I'm starting to think Patrick Henry had it ALL WRONG. Instead of his jabbering, how about "Give me an Ipod or give me death!", or even, "Give me unlimited minutes or KILL ME." Who the fuck wants liberty, anyway? Not Americans. No, that gets messy, and we'd all rather have a Big Mac and decent wifi reception.
Stupid founders. They didn't know how good they had it...The boss lived 2000 miles away, on the other side of the ocean, so they could pretty much do anything they liked AND still call on the redcoats if the Indians got too frisky. So they had to pay extra for tea? Shit, who drinks that swill anyway? Coffee and bourbon are all you need, and there wasn't a tax on either one.
And as far as representation goes, HOW'S THAT BEEN WORKING OUT FOR YOU, AMERICA? Yeah, the voice of the people babbled a bit, and you got the government you deserve. AGAIN. There seems to be some kind of LEARNING DISABILITY inherent in North America.
And who the fuck says that America won the revolution after all? No, that last minute, pull it out your arse "victory" at Yorktown is about as believable as the Warren Commission. They left ON PURPOSE, and NOT just to stick us with 400 years of collected religious nuts they'd unloaded on us. It's an experiment, see...It's been running for 220 years AT LEAST, and that's not even counting the Roanoke business.
So fuck all that shit. Take your "representative government" (HAW HAW) and shove up your 4th point of contact. Give me instead SOME MORE SHIT. I need more gizmos. I MUST HAVE the latest smartphone, so when the NSA listens in on my calls, at least I'll be stylin'. I must have an entire video arcade shoved in my cell phone holder, or MY CIVIL RIGHTS HAVE BEEN VIOLATED.
Give me all that shit, or give me PILLS. Little yellow bastards, that take the edge off of my day (and off of any right angles I see), and make me fucking HOLY™ like in the good old days, when we drank shitty beer, smoked ditchweed, raced cars, and tried to get laid with Susy Rottencrotch under the bleachers on Saturday night.
Because, you fuckers, that's all the "AMERICA" you need, the only proof of which is that you haven't been using THE REST OF IT, ANYFUCKINGWAY!
So just shut up, all of you.
Okay for now,
Dok
The gadgets are necessary, Dok.
How else are you going to get MORE? How else will you show off to everyone how much money you're spending in a shitty economy. Must mean you're rich or something right? Who needs a phone that's just a phone? I can't wait until they get a model out that attaches to the USB port in the back of my skull and does all the thinking for me while I aimlessly go from game to game, all in my head. It will seem like I'm actually in the game. What mind I if they start downloading the contents of my memory? It will make for better advertising. The Machine will always know exactly what I need, even if its a new phone with a couple of new features. The one I have now isn't broken, no. It's just no longer good enough. Somehow, it just doesn't do what it's supposed to anymore.
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on April 17, 2012, 05:32:37 PM
The one I have now isn't broken, no. It's just no longer good enough.
That should replace E Pluribus Unum on our money.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 17, 2012, 05:34:04 PM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on April 17, 2012, 05:32:37 PM
The one I have now isn't broken, no. It's just no longer good enough.
That should replace E Pluribus Unum on our money.
It's true though, no? I used to get funny looks because my phone was obsolete. I didn't know anything about blackberries or anything like that. My phone made phone calls and sent text messages. Now my new one also does the internet in a sort of cruddy way but if I wanted to do something in depth on the internet, that's what my laptop is for. And I only got the new one because I switched carriers, and got the cheapest one there.
It's not only a way to kill our freedom by enslaving us to consumerism, it's also a means to kill our free time. Any spare moment you have the gadget calls to you. You have to have it constantly and fully charged just in case you get an important work email when you're having dinner with the missus. She understands, she's in the same boat. What's the tip for this? I can't do simple math in my head. I'll ask the phone.
We're in a culture where we need the latest new gadget because it's cool and entertaining and makes us eternally available to do work that we don't get paid for since its off the clock.
:lulz: This is some Holy Troof, right here.
Quote from: Nigel on April 17, 2012, 06:12:30 PM
:lulz: This is some Holy Troof, right here.
I posted it as part II over at CG. :lulz:
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 17, 2012, 06:13:01 PM
Quote from: Nigel on April 17, 2012, 06:12:30 PM
:lulz: This is some Holy Troof, right here.
I posted it as part II over at CG. :lulz:
Fuck yeah. :lulz:
My old phone had a memory card so I could store a fuckload of pics in my phone and or download music from my computer and listen through a shitty speaker the size of a gnat's ass or a single earphone.
My new phone is better. Sure, there's no memory card, so I can't store a megaton of pictures on my phone anymore but I can sign up for Muve MusicTM on my service and GET TODAYS HOT ARTISTS LIKE NICKELBACK AND TAYLOR SWIFT and rent cloud drive space to store them on.
AMERICA: KEEPS GETTING BETTER AND BETTER, DAMMIT.
Quote from: Anna Mae Bollocks on April 17, 2012, 07:23:15 PM
My old phone had a memory card so I could store a fuckload of pics in my phone and or download music from my computer and listen through a shitty speaker the size of a gnat's ass or a single earphone.
My new phone is better. Sure, there's no memory card, so I can't store a megaton of pictures on my phone anymore but I can sign up for Muve MusicTM on my service and GET TODAYS HOT ARTISTS LIKE NICKELBACK AND TAYLOR SWIFT and rent cloud drive space to store them on.
AMERICA: KEEPS GETTING BETTER AND BETTER, DAMMIT.
So all those amendments we traded off?
SUCH A DEAL!
Ho! Ho yeah!
There's no way to correct this kind of behavior. Here's the
really bad part.
The US has listed ATT's network as a part of the US infrastructure, making any damage inflicted to ANY equipment pertaining to that network a federal offense.
Couple that with an mobile internet "culture" where checking in every 5 god damned seconds is a social activity. Never do mind about the NSA (whom?), never do mind about market data (bwuh?).
And minutes? No, nobody cares about that at all. Because people don't talk to each other. A phone call is a very intimate form of communication compared with, say, status updates. You hear breath and tone and you can practically taste the glands on the other end. People want OH FUCK HERE IT COMES:
UNLIMITED DATA
HALF OF THEM DON'T UNDERSTAND WHAT "DATA" MEANS IN THAT CONTEXT. THE OTHER HALF
WANT IT.
QuoteWell, what do you do on the internet? What are your regular activities?
I DON'T CARE, I DON'T WANT TO HAVE TO THINK ABOUT IT, I DON'T HAVE TIME TO MONITOR MY USAGE AND YOU KNOW I DON'T LIKE YOUR FACE WHY DON'T YOU JUST GO AND KILL YOURSELF.
Hey did you know about the NSA and warrant-less wiretapping? Did you know you're getting charged double for a service it costs us absolutely zero dollars to provide?
WTF ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? WHY IS MY BILL SO HIGH? BRING BACK UNLIMITED? WHAT ARE THESE FEES? 911? PFSH!!!
Ok, calm down why are you
THIS IS AMERICA AND YOU SHOULDN'T BE ALLOWED TO ROB PEOPLE LIKE THIS IT'S WRONG!
Are familiar with the Bank of Ameri-
STFU! LOWER MY BILL!
Every single day of my life forEVAR.
You are a True American Hero, Alty.
*juts chin*
SOMEBODY MUST DO SOMETHING!
Alty,
The Hero nobody wants ever, even if they think they do.
Very good stuff, Dok and Twid.
People have this idea in their head that once they have
UNLIMITED DATA
is some kind of lost freedom they once had. If only they had
UNLIMITED DATA
they would be able to do all those things that will finally make them happy. The best part is as long as they have
UNLIMITED DATA
they don't have to worry about their weight or their job or their kid or their bills, they'll have
UNLIMITED DATA
and all will be well.
They NEED unlimited data, Alty.
Just like they NEED to sooper-size.
Anything less is for smudgy people in unfurnished countries.
It occurs to me that *I* need UNLIMITED DATA. What's more, I need TOTAL ACCESS. Anything less is a snub to my God-given American right to entitlement. If UNLIMITED DATA and TOTAL ACCESS were cocaine, I'd be out back snorting it off the lid of a dumpster crammed with the bodies of dead hookers, while singing I've Got Rythym, and doing a little dance.
Give me my UNLIMITED DATA, you angry little Hungarian, and things won't have to get ugly.
Alty is on a roll. :lulz:
If the Founders had had UNLIMITED DATA all the problems of America would be fixed. According to this study I read,
Howl, you'll get it when you learn to toe the line!
Cain, was it this one?
QuoteAs recent demands by customers of various telecommunication companies for unlimited data have increased and complaints of capped data usage and "throttling" have increased many of these companies have began to alter their business strategy.
Frank Pent, the PR Director for Discotel Inc., has been utilizing tactics the competition has labeled "bizzare".
"It's simple really, you have to start with a blond. Americans just respond to blondes, we've done studies" Pent leans back in his chair and lights another cigar, his eighth so far. "And you're going to want to interview her thoroughly. Everyone has limits but you're going to have to open-minded. How many guys are too many? Would a trustworthy older female in the room make her more comfortable with trying new things."
While these solutions are viable as far as raw resources go, how do the detractors feel?
"it's ridiculous!" says Vick Dactyl, CEO of Knext Cellular. "If you're going to have a shop full of lunkheads banging some pretty young thing she can't well be picky when it comes to hair pulling. It will never work as a business model, and you can tell him I said that."
With network costs rising as customers demand faster speeds, and larger transfer rates, with lower prices it's unknown just what the telcos will do in the end.
There's something wrong with me maybe.
Perhaps there is, but it's oh so right. :lulz:
Quote from: Alty on April 19, 2012, 08:08:37 PM
Howl, you'll get it when you learn to toe the line!
I am a Good American™. I pay my taxes. I rarely commit felonies. I drive a Jeep. I own guns. I regularly make disparaging comments about Europeans and people from unfurnished countries. I shop at box stores. I throw food away while half the world starves, and laugh about it.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY UNLIMITED DATA?
The Europeans took it.
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 08:52:46 PM
The Europeans took it.
I fucking knew it. And why? You have no use for it.
It's just plain selfishness, I say.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 08:53:44 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 08:52:46 PM
The Europeans took it.
I fucking knew it. And why? You have no use for it.
It's just plain selfishness, I say.
To market Ikea brand Lutefisk and other sordid and immoral products on an unsuspecting and innocent America
TM
Quote from: Guru Coyote on April 19, 2012, 08:55:20 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 08:53:44 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 08:52:46 PM
The Europeans took it.
I fucking knew it. And why? You have no use for it.
It's just plain selfishness, I say.
To market Ikea brand Lutefisk and other sordid and immoral products on an unsuspecting and innocent AmericaTM
They only need SOME data for that. They don't have NEEDS like we Americans™ have. They have wants.
They shouldn't have gotten my UNLIMITED DATA.
:tgrr:
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 08:53:44 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 08:52:46 PM
The Europeans took it.
I fucking knew it. And why? You have no use for it.
It's just plain selfishness, I say.
What Guru Coyote said.
Also, if it's American™, we want
a piece of the pie.
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 08:56:53 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 08:53:44 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 08:52:46 PM
The Europeans took it.
I fucking knew it. And why? You have no use for it.
It's just plain selfishness, I say.
What Guru Coyote said.
Also, if it's American™, we want a piece of the pie.
And after all we've done for you.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 08:57:30 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 08:56:53 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 08:53:44 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 08:52:46 PM
The Europeans took it.
I fucking knew it. And why? You have no use for it.
It's just plain selfishness, I say.
What Guru Coyote said.
Also, if it's American™, we want a piece of the pie.
And after all we've done for you.
You've said it yourself. We are egoistic, communist individualists.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 08:57:30 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 08:56:53 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 08:53:44 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 08:52:46 PM
The Europeans took it.
I fucking knew it. And why? You have no use for it.
It's just plain selfishness, I say.
What Guru Coyote said.
Also, if it's American™, we want a piece of the pie.
And after all we've done for you.
You know Those Filthy Belgians
TMPatent Pending ALL claim that MICKEY MOUSE and DONALD DUCK are theirs. Like they invented them or something.
WITHOUT THAT MOUSE AND DUCK AMERICA
TM HAS NO ECONOMY!!!!!!!
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 08:58:55 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 08:57:30 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 08:56:53 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 08:53:44 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 08:52:46 PM
The Europeans took it.
I fucking knew it. And why? You have no use for it.
It's just plain selfishness, I say.
What Guru Coyote said.
Also, if it's American™, we want a piece of the pie.
And after all we've done for you.
You've said it yourself. We are egoistic, communist individualists.
We gave you McDonalds. Euro Disney. WalMart. We fought some war for you once, when the Japanese invaded you. And THIS is how you repay us?
Quote from: Guru Coyote on April 19, 2012, 08:59:30 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 08:57:30 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 08:56:53 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 08:53:44 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 08:52:46 PM
The Europeans took it.
I fucking knew it. And why? You have no use for it.
It's just plain selfishness, I say.
What Guru Coyote said.
Also, if it's American™, we want a piece of the pie.
And after all we've done for you.
You know Those Filthy BelgiansTMPatent Pending ALL claim that MICKEY MOUSE and DONALD DUCK are theirs. Like they invented them or something.
WITHOUT THAT MOUSE AND DUCK AMERICATM HAS NO ECONOMY!!!!!!!
What has Europe ever done for us?
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 09:01:05 PM
Quote from: Guru Coyote on April 19, 2012, 08:59:30 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 08:57:30 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 08:56:53 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 08:53:44 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 08:52:46 PM
The Europeans took it.
I fucking knew it. And why? You have no use for it.
It's just plain selfishness, I say.
What Guru Coyote said.
Also, if it's American™, we want a piece of the pie.
And after all we've done for you.
You know Those Filthy BelgiansTMPatent Pending ALL claim that MICKEY MOUSE and DONALD DUCK are theirs. Like they invented them or something.
WITHOUT THAT MOUSE AND DUCK AMERICATM HAS NO ECONOMY!!!!!!!
What has Europe ever done for us?
Something something cheese? I do know they inflicted the Beetles on us, but at the sametime Mossleman? Altough I think Mossleman has to be a secret American.
Quote from: Guru Coyote on April 19, 2012, 09:03:13 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 09:01:05 PM
Quote from: Guru Coyote on April 19, 2012, 08:59:30 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 08:57:30 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 08:56:53 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 08:53:44 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 08:52:46 PM
The Europeans took it.
I fucking knew it. And why? You have no use for it.
It's just plain selfishness, I say.
What Guru Coyote said.
Also, if it's American™, we want a piece of the pie.
And after all we've done for you.
You know Those Filthy BelgiansTMPatent Pending ALL claim that MICKEY MOUSE and DONALD DUCK are theirs. Like they invented them or something.
WITHOUT THAT MOUSE AND DUCK AMERICATM HAS NO ECONOMY!!!!!!!
What has Europe ever done for us?
Something something cheese? I do know they inflicted the Beetles on us, but at the sametime Mossleman? Altough I think Mossleman has to be a secret American.
Mosselman is a special case.
And yeah, rock & roll was pretty cool before the British fucked it up.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 09:00:31 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 08:58:55 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 08:57:30 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 08:56:53 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 08:53:44 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 08:52:46 PM
The Europeans took it.
I fucking knew it. And why? You have no use for it.
It's just plain selfishness, I say.
What Guru Coyote said.
Also, if it's American™, we want a piece of the pie.
And after all we've done for you.
You've said it yourself. We are egoistic, communist individualists.
We gave you McDonalds. Euro Disney. WalMart. We fought some war for you once, when the Japanese invaded you. And THIS is how you repay us?
You know we love you for all that, but we want it all. Our Way™. Slow fast-food, pro-semite disney. We don't have walmart in Norway. We even kicked out Lidl.
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 09:06:09 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 09:00:31 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 08:58:55 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 08:57:30 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 08:56:53 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 08:53:44 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 08:52:46 PM
The Europeans took it.
I fucking knew it. And why? You have no use for it.
It's just plain selfishness, I say.
What Guru Coyote said.
Also, if it's American™, we want a piece of the pie.
And after all we've done for you.
You've said it yourself. We are egoistic, communist individualists.
We gave you McDonalds. Euro Disney. WalMart. We fought some war for you once, when the Japanese invaded you. And THIS is how you repay us?
You know we love you for all that, but we want it all. Our Way™. Slow fast-food, pro-semite disney. We don't have walmart in Norway. We even kicked out Lidl.
Who is Lidl? Is she related to Bjork?
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 09:06:09 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 09:00:31 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 08:58:55 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 08:57:30 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 08:56:53 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 08:53:44 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 08:52:46 PM
The Europeans took it.
I fucking knew it. And why? You have no use for it.
It's just plain selfishness, I say.
What Guru Coyote said.
Also, if it's American™, we want a piece of the pie.
And after all we've done for you.
You've said it yourself. We are egoistic, communist individualists.
We gave you McDonalds. Euro Disney. WalMart. We fought some war for you once, when the Japanese invaded you. And THIS is how you repay us?
You know we love you for all that, but we want it all. Our Way™. Slow fast-food, pro-semite disney. We don't have walmart in Norway. We even kicked out Lidl.
And after we saved you from the Vietnamese, you REJECT Walmart?
Fucking communists the lot of you.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 09:06:50 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 09:06:09 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 09:00:31 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 08:58:55 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 08:57:30 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 08:56:53 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 08:53:44 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 08:52:46 PM
The Europeans took it.
I fucking knew it. And why? You have no use for it.
It's just plain selfishness, I say.
What Guru Coyote said.
Also, if it's American™, we want a piece of the pie.
And after all we've done for you.
You've said it yourself. We are egoistic, communist individualists.
We gave you McDonalds. Euro Disney. WalMart. We fought some war for you once, when the Japanese invaded you. And THIS is how you repay us?
You know we love you for all that, but we want it all. Our Way™. Slow fast-food, pro-semite disney. We don't have walmart in Norway. We even kicked out Lidl.
Who is Lidl? Is she related to Bjork?
Walmart, Nazi-style.
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 09:12:22 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 09:06:50 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 09:06:09 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 09:00:31 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 08:58:55 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 08:57:30 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 08:56:53 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 08:53:44 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 08:52:46 PM
The Europeans took it.
I fucking knew it. And why? You have no use for it.
It's just plain selfishness, I say.
What Guru Coyote said.
Also, if it's American™, we want a piece of the pie.
And after all we've done for you.
You've said it yourself. We are egoistic, communist individualists.
We gave you McDonalds. Euro Disney. WalMart. We fought some war for you once, when the Japanese invaded you. And THIS is how you repay us?
You know we love you for all that, but we want it all. Our Way™. Slow fast-food, pro-semite disney. We don't have walmart in Norway. We even kicked out Lidl.
Who is Lidl? Is she related to Bjork?
Walmart, Nazi-style.
WalMart IS Nazi-style. :lulz:
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 09:13:37 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 09:12:22 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 09:06:50 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 09:06:09 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 09:00:31 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 08:58:55 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 08:57:30 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 08:56:53 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 08:53:44 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 08:52:46 PM
The Europeans took it.
I fucking knew it. And why? You have no use for it.
It's just plain selfishness, I say.
What Guru Coyote said.
Also, if it's American™, we want a piece of the pie.
And after all we've done for you.
You've said it yourself. We are egoistic, communist individualists.
We gave you McDonalds. Euro Disney. WalMart. We fought some war for you once, when the Japanese invaded you. And THIS is how you repay us?
You know we love you for all that, but we want it all. Our Way™. Slow fast-food, pro-semite disney. We don't have walmart in Norway. We even kicked out Lidl.
Who is Lidl? Is she related to Bjork?
Walmart, Nazi-style.
WalMart IS Nazi-style. :lulz:
:lulz:
But Walmart ain't German!
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 09:16:23 PM
But Walmart ain't German!
Neither are most Nazis, these days. :lulz:
On the other hand, we're up to our assholes in 'em.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 08:56:29 PM
Quote from: Guru Coyote on April 19, 2012, 08:55:20 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 08:53:44 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 08:52:46 PM
The Europeans took it.
I fucking knew it. And why? You have no use for it.
It's just plain selfishness, I say.
To market Ikea brand Lutefisk and other sordid and immoral products on an unsuspecting and innocent AmericaTM
They only need SOME data for that. They don't have NEEDS like we Americans™ have. They have wants.
They shouldn't have gotten my UNLIMITED DATA.
:tgrr:
No European is willing to admit this but ... we needed your UNLIMITED DATA to pull off that Wikileaks stunt.
That's how you can tell we took it, instead of making our own. It was all
American data.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 09:06:50 PM
Who is Lidl? Is she related to Bjork?
:lulz:
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 09:18:56 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 09:17:59 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 09:17:09 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 09:16:23 PM
But Walmart ain't German!
On the other hand, we're up to our assholes in 'em.
Germans or Nazis? Both?
Um, I answered that in the part of my post you didn't quote.
Oh yeah. We Europeans aren't as smart as we look you know.
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 09:50:07 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 09:18:56 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 09:17:59 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 09:17:09 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 09:16:23 PM
But Walmart ain't German!
On the other hand, we're up to our assholes in 'em.
Germans or Nazis? Both?
Um, I answered that in the part of my post you didn't quote.
Oh yeah. We Europeans aren't as smart as we look you know.
Oh, but you are. You can't fool me with your brains and your "educations" (spit).
I hear Japan has UNLIMITED DATA.
For purposes involving unlimited schoogirls and unlimited numbers of naughty tentacles.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 10:15:36 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 09:50:07 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 09:18:56 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 09:17:59 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 09:17:09 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 09:16:23 PM
But Walmart ain't German!
On the other hand, we're up to our assholes in 'em.
Germans or Nazis? Both?
Um, I answered that in the part of my post you didn't quote.
Oh yeah. We Europeans aren't as smart as we look you know.
Oh, but you are. You can't fool me with your brains and your "educations" (spit).
It's only a clever ruse. We all aspire to be just as stupid as americans are portrayed.
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 10:27:52 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 10:15:36 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 09:50:07 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 09:18:56 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 09:17:59 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 09:17:09 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 09:16:23 PM
But Walmart ain't German!
On the other hand, we're up to our assholes in 'em.
Germans or Nazis? Both?
Um, I answered that in the part of my post you didn't quote.
Oh yeah. We Europeans aren't as smart as we look you know.
Oh, but you are. You can't fool me with your brains and your "educations" (spit).
It's only a clever ruse. We all aspire to be just as stupid as americans are portrayed.
Portrayed? :lol:
Totally serious, here: On average, Americans are the DUMBEST PEOPLE ON EARTH. Mostly because we've had it too good for too long.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 11:12:41 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 10:27:52 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 10:15:36 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 09:50:07 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 09:18:56 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 09:17:59 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 09:17:09 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 09:16:23 PM
But Walmart ain't German!
On the other hand, we're up to our assholes in 'em.
Germans or Nazis? Both?
Um, I answered that in the part of my post you didn't quote.
Oh yeah. We Europeans aren't as smart as we look you know.
Oh, but you are. You can't fool me with your brains and your "educations" (spit).
It's only a clever ruse. We all aspire to be just as stupid as americans are portrayed.
Portrayed? :lol:
Totally serious, here: On average, Americans are the DUMBEST PEOPLE ON EARTH. Mostly because we've had it too good for too long.
I was trying to be nice.
And Eurpoeans are following the trend. In norway, 65% of the people believe an old kook can see the future and heal cancer.
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 11:19:57 PM
I was trying to be nice.
And Eurpoeans are following the trend. In norway, 65% of the people believe an old kook can see the future and heal cancer.
L Ron Hubbard?
Anyway, our dumbness is a cultural thing, and it's driven into peoples' heads from the cradle to the grave. "We're #1!", they wheeze from their Rascal scooters, as they watch CNN footage of 18 year old kids shooting people 10,000 miles from home, for reasons that nobody can properly explain.
We have this superiority complex that is based on three things:
1) Our invincibility. Because apparently, it was our good planning that put an ocean on either side of us.
2) Using our children as weapons to make 1% of our population even more grotesquely wealthy than they already are.
3) Our weird-ass image of other nations as somehow being unable to manage their own affairs.
Americans see themselves as "rugged individualists". What most actually are is "morbidly obese helpless slobs who exist only due to the efforts of the government they screech about."
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 11:25:37 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 11:19:57 PM
I was trying to be nice.
And Eurpoeans are following the trend. In norway, 65% of the people believe an old kook can see the future and heal cancer.
L Ron Hubbard?
Anyway, our dumbness is a cultural thing, and it's driven into peoples' heads from the cradle to the grave. "We're #1!", they wheeze from their Rascal scooters, as they watch CNN footage of 18 year old kids shooting people 10,000 miles from home, for reasons that nobody can properly explain.
We have this superiority complex that is based on three things:
1) Our invincibility. Because apparently, it was our good planning that put an ocean on either side of us.
2) Using our children as weapons to make 1% of our population even more grotesquely wealthy than they already are.
3) Our weird-ass image of other nations as somehow being unable to manage their own affairs.
Americans see themselves as "rugged individualists". What most actually are is "morbidly obese helpless slobs who exist only due to the efforts of the government they screech about."
More and more I feel myself sliding into PILLZ HERE
TM territory.
No, an old Norwegian kook, named Joralf Gjerstad.
And, while I loathe the contempt for knowledge that runs rampant in Europe nowadays, I'm quite happy to not be in America. For the exact reasons you just mentioned. :horrormirth:
Quote from: Guru Coyote on April 19, 2012, 11:28:16 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 11:25:37 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 11:19:57 PM
I was trying to be nice.
And Eurpoeans are following the trend. In norway, 65% of the people believe an old kook can see the future and heal cancer.
L Ron Hubbard?
Anyway, our dumbness is a cultural thing, and it's driven into peoples' heads from the cradle to the grave. "We're #1!", they wheeze from their Rascal scooters, as they watch CNN footage of 18 year old kids shooting people 10,000 miles from home, for reasons that nobody can properly explain.
We have this superiority complex that is based on three things:
1) Our invincibility. Because apparently, it was our good planning that put an ocean on either side of us.
2) Using our children as weapons to make 1% of our population even more grotesquely wealthy than they already are.
3) Our weird-ass image of other nations as somehow being unable to manage their own affairs.
Americans see themselves as "rugged individualists". What most actually are is "morbidly obese helpless slobs who exist only due to the efforts of the government they screech about."
More and more I feel myself sliding into PILLZ HERETM territory.
Sanity is no way to run a human.
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 11:28:49 PM
No, an old Norwegian kook, named Joralf Gjerstad.
Have to look that up.
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 11:28:49 PMAnd, while I loathe the contempt for knowledge that runs rampant in Europe nowadays, I'm quite happy to not be in America. For the exact reasons you just mentioned. :horrormirth:
It's even worse than it appears.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Joralf_Gjerstad
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 11:33:08 PM
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Joralf_Gjerstad
Um.
QuoteHe has also written several autobiographies
:lulz:
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 11:37:52 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 11:33:08 PM
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Joralf_Gjerstad
Um.
QuoteHe has also written several autobiographies
:lulz:
His SIXTH autobiography is coming this summer. He's written EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM since 2003.
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 11:39:28 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 19, 2012, 11:37:52 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 19, 2012, 11:33:08 PM
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Joralf_Gjerstad
Um.
QuoteHe has also written several autobiographies
:lulz:
His SIXTH autobiography is coming this summer. He's written EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM since 2003.
:lulz: Gotta love these people.
Does he at least call them volumes or does he tell the whole thing over from the beginning?
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on April 20, 2012, 12:17:33 AM
Does he at least call them volumes or does he tell the whole thing over from the beginning?
He tells the same histories every fucking time. With differences in details. Which he later denies having done. And then, when people call him out on his bullshit, he throws tantrums.
Does he have any particular reason for writing the same book 6 times?
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on April 20, 2012, 12:22:30 AM
Does he have any particular reason for writing the same book 6 times?
Considering that they cost $50 each, and he has sold, on average 100.000 copies of every biography.... money.
What the hell is in your water there other than sulfur?
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 20, 2012, 12:18:30 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on April 20, 2012, 12:17:33 AM
Does he at least call them volumes or does he tell the whole thing over from the beginning?
He tells the same histories every fucking time. With differences in details. Which he later denies having done. And then, when people call him out on his bullshit, he throws tantrums.
That is INSANE. :lulz:
Quote from: Nigel on April 20, 2012, 12:27:41 AM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 20, 2012, 12:18:30 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on April 20, 2012, 12:17:33 AM
Does he at least call them volumes or does he tell the whole thing over from the beginning?
He tells the same histories every fucking time. With differences in details. Which he later denies having done. And then, when people call him out on his bullshit, he throws tantrums.
That is INSANE. :lulz:
What is really insane is that whenever someone dares be critical towards "that kindly old man who's never charged anyone for his healing services (he has accepted, oftentimes quite large, gifts, mind you)" the Norwegian public goes apeshit.
It seems like norways well intentioned program of enriching icelands gene pool has backfired on norway horribly....
QuoteHe has, until now, refused to be tested by 'scientist and other experts'.[1]
wat
:?
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 20, 2012, 12:18:30 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on April 20, 2012, 12:17:33 AM
Does he at least call them volumes or does he tell the whole thing over from the beginning?
He tells the same histories every fucking time. With differences in details. Which he later denies having done. And then, when people call him out on his bullshit, he throws tantrums.
GET ME THIS GUY'S CONTACT INFO!
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 20, 2012, 03:06:00 AM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 20, 2012, 12:18:30 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on April 20, 2012, 12:17:33 AM
Does he at least call them volumes or does he tell the whole thing over from the beginning?
He tells the same histories every fucking time. With differences in details. Which he later denies having done. And then, when people call him out on his bullshit, he throws tantrums.
GET ME THIS GUY'S CONTACT INFO!
I can find where a keeps-to-himself Norwegian musician's address and phone number but not this guy. :lulz:
Then again it was just a quick search.
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on April 20, 2012, 03:18:08 AM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 20, 2012, 03:06:00 AM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 20, 2012, 12:18:30 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on April 20, 2012, 12:17:33 AM
Does he at least call them volumes or does he tell the whole thing over from the beginning?
He tells the same histories every fucking time. With differences in details. Which he later denies having done. And then, when people call him out on his bullshit, he throws tantrums.
GET ME THIS GUY'S CONTACT INFO!
I can find where a keeps-to-himself Norwegian musician's address and phone number but not this guy. :lulz:
Then again it was just a quick search.
Whoops. Looks like the other dude took down his contact info in the past couple of years (Ihsahn of Emperor).
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 20, 2012, 03:06:00 AM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 20, 2012, 12:18:30 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on April 20, 2012, 12:17:33 AM
Does he at least call them volumes or does he tell the whole thing over from the beginning?
He tells the same histories every fucking time. With differences in details. Which he later denies having done. And then, when people call him out on his bullshit, he throws tantrums.
GET ME THIS GUY'S CONTACT INFO!
Joralf Gjerstad
7760 Snåsa
Norway
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 20, 2012, 01:37:58 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 20, 2012, 03:06:00 AM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 20, 2012, 12:18:30 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on April 20, 2012, 12:17:33 AM
Does he at least call them volumes or does he tell the whole thing over from the beginning?
He tells the same histories every fucking time. With differences in details. Which he later denies having done. And then, when people call him out on his bullshit, he throws tantrums.
GET ME THIS GUY'S CONTACT INFO!
Joralf Gjerstad
7760 Snåsa
Norway
I FEEL A LETTER COMING ON.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 20, 2012, 01:45:27 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 20, 2012, 01:37:58 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 20, 2012, 03:06:00 AM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on April 20, 2012, 12:18:30 AM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on April 20, 2012, 12:17:33 AM
Does he at least call them volumes or does he tell the whole thing over from the beginning?
He tells the same histories every fucking time. With differences in details. Which he later denies having done. And then, when people call him out on his bullshit, he throws tantrums.
GET ME THIS GUY'S CONTACT INFO!
Joralf Gjerstad
7760 Snåsa
Norway
I FEEL A LETTER COMING ON.
THIS WILL BE GRAND!