Author Topic: Open Bar: Drinks are on the Supreme Court  (Read 81242 times)

The Wizard Joseph

  • Totes into Thoth and Thelema, but these thots still won't fuck me.
  • Deserved It
  • ****
  • Posts: 3710
  • Product of Wisconsin
    • View Profile
Re: Open Bar: Drinks are on the Supreme Court
« Reply #870 on: July 20, 2019, 03:41:07 am »
Hell yeah nullified! Go chase Your Destiny and be all you can!

You can't get out backward.  You have to go forward to go back.. better press on! - Willie Wonka, PBUH

Life can be seen as a game with no reset button, no extra lives, and if the power goes out there is no restarting.  If that's all you see life as you are not long for this world, and never will get it.

"Ayn Rand never swung a hammer in her life and had serious dominance issues" - The Fountainhead

"World domination is such an ugly phrase. I prefer to call it world optimisation."
 - Harry Potter and the Methods of Rationality :lulz:

"You program the controller to do the thing, only it doesn't do the thing.  It does something else entirely, or nothing at all.  It's like voting."
- Billy, Aug 21st, 2019

Juana

  • Hideous and Otherworldly Attack Duckling of DESPAIR
  • Deserved It
  • ****
  • Posts: 5305
    • View Profile
Re: Open Bar: Drinks are on the Supreme Court
« Reply #871 on: July 21, 2019, 12:02:52 am »
!!!!!!!! Awesome news, Null!
"I dispose of obsolete meat machines.  Not because I hate them (I do) and not because they deserve it (they do), but because they are in the way and those older ones don't meet emissions codes.  They emit too much.  You don't like them and I don't like them, so spare me the hysteria."

chaotic neutral observer

  • not a real discordian
  • Outlandish
  • ***
  • Posts: 580
  • I saw what you did and I'm okay with it
    • View Profile
Re: Open Bar: Drinks are on the Supreme Court
« Reply #872 on: July 21, 2019, 02:02:06 am »
Congratulations!  Good luck!

“having access to the company yacht”

Don't you dare turn yup on me.
"When I say 'engineering', I have unreasonable expectations.  It must - as you know - look good in PADS AND give you plenty of help ducking and weaving in meetings.  But it must also, at some distant point in time, function.  If it does not, then you must accept that you are not in fact an engineer but instead an MBA.  Hang your head in SHAME, sinner!"

nullified

  • A Pile of Soggy Bird Carcasses
  • Deserved It
  • ****
  • Posts: 1118
  • I WILL EXILE VIOLATORS TO THE PISS-VOID
    • View Profile
Re: Open Bar: Drinks are on the Supreme Court
« Reply #873 on: July 21, 2019, 02:33:20 am »
I’m way more interested in helping other people than yacht club bullshit. I look at this and I see power I can bring to bear toward solving serious problems. No need to worry about me.
“I am that worst of all type of criminal...I cannot bring myself to do what you tell me, because you told me.”

Nephew Twiddleton

  • Deserved It
  • ****
  • Posts: 20451
  • DEATH METAL ENGLISH
    • View Profile
Re: Open Bar: Drinks are on the Supreme Court
« Reply #874 on: July 21, 2019, 07:14:44 pm »
Hold on a minute here, I have a fucking TALE TO TELL YOU.

I’m ripping this from the email I wrote to a wonderful lady in Michigan who helps no-hopers like me find work, and asked me to keep her looped in after I got to Boston.

Ahem.



So! The precise moment I changed over all of my information to point to Boston on ZipRecruiter and Monster, I had recruiters doing the stalker heavy breathing thing over my shoulder. Literally, all over me like sand on a beach. I’m hardly exaggerating here: four job offers before I could even place a search, seven more after I finally got a search typed in.

I had between fifteen and twenty phone calls a day from recruiters, I could barely do so much as wash my hands without missing a call. In fact, I missed a call while in an interview, missed another call from the same person in that same interview, and missed five texts from the same person in the same interview. This interview took fifteen minutes.

From that initial 4, one in particular was a huge stretch. People in fancy suits and such turning up to apply, giant company doing outsourced direct marketing campaign work for Fortune 100 companies. Enter me, dressed in the usual hoodie, jeans, t-shirt, sweating like a pig, lugging two giant bags like a hobo, panting like a dog. Minimal work history in an old, old field. No qualifications at all.

Absolutely ridiculous that I’d even bother wasting their time, yeah? I mean, I was seeing other offers in the minimum wage range, doing cold lead sales and call center tech support. That’s definitely my speed: low-level consumer-facing punishment-detail type work. This though? This is big time: folks with expensive suits purpose designed to intimidate the Morlocks of blue collar land, and cars that sound like they belong on a Formula One track and look like spaceships. People who fly out of the country twice a week and cannot imagine a bank account with less than five figures in it. (That would be “flat broke” to such rarified individuals.) This is way out of my league, right?

Not right. I got into the second round of interviews, which is 1% of the first round of interviews: I was in the top ten applicants. That’s already crazy: all these rich Harvard kids fell below me on the pecking order. So I go in for the second round only slightly nicer (showered, dress shirt, only one bag). And apparently ace the interview hard.

So then they immediately rushed me through the third round of interviews, which is top five applicants out of over 1000 applicants. So five MORE rich Harvard/MIT students fall out of the running. And I’m still there. Finish that round, go home, and wait for the call.

Call comes up. First they ask me how I thought I did. By this point I’m getting a big ol’ ego boost, so I tell them I think I did amazing, certainly better than the folks who didn’t make it to all three rounds, right? She says yep, you’re right, Brian and Garrett thought you did fantastic. Then the drumroll beings, here comes the reveal. And the winner is... well. Just, bear with me here:

I was in the top 2 or 3 applicants. Out of over 1000.
They recommended me for management fast track.
—Assuming I do the work, this means things like “having access to the company yacht” and “international business trips” inside of two months.
——That’s two months like “late September”. At the outside.
And finally...
Expectation is that I come in to start Monday. As in the day after the day after tomorrow. Probably just “the day after tomorrow” or “today” when you get this, depending on the day.

Well. Uh.

Boston!

That's awesome! Congratulations!
Strange and Terrible Organ Laminator of Yesterday's Heavy Scene
Sentence or sentence fragment pending

Soy El Vaquero Peludo de Oro

TIM AM I, PRIMARY OF THE EXTRA-ATMOSPHERIC SIMIANS

nullified

  • A Pile of Soggy Bird Carcasses
  • Deserved It
  • ****
  • Posts: 1118
  • I WILL EXILE VIOLATORS TO THE PISS-VOID
    • View Profile
Re: Open Bar: Drinks are on the Supreme Court
« Reply #875 on: July 21, 2019, 07:23:55 pm »
Its a weird, cartoonish meteoric rise for me over here. It’s hard to believe that tomorrow I go in to work. But I do! Ten hour days while I’m in training (unpaid training but they know you have to eat) but i hardly care. In fact, I’m going all in. Optional Saturday training and everything. What else am I going to do, play phone games? The structure will help my sleep schedule anyway.
“I am that worst of all type of criminal...I cannot bring myself to do what you tell me, because you told me.”

LMNO

  • Lubricated and Rabid Lungfish of Impending Sexdoom™
  • Deserved It
  • ****
  • Posts: 62354
  • Internet Fuckweasel of Haunted Pork Dimensions.
    • View Profile
    • Earfatigue Productions: When it has to sound like you give a shit.
Re: Open Bar: Drinks are on the Supreme Court
« Reply #876 on: July 22, 2019, 01:15:50 pm »
That's awesome!

Cain

  • Alea iacta est
  • Chekha
  • Deserved It
  • ****
  • Posts: 63225
    • View Profile
Re: Open Bar: Drinks are on the Supreme Court
« Reply #877 on: July 22, 2019, 01:56:21 pm »
Congrats!

PoFP

  • Word-Salad Enthusiast and Terrified Meat Sack
  • Outlandish
  • ***
  • Posts: 919
    • View Profile
Re: Open Bar: Drinks are on the Supreme Court
« Reply #878 on: July 22, 2019, 06:12:15 pm »
Fucking nice, Null! Congrats!

Just had a similar, albeit less elevating and impressive shift in my career as well. It's a bizarre, but satisfying feeling to be chosen over the Edubicated and on-paper-qualified.

Good luck! Even though it sounds like you won't need it.
Listen carefully. I don't have much time, and I only have 462 characters left. I'm a scientist from Area 52 (Area 51 was used to draw attention from Area 52, where the aliens were ACTUALLY stored) who was working on neural interfacing with networked devices. In an experiment gone wrong, I accidentally uploaded my mind to the internet. In the 2 seconds I had before my mind scrambled itself with the world's network traffic, I was able to store this snippet in this random internet signature. If you're reading this, let the world know tha

nullified

  • A Pile of Soggy Bird Carcasses
  • Deserved It
  • ****
  • Posts: 1118
  • I WILL EXILE VIOLATORS TO THE PISS-VOID
    • View Profile
Re: Open Bar: Drinks are on the Supreme Court
« Reply #879 on: July 22, 2019, 06:19:06 pm »
Tail end of our lunch break, it’s been pretty good. Next up is a few hours of madness, door to door sales shit I guess? It’s bound to be demoralizing but I’m basically okay with that. It’s just the first step.
“I am that worst of all type of criminal...I cannot bring myself to do what you tell me, because you told me.”

Q. G. Pennyworth

  • Slimy Thing Who
  • Deserved It
  • ****
  • Posts: 5980
  • QUEEN BITCH OF FLYERS
    • View Profile
Re: Open Bar: Drinks are on the Supreme Court
« Reply #880 on: July 22, 2019, 10:10:53 pm »
No context

Quote
dude, we are living in the strange times
you better learn to fap in the middle of an existential crisis or you're gonna die of semen poisoning

The Wizard Joseph

  • Totes into Thoth and Thelema, but these thots still won't fuck me.
  • Deserved It
  • ****
  • Posts: 3710
  • Product of Wisconsin
    • View Profile
Re: Open Bar: Drinks are on the Supreme Court
« Reply #881 on: July 22, 2019, 10:57:51 pm »
No context

Quote
dude, we are living in the strange times
you better learn to fap in the middle of an existential crisis or you're gonna die of semen poisoning

 :lulz: :lulz:  :lulz:
 :spittake:
And now I have to clean my phone.
You can't get out backward.  You have to go forward to go back.. better press on! - Willie Wonka, PBUH

Life can be seen as a game with no reset button, no extra lives, and if the power goes out there is no restarting.  If that's all you see life as you are not long for this world, and never will get it.

"Ayn Rand never swung a hammer in her life and had serious dominance issues" - The Fountainhead

"World domination is such an ugly phrase. I prefer to call it world optimisation."
 - Harry Potter and the Methods of Rationality :lulz:

"You program the controller to do the thing, only it doesn't do the thing.  It does something else entirely, or nothing at all.  It's like voting."
- Billy, Aug 21st, 2019

nullified

  • A Pile of Soggy Bird Carcasses
  • Deserved It
  • ****
  • Posts: 1118
  • I WILL EXILE VIOLATORS TO THE PISS-VOID
    • View Profile
Re: Open Bar: Drinks are on the Supreme Court
« Reply #882 on: July 23, 2019, 05:23:17 pm »
Today in weird stuff I learned working a thankless door to door sales job while angling for promotion on the management fast track:

The golden apple is also a symbol of Shiva the Destroyer. In fact, it’s an eschatological symbol.
“I am that worst of all type of criminal...I cannot bring myself to do what you tell me, because you told me.”

nullified

  • A Pile of Soggy Bird Carcasses
  • Deserved It
  • ****
  • Posts: 1118
  • I WILL EXILE VIOLATORS TO THE PISS-VOID
    • View Profile
Re: Open Bar: Drinks are on the Supreme Court
« Reply #883 on: July 23, 2019, 06:18:14 pm »
Today in my rollercoaster life:

Fired for having piercings.
“I am that worst of all type of criminal...I cannot bring myself to do what you tell me, because you told me.”

Bruno

  • Rooty Tooty Schadenfreude
  • Deserved It
  • ****
  • Posts: 3829
  • Personal Text
    • View Profile
Re: Open Bar: Drinks are on the Supreme Court
« Reply #884 on: July 23, 2019, 06:25:49 pm »
Well, shit. Did they not notice that when they hired you?
Formerly something else...