It's like, ok, you're crazy and have learning disabilities, finally, someone I have something in common with. Can't form attachments because past trauma turns me into a weeping, shiverring heap constantly and leaves me with anxiety wondering when the other shoe is gonna drop. Lot easier when you don't give a shit about the person that's going to inevitably and horribly betray your trust, which is quite difficult to arrange with any shred of empathy.

I will just betray you right now and get rid of the horrible anxiety of waiting for the other shoe to drop.
Well, that's hardly my fault.  I was just doing what I do, doing my little dance, singing my little song, you know?  And then Hirley0 got on the dance floor and said

SHAKE THAT
First ^  Then V

And I did.  I didn't feel like I had any choice.  Between P-Funk and Hirley0, I became the man reptillian menace I am today.

Bootsy Collins did this to me.

Fujikoma

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Re: Who's Who on PD.com
« Reply #254 on: September 29, 2018, 02:39:30 am »
No, you won't. You know how I know? In your shoe, is a small device. I press this button, you get the worst case of restless leg syndrome in the galaxy. You will never sleep again, unless you like dreaming about kung fu movies.

EDIT: I've had a series of rather, interesting learning experiences since we last talked, interesting being a light word, though this isn't really the thread for that.

Second edit: This is for you, Roger, and several others. I dunno if it will appease your wrathful disposition, and frankly, I tried, so I shouldn't care, except I do.

https://www.principiadiscordia.com/forum/index.php/topic,38487.0.html
« Last Edit: September 29, 2018, 04:45:45 am by Fujikoma »