OKAY YOU BASTARDS, THERE'S BEEN A LOT OF BULLSHIT SPEWED ABOUT CHEESE ON THIS FORUM AND I AM HERE TO SET SHIT STRAIGHT
THIS IS CHEESE:
(http://vermontfarmstead.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/Governors-Cheddar-full.jpg)
MOTHERFUCKING VERMONT WHITE CHEDDAR UP IN THIS BITCH. YOU LIKE FLAVOR? THIS CHEESE IS MADE OF FLAVORS. THIS CHEESE IS SO INTENSE IT HAS TO SIT IN A CAVE FOR AT LEAST SIX MONTHS TO LEARN HOW TO BE AWESOME. THIS CHEESE GOES ON CRACKERS LIKE A BOSS. YOU WANT A GRILLED CHEESE? SLICE THIS SHIT UP REAL THIN AND SLAP IN ON SOME BREAD, GUY.
THIS IS NOT CHEESE:
(http://robmart.in/wp-content/uploads/2008/11/squeak.jpg)
FUCKING CHEESE CURDS ARE NOT CHEESE, OKAY? CHEESE DOES NOT SQUEAK WHEN YOU EAT IT. FOOD DOES NOT SQUEAK UNLESS YOU'RE EATING MICE WHOLE. THESE LITTLE FUCKERS ARE WHAT YOU MAKE CHEESE OUT OF. WHEN YOU EAT CHEESE CURDS, YOU ARE STRAIGHT UP EATING CHEESE ABORTIONS.
THIS IS NOT CHEESE:
(http://guycodeblog.mtv.com//wp-content/uploads/clutch/2012/09/kraft-singles-cheese-646-bon-appetitcom.jpg)
BASTARD SLIMY KRAFT SINGLES BULLSHIT. NOT CHEESE. NOT EVEN FOOD. YOU MIGHT AS WELL USE MAYONNAISE IN YOUR GODDAMNED GRILLED CHEESE, YOU DISGUSTING PHILISTINES. THEY AREN'T EVEN ALLOWED TO MARKET THIS NONSENSE AS CHEESE. LEGALLY.
LOL
+1 INTERNETS
Depends on the brand. Some sliced cheese is in fact nothing but lard bound by industrial alcohol (chemically similar to a Twinkie).
Some is actual cheese.
On the other hand, I like this false catagorization/exclusionary trend, and will now state that cheese is only cheese if you make it yourself from raw milk.
Quote from: Q. G. Pennyworth on October 09, 2013, 10:01:06 PM
THIS IS CHEESE:
(http://www.vtcheese.com/images/variety-images/cheddar.jpg)
Not unless you made it yourself. And you did it for the love of making it, not to sell it.
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on October 09, 2013, 10:04:41 PM
Depends on the brand. Some sliced cheese is in fact nothing but lard bound by industrial alcohol (chemically similar to a Twinkie).
Some is actual cheese.
On the other hand, I like this false catagorization/exclusionary trend, and will now state that cheese is only cheese if you make it yourself from raw badger milk.
FTFY
Quote from: Waffleman on October 09, 2013, 10:05:47 PM
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on October 09, 2013, 10:04:41 PM
Depends on the brand. Some sliced cheese is in fact nothing but lard bound by industrial alcohol (chemically similar to a Twinkie).
Some is actual cheese.
On the other hand, I like this false catagorization/exclusionary trend, and will now state that cheese is only cheese if you make it yourself from raw badger milk.
FTFY
And you have to milk the badgers yourself.
Same with llama cheese. If you don't personally risk the antlers of the beast, you can't call the results actual cheese.
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on October 09, 2013, 10:04:41 PM
Depends on the brand. Some sliced cheese is in fact nothing but lard bound by industrial alcohol (chemically similar to a Twinkie).
Some is actual cheese.
On the other hand, I like this false catagorization/exclusionary trend, and will now state that cheese is only cheese if you make it yourself from raw milk.
You can get sliced white american that's actually pretty good (husband's addicted to the stuff). The rant above was specifically leveled at the stuff that has to be marketed as "singles" because it doesn't meet the legal requirements to be marketed as cheese.
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on October 09, 2013, 10:04:41 PM
Depends on the brand. Some sliced cheese is in fact nothing but lard bound by industrial alcohol (chemically similar to a Twinkie).
Some is actual cheese.
On the other hand, I like this false catagorization/exclusionary trend, and will now state that cheese is only cheese if you make it yourself from raw milk.
I am of the firm opinion that anything is cheese if you just call it cheese.
Quote from: Eater of Clowns on October 09, 2013, 10:12:00 PM
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on October 09, 2013, 10:04:41 PM
Depends on the brand. Some sliced cheese is in fact nothing but lard bound by industrial alcohol (chemically similar to a Twinkie).
Some is actual cheese.
On the other hand, I like this false catagorization/exclusionary trend, and will now state that cheese is only cheese if you make it yourself from raw milk.
I am of the firm opinion that anything is cheese if you just call it cheese.
You sir, are a philistine and a sell out to Big Cheese.
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on October 09, 2013, 10:26:41 PM
Quote from: Eater of Clowns on October 09, 2013, 10:12:00 PM
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on October 09, 2013, 10:04:41 PM
Depends on the brand. Some sliced cheese is in fact nothing but lard bound by industrial alcohol (chemically similar to a Twinkie).
Some is actual cheese.
On the other hand, I like this false catagorization/exclusionary trend, and will now state that cheese is only cheese if you make it yourself from raw milk.
I am of the firm opinion that anything is cheese if you just call it cheese.
You sir, are a philistine and a sell out to Big Cheese.
Hey, call me whatever you want. I'm going to go enjoy my medium-rare cheese with cheese chutney.
I checked, though, and Kraft singles are in fact marketed as cheese.
Sort of.
Kraft Singles are marketed under "pasteurized prepared cheese product".
Ingredients: Cheddar cheese, milk, whey, milkfat, milk protein concentrate, salt, calcium phosphate, sodium citrate, whey protein concentrate, sodium phosphate, sorbic acid as a preservative, apocarotenal (color),annatto (color), enzymes, vitamin D3, cheese culture, yellow dye.
Also, I have a question: How does the slicing process at a factory invalidate the cheese aspect, whereas doing it at home doesn't?
Because slicing it at home offers the potential for cutting yourself.
Pre sliced cheese is safe cheese thus not cheese.
Quote from: Alty on October 09, 2013, 10:35:36 PM
Because slicing it at home offers the potential for cutting yourself.
Pre sliced cheese is safe cheese thus not cheese.
Who are you talking to? :lulz:
Food is NEVER safe when I'm involved.
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on October 09, 2013, 10:36:55 PM
Quote from: Alty on October 09, 2013, 10:35:36 PM
Because slicing it at home offers the potential for cutting yourself.
Pre sliced cheese is safe cheese thus not cheese.
Proof is in the cheese flavoured prepackaged pudding.
I want to see that plastic wrapped corporate cheese get dangerous.
Who are you talking to? :lulz:
Food is NEVER safe when I'm involved.
Quote from: Alty on October 09, 2013, 10:38:34 PM
Proof is in the cheese flavoured prepackaged pudding.
I want to see that plastic wrapped corporate cheese get dangerous.
2 kitchen fires so far.
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on October 09, 2013, 10:30:59 PM
I checked, though, and Kraft singles are in fact marketed as cheese.
Sort of.
Kraft Singles are marketed under "pasteurized prepared cheese product".
Ingredients: Cheddar cheese, milk, whey, milkfat, milk protein concentrate, salt, calcium phosphate, sodium citrate, whey protein concentrate, sodium phosphate, sorbic acid as a preservative, apocarotenal (color),annatto (color), enzymes, vitamin D3, cheese culture, yellow dye.
Also, I have a question: How does the slicing process at a factory invalidate the cheese aspect, whereas doing it at home doesn't?
If you have the time, the wikipedia page on processed cheese is a good read: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Processed_cheese
Basically, singles are made with cheese as an ingredient, then extra milk and other ingredients are added before it's sliced and packaged. You can get pre-sliced cheddar, provolone, swiss and other cheeses at the store, they're still very much cheese. The product being sold as "singles" is wildly different in composition and flavor. There are specific guidelines for marketing food as "cheese" "Pasteurized process cheese" "Pasteurized process cheese food" and "Pasteurized process cheese spread," while there are no guidelines whatsoever for "Pasteurized Prepared Cheese Product."
Quote from: Q. G. Pennyworth on October 09, 2013, 10:42:14 PM
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on October 09, 2013, 10:30:59 PM
I checked, though, and Kraft singles are in fact marketed as cheese.
Sort of.
Kraft Singles are marketed under "pasteurized prepared cheese product".
Ingredients: Cheddar cheese, milk, whey, milkfat, milk protein concentrate, salt, calcium phosphate, sodium citrate, whey protein concentrate, sodium phosphate, sorbic acid as a preservative, apocarotenal (color),annatto (color), enzymes, vitamin D3, cheese culture, yellow dye.
Also, I have a question: How does the slicing process at a factory invalidate the cheese aspect, whereas doing it at home doesn't?
If you have the time, the wikipedia page on processed cheese is a good read: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Processed_cheese
Basically, singles are made with cheese as an ingredient, then extra milk and other ingredients are added before it's sliced and packaged. You can get pre-sliced cheddar, provolone, swiss and other cheeses at the store, they're still very much cheese. The product being sold as "singles" is wildly different in composition and flavor. There are specific guidelines for marketing food as "cheese" "Pasteurized process cheese" "Pasteurized process cheese food" and "Pasteurized process cheese spread," while there are no guidelines whatsoever for "Pasteurized Prepared Cheese Product."
Ingredient one (largest quantity) is "cheddar cheese".
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on October 09, 2013, 10:44:19 PM
Quote from: Q. G. Pennyworth on October 09, 2013, 10:42:14 PM
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on October 09, 2013, 10:30:59 PM
I checked, though, and Kraft singles are in fact marketed as cheese.
Sort of.
Kraft Singles are marketed under "pasteurized prepared cheese product".
Ingredients: Cheddar cheese, milk, whey, milkfat, milk protein concentrate, salt, calcium phosphate, sodium citrate, whey protein concentrate, sodium phosphate, sorbic acid as a preservative, apocarotenal (color),annatto (color), enzymes, vitamin D3, cheese culture, yellow dye.
Also, I have a question: How does the slicing process at a factory invalidate the cheese aspect, whereas doing it at home doesn't?
If you have the time, the wikipedia page on processed cheese is a good read: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Processed_cheese
Basically, singles are made with cheese as an ingredient, then extra milk and other ingredients are added before it's sliced and packaged. You can get pre-sliced cheddar, provolone, swiss and other cheeses at the store, they're still very much cheese. The product being sold as "singles" is wildly different in composition and flavor. There are specific guidelines for marketing food as "cheese" "Pasteurized process cheese" "Pasteurized process cheese food" and "Pasteurized process cheese spread," while there are no guidelines whatsoever for "Pasteurized Prepared Cheese Product."
Ingredient one (largest quantity) is "cheddar cheese".
Flour is ingredient one in cake.
Quote from: Q. G. Pennyworth on October 09, 2013, 10:47:15 PM
Flour is ingredient one in cake.
No, ingredient number one in cake is GO AHEAD AND BE A FATASS, ROGER. EAT SOME FUCKING CAKE.
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on October 09, 2013, 10:54:58 PM
Quote from: Q. G. Pennyworth on October 09, 2013, 10:47:15 PM
Flour is ingredient one in cake.
No, ingredient number one in cake is GO AHEAD AND BE A FATASS, ROGER. EAT SOME FUCKING CAKE.
:spit:
Man I could go for a slice of cheese with some whipped cheese on top right now.
Quote from: Eater of Clowns on October 09, 2013, 10:58:58 PM
Man I could go for a slice of cheese with some whipped cheese on top right now.
You're sick, mister.
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on October 09, 2013, 10:39:08 PM
Quote from: Alty on October 09, 2013, 10:38:34 PM
Proof is in the cheese flavoured prepackaged pudding.
I want to see that plastic wrapped corporate cheese get dangerous.
2 kitchen fires so far.
This sounds suspiciously like "Challenge Accepted".
Fuck your fake cake, give me a big ol' bag of flour any day.
Quote from: Pæs on October 09, 2013, 11:21:07 PM
Fuck your fake cake, give me a big ol' bag of flour any day.
Fuck flour, I'll just make this bread from cake. WHAT COULD POSSIBLY GO WRONG?
Quote from: Pæs on October 09, 2013, 11:21:07 PM
Fuck your fake cake, give me a big ol' bag of flour any day.
You have to grind it yourself. With your own body as grindstone. It's not TRUE if it doesn't hurt.
QuoteLove is not all wine and roses; sometimes it's handcuffs and cheese.
/
(http://i.telegraph.co.uk/multimedia/archive/01246/Tim-Minchin_1246657c.jpg)
any thoughts on cream cheese?
Quote from: Chelagoras The Boulder on October 10, 2013, 01:33:48 AM
any thoughts on cream cheese?
Cream cheese is cheese, as is American Neufchatel. Really my hate's saved up for cheese curds and singles.
If you take a block of cheese and slice it, it has a different consistency than singles. The singles contain cheese, much in the same way that cheese and broccoli contains cheese. There may be a lot of cheese, but there's also not-cheese in there.
That kraft shit is the difference between a grilled cheese sandwich that concurs with my inner AMERICAN™, that everything is OK.
A grilled cheese sandwich made with regular cheddar, or some other cheese that's trying to show off how much smarter and cooler they are than kraft singles?
That kind of food make me want to puke ON BABIES.
America.
Quote from: Alty on October 10, 2013, 04:15:27 AM
That kraft shit is the difference between a grilled cheese sandwich that concurs with my inner AMERICAN™, that everything is OK.
A grilled cheese sandwich made with regular cheddar, or some other cheese that's trying to show off how much smarter and cooler they are than kraft singles?
That kind of food make me want to puke ON BABIES.
America.
shit yeah
Grilled cheese with cheddar on sour dough. All other sammiches are inferior.
Quote from: Q. G. Pennyworth on October 10, 2013, 04:18:23 AM
Grilled cheese with cheddar on sour dough. All other sammiches are inferior.
Balls.
Store brand wheat bread, fucking cheese slice. CHEESE SLICE.
And one kitchen, on fire.
Cheese food product is like Natty Ice.
It's beer. Sort of. But sometimes you can't afford the schmancy, flavorful, import stuff, or, sometimes you just feel like drinking cheap ass piss. Or sometimes it's actually called for, like what within a grilled cheese [food product]. But at the end of the day, it's beer drink product that your average schmoe deems worthy to call "beer" with no qualifiers. And you know. Sometimes a grilled cheese made with whole grain and pepperjack is the shit.
Quote from: Doktor Blight on October 10, 2013, 04:24:30 AM
Cheese food product is like Natty Ice.
It's beer. Sort of. But sometimes you can't afford the schmancy, flavorful, import stuff, or, sometimes you just feel like drinking cheap ass piss. Or sometimes it's actually called for, like what within a grilled cheese [food product]. But at the end of the day, it's beer drink product that your average schmoe deems worthy to call "beer" with no qualifiers. And you know. Sometimes a grilled cheese made with whole grain and pepperjack is the shit.
Yep.
Pepperjack SLICES.
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on October 10, 2013, 04:25:18 AM
Quote from: Doktor Blight on October 10, 2013, 04:24:30 AM
Cheese food product is like Natty Ice.
It's beer. Sort of. But sometimes you can't afford the schmancy, flavorful, import stuff, or, sometimes you just feel like drinking cheap ass piss. Or sometimes it's actually called for, like what within a grilled cheese [food product]. But at the end of the day, it's beer drink product that your average schmoe deems worthy to call "beer" with no qualifiers. And you know. Sometimes a grilled cheese made with whole grain and pepperjack is the shit.
Yep.
Pepperjack SLICES.
But see, that pepperjack is all pepper and all jack.
Quote from: Doktor Blight on October 10, 2013, 04:26:03 AM
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on October 10, 2013, 04:25:18 AM
Quote from: Doktor Blight on October 10, 2013, 04:24:30 AM
Cheese food product is like Natty Ice.
It's beer. Sort of. But sometimes you can't afford the schmancy, flavorful, import stuff, or, sometimes you just feel like drinking cheap ass piss. Or sometimes it's actually called for, like what within a grilled cheese [food product]. But at the end of the day, it's beer drink product that your average schmoe deems worthy to call "beer" with no qualifiers. And you know. Sometimes a grilled cheese made with whole grain and pepperjack is the shit.
Yep.
Pepperjack SLICES.
But see, that pepperjack is all pepper and all jack.
And all TASTY.
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on October 10, 2013, 04:31:15 AM
Quote from: Doktor Blight on October 10, 2013, 04:26:03 AM
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on October 10, 2013, 04:25:18 AM
Quote from: Doktor Blight on October 10, 2013, 04:24:30 AM
Cheese food product is like Natty Ice.
It's beer. Sort of. But sometimes you can't afford the schmancy, flavorful, import stuff, or, sometimes you just feel like drinking cheap ass piss. Or sometimes it's actually called for, like what within a grilled cheese [food product]. But at the end of the day, it's beer drink product that your average schmoe deems worthy to call "beer" with no qualifiers. And you know. Sometimes a grilled cheese made with whole grain and pepperjack is the shit.
Yep.
Pepperjack SLICES.
But see, that pepperjack is all pepper and all jack.
And all TASTY.
Especially when hummus is used in place of mayo.
Quote from: Doktor Blight on October 10, 2013, 04:36:00 AM
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on October 10, 2013, 04:31:15 AM
Quote from: Doktor Blight on October 10, 2013, 04:26:03 AM
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on October 10, 2013, 04:25:18 AM
Quote from: Doktor Blight on October 10, 2013, 04:24:30 AM
Cheese food product is like Natty Ice.
It's beer. Sort of. But sometimes you can't afford the schmancy, flavorful, import stuff, or, sometimes you just feel like drinking cheap ass piss. Or sometimes it's actually called for, like what within a grilled cheese [food product]. But at the end of the day, it's beer drink product that your average schmoe deems worthy to call "beer" with no qualifiers. And you know. Sometimes a grilled cheese made with whole grain and pepperjack is the shit.
Yep.
Pepperjack SLICES.
But see, that pepperjack is all pepper and all jack.
And all TASTY.
Especially when hummus is used in place of mayo.
You make me sad.
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on October 10, 2013, 04:38:35 AM
Quote from: Doktor Blight on October 10, 2013, 04:36:00 AM
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on October 10, 2013, 04:31:15 AM
Quote from: Doktor Blight on October 10, 2013, 04:26:03 AM
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on October 10, 2013, 04:25:18 AM
Quote from: Doktor Blight on October 10, 2013, 04:24:30 AM
Cheese food product is like Natty Ice.
It's beer. Sort of. But sometimes you can't afford the schmancy, flavorful, import stuff, or, sometimes you just feel like drinking cheap ass piss. Or sometimes it's actually called for, like what within a grilled cheese [food product]. But at the end of the day, it's beer drink product that your average schmoe deems worthy to call "beer" with no qualifiers. And you know. Sometimes a grilled cheese made with whole grain and pepperjack is the shit.
Yep.
Pepperjack SLICES.
But see, that pepperjack is all pepper and all jack.
And all TASTY.
Especially when hummus is used in place of mayo.
You make me sad.
Why?
Does the fact that I just added milk to the dregs of my blue cheese dressing, shook it up and drank that shit make you feel better?
I've also been consuming highly spicy condiments with no food additives. Food gets in the way of the experience, sometimes. Sometimes you just want a kick in the face with no warm winter socks involved.
Quote from: Doktor Blight on October 10, 2013, 04:44:51 AM
I've also been consuming highly spicy condiments with no food additives. Food gets in the way of the experience, sometimes. Sometimes you just want a kick in the face with no warm winter socks involved.
Other way around, here. I've more or less sworn off of condiments.
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on October 10, 2013, 04:52:17 AM
Quote from: Doktor Blight on October 10, 2013, 04:44:51 AM
I've also been consuming highly spicy condiments with no food additives. Food gets in the way of the experience, sometimes. Sometimes you just want a kick in the face with no warm winter socks involved.
Other way around, here. I've more or less sworn off of condiments.
That makes me sad. Though I will admit food is sometimes awesome on its own, unimproved with a variety of flavors. Especially if you haven't had the specific food product in a while.
Blight,
Going to eat the hell out of his next hamburger.
Quote from: Doktor Blight on October 10, 2013, 04:59:37 AM
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on October 10, 2013, 04:52:17 AM
Quote from: Doktor Blight on October 10, 2013, 04:44:51 AM
I've also been consuming highly spicy condiments with no food additives. Food gets in the way of the experience, sometimes. Sometimes you just want a kick in the face with no warm winter socks involved.
Other way around, here. I've more or less sworn off of condiments.
That makes me sad. Though I will admit food is sometimes awesome on its own, unimproved with a variety of flavors. Especially if you haven't had the specific food product in a while.
Blight,
Going to eat the hell out of his next hamburger.
I can't have no FUCKING HAMBURGERS.
that processed cheese stuff is gross.
REALLY REAL CHEESE OR GTFO
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on October 10, 2013, 05:03:22 AM
Quote from: Doktor Blight on October 10, 2013, 04:59:37 AM
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on October 10, 2013, 04:52:17 AM
Quote from: Doktor Blight on October 10, 2013, 04:44:51 AM
I've also been consuming highly spicy condiments with no food additives. Food gets in the way of the experience, sometimes. Sometimes you just want a kick in the face with no warm winter socks involved.
Other way around, here. I've more or less sworn off of condiments.
That makes me sad. Though I will admit food is sometimes awesome on its own, unimproved with a variety of flavors. Especially if you haven't had the specific food product in a while.
Blight,
Going to eat the hell out of his next hamburger.
I can't have no FUCKING HAMBURGERS.
Turkey burgers?
Quote from: Pixie on October 10, 2013, 05:07:17 AM
that processed cheese stuff is gross.
REALLY REAL CHEESE OR GTFO
Clearly, you are a cheesist.
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on October 10, 2013, 05:03:22 AM
Quote from: Doktor Blight on October 10, 2013, 04:59:37 AM
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on October 10, 2013, 04:52:17 AM
Quote from: Doktor Blight on October 10, 2013, 04:44:51 AM
I've also been consuming highly spicy condiments with no food additives. Food gets in the way of the experience, sometimes. Sometimes you just want a kick in the face with no warm winter socks involved.
Other way around, here. I've more or less sworn off of condiments.
That makes me sad. Though I will admit food is sometimes awesome on its own, unimproved with a variety of flavors. Especially if you haven't had the specific food product in a while.
Blight,
Going to eat the hell out of his next hamburger.
I can't have no FUCKING HAMBURGERS.
Life's going to suck for me in about 10 years, isn't it?
Quote from: Reverend What's His Bear on October 10, 2013, 05:10:22 AM
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on October 10, 2013, 05:03:22 AM
Quote from: Doktor Blight on October 10, 2013, 04:59:37 AM
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on October 10, 2013, 04:52:17 AM
Quote from: Doktor Blight on October 10, 2013, 04:44:51 AM
I've also been consuming highly spicy condiments with no food additives. Food gets in the way of the experience, sometimes. Sometimes you just want a kick in the face with no warm winter socks involved.
Other way around, here. I've more or less sworn off of condiments.
That makes me sad. Though I will admit food is sometimes awesome on its own, unimproved with a variety of flavors. Especially if you haven't had the specific food product in a while.
Blight,
Going to eat the hell out of his next hamburger.
I can't have no FUCKING HAMBURGERS.
Turkey burgers?
Soy, yeah? Ooooh yeah. I like those with bacon.
Quote from: Alty on October 10, 2013, 05:11:20 AM
Quote from: Pixie on October 10, 2013, 05:07:17 AM
that processed cheese stuff is gross.
REALLY REAL CHEESE OR GTFO
Clearly, you are a cheesist.
NO I JUST HAS TASTEBUDS AND NEEDS, YO.
and I need a cheeseboard and crackers
Quote from: Alty on October 10, 2013, 05:13:10 AM
Quote from: Reverend What's His Bear on October 10, 2013, 05:10:22 AM
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on October 10, 2013, 05:03:22 AM
Quote from: Doktor Blight on October 10, 2013, 04:59:37 AM
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on October 10, 2013, 04:52:17 AM
Quote from: Doktor Blight on October 10, 2013, 04:44:51 AM
I've also been consuming highly spicy condiments with no food additives. Food gets in the way of the experience, sometimes. Sometimes you just want a kick in the face with no warm winter socks involved.
Other way around, here. I've more or less sworn off of condiments.
That makes me sad. Though I will admit food is sometimes awesome on its own, unimproved with a variety of flavors. Especially if you haven't had the specific food product in a while.
Blight,
Going to eat the hell out of his next hamburger.
I can't have no FUCKING HAMBURGERS.
Turkey burgers?
Soy, yeah? Ooooh yeah. I like those with bacon.
I like turkey burgers. I like veggie burgers.
I like burger burgers best.
I think on my 39th birthday, I'll grind up all of the animals (and vegetables, apparently) and make them into a biosphere-burger. And then the doctor can tell me to never do that again.
Quote from: Pixie on October 10, 2013, 05:15:41 AM
Quote from: Alty on October 10, 2013, 05:11:20 AM
Quote from: Pixie on October 10, 2013, 05:07:17 AM
that processed cheese stuff is gross.
REALLY REAL CHEESE OR GTFO
Clearly, you are a cheesist.
NO I JUST HAS TASTEBUDS AND NEEDS, YO.
and I need a cheeseboard and crackers
I will admit, while it may not be cheese proper, there are plenty of fake cheese out there that are awesome.
Neon glop is great on some pasta sometimes.
also european and CULTURAL APPROPRIATION OF PROUD CHEESE MAKING TRADITION GOING BACK MILLENNIA AND MAKING A MOCKERY OF CHEESE IS WRONG, AMERICA.
WRONG
NEON GLOP?
The best burger I ever tasted was a veggie burger. In fucking Texas. Soy in my freedom????
Quote from: Pixie on October 10, 2013, 05:19:00 AM
NEON GLOP?
We here in Murka have our own proud cheese [food product] making traditions.
ETA: Please see squeeze cheese, velveta and tostito's salsa con queso.
Quote from: Pixie on October 10, 2013, 05:18:39 AM
also european and CULTURAL APPROPRIATION OF PROUD CHEESE MAKING TRADITION GOING BACK MILLENNIA AND MAKING A MOCKERY OF CHEESE IS WRONG, AMERICA.
WRONG
Pah.
What about MY culture? We didn't even HAVE cheese that survived the trip long enough for, well, ever since there was cheese until about 30 years ago. We've developed a culture wholly devoted to American™ Corporate Food because that shit LASTS.
There's still a state law requiring pilot bread at every airport, big or small.
Aside from spam, what else were we supposed to eat that shit with? You don't want Alaskans to be calcium deficient, do you?
DO YOU?
Quote from: Reverend What's His Bear on October 10, 2013, 05:22:11 AM
Quote from: Doktor Blight on October 10, 2013, 05:21:27 AM
Quote from: Pixie on October 10, 2013, 05:19:00 AM
NEON GLOP?
Lol spam lol
We here in Murka have our own proud cheese [food product] making traditions.
Spam is blasphemy. BLASPHEMY.
Twid,
REAL PORK OR GTFO. EXCEPT FOR ME. FOR THE NEXT YEAR. BARRING ST. PATRICKS DAY AND MY BIRTHDAY.
Quote from: Alty on October 10, 2013, 05:23:03 AM
Quote from: Pixie on October 10, 2013, 05:18:39 AM
also european and CULTURAL APPROPRIATION OF PROUD CHEESE MAKING TRADITION GOING BACK MILLENNIA AND MAKING A MOCKERY OF CHEESE IS WRONG, AMERICA.
WRONG
Your first born and polar bears.
Pah.
What about MY culture? We didn't even HAVE cheese that survived the trip long enough for, well, ever since there was cheese until about 30 years ago. We've developed a culture wholly devoted to American™ Corporate Food because that shit LASTS.
There's still a state law requiring pilot bread at every airport, big or small.
Aside from spam, what else were we supposed to eat that shit with? You don't want Alaskans to be calcium deficient, do you?
DO YOU?
Quote from: Alty on October 10, 2013, 05:23:03 AM
Quote from: Pixie on October 10, 2013, 05:18:39 AM
also european and CULTURAL APPROPRIATION OF PROUD CHEESE MAKING TRADITION GOING BACK MILLENNIA AND MAKING A MOCKERY OF CHEESE IS WRONG, AMERICA.
WRONG
Pah.
What about MY culture? We didn't even HAVE cheese that survived the trip long enough for, well, ever since there was cheese until about 30 years ago. We've developed a culture wholly devoted to American™ Corporate Food because that shit LASTS.
There's still a state law requiring pilot bread at every airport, big or small.
Aside from spam, what else were we supposed to eat that shit with? You don't want Alaskans to be calcium deficient, do you?
DO YOU?
Wait, you guys don't get your calcium from forcibly stealing it from polar bear cubs?
Quote from: Reverend What's His Bear on October 10, 2013, 05:25:17 AM
Quote from: Alty on October 10, 2013, 05:23:03 AM
Quote from: Pixie on October 10, 2013, 05:18:39 AM
also european and CULTURAL APPROPRIATION OF PROUD CHEESE MAKING TRADITION GOING BACK MILLENNIA AND MAKING A MOCKERY OF CHEESE IS WRONG, AMERICA.
WRONG
Your first born and polar bears.
Pah.
What about MY culture? We didn't even HAVE cheese that survived the trip long enough for, well, ever since there was cheese until about 30 years ago. We've developed a culture wholly devoted to American™ Corporate Food because that shit LASTS.
There's still a state law requiring pilot bread at every airport, big or small.
Aside from spam, what else were we supposed to eat that shit with? You don't want Alaskans to be calcium deficient, do you?
DO YOU?
BEARMAN.
LEARN TO QUOTE.
you can eat what you want I'm going to but i draw the line at calling it cheese or eating it.
I fancy some gruyere. or emmental.
Tablet and fat fingers. Wife on laptop.
Quote from: Pixie on October 10, 2013, 05:27:08 AM
you can eat what you want I'm going to but i draw the line at calling it cheese or eating it.
I fancy some gruyere. or emmental.
Neon glop is a glorious experience. Not one to indulge in regularly, mind you, for, well, every reason. But you should have neon glop at least once. Especially comfortable in the knowledge that it's not a common commodity over there.
Hey, does anyone remember if Trip had squeeze cheese when he was here? I seem to recall him being fascinated with the disturbing conundrum that it presents to the non-American.
Quote from: Doktor Blight on October 10, 2013, 05:31:10 AM
Quote from: Pixie on October 10, 2013, 05:27:08 AM
you can eat what you want I'm going to but i draw the line at calling it cheese or eating it.
I fancy some gruyere. or emmental.
Neon glop is a glorious experience. Not one to indulge in regularly, mind you, for, well, every reason. But you should have neon glop at least once. Especially comfortable in the knowledge that it's not a common commodity over there.
Hey, does anyone remember if Trip had squeeze cheese when he was here? I seem to recall him being fascinated with the disturbing conundrum that it presents to the non-American.
is it similar to the kraft mac'n'cheese sauce?
I don't get why you put annatto in the cheese and mek it all orange.
We have cheese spreads here, and I only eat one of them (http://www.seriouslystrongcheddar.co.uk/sites/default/files/imagecache/product_main/products/ss-spreadable-125g-front-2_0.jpg)
This one actually tastes like mature cheddar.
Quote from: Pixie on October 10, 2013, 05:37:43 AM
Quote from: Doktor Blight on October 10, 2013, 05:31:10 AM
Quote from: Pixie on October 10, 2013, 05:27:08 AM
you can eat what you want I'm going to but i draw the line at calling it cheese or eating it.
I fancy some gruyere. or emmental.
Neon glop is a glorious experience. Not one to indulge in regularly, mind you, for, well, every reason. But you should have neon glop at least once. Especially comfortable in the knowledge that it's not a common commodity over there.
Hey, does anyone remember if Trip had squeeze cheese when he was here? I seem to recall him being fascinated with the disturbing conundrum that it presents to the non-American.
is it similar to the kraft mac'n'cheese sauce?
I don't get why you put annatto in the cheese and mek it all orange.
We have cheese spreads here, and I only eat one of them (http://www.seriouslystrongcheddar.co.uk/sites/default/files/imagecache/product_main/products/ss-spreadable-125g-front-2_0.jpg)
This one actually tastes like mature cheddar.
(http://farm1.staticflickr.com/55/109435006_4674906952_o.jpg)
Quote from: Doktor Blight on October 10, 2013, 05:41:13 AM
Quote from: Pixie on October 10, 2013, 05:37:43 AM
Quote from: Doktor Blight on October 10, 2013, 05:31:10 AM
Quote from: Pixie on October 10, 2013, 05:27:08 AM
you can eat what you want I'm going to but i draw the line at calling it cheese or eating it.
I fancy some gruyere. or emmental.
Neon glop is a glorious experience. Not one to indulge in regularly, mind you, for, well, every reason. But you should have neon glop at least once. Especially comfortable in the knowledge that it's not a common commodity over there.
Hey, does anyone remember if Trip had squeeze cheese when he was here? I seem to recall him being fascinated with the disturbing conundrum that it presents to the non-American.
is it similar to the kraft mac'n'cheese sauce?
I don't get why you put annatto in the cheese and mek it all orange.
We have cheese spreads here, and I only eat one of them (http://www.seriouslystrongcheddar.co.uk/sites/default/files/imagecache/product_main/products/ss-spreadable-125g-front-2_0.jpg)
This one actually tastes like mature cheddar.
(http://farm1.staticflickr.com/55/109435006_4674906952_o.jpg)
:fap: :fap: :fap:
How the hell do I resize pictures, lol
so, like nacho cheese but without the spicy?
and like Kraft mac'n'cheese cheese sauce?
IN A CAN? :|
I SERIOUSLY CAN'T ACTUALLY THINK WHAT THAT WOULD TASTE LIKE :horrormirth:
Quote from: Pixie on October 10, 2013, 05:45:08 AM
so, like nacho cheese but without the spicy?
and like Kraft mac'n'cheese cheese sauce?
IN A CAN? :|
Yes.
Also this.
(http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/6/69/Velveeta_Cheese.JPG)
Is it cheese? Is it butter? Is it chudder?
Quote from: Pixie on October 10, 2013, 05:45:48 AM
I SERIOUSLY CAN'T ACTUALLY THINK WHAT THAT WOULD TASTE LIKE :horrormirth:
It tastes like America.
wat?
I
Just...
I won't even eat mild cheddar because it is too bland.
and what is that patty of fat and dairy shit?
This thread needs a trigger warning for Europeans.
:horrormirth:
(http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-fnySblJviBc/TnkXXKSKOGI/AAAAAAAAAjs/sfNM53r2U5s/s1600/Can-of-Cheese.jpg)
Quote from: Pixie on October 10, 2013, 05:48:56 AM
wat?
I
Just...
I won't even eat mild cheddar because it is too bland.
and what is that patty of fat and dairy shit?
This thread needs a trigger warning for Europeans.
I'm a European, too. :evil:
That, my dear, is Velveeta cheese, unwrapped. It's. GLORIOUS.
Also, when in doubt about what American factory food tastes like, assume salt or sugar.
how does that even taste nice?
the Kraft mac and cheese i bought once as a joke for Payne, and it was not nice at all (we'd ran out of money and such).
the nacho cheese sauce warmed up is okay but is a sometimes food. I think the chili saves it.
BUT, TWID, YOU ARE FROM IRISH PEEPS. YOUR ANCESTORS KNOW HOW TO MAKE CHEDDAR SO STRONG IT'S MAKE A NUN'S TOES CURL.
:horrormirth:
Quote from: Doktor Blight on October 10, 2013, 05:51:51 AM
Quote from: Pixie on October 10, 2013, 05:48:56 AM
wat?
I
Just...
I won't even eat mild cheddar because it is too bland.
and what is that patty of fat and dairy shit?
This thread needs a trigger warning for Europeans.
I'm a European, too. :evil:
That, my dear, is Velveeta cheese, unwrapped. It's. GLORIOUS.
i DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT VELVEETA TASTES LIKE AND I DON'T THINK I WANNA.
Seriously, I won't eat Dairylea spread. My mum once put it in a sandwich for me for my packed lunch at school and I cried.
Quote from: Pixie on October 10, 2013, 05:56:53 AM
how does that even taste nice?
the Kraft mac and cheese i bought once as a joke for Payne, and it was not nice at all (we'd ran out of money and such).
the nacho cheese sauce warmed up is okay but is a sometimes food. I think the chili saves it.
BUT, TWID, YOU ARE FROM IRISH PEEPS. YOUR ANCESTORS KNOW HOW TO MAKE CHEDDAR SO STRONG IT'S MAKE A NUN'S TOES CURL.
:horrormirth:
Sure, and I love me some Irish cheese. Actually, I prefer it over American cheese. It has a certain nuance to it, much like the butter or the milk, or the candy. Same thing with the pork products, though that has no nuance to it, it flat out tells you its different.
I also like high end American cheeses.
Kinda like how I like Smithwicks, Sam Adams and also, inexplicably, PBR. Sometimes you just feel like eating/drinking the really obviously bad one.
I think my reactions are similar to Trip's, in that respect.
Quote from: Pixie on October 10, 2013, 06:06:25 AM
I think my reactions are similar to Trip's, in that respect.
I wonder if he ever ate it.
But this is why America is awesome.
Only here can you do this shit with cheese [food product]
(http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_0E5sY7uxci4/SXiO_iDdyyI/AAAAAAAAAdE/JjJYBxI1j-4/s400/easy+cheese.jpg)
I received easy cheese from my mom while in Germany and not one of them would touch it.
Quote from: Alty on October 10, 2013, 06:18:45 AM
I received easy cheese from my mom while in Germany and not one of them would touch it.
And that's why we beat them twice.
Quote from: Doktor Blight on October 10, 2013, 05:43:18 AM
How the hell do I resize pictures, lol
[img]http://i.imgur.com/n09qbYs.jpg[/img](http://i.imgur.com/n09qbYs.jpg)
[img width=200]http://i.imgur.com/n09qbYs.jpg[/img]ASPECT RATIO IS CONSERVED, MOTHERFUCKER, IF YOU DON'T SPECIFY A HEIGHT.
(http://i.imgur.com/n09qbYs.jpg)
[img width=20 height=100]http://i.imgur.com/n09qbYs.jpg[/img]BEST JUST DEFINE ONE OF THE DIMENSIONS ELSE YOU CAN FUCK SHIT UP
(http://i.imgur.com/n09qbYs.jpg)
Define width, not height. Got it.
Well, one or the other, unless you're a level three user.
Quote from: Pæs on October 10, 2013, 06:27:18 AM
Well, one or the other, unless you're a level three user.
I know next to shit about computers.
Quote from: Q. G. Pennyworth on October 10, 2013, 04:18:23 AM
Grilled cheese with cheddar on sour dough. All other sammiches are inferior.
THAT SHIT IS FROM THE GODS. IT DOESN'T EVEN NEED FUCKING BUTTER. JUST SOURDOUGH, A CAST IRON SKILLET AND EXTRA SHARP CHEDDAR, FUCKING A, MOTHERFUCKERS.
Cheese is ranked like this
1) Cheese: is cheese. There's all kinds, at all prices, so no excuse not to get CHEESE.
2) Cheese food: Might have cheese in it, but people on WIC can't get it with the vouchers because it has crap in it.
3) Cheese product: Is the shit they put on McDonald's. I don't know WTF it is, I'm not 100% sure it's cheese. Maybe it's zit squeezins salted and tinted orange with floor sweepings from the Cheetos factory.
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on October 10, 2013, 04:25:18 AM
Quote from: Doktor Blight on October 10, 2013, 04:24:30 AM
Cheese food product is like Natty Ice.
It's beer. Sort of. But sometimes you can't afford the schmancy, flavorful, import stuff, or, sometimes you just feel like drinking cheap ass piss. Or sometimes it's actually called for, like what within a grilled cheese [food product]. But at the end of the day, it's beer drink product that your average schmoe deems worthy to call "beer" with no qualifiers. And you know. Sometimes a grilled cheese made with whole grain and pepperjack is the shit.
Yep.
Pepperjack SLICES.
Pure cheese can come in slices.
Cheese food melts smooth, without lumps and stuff. Like Velveeta. It's crap, but it makes pretty dip and nacho sauce.
Quote from: Doktor Blight on October 10, 2013, 05:31:10 AM
Quote from: Pixie on October 10, 2013, 05:27:08 AM
you can eat what you want I'm going to but i draw the line at calling it cheese or eating it.
I fancy some gruyere. or emmental.
Neon glop is a glorious experience. Not one to indulge in regularly, mind you, for, well, every reason. But you should have neon glop at least once. Especially comfortable in the knowledge that it's not a common commodity over there.
Hey, does anyone remember if Trip had squeeze cheese when he was here? I seem to recall him being fascinated with the disturbing conundrum that it presents to the non-American.
Is neon glop made from that dayglo powder that comes in Kraft mac & "cheese"?
America put the Philly cheese steak on a PEDESTAL. They use Cheese Whiz for that shit. Or maybe SPRAY CHEESE.
Quote from: stelz on October 10, 2013, 06:49:15 AM
Quote from: Doktor Blight on October 10, 2013, 05:31:10 AM
Quote from: Pixie on October 10, 2013, 05:27:08 AM
you can eat what you want I'm going to but i draw the line at calling it cheese or eating it.
I fancy some gruyere. or emmental.
Neon glop is a glorious experience. Not one to indulge in regularly, mind you, for, well, every reason. But you should have neon glop at least once. Especially comfortable in the knowledge that it's not a common commodity over there.
Hey, does anyone remember if Trip had squeeze cheese when he was here? I seem to recall him being fascinated with the disturbing conundrum that it presents to the non-American.
Is neon glop made from that dayglo powder that comes in Kraft mac & "cheese"?
America put the Philly cheese steak on a PEDESTAL. They use Cheese Whiz for that shit. Or maybe SPRAY CHEESE.
All of the above. :)
Velveta makes awesome mac-n-cheese.
Spam is wonderful
Easy Cheese is great on a Ritz (especially the bacon cheddar flavor)
Kraft Singles are absolute shit. Give me store brand sliced cheese any day.
I, of course, also like actual cheese. Colby Jack is my fave.
AMERICA, YOUR SHIT AIN'T RIGHT.
a DOUBLE CHEESEBURGER IS ALWAYS BETTER WITH THIN SLICED REALLY REAL CHEDDAR (AND BROWN SAUCE) although a cheeseburger is the only place i will tolerate that kraft singles/ "cheese" slices stuff.
I actually prefer "plastic cheese" to real cheese, on a burger.
BUT THAT'S THE ONE AND ONLY TIME I'LL EAT THAT SHIT
Quote from: P3nT4gR4m on October 10, 2013, 02:13:12 PM
I actually prefer "plastic cheese" to real cheese, on a burger.
BUT THAT'S THE ONE AND ONLY TIME I'LL EAT THAT SHIT
Me too. Also on grilled cheese. I'm a fucking heathen.
Also, I enjoy Mama's Family.
Quote from: Hoopla on October 10, 2013, 02:16:33 PM
Quote from: P3nT4gR4m on October 10, 2013, 02:13:12 PM
I actually prefer "plastic cheese" to real cheese, on a burger.
BUT THAT'S THE ONE AND ONLY TIME I'LL EAT THAT SHIT
Me too. Also on grilled cheese. I'm a fucking heathen.
Also, I enjoy Mama's Family.
That some kind of incest euphemism? :argh!:
Quote from: P3nT4gR4m on October 10, 2013, 02:29:11 PM
Quote from: Hoopla on October 10, 2013, 02:16:33 PM
Quote from: P3nT4gR4m on October 10, 2013, 02:13:12 PM
I actually prefer "plastic cheese" to real cheese, on a burger.
BUT THAT'S THE ONE AND ONLY TIME I'LL EAT THAT SHIT
Me too. Also on grilled cheese. I'm a fucking heathen.
Also, I enjoy Mama's Family.
That some kind of incest euphemism? :argh!:
Naw, just hanging all my dirty laundry out in one post. I also enjoy the musical stylings of Tiny Tim.
SUP, BITCHES? YOU WANT SOME CHEESE SLICES?
HERE'S SOME MOTHERFUCKING CHEESE SLICES!
(https://homedelivery.winderfarms.com/uploads/productImages/ProductDetailImages/IMG00005131.jpg)
THAT SHIT IS SLICED PROVOLONE, NERDS. IT HAS FLAVORS AND GOES GREAT WITH EVERYTHING. IT LOVES MEATS BEST OF ALL, SO GO MELT THAT SHIT ON SOME MEATBALLS AND MAKE THE MOST DELICIOUS SUB EVER. DON'T LIKE MEATBALLS? PUT IT IN SOME BREAD WITH SOME GODDAMN LUNCHMEATS AND GO TO TOWN. PUT IT IN A GRILLED CHEESE WITH BACON BECAUSE WHY AREN'T YOU MAKING YOUR GRILLED CHEESES WITH BACON?
YOU WANNA BE A FANCY BASTARD? BAM!
(http://rememberinggeorge.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/02/swiss_cheese_slices.jpg)
SLICED TITTYFUCKING SWISS CHEESE. IT'S EVEN SHAPED TO FIT YOUR BREAD WITHOUT MESSING AROUND, BECAUSE THE LORDS OF CHEESE LOVE YOU SO DAMN MUCH. I DON'T EVEN LIKE THIS CHEESE, BUT I KNOW IT'S A REAL CHEESE. PUT IT ON A BURGER OR SOME SHIT, I DON'T KNOW. THEY'RE ALWAYS PUTTING THIS WHOLEY HOLEY CHEESE ON THINGS THAT HAVE AVOCADOS, SO MAYBE THAT'S A THING. THE HOLES COME FROM BACTERIA FARTS, AND THAT'S FUCKING METAL.
NOT HOT ENOUGH FOR YOU? TRY THIS SHIT:
(http://www.samlagrassas.com/products/pepper-jack-cheese.jpg)
SLICED PEPPERJACK CHEESE. THIS SALTY-SPICY-CREAMY MANNA FROM CHEESE HEAVEN IS THE BEST THING YOU PUT IN YOUR FACE SINCE YOU HAD A FACE. IT'S MADE FROM MONTEREY JACK CHEESE AND JALAPENOS, NO FUCKING AROUND WITH "ADDED DAIRY PRODUCTS" AND SHIT IN HERE, THIS IS REAL CHEESE, FULL OF REAL GODDAMN SPICY PEPPERS. PUT THAT IN A LITTLE TORTILLA AND MAKE YOURSELF A QUESADILLA STAT.
I just realised - QGP is the female version of Cramulus.
THESE PEOPLE MUST NEVER BREED TOGETHER :horrormirth:
Quote from: P3nT4gR4m on October 10, 2013, 02:37:19 PM
I just realised - QGP is the female version of Cramulus.
THESE PEOPLE MUST NEVER BREED TOGETHER :horrormirth:
DOUR SAID I HAVE 12 HUSBANDS. I'M GONNA HAVE TO MAKE BABIES WITH EVERYONE ON THIS BOARD.
I make grilled cheese with bacon and really real cheese all the time. it's the shit.
I always only use real cheese on my grilled cheese. I don't like singles, they're sticky.
Quote from: Not Your Nigel on October 10, 2013, 04:21:41 PM
I always only use real cheese on my grilled cheese. I don't like singles, they're sticky.
And flammable.
But I love them anyway. And they love me.
I think all cheese is flammable, which should please you. Cheese is your friend!
i like singles. they're somewhat of a novelty here.
Quote from: Waffleman on October 10, 2013, 04:54:26 PM
i like singles. they're somewhat of a novelty here.
My daughter buys them. Sometimes I eat them out of the fridge cold, with loathing and fascination. And then I feel a little dirty.
They're sweet. Cheese shouldn't be sweet.
Quote from: Q. G. Pennyworth on October 10, 2013, 02:40:28 PM
Quote from: P3nT4gR4m on October 10, 2013, 02:37:19 PM
I just realised - QGP is the female version of Cramulus.
THESE PEOPLE MUST NEVER BREED TOGETHER :horrormirth:
DOUR SAID I HAVE 12 HUSBANDS. I'M GONNA HAVE TO MAKE BABIES WITH EVERYONE ON THIS BOARD.
Woah, i never agreed to that. You'll have to pull cheese-support from my cold, dead hands.
I love slices of provolone cheese on sandwiches, and I also like processed cheese. I think there's room for both.
Quote from: Q. G. Pennyworth on October 10, 2013, 02:40:28 PM
Quote from: P3nT4gR4m on October 10, 2013, 02:37:19 PM
I just realised - QGP is the female version of Cramulus.
THESE PEOPLE MUST NEVER BREED TOGETHER :horrormirth:
DOUR SAID I HAVE 12 HUSBANDS. I'M GONNA HAVE TO MAKE BABIES WITH EVERYONE ON THIS BOARD.
Crap. Now I'm pregnant.
Quote from: Not Your Nigel on October 10, 2013, 05:18:00 PM
They're sweet. Cheese shouldn't be sweet.
I've never encountered a sweet cheese. Then again I've never encountered a sweet fruit either.
Will have to ask around if others consider cheese singles sweet...
Listen, if you make a GCSandwich without those Kraft singles then...then what the hell are we fighting all these wars for?
What in the hell is America™ even for, if not those tiny, shiny miracles?
Pepper jack, btw, while tasty, is obviously food for communists and other unwashed people.
Quote from: Alty on October 10, 2013, 05:35:21 PM
Listen, if you make a GCSandwich without those Kraft singles then...then what the hell are we fighting all these wars for?
What in the hell is America™ even for, if not those tiny, shiny miracles?
Pepper jack, btw, while tasty, is obviously food for communists and other unwashed people.
If I have to slice my own cheese, then why the FUCK did we even revolt from England?
I can't live like this.
Quote from: Not Your Nigel on October 10, 2013, 05:18:00 PM
They're sweet. Cheese shouldn't be sweet.
OBJECTION!(http://cheesesecrets.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/09/White-Stilton-Mango-Ginger-300x300.jpg)
This stuff is delicious! I basically can't stop eating it.
Quote from: Not Your Nigel on October 10, 2013, 05:17:30 PM
Quote from: Waffleman on October 10, 2013, 04:54:26 PM
i like singles. they're somewhat of a novelty here.
My daughter buys them. Sometimes I eat them out of the fridge cold, with loathing and fascination. And then I feel a little dirty.
me too.
some times I wrap one around a cold hot dog
I also have made gcs with singles, sliced cheddar and what ever random fancy cheese is in the fridge.
Quote from: Demolition Squid on October 10, 2013, 05:39:03 PM
Quote from: Not Your Nigel on October 10, 2013, 05:18:00 PM
They're sweet. Cheese shouldn't be sweet.
OBJECTION!
(http://cheesesecrets.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/09/White-Stilton-Mango-Ginger-300x300.jpg)
This stuff is delicious! I basically can't stop eating it.
(http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-eEKDdyjLC-o/UjUYpoICvgI/AAAAAAAAA_o/e_QnDtjpEyc/s320/FryNarrowedEyes.jpg)
The fuck is that?
Quote from: Don Coyote on October 10, 2013, 05:42:11 PM
Quote from: Not Your Nigel on October 10, 2013, 05:17:30 PM
Quote from: Waffleman on October 10, 2013, 04:54:26 PM
i like singles. they're somewhat of a novelty here.
My daughter buys them. Sometimes I eat them out of the fridge cold, with loathing and fascination. And then I feel a little dirty.
me too.
some times I wrap one around a cold hot dog
Ice-cold refreshing hot dogs
totally one of my culinary sins.
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on October 10, 2013, 05:37:28 PM
Quote from: Alty on October 10, 2013, 05:35:21 PM
Listen, if you make a GCSandwich without those Kraft singles then...then what the hell are we fighting all these wars for?
What in the hell is America™ even for, if not those tiny, shiny miracles?
Pepper jack, btw, while tasty, is obviously food for communists and other unwashed people.
If I have to slice my own cheese, then why the FUCK did we even revolt from England?
I can't live like this.
I told you, they sell slices of real cheese. Look, even from your favorite junk cheese-substitute brand!
(http://c.shld.net/rpx/i/s/i/spin/image/spin_prod_ec_766569201?hei=315&wid=315&op_sharpen=1&resMode=sharp&op_usm=0.9,0.5,0,0)
Quote from: Not Your Nigel on October 10, 2013, 05:52:51 PM
(http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-eEKDdyjLC-o/UjUYpoICvgI/AAAAAAAAA_o/e_QnDtjpEyc/s320/FryNarrowedEyes.jpg)
The fuck is that?
White stilton with mango and ginger.
It is incredibly sweet, an excellent dessert cheese, but also great melted over mushrooms on toast. Its also ridiculously expensive for cheese.
Quote from: Sita on October 10, 2013, 05:33:10 PM
Quote from: Not Your Nigel on October 10, 2013, 05:18:00 PM
They're sweet. Cheese shouldn't be sweet.
I've never encountered a sweet cheese. Then again I've never encountered a sweet fruit either.
Will have to ask around if others consider cheese singles sweet...
Your taste buds are broken. This is not cheese's fault.
Quote from: Sita on October 10, 2013, 05:33:10 PM
Quote from: Not Your Nigel on October 10, 2013, 05:18:00 PM
They're sweet. Cheese shouldn't be sweet.
I've never encountered a sweet cheese. Then again I've never encountered a sweet fruit either.
Will have to ask around if others consider cheese singles sweet...
That's actually incredibly unusual, and you might want to ask a doctor about it because it could signify something medically wrong that could be corrected. I've never heard of it before, but it's worth looking into. Normally, sweetness is the flavor that we are most sensitive to; our taste buds can react to a single molecule of sugar. It's a survival mechanism, because sugars are our essential fuel.
Do you ever use artificial sweeteners, by any chance?
Quote from: Not Your Nigel on October 10, 2013, 06:27:44 PM
Quote from: Sita on October 10, 2013, 05:33:10 PM
Quote from: Not Your Nigel on October 10, 2013, 05:18:00 PM
They're sweet. Cheese shouldn't be sweet.
I've never encountered a sweet cheese. Then again I've never encountered a sweet fruit either.
Will have to ask around if others consider cheese singles sweet...
That's actually incredibly unusual, and you might want to ask a doctor about it because it could signify something medically wrong that could be corrected. I've never heard of it before, but it's worth looking into. Normally, sweetness is the flavor that we are most sensitive to; our taste buds can react to a single molecule of sugar. It's a survival mechanism, because sugars are our essential fuel.
The only other person I've ever heard of who can't taste sweet (or doesn't understand sweet) is the husband, and he's got hella brain damage. I second Nigel's suggestion of talking to a someone about it. There's a lot of whining forum posts about not tasting sweet, but here's the first actual article I found addressing taste disorders: http://www.nbcnews.com/health/taste-disorder-sweet-aint-sweet-1C6437326
Short version, they're a real thing and often caused by real things that it may be helpful to be aware of.
Can't stand artificial sweeteners.
I do find certain things sweet. Granulated sugar and Pepsi (but no other soda) are two that come to mind right away.
I can detect a richness to things like frosting on cake, but not a sweetness.
Quote from: Sita on October 10, 2013, 06:42:22 PM
Can't stand artificial sweeteners.
I do find certain things sweet. Granulated sugar and Pepsi (but no other soda) are two that come to mind right away.
I can detect a richness to things like frosting on cake, but not a sweetness.
This is identical to the husband's thing. You didn't have scarlet fever as a kid, by any chance?
Quote from: Sita on October 10, 2013, 06:42:22 PM
Can't stand artificial sweeteners.
I do find certain things sweet. Granulated sugar and Pepsi (but no other soda) are two that come to mind right away.
I can detect a richness to things like frosting on cake, but not a sweetness.
Has it always been this way, even as a child? Can you taste salty and bitter normally?
Quote from: Q. G. Pennyworth on October 10, 2013, 06:43:58 PM
Quote from: Sita on October 10, 2013, 06:42:22 PM
Can't stand artificial sweeteners.
I do find certain things sweet. Granulated sugar and Pepsi (but no other soda) are two that come to mind right away.
I can detect a richness to things like frosting on cake, but not a sweetness.
This is identical to the husband's thing. You didn't have scarlet fever as a kid, by any chance?
Nope.
Only bad thing I can remember having as a kid is a severe allergic reaction that I had to take some kind of steroid to get over it.
Quote from: Not Your Nigel on October 10, 2013, 06:49:33 PM
Quote from: Sita on October 10, 2013, 06:42:22 PM
Can't stand artificial sweeteners.
I do find certain things sweet. Granulated sugar and Pepsi (but no other soda) are two that come to mind right away.
I can detect a richness to things like frosting on cake, but not a sweetness.
Has it always been this way, even as a child? Can you taste salty and bitter normally?
I think so, though I hadn't really thought about it until recently.
Can taste salty and bitter perfectly fine.
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Quote from: Demolition Squid on October 10, 2013, 05:39:03 PM
Quote from: Not Your Nigel on October 10, 2013, 05:18:00 PM
They're sweet. Cheese shouldn't be sweet.
OBJECTION!
(http://cheesesecrets.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/09/White-Stilton-Mango-Ginger-300x300.jpg)
This stuff is delicious! I basically can't stop eating it.
White stilton and apricot?
I had white stilton with strawberry once, you can get wensleydale and cranberry. Hell I once had wensleydale and belgian chocolate once. (that was pretty fucking sublime, i tell you) I might've imagined the cheese with blueberries, though... Oh, no.. Google tells me that that is a real thing! (wensleydale with sweet things is a british quirk, obvs)
I have some jerk seasoning and mango cheddar in the fridge.
That one's mango and ginger. I don't like the apricot one so much... but strawberries sound wonderful.
M&S has been doing a real push on luxury cheeses lately, their ranges are really good!
Wensleydale and cranberry is nice but, for my money, it's too cranberry. They do a blueberry one and it's a much better balance. Cheese really sings!
Quote from: Cain on October 10, 2013, 06:59:33 PM
I'm going to Gruyere to buy cheese on Saturday.
You may proceed to be jelly.
My jellying has commenced.
:fap:
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Quote from: Q. G. Pennyworth on October 10, 2013, 02:34:08 PM
SUP, BITCHES? YOU WANT SOME CHEESE SLICES?
HERE'S SOME MOTHERFUCKING CHEESE SLICES!
(https://homedelivery.winderfarms.com/uploads/productImages/ProductDetailImages/IMG00005131.jpg)
THAT SHIT IS SLICED PROVOLONE, NERDS. IT HAS FLAVORS AND GOES GREAT WITH EVERYTHING. IT LOVES MEATS BEST OF ALL, SO GO MELT THAT SHIT ON SOME MEATBALLS AND MAKE THE MOST DELICIOUS SUB EVER. DON'T LIKE MEATBALLS? PUT IT IN SOME BREAD WITH SOME GODDAMN LUNCHMEATS AND GO TO TOWN. PUT IT IN A GRILLED CHEESE WITH BACON BECAUSE WHY AREN'T YOU MAKING YOUR GRILLED CHEESES WITH BACON?
BECAUSE I PUT SMOKED PROVOLONE ON SOURDOUGH RYE, OR HOW ABOUT ON A HUNK OF FOCACCIA WITH LITTLE CLOVES OF ROASTED CARMELIZED GARLIC BAKED INTO IT, BITCHES? THAT SHIT MAKES BACON CRY LIKE A LITTLE BITCH - SO MUCH GODDAMN FLAVOR BITCHES BETTER STAND BACK WHEN YOU EAT THAT SHIT OR THE SHOCKWAVES FROM THE BIG SHUDDERING ORGASM YOU'RE GONNA HAVE WILL MAKE BRICKS AND SHIT FALL ON THEM.
I actually have some bread mix to mek a foccacia when I am not sick.
Quote from: P3nT4gR4m on October 10, 2013, 07:38:37 PM
Wensleydale
Yes?
QuoteAh, I'll have some of that.
Oh, I thought you were talking to me. Mr. Wensleydale, that's my name.
(http://static.squarespace.com/static/511d5bd9e4b02acb17b52ac6/511d5bd9e4b02acb17b52add/51768d13e4b043d62e4a8344/1366723860702/6472717133_53f9706b5a_z.jpg?format=750w)
Quote from: Hoopla on October 10, 2013, 10:01:11 PM
Quote from: P3nT4gR4m on October 10, 2013, 07:38:37 PM
Wensleydale
Yes?
QuoteAh, I'll have some of that.
Oh, I thought you were talking to me. Mr. Wensleydale, that's my name.
Thank you for having the common decency to only use one of the more oblique Python references.
Quote from: Q. G. Pennyworth on October 09, 2013, 10:01:06 PM
THIS IS NOT CHEESE:
(http://robmart.in/wp-content/uploads/2008/11/squeak.jpg)
FUCKING CHEESE CURDS ARE NOT CHEESE, OKAY? CHEESE DOES NOT SQUEAK WHEN YOU EAT IT. FOOD DOES NOT SQUEAK UNLESS YOU'RE EATING MICE WHOLE. THESE LITTLE FUCKERS ARE WHAT YOU MAKE CHEESE OUT OF. WHEN YOU EAT CHEESE CURDS, YOU ARE STRAIGHT UP EATING CHEESE ABORTIONS.
OH NO YOU DIDN'T JUST STEP!!!1~Kai,
Wisconsin raised.
Quote from: Q. G. Pennyworth on October 10, 2013, 02:34:08 PM
WHY AREN'T YOU MAKING YOUR GRILLED CHEESES WITH BACON?
I had the best grilled cheese sammitch at one point, with ham, sliced onions, and (I think) Italian dressing.
BTW, did you know that if you leave Veveeta long enough, it grows salt crystals all over it like some cheap Magic Rocks set? THAT SHIT AIN'T RIGHT.
Quote from: Pere Ubu on October 12, 2013, 04:33:29 PM
Quote from: Q. G. Pennyworth on October 10, 2013, 02:34:08 PM
WHY AREN'T YOU MAKING YOUR GRILLED CHEESES WITH BACON?[/size]
I had the best grilled cheese sammitch at one point, with ham, sliced onions, and (I think) Italian dressing.
BTW, did you know that if you leave Veveeta long enough, it grows salt crystals all over it like some cheap Magic Rocks set? THAT SHIT AIN'T RIGHT.
Velveeta is NOT CHEESE.
It's a vaguely cheese-like substance used for dip and nacho sauce recipes because it melts smoothly.
CHEESE HAS LUMPS WHEN YOU MELT IT. IT DOESN'T HAVE TO BE PRETTY. It has SUBSTANCE.